Chapter 17

Ari

A n occasional sleepless night was nothing new to me. Normally, I’d just feel a little groggy in the morning, nothing a second cup of coffee wouldn’t fix. Sometimes, I even stayed up intentionally, preferring catching up on work to a fitful sleep plagued by nightmares. A sleepless night often meant I’d be tired enough to get at least a handful of hours of dreamless, uninterrupted sleep the following night.

But in the week since Salas left my bedroom for good, sleep had become an even rarer treasure than before.

The saying went “Out of sight, out of mind.” I’d hoped that after some time spent without Salas, the image of him walking away into the night would fade in my mind, and the heavy feeling pressing on my chest would lift. I hoped the pull between us would weaken.

Meanwhile, I wanted to learn more about the sores of our world that his story had exposed to me, and I wished to heal them.

He’d made me think. And it wasn’t just about the sensation of his hands on my naked body. Salas had opened my eyes to things I thought I knew but either had been misled about or oblivious to. My new world, my sanctuary, my safe place turned out to be far from safe for men like Salas. It also offered nothing but a bleak future to many children.

The morning before the slaves were supposed to leave Egami Palace, Father and I sat on either side of the cigar display table in his parlor.

An illustrated edition of Equine Breeds of Western Islands lay open between Father and me, with neither of us paying any attention to it. The history book that Father had been reading that morning was already securely hidden under the window seat cushion, just in case anyone walked in on us unexpectedly.

“The orphanage funds are set and approved by the council,” Father said. “The council also breaks the sum down by location. I have nothing to do with it, dear.”

“But you are the main patron,” I argued.

“I am.” Father nodded. “That means I’m always photographed for newspapers during my official visits to the orphanages. I also give speeches during those visits sometimes, when the council requests it.”

“That’s not all, though. You organize the fundraisers. Are you not in charge of the funds raised?”

“No, sweetie. I don’t actually organize them. I just lend my name and sign the thank-you notes for the donors. I have no say in how the money is distributed. The council decides on that.”

I hoped he might at least have some influence on the distribution of charity funds. But it seemed the council firmly held all reins of power in their hands. Just like they held on to all the existing laws on slavery.

I’d managed to put a review of the laws on slavery on the council’s agenda, but Lady Etah insisted on limiting the time for my presentation. I had to cut my speech in half, but frankly, I didn’t think it would’ve made any difference had I delivered the entire speech. The vast majority of the councilors voted against the suggested revisions of the existing laws without even seeing my proposal.

They had allowed me to reduce a slave’s punishment by two lashes before. They had agreed to increase the number of inspections in the widower houses around the country now. But they vehemently opposed any fundamental changes to the existing laws. The power I thought I had turned out to be not much bigger than that of my father. His name was on all those charities, but he had no influence on their administration.

“The distribution of funds for orphanages is massively skewed for the benefit of the girls.” I sighed.

“I know, dearest.” Father ran a hand over his neatly styled hair, making sure not to touch the carefully arranged wave over his forehead. “But is it really a bad thing? Think about it, Ari. Education is wasted on boys.”

“You’re a man, Father. You used to be a boy too. Did you not benefit from education?”

“My main benefit came from marrying your mother. The ability to read helps me combat boredom but not much more. For men of lower classes, education is almost a curse instead of a blessing. You know what they say? Ignorance is bliss. And I’d add, especially when one’s destiny is physical labor, one doesn’t need to be literate to haul rocks.”

Or bricks , as it might be in some cases.

Good education didn’t help Salas to improve his life. Would he have been better off without it? Or maybe the problems in our society were too deep to be solved by fixing just one issue. If we were to educate the boys, we also had to offer them ways to earn a living with their acquired skills and knowledge in the future.

“Educating a girl,” Father continued, “helps her gain employment where she can put her education to good use. She’ll earn a living, take a husband, and have the means to support them both. Meanwhile, boys should direct their efforts toward finding a good wife and being a good husband to her. Don’t you see? If the funds are split evenly, in the long run both groups will suffer. Boys would do better for themselves if they focus all their energy on attracting a suitable wife.”

“What if they fail at that?”

“Then they should try harder,” Father replied, undeterred.

“So, as it stands right now, there is no future for an unmarried man.”

“An unmarried man is a wasted potential. He’s at best useless to our society. At worst, he’s dangerous. A man’s very purpose is to be a husband and a father. His place is at home, taking care of the house and the children, so his wife can work and provide for them.”

