Chapter 2

Doc – Four Years Later

I side-eyeKen from where I"m standing at the nurse"s desk, filling in the discharge papers for my patient, waiting for her to finish her conversation.

She"s been working at the hospital for a few years now, and fuck was I happy when Breaker gathered everyone to tell us that. We have lunch together nearly every fucking day we"re on same shift together, and I"m struggling to control my feelings.

We"ve gotten closer, which pissed Lola off, but I don"t give a shit; I need this woman like I need air to breathe. Before, I could handle it, I"d fuck someone to get my mind off her or at least try, but now that I"m with her every day, my skin fucking itches when I'm not near her.

I watch as she nods at Claudia, the Director of Nursing, who hates nearly everyone except Ken. The woman is in her late forties, and runs a tight ship.

Every nurse and doctor are scared shitless of her.

I turn, seeing Ken"s body tense a little, and I lean against the desk, watching her. She nods at Claudia, who speaks firmly, before she pats Ken"s shoulder and walks away, all while my girl stands there looking shocked. I push off the desk and walk over to her, my eyes taking her in.

Fuck, she looks sexy in royal blue scrubs. Her tits stretch the top nicely, making my cock swell, but I try and ignore it as I wrap my arm around her shoulders, loving the feel of her against me.

Her head turns to me, her dark green eyes wide, and I raise a brow and ask, "What'cha do to anger the dragon?"

She elbows my ribs at Claudia"s nickname, making me chuckle. Then she wraps her arm around my back, placing her head on my chest, and mumbles, "She thinks I"m suited for the neonatal intensive care ward. She wants me to join their team and work alongside them; apparently, they"ve just put together a program with Manhattan General specifically for that. Then I can take my neonatal certification exam."

I pull back from her, gripping her shoulders as pride takes over. "That"s amazing news, Pixie." I pull her to me for a hug. "I"m so proud of you."

She squeezes me tightly, and murmurs, "But I don"t know if I"m good enough. They are teeny tiny babies, Doc."

I pull back a little, trying to ignore how dirty my road name sounds coming from her beautiful mouth. Her arms stay around my waist as she looks up at me, her chin on my chest.

Fuck, if I leaned down just a little bit…. My eyes go to her lips, and I clear my throat, giving her a small smile as I squeeze her once, then pull back, trying to control myself, knowing she doesn"t see me that way. However, she"s been touchier with me the past year, or my head is just imagining it, which wouldn"t surprise me.

"I couldn"t think of anyone better for that job. You are kind and caring, and Breaker mentioned this is your dream."

She smiles at the mention of Breaker, and I have to keep the anger I feel boiling in my blood under wraps. I hate that I mentioned him. Those two are very fucking close, and I don"t like it; I fucking hate it, and my jealousy rises every time I see them together. Every time I see her come out of his room in the morning, I fucking explode. Tech, our treasurer, usually grabs me and takes me to the ring in the club"s basement. He"s a good fighter, and it helps me.

Every. Fucking. Time.

She sighs. "I guess I"m scared of messing up."

I half smile at her as my pager goes off. I check it and see I"m being paged to the E.R. I have to swallow hard, wondering if I"m making the right decision here.

I lean forward, give Ken a kiss on her head, and rasp, "You will be great. I can promise you now, I couldn"t imagine anyone else for a job like that other than you." I pull back as she grins wide at me, making her whole face light up, before my pager goes off again. I sigh, checking it again to see it"s the ER again. I clear my throat and shake the pager.

"It"s the ER, my uh…." Fuck, I hate that I"m saying this. "The girl I"m seeing is here, it"s what I needed to speak to you about. I…uh, can"t do lunch today."

The words feel fucking horrible in my mouth.

She clears her throat and asks, "You"re seeing someone?"

I swallow hard and nod. "Yeah, we"ve been on a few dates. It"s uh Prue, well, Starlight from the club."

She flinches, and I furrow my brows. Is that pain in her eyes?

As soon as I swear I see the emotion, it's gone, and she gives me a smile and whispers, "I"m happy for you, Doc. Alex mentioned she"s had her eyes on you. Just, uh, be careful…."

