Chapter 21

21

KANNON

B y the time we wrapped up for the day, my muscles burned like hell. My shirt was stuck to my skin with sweat and my mood was as sour as it had been this morning when Merritt bolted.

I didn’t know what I had expected when I showed up. Maybe to find her in the kitchen with her hair messy and a smug little smile on her face. I thought there might be a little flirting. Perhaps a stolen kiss or two.

Instead, she had sped away in a cloud of dust, leaving nothing behind except a hollow feeling I couldn’t shake. I saw her burn rubber down the street. I know she saw me. She drove away from me like the hounds of hell were chasing her.

I had pretty much mastered the art of the one-night stand and quick escapes. I had encountered the occasional jealous husband and boyfriend. And in all that time, I could honestly say I had never run out the door or had anyone run out on me.

Last night when she asked me to leave, I should have known something was off. Again, that had been a new one for me.

I spent the night tossing and turning, my mind spinning through endless scenarios of why. Maybe it was something I said. Maybe she was just testing me. Maybe she didn’t want me at all.

One thing was for sure—if I’d known the morning would bring such turmoil, I wouldn’t have walked away so easily. I would’ve asked questions, tried to understand.

I definitely wouldn’t have stopped the sex. I didn’t regret it. That had been something I wanted for too long to regret it. I hated to think she might be pissed at me, though.

Something about Merritt unbalanced me in a way that no woman had before, including my wife. I wasn’t ready to just let it go. I needed her to talk to me. Explain what the fuck was happening.

I hated the fact I had spent the day checking my phone like some lovesick idiot, hoping she would text or call. She hadn’t. And why would she?

I assumed she was at the cafe working. Maybe she wasn’t calling or texting because she was caught up in a meeting or something. That made sense. I considered going to the cafe under the guise of getting lunch for the guys, but she would see right through that. And if she wanted space, I would give it to her.

I told myself to let it go. I didn’t want to think of her as another one-nighter, but maybe that was all she wanted from me.

I had managed to get through the last ten years without her, even though her absence gnawed at me constantly. Then last night happened, and suddenly, I was right back to where I’d been at eighteen—drowning in her.

“Fuck,” I muttered under my breath as I flung my phone onto the kitchen counter. It clattered loudly, making a couple of the guys glance over before quickly looking away. I had brought on some of my part-time guys to try and get the job done quicker. I was taking a huge loss on the job, but I was doing this as a personal favor to Gary and Merritt.

The guys knew better than to stick around when I got in a mood. One by one, they made themselves scarce until I was left alone with my thoughts, which was the last thing I wanted.

I was done for the day. “Pack up,” I said to Luke. “We’re done.”

“What’s going on?” Luke asked.

“Just pack up,” I repeated, too tired to disguise the frustration in my voice.

“You’ve got a stick up your ass today.”

“Yeah, I do. Want me to pull it out and beat your ass with it?”

He chuckled. “You only get like this when you’ve got girl problems or you lost a lot of money. I think I know which one it is. Trouble in paradise?”

“Something like that,” I said.

Luke hesitated for a moment but then nodded, “Alright, man. I’ll leave you alone. But I’m here if you need to vent.” He put his tools away without another word.

As one of my closest friends and most loyal employees, he knew there were days when I wouldn’t open up, no matter how much prodding. There wasn’t a lot of soul-bearing conversations at our work sites, either.

Once everyone had left the house for the day, I tidied up a bit before I walked out into the gray afternoon. Grabbing my helmet, I swung a leg over my bike and started it up, the deep growl of the engine soothing my nerves a little. There was only one way to clear my head: riding fast enough to leave everything behind, even if just for a while. Maybe one day, I’d find the bike’s limit. Or my own.

It was a gamble, but right then, I didn’t care. I was going to hit the road and just go. I didn’t know where, but I was going to get there fast. I revved the engine a couple more times.

Just as I was about to back out of the driveway and give my guardian angel a real test, I saw the rental car coming down the road. She pulled in beside me.

I waited to see if she was going to run into the house and ignore me again. She climbed out of the car. My stomach twisted watching her clutch her laptop bag like it was some kind of shield.

She looked nervous—skittish, even. Like she was one wrong move away from darting back into her car and taking off again. When she didn’t take off running for the front door, I assumed she was ready to talk. I killed the engine and pulled off my helmet, leaning on the bike as she approached cautiously.

“Hey,” she said softly, stopping a few feet away.

“Hey.”

There was an uncomfortable silence. I wasn’t the one to run. If she had something to say, I was all ears.

“I’m sorry I left like that this morning,” she blurted out. “I freaked out.”