“But why is a woman allowed to be so much more than just a mother and a wife when a man is not?” I wouldn’t give up. “Does it seem fair to you?”

Father drew in a long breath, looking ready for a lengthy discussion.

“That’s how it has always been, Ari,” he said, folding his hands on the glass top of the cigar table. “Our society is built through the wisdom of hundreds of generations. Our way of life has withstood the test of time. Look at our gods for guidance. There are only two divine males. Rethaf is the God of Marriage, the husband of the greatest Sun Goddess, and the father of her four children. Her three daughters are the goddesses of War, Peace, and Governance. And her son is Yarnus, the God of Youth and Purity.”

A serene expression relaxed Father’s features as he spoke about the deities, and I didn’t interrupt him.

“Rethaf is a vessel of patience and wisdom,” Father said. “He provides a continuous support to his esteemed wife and is revered as the ideal that all our youth should aspire to. The Goddess’s son Yarnus represents the starting point of every young man’s journey. Looking up to Yarnus, a young boy preserves his purity of both body and soul, saving himself for his future wife. Because only in marriage can he fulfill his life’s purpose as a father and a husband. The life of an unmarried man is wasted for both the gods and the society. His seed, if spilled freely, is an insult to his purpose.”

“Is procreation life’s only goal, Father?” I asked.

“For a man, it is the only one worth achieving. My life was not complete until Goddess sent you to us. I wake up every morning with a prayer of gratitude for her blessing us with a daughter and letting our bloodline continue. Only by becoming a husband and a father, the man earns the highest respect.”

Procreation was important in order for a society to go on. A woman’s choice to remain unmarried would be frowned upon too. If she was a woman of means, she’d be pestered by fathers of young gentlemen to marry one of their sons. But even if she chose to remain single for life, she would not become a pariah in Rorrim’s society. She’d have more options to support herself, too, more chances to avoid the path to poverty that Salas had been pushed onto.

Before I could argue, however, a knock on the door interrupted us.

One of Father’s valets entered, “Your Highness, Her Majesty demands your presence for today’s city report.”

“Now?”

It was too early for the report. Something must’ve happened if the queen wanted it ahead of schedule.

“Sorry, Father.” I gave him a peck on the cheek. “We’ll continue this conversation some other time.”

“Of course, dearest. It’s always a pleasure talking to you.”

ON MY WAY TO MOTHER’S study, I ran into Gem. Her features were pinched into a frown of concentration.

“What’s going on?” I asked.

She darted a cautious look around before speaking quietly, only for me to hear.

“There was a murder in the city last night. A second one. Two murders a week apart.”

Crime in Rorrim was mostly reduced to theft or an occasional fist fight, hardly warranting alerting the queen. A murder happened rarely, usually when a brawl got out of hand. Most of those took place between men and were blamed on the nature of their gender that apparently cursed them with a hefty share of aggression.

Gem’s expression remained somber as we approached the doors to the queen’s study.

“Two women were killed on two separate nights,” she whispered quickly as the guards swung the doors open for us. “Possibly by the same man.”

I worried my lip, stepping over the threshold. Aggression against women was socially and legally unacceptable and was always punished harshly. A murder of a woman was a grievous crime. It had to be thoroughly investigated. But two murders in one week? That was extraordinary. It certainly demanded immediate action from the crown.

Mother was sitting at her writing desk, half-turned in her high-backed armchair to face Madam Trela, the Head of the City Guards. Madam Trela’s social position wasn’t high enough to sit in the presence of the queen. She remained standing, her hands in lacy lilac gloves clamped together in front of her. The fitted jacket of the same lilac color as the gloves hugged her voluptuous figure tightly. The jacket’s flowery print clashed with the orange polka dots of her long skirt so violently, it proved impossible to look at both pieces at once. I chose to focus on her straw hat, instead, which seemed a safer option.

“Your Highness. Lady Chamberlain.” Madam Trela greeted us with a brief bow of her head, the bunch of bright flowers on her hat swayed with the movement.

“It’s a pleasure to see you again, Madam Trela,” I said. “Sadly, the reason for your visit is far from pleasant, I hear.”

The woman sighed. “True, true. I don’t usually come here bringing good news, do I?”

“There was a murder in the city last night,” Mother went straight to the point, filling us in. “A woman was killed. A second woman in... what?” She glanced at Madam Trela. “In seven days, was it?”