I swallow hard but give her a nod, knowing her concerns. A clubwhore tried to trap Breaker. He raises his son alone while Jingles cleans the club, and the brothers no longer touch her. He wants his son to know his other half, but she doesn"t care about the kid. She"s fucking bitter because she didn"t get Breaker's patch, just like Tats's birth momma, Snatch.

I lean forward to kiss her forehead again, but she steps back, confusing me. She just smiles.

"I, uh, I"ve got to go call Alex about this NICU thing."

Jealousy shoots through me, jealousy I don"t deserve to feel.

Why in the fuck does she call him his legal name?

With my heart clutched in her hands, she leaves, and my pager goes off again, making me growl. I wish I never fucking agreed to give Prue a chance. It was a bad fucking day; I"d lost a patient, Lola had fucked a married fucking man, causing the wife to hit Shelly, Breaker"s momma.

I just wanted my girl, but she"s not mine, though, is she?

I swear my mind keeps playing tricks on me, though; I think she feels something for me, that there"s longing and pain in those beautiful eyes of hers. I always wish it was true.

I shake my head and go toward the elevator, wondering how in the fuck I let Prue convince me dating would work. The few dates we have had were fucking hell. The only good thing was leaving at the end of each one. I made a big mistake and fucked her after the second date, after seeing Kennedy on the other side of the street with some guy. I regretted it immediately, and I haven"t touched her since. Fuck, I haven"t touched any girl since, and even before then, it was at least a year and a half. Again, it was after I saw Kennedy with someone else, only for it to be fucking nothing.

I run a hand through my hair. Fuck, I need to squash these feelings; she doesn"t have the same feelings as me. I"m just her best friend"s brother.

Yeah, who am I kidding, that"s never going to happen, I"m going to love this girl until I fucking die. When I was twenty-one, I had Tats tattoo her name on my neck. My dad knows, but no one else has noticed yet. It helps that I have other tattoos around it, but a part of me wishes she"d notice it so I could finally open up to her.

I gently rub her name as I press the button for the first floor.

I need to try with Prue; I just, I fucking need to. This feeling like I"m fucking dying every day, it"s consuming me. I"ve known Prue since high school, and I know she"s a fucking patch chaser, but I thought maybe she had changed, you know, give her a chance and hopefully help me move on….

A few hours later, I"m hanging my white coat up, completely fed up. Lunch with Prue fucking sucked. All she could do was go on about herself, wanting a fucking boob job but needing the funds for it, which she kept hinting for me to pay after only three fucking dates. Then she kept hinting at wanting to go to a supply room for a quick fuck, but I refused to fucking touch her again. I couldn"t. My mind is constantly on Kennedy, and now it fucking feels like I"m cheating on her, even though she"s not fucking mine.

I was willing to try a few dates, but that"s it. The thought of touching another girl makes me feel sick. But now, I, fuck….

I need her.

I sigh as my phone goes off, and I fucking pray it"s not Prue again. She"s already texted several times about planning another date.

I look at the screen, but instead of frowning, I half smile. I answer, "Hey, Dad."

"Hey, kid," he says, and I chuckle.

"I"ve just turned thirty; I"m no longer a kid, dad."

He hums and replies, "To me, you"ll always be my kid."

I smile at that as I shut my locker. My dad is fucking amazing. He"s been a single parent since my sister was born and our mother ran off with a boy toy. The bitch trapped my dad with me after a one-night stand, and he stood by her but refused to touch her again, but then she spiked his drink, and Lola was conceived, the paternity tests proving we were both his. When he still refused to give her nothing more than a small apartment, ensuring he had full custody of us, she bailed with a guy half her fucking age.

Good riddance, as far as I"m concerned.

"I called to see if you"d come to dinner tonight. I need a fucking buffer, son; Breaker is out on club business."

I sigh. "Dad, we need to put Lola in her place. Her attitude toward Shell is fucking disgusting, and I hate that Shell sits back and allows it."

"I know, son, believe me, I know. Breaker is ready to explode," he replies.

My sister has a thing for Breaker, but he has never seen her that way. She made the shit up in her head and decided she deserved him because she got everything that she wanted, being a club brat. But when Dad and Shell got together, gone was a relationship like mother and daughter, even though Shell was the person Lola confided in as a kid. Now, Lola's a major bitch, treating