I crossed my arms, studying her. “Why?”

Her teeth nervously nibbled at her bottom lip. She shifted her bag to the other shoulder. “I didn’t know how to face you. Or your crew. It just… it felt weird, and I panicked. After, you know…”

“Sex, Merritt. We had sex. I don’t think we did anything wrong.”

“I know, it’s just, I don’t know. I didn’t know how to handle it.”

I exhaled. Some of the tension I’d been carrying all day eased. “That makes sense.”

Her shoulders relaxed a little. She gave me a tentative smile. “I know it probably didn’t feel great from your perspective, though. I want to make it up to you. Can I make you dinner?”

“Dinner?” I raised an eyebrow. “You don’t have shit in that kitchen.”

“I thought I would test the new oven,” she said with a smile.

It wasn’t like I had any real plans. And I wanted to spend time with her. “Okay.”

She walked back to the car and pulled out a bag full of groceries, holding it up with a small, sheepish grin. Another bag had what looked to be a couple of pans. “I remembered how much you used to drool when I’d invite you over on nights my dad made his chicken alfredo. I figured maybe I could recreate it. You know, cheesy carbs, food coma, the works.”

Damn her. Just hearing her talk about it had my mouth watering. “You came prepared.”

“I’m nothing if not determined.” Her grin widened, and I couldn’t help but smile back.

“Alright,” I said, pushing off the bike. “You’re lucky I’m hungry.”

We carried the groceries inside. She wasted no time putting me to work. “Here,” she said, handing me a knife. “Start chopping onions.”

“You only invited me in so I could do your dirty work, didn’t you?” I teased, but I grabbed the onion and got to it.

She threw a wink over her shoulder as she turned back to the stove. “Caught me.”

That wink damn near killed me. Watching her move around the kitchen was sparking a new fantasy I didn’t know was my thing. I would pay good money to see her wearing an apron and nothing else.

Her sleeves were pushed up, her hair clipped in a messy knot on top of her head, with a few loose strands framing her face. She looked so natural, so effortlessly beautiful, it made my chest ache.

She caught me staring as she stirred something in a pan, her lips curving into a soft smile. “Everything okay?”

I nodded, swallowing hard. “More than okay.”

We worked together like we always had, falling into a rhythm that felt easy and familiar. Once everything was in the oven, she unclipped her hair, letting it tumble down around her shoulders, and poured us each a glass of wine.

“We’ve got about half an hour while that cooks,” she said, handing me a glass. “I was hoping we could sit and talk.”

“Talk?” I raised an eyebrow, following her into the living room. Sheets covered the sofa she just bought, giving the place a half-finished feel. “What do you want to talk about? Last night?” I gave her a teasing wink.

Her cheeks flushed a pretty red. She stammered for a second before shaking her head. “No, that’s… not what I want to talk about.”

“Shame,” I said, smirking as I sat in one of the folding chairs.

She sat down in the other chair. She smoothed her hands over her thighs. “I, um, I went to see Riggs today.”

That caught me off guard. “I didn’t take you for a day drinker,” I said with a laugh.

“I’m not. Although he did make me a very tasty, spicy Bloody Mary.”

I nodded. “He does that.”

“I went there because I wanted to talk to him,” she said.

The way she said it told me there was something I was missing. My smirk dropped, and I straightened. “Why did you need to talk to Riggs?”

She hesitated, looking down at her wine glass. “I asked him about you.”

“Me?”

I could already tell I wasn’t going to like what was coming. I took a drink from my glass and tried to calm myself.

“Yes,” she said with a smile.

“Why would you need to talk to Riggs about me?”

She took another drink. She was acting way too nervous for this to be just a normal conversation. “I wanted to ask him about what’s happened while I’ve been gone.”

My jaw clenched. “What the hell are you and Riggs doing talking about me? Why would you go behind my back? If you’ve got questions about me, just ask me . I don’t appreciate gossip.”

Her head snapped up, her eyes narrowing. “Don’t get defensive. I just wanted to understand.”

“Understand what?” I asked.

“You.”

“What about me?”

“Kannon, you’re different,” she said softly.

“ You’re different,” I shot back. “We’re ten years older than the last time we saw each other. So, yeah, we’re both different.”

“He told me you were married. Is there a reason you didn’t want to tell me about that?”

A bitter laugh escaped me. I ran a hand through my hair. “Of course he did.”

“Kannon,” she said softly, leaning forward. “I’m not asking to pry. I just… I didn’t know. It feels like a pretty big thing to leave out.”

“You think?” I snapped before I could stop myself. She looked taken aback. I immediately felt like an ass. “Look, it’s not something I talk about. Ever.”