“Yes, yes.” The head of the city guards nodded, the flowers on her hat drooping solemnly. “Two murders in seven days. Both victims are women. The first one is Madam Elims, a grocer from the east end of the city. She was murdered not far from the establishment called Sweet Gentlemen.”

“It’s a brothel,” Gem explained.

“Indeed, it is,” Madam Trela confirmed. “Madam Elims was one of their long-time customers. She spent the night with one of their new hires. My patrols found her body early in the morning. She died from seventeen stab wounds.”

I winced, my chest aching as if being stabbed too. Seventeen? Why? This seemed to be a murder for the sake of brutality.

“Who would do such a thing?” I asked quietly.

Gem leaned her shoulder against a wall panel, folding her arms across her chest. “Was the whore with whom this woman spent the night the last person who saw her alive?”

“Yes, he was,” Madam Trela replied. “Unfortunately, he’s nowhere to be found. He’s now our suspect. I personally questioned everyone at the fun house.”

Madam Trela was excellent at her job. Highly intelligent, she possessed an exceptional memory for details. Her reports had always been efficient and on point. If anyone was to get to the root of this crime, it’d be her.

“Has Madam Elims’s family been notified?” Mother asked.

“She didn’t have a family in Egami City, Your Majesty. Madam Elims was childless and unmarried. Her store is now the property of her sister, who lives on the North Coast. We sent a messenger with the sad news to her.” Madam Trela heaved another sigh.

Mother propped an elbow on her desk. “Do you have any ideas on the suspect’s whereabouts?”

The head of the guards shifted her weight to another foot, looking uneasy.

“Not yet, Your Majesty. But we’re doing everything to find him, and we have a few good leads. Last week, my women saw a man who matched the subject’s description. They stopped him near the corner of Green Lane and High Crossing, mere steps from the place where the first body was found just forty minutes later.”

“What’s his description?” Gem asked.

Madam Trela turned to her. “Tall, large. Brown hair and a full beard.”

A chilling tendril of dread slithered down my spine.

“It could be anyone,” I said quickly.

“Maybe, Your Highness.” Madam Trela nodded thoughtfully. “But isn’t it too much of a coincidence for a man with his description to be at that location at that hour? Also, most men in the city are clean shaven nowadays as per the latest fashion.”

Gem chewed on her lip, considering something.

“Most,” she said, “but not all. Did your women question him, Madam Trela?”

“They were about to bring him in for questioning, but a woman intervened.”

“A woman?” Mother exclaimed.

Gem pushed away from the wall, standing to attention in the face of this new information.

My tendril of dread grew to the size of a boa constrictor now, wrapping itself tightly around my chest.

“Yes, Your Majesty. The woman claimed to be his relative, so the guards let him go. Allow me to remind you, it was before the first body was discovered. The guards would’ve been much more vigilant had they known about the murder.”

“That woman could’ve been his accomplice,” Gem noted, her frown deepening.

“Or another victim,” Mother added with concern.

Madam Trela wrung her hands, the flowers on her hat trembling.

“That’s what I fear, Your Majesty. More murders can happen. Predators like that don’t stop on their own. They need to be caught. From what he did to his latest victim...” She winced, tears sparkling in her eyes. “He got a taste for violence, and it’s growing.”

The emotions on Madam Trela’s face were genuine. Though, her anguish and empathy never stopped her from doing her job efficiently and even ruthlessly if required.

Mother rose from her chair. “We need to warn the people of Egami. I’ll have to address the city.”

“I’ll draft the speech for you,” I volunteered, grasping at the chance to be useful.

She nodded. “We need to inform and calm the crowd before the panic spreads. The last thing we need is people living in fear. Or even worse, them taking justice in their own hands. I don’t want mobs of armed women combing the streets and attacking all bearded men.”

“It’s probably best not to mention that detail of his description publicly,” Madam Trela suggested. “A beard is easy enough to shave off, anyway.”

“I know someone who matches that description,” Gem announced, and the blood in my veins ran cold. “Someone who, for a fact, did not spend the evening before the first murder where he was supposed to be.”

“Who?” Mother’s face brightened with hope.

Madam Trela perked up. “Can you give me his name, my lady? We’ll investigate.”

Gem swept the room with her gaze. When it stopped at me, I gave a barely perceptible shake of my head in a silent plea to keep quiet.

“Give me a few hours to complete my inquiry, just to be sure,” Gem spoke to Madam Trela, not releasing my stare from the snare of hers. “I don’t want to cause any trouble to an innocent man by mistake.”

“Of course.” Madam Trela nodded. “We’ll follow our leads meanwhile. And, Your Majesty, I will officially petition you to let us issue a public advisory. We need to keep our people safe. A curfew, too, if you deem so necessary.”

“I don’t think a curfew is desirable at this point,” Mother replied. “I’m afraid it may bring more harm than good. We will go with the advisory for now, and I will bring the matter in front of the council today.”

I had to do something. But what?

Clearly, it was Salas and me that the guards reported seeing that night. It was exactly a week ago that he’d visited the orphanage, and I tagged along as his stalker. The slaves weren’t leaving Egami until tomorrow. After what happened, they would be scrutinized, questioned, and inspected before they’re allowed to leave the city.

I had to warn Salas somehow.

“If you’ll excuse me. I’ll get started on that speech draft.” I moved toward the door.

“I’ll see you at noon, dear.” Mother released me with a wave of her hand. “I’d like for you to come to the city with me today.”

“I will,” I promised.

As I was slipping out of the room, Gem excused herself too.

“I’ll get on with my inquiry right now,” she told Mother, then followed me out into the hallway.

“I’ll see you later,” I quipped and increased my pace, hoping to leave Gem behind.

No such luck. Catching up with me, she seized my arm.

“This way, Your Highness.” She slammed her other hand against the door to her study down the hallway.

The door swung open, and Gem dragged me into the relatively small, sparsely furnished room. The atmosphere here was cold and impersonal. However, most people whom Lady Chamberlain interrogated in here had other things to worry about than the décor.

“Funny how there is a connection to a fun house with these murders.” Gem locked the door, then rounded the room, checking under the heavy oak desk, behind the chair, and outside of the window. Satisfied that no one was hiding to eavesdrop on us, she faced me with her hands on her hips. “Just when I discovered that a certain slave used to work in one too.”

Dread spread through me, turning my insides to ice. I’d asked her to investigate the possible reasons for Salas signing another slave contract. Lady Chamberlain would be terrible at her job if she didn’t eventually discover his past too.

“It was long ago,” I exhaled.

“So, you knew?” She looked at me with deep disappointment. “Yet I didn’t learn about that from you .”

“He’s not doing it anymore.”

Gem scoffed.

“Once a whore is always a whore.” She hurled the word with force, like a stone.

“Gem,” I said in a low voice. “You don’t know him.”

“But I thought I did.” She hid her eyes behind her hand, looking racked by regret. “It was my job to know everything about that man, and I thought I did. I talked to his owner. I verified where his previous contract came from. I checked his history for the past five years. But I didn’t discover this little piece of information until today.” She groaned. “I should’ve dug deeper from the beginning. And you should’ve told me who he was the moment you knew.” I inhaled to argue, but she stopped me by raising a hand. “I know, I know. It’s not your fault, Ari. It’s mine.”

“It’s no one’s fault. There is no need to blame anyone.”

But she wasn’t listening.

“I made a mistake. I allowed that viper into the palace. But I will fix it.”

“What do you mean, Gem? What are you going to do?”

She drew in a breath, standing taller.

“All right . Here is what we are going to do. You,” she pointed a finger at me, stabbing it through the air energetically, “you will keep your mouth shut. You know nothing. No one will be able to identify him for certain as the man who came to your bedroom a few times. I made sure of that.”

“But what are you going to do meanwhile?”

“Me...” She gripped her upper arms, pacing the room. “I have a report from the night guards. They saw him returning to the palace that night, just before the body was found. The report is evidence.”

“But he didn’t do it. He didn’t kill anyone.”

“He could have,” she spoke as if thinking out loud. “I’ll just have to present it to Madam Trela in a way that she’d agree with me. The two murders don’t have to be related. Let her hunt down the killer responsible for the last one. Meanwhile, we’ll execute Salas for the first.”

Her words sliced through my heart like a knife. Gem had the power and the ability to do anything she put her mind to, and her mind was clearly set on annihilating Salas.

“Gem, listen to me!” I yelled, finally getting her attention. “Salas didn’t do it.”

“He’s a fallen man, Ari. His physical urges got the best of him. Clearly, he has no control over them since he used to sell sex for money. He’s aggressive. He’s injured a man already, remember?”

“There were six men, Gem. Six men provoked him by insulting someone he—” I cut myself short, afraid to reveal more than was necessary and make the matters worse.

Thankfully, Gem was too preoccupied with developing her plan to notice my misstep or to push for explanation.

“The point is, he’s violent, as it has been proven,” she continued, “and sexually insatiable, as all whores are. It won’t take much to convince everyone that he’s capable of both rape and murder. Especially since we have witnesses. The guards will recognize him. He wasn’t in his barrack at the time of the murder. I need to talk to the slave owner’s helper. He will be another witness for the crown.”

She spun on her heel, heading for the door in a spur of energy.

“Salas didn’t do it, Gem,” I repeated resolutely.

“You don’t know that for sure,” she dismissed.

“But I do.” I stepped between her and the door, blocking her exit. “I am a witness too. I was the woman who led Salas away from the guards. That night, I went to the city with him. We came back to the palace together, though we walked through the gate separately. I’m in the gate guards’ report, too, if you look closely.”

“Ari.” She shook her head, backing away from me. “You’re not helping here.”

“I’m not going to help you execute an innocent man. Salas is not a murderer, and you knew it before you even started cooking this whole thing up in your head.”

She sighed. “Oh, sweetie. For you and me, it’s not about the murder. Or about the truth. Don’t you understand? He’s a brothel boy, a whore—”

“ Was ,” I corrected, my cheeks burning hot as if she’d slapped me by insulting him.

She waved my correction away. “Regardless, he’s a fallen man, a ruined man. Legally, his only place is in the brothel. But that’s not where he has spent the past seven years, is it? However he obtained that first slave contract, he did so by fraud. Whores can’t leave the fun district without a permit, not even for a night. And he’s been away for seven years now. Do you understand? Either way, he’s a criminal. Every day he’s lived for the past seven years has been a crime. That’s the law.”

“But why?”

I knew that men working in fun houses had to be registered. I was not aware that it was the only occupation they could ever have for the rest of their lives. None of my professors ever mentioned the laws on prostitution. It simply was not a priority of the crown to focus on them or work on improving the lives of those men. Even speaking about them was considered improper. This was another thing about my new world that made sense on the surface but stank with injustice when one poked deeper.

“For public safety,” Gem snapped. “Whores belong to brothels, under the penalty of death if they leave. They’re certainly not allowed anywhere near the palace, not to mention into the bedroom of the crown princess. By not disclosing who he was, he deceived everyone, including you and me. He deserves to be executed, Ari.” She grabbed my shoulders. “Either way, he’s a dead man, rightfully so. The only way we can protect ourselves now is to keep both our names out of it. Which means, he needs to be executed for murder, rather than for vice and treason.”

She said it as if Salas’s death was a decided thing already. All that remained was figuring out the details.

How eager Gem had been to bring Salas into my bedroom earlier, and how much she wished him dead now.

“I can’t let him die,” I said firmly.

“But it is the only way, sweetie. We can’t have our reputation connected to a man like that. He’s committed a crime against the crown. You are the crown. You’re supposed to uphold our laws, not fornicate with a criminal. Think about what would happen if it all came out? If we let him live, sooner or later, the truth about his past will come out. Someone will recognize him. He’s so beneath you, even mentioning his name next to yours will mean your downfall, Ari, can’t you see? Your perfect reputation up until now, your miracle status, your stellar performance in the government, nothing will save you.”

Unbeknownst to him, a noose was tightening around Salas’s throat, and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

“There is no one to recognize him,” I said in desperation. “He left his village when he was twelve. His looks have changed since.”

“He became a criminal, Ari, and a whore. He couldn’t keep it in his pants. He has no one to blame but himself for his poor life choices.”

“He was fourteen!” I exclaimed in anguish. “Fourteen, Gem. He was just a boy when he was ruined by an older woman. How much do you think it was his choice at that age? He started working at the fun house at seventeen because he had nowhere else to go. How long is he supposed to carry that stigma and be punished for a decision he made when he wasn’t even an adult?”

She pursed her lips. The look in her eyes remained hard.

“Don’t believe everything he told you. Men like him are usually very good liars, skilled at telling sob stories to milk sympathy and money out of women. Tell me why did he take you to the city that night? What did he force you to do for him?”

He didn’t “take” me. I followed him. But that wasn’t the point. The reason for Salas’s visit to the orphanage was his business, not mine. I had no right to reveal all his life to Gem. But if I didn’t, would he get to keep his life at all?

“Nothing, Gem. Salas never asked me for anything, not for one fucking thing for himself.” I heaved a breath, running a trembling hand through my hair. “He is a good man. He deserves a chance at happiness, even if he did step off that straight, perfect path that men are expected to follow. Why wouldn’t society give men like him even the slightest chance at redemption?”

“It isn’t hard to stay in line.” Gem flipped her ponytail over her shoulder, then crossed her arms over her chest again. “There are plenty of men who do just fine following that path, but some choose debauchery and self-destruction instead. And no, you can’t blame society for their bad choices. Rorrim’s laws are the most lenient toward men. In many other countries, men are treated much worse. They’re not allowed to leave the house unchaperoned. In some, they can’t show their faces to anyone but their wives. Some countries’ laws demand their genitals be caged or mutilated or both. They get married off before they even hit puberty to women many times their age, sold on open markets like livestock.” She pinched the bridge of her nose. “Trust me, men in Rorrim have it much better than anywhere else in the world. Yet look at how many still take it for granted. Spoiled, ungrateful brats.”

My mind was racing, fervently searching for a solution. My plan to improve life for all slaves had encountered serious obstacles from the council. I hadn’t abandoned it, but it was a long-term solution that required time.

Meanwhile, Salas’s life was in immediate danger. To save him, I had to act now. I couldn’t think about the millions of others. I just had to save this one man.

“There has to be a way,” I muttered to myself.

Gem dropped her hand away from her face.

“I’ll take care of it. All you have to do is keep quiet about everything.”

Gem wasn’t my ally in this case. She couldn’t be because we had different things to protect. I worried about Salas’s life. She feared for her reputation.

“No one can ever know anything about him and you,” she instructed me. “It’d be like he never existed. We won’t even have to pay compensation to the slave owner if he’s charged with murder. The owner knows nothing about you. I was the one who dealt with her. Ugh.”

She gripped her hair. Shiny, brown lines of reflection ran through her skin and dress, mirroring the dark wood of the desk and the wall panels behind her. Lady Chamberlain rarely lost composure to reflect like that. I couldn’t remember ever seeing her do it before. But she was clearly distraught now.

“How could I have allowed this to happen?” she lamented. “That cunning bastard had been at it for years. He managed to deceive even me. I’m risking everything here, Ari. If word about it gets out, I’ll lose it all—my position, my place at court, probably even my title. You and I are the only two people who know the whole truth.” She snapped her eyes to mine again, splaying both hands in the air to emphasize each word. “Just. Keep. Quiet. Please.”

“I will not.” I held her stare as a solution began to form in my head. “Not unless you promise me that Salas won’t get hurt.”

She gasped for air, as if being pulled under by a current stronger than herself.

“Ari. There is nothing I can do for him. I don’t care how good of a fuck he was for you. There will be others just as good or even better. You have to let this one go.”

But I stood my ground.

“I won’t let you throw him to the wolves.”

She smirked. “Well, ‘the wolves’ have to be fed, sweetie. And I’d rather it’s him than you or me. There is no other way.”

“Yes, there is.” I took a step forward, my idea taking shape as I spoke. “You will pay off his debt to the slave owner.”

She laughed. “Haven’t we tried that already? It didn’t work out that well last time, did it?”

“It will this time if you carefully explain to Salas the risks of staying a slave in this current situation.”

Salas couldn’t remain at the mercy of the slave owner who might eventually take him to the parts of the country where he risked being recognized. His situation was much worse than I ever knew. He’d been in mortal risk for years.

Many things made more sense now. How he avoided me at the beginning, trying to remain invisible despite being intrigued by my attention. How adamantly he refused all my offers of help.

Meeting new people while looking for a job as a free man carried a risk of exposure. As a slave, few paid attention to him, making his current occupation a better hiding place. But it was not good enough. If anyone recognized him, he’d be executed. On his own, he stood no chance to defend himself from the law. To protect him, I had to keep him close.

“The queen will never agree to freeing him again,” Gem pointed out.

“She won’t. But we don’t really need her permission. We’ll find the money.”

I had a generous allowance from the crown, and every piece of jewelry I owned could feed a man for months. But my expenses were carefully monitored. Selling royal jewelry would not go unnoticed. A large withdrawal of funds would raise questions and might bring unwanted attention to Salas.

“Where will we find the money?” Gem demanded.

“I’ll give you as much as I can without attracting scrutiny or speculations. You will come up with the rest.”

“Me?” She almost choked on the word.

“Yes, Gem. You have an annual allowance from your family. In addition, the crown pays you handsomely for all the work you do for us. I’m sure you can work out an arrangement to free a slave, and I will repay you in time. Unlike me, you can do all this far more discreetly.”

“Why the fuck would I free him?” she yelled.

“To keep him quiet about where your people brought him for three nights. To keep me quiet about it too.”

Her eyes opened wide with shock. “You wouldn’t dare, Ari. This is blackmail. One that won’t work. You can’t speak about it without exposing yourself along with me.”

“But was any of it my fault?” I said in an exaggeratedly sweet voice and batted my eyelashes at her. “I am just an innocent princess who did what her mother told her to do. The queen trusted you to make the arrangements. And you failed us both, putting my life in danger.”

Gem glared at me, her stare burrowing through me like a spear.

“Sometimes, I really wish you stopped being a princess just long enough for me to slap you,” she gritted through her teeth. “What do you want me to do with him after I free him? Hide him somewhere? You know he won’t be able to support himself. The moment we free him, he’ll sign another contract and end up where he started.” She moaned as if being tortured. “He really should just go back to a fun house where he belongs. With any luck, he’d get killed in a brawl or something.”

Salas had made it clear he preferred the back-breaking labor of a slave to the work in a fun house. He’d been risking his life daily to stay away from his former occupation. Forcing him back would be a huge betrayal of his trust.

But I needed to keep him in Egami. I had to watch over him from now on.

“I want him to stay in the city.”

Gem blew out a laugh. “Are you going to rent him a place? Because sooner or later, someone will discover who pays for his accommodation. And no,” she stomped her foot, “I’m not financing that shit for you indefinitely.”

“No. Salas will never agree to being a kept man.”

As kind and agreeable as Salas was with me, he had a stubborn streak. Unshakable pride was at his core, the inner dignity that no punches of fate had managed to crack or weaken. He wouldn’t accept handouts. I’d learned that already.

“Well, then he has more sense than you do.” Gem walked away from me and propped her butt on the desk behind her.

“He needs a chance to make his own living,” I said.

“And how do you propose he’d do it, other than taking his pants off for everyone who pays?”

I let that insult slide, holding on to the idea that churned and evolved inside my brain.

“Here is what I want you to do, Gem.” I headed toward her. “I want you to talk to the games master. You’ll tell her that you want to put a word in for a new gladiator you’ve found.”

“I... what?” she squeaked, making a move to jump up from the desk, but I pressed down on her shoulders, keeping her butt on the edge.

In my desperation to save Salas, my thoughts on this might be flawed. But Mother’s gladiators were well taken care of. They got paid well, ate good food, had free access to the queendom’s best healing witches if needed. They lived in their own apartments in the gladiators’ quarters, away from the city crowds. At Salas’s age, he wouldn’t perform in the arena for long. In a few years, he’d have a full pension from the crown that would allow him to live the rest of his life in dignity and peace.

Also, he’d be right here, in Egami, a short carriage ride away from the palace.

I held Gem down, making her listen to every word I said. “You’ll tell the games master that Salas fought alone against six men and won. You’ll tell her you’ve made inquiries into his background, and his past is clean.”

“But—”

“You’ll tell her,” I wouldn’t let her squeeze a word of protest in, “that you personally vouch for him and give him your recommendation to become one of Her Majesty’s royal gladiators.”

Gem released a long, tortured moan as if I was slowly twisting her arm out of its socket.

“You are insane, Ari.” She dropped her face into her hands.

I didn’t argue with that. It was insane. A crazy, daring plan based on lies. And if the lies were exposed, none of us would get out of it unscathed. But the queen’s gladiators enjoyed care, protection, and respect no other group of unmarried men in Rorrim had. And I wanted Salas to have it all.

“There are only three people who know the truth—you, me, and Salas. All three of us have very good reasons to keep it to ourselves. It will work,” I assured her.

She lifted her head, looking at me like I’d completely lost my mind.

“The men who become Her Majesty’s royal gladiators have impeccable reputations.”

“Do they really?” I arched an eyebrow. “Or are their reputations only as good as the references they receive from powerful women?”

She made a face, as if I was feeding her the sourest lemons straight up. “Think about it, Ari. You want me to pass a whore for a warrior. It’s impossible. The games master will see right through it the moment she meets him.”

I shook my head at that.

“Salas is a warrior. He’s fought more battles in his life than you could ever imagine. He’s a survivor, and he’s gotten through it all while keeping his kindness and integrity intact, which is more than I can say about many people here in the royal palace. What he needs is a chance. A word in his favor from the powerful lady chamberlain, the favorite niece of Her Majesty, would surely convince the games master to give him that chance.”

Gem tilted her head, squinting at me from her perch on the desk.

“And if he refuses to take this chance?”

I rubbed my chest against a stab of worry. “He certainly has the right to refuse.”

“Well, there you go!” She tossed her hands in the air. “I’ll stick my neck out for him, and it’ll be all for nothing. He’d be stupid to miss out on such an opportunity, but we established already that man isn’t bright. When we paid off his last debt, he was dumb enough to trip and fall right back into another one. He clearly has no clue what’s best for him. They say he doesn’t even reflect . Ever. Clearly, he feels no shame and no fear, like an animal.”

But Salas did reflect . I’d seen it. Only it wasn’t pain or humiliation that scared him. It was me and what I made him feel.

“He has to have a choice,” I insisted. “Ultimately, it needs to be his decision. I want you to explain what’s going on, without pushing or coercing him either way. Do you understand?”

“Ah so,” she said slyly. “You don’t want me to do to him what you’re doing to me? It’s fine to coerce me, but not the slave.”

I felt a slight pinch of guilt about forcing Gem into compliance, but it remained just slight.

“It’s not the same, Gem. You’re only risking your status. In Salas’s case, his life is at stake. You will lay it out to him as is. Then, you’ll give him a choice. If he doesn't accept our offer, you’ll let him go. Either way, we’ll have Madam Trela hunt the real killer without distractions. But if Salas refuses your help, I’d like to speak with him before he leaves Egami.”

“No, you won’t!” Gem jumped to her feet. “If I do this, Ari, if I put my wealth and status on the line for a worthless whore, there is one thing I absolutely demand of you. You will never speak to that man ever again.”

“But if he refuses, I need to hear his reasons why.”

If I were completely honest with myself, I wished to see Salas just one more time if he chose to leave the city and my life for good.

But I’d already broken my promise to Mother not to see him after the last night Gem had arranged for him to come to my room. I’d promised her not to associate with him anymore, but then went to the slaves’ barracks anyway.

Gem was right to doubt me. When it came to Salas, I had no willpower to resist his pull, even if my honor was at stake.

Gem gave me a knowing look. “There is absolutely no need for you to know the reasons for his refusal. If you’re giving him a choice, it’s not up to you what he chooses. If he wants to slave his life away, let him. Respect his decision and let him go. And if he takes this chance,” she lifted a finger for emphasis, “then you won’t search out his company either. I don’t give a fuck about how much you care about him or how much you may miss him.”

“But I’m not—”

She huffed, cutting off my protests. “You made a huge mistake, Ari. He was supposed to be a nobody, a fleck in your memories, a toy for you to use for a night or two. And look where we are now. You’re blackmailing me and lying for him. And all for what? A whore is not a gladiator, even if you dress him up as one. He’ll get himself killed during his first fight in the arena. Which will probably be the best outcome for all of us.” Looking bitter and disappointed, she demanded, “Swear you’re not going to see him one on one ever again. No talking. No fucking. From now on, you don’t know him at all.”

I wasn’t doing this for me. It wasn’t my intention to keep Salas close as a lover. I simply wished to save his life and give him a chance at a better future.

“All right,” I said. “I won’t seek him out.”

Gem didn’t appear pacified, however. The bitterness in her eyes shifted to pity.

“Do you realize what you’ve condemned yourself to, Ari? You obviously care about this man. Now, you risk seeing him regularly during the Games. If he becomes a gladiator, you won’t be able to avoid it. You’ll watch him in the arena, but you’ll be married to someone else. Do you think you have what it takes to keep your promise?”

‘Out of sight, out of mind’ would no longer protect me in that case. But it wasn’t about me.

I stepped aside, leaning with my hip against the desk that Gem had vacated.

“I don’t have a choice, do I? As long as Salas is safe, I’ll manage.”

She heaved a sigh, heading to the door.

“Let yourself out whenever you will, Your Highness. Now please excuse me, I have to sweet-talk the games master into accepting into her team someone she absolutely should not.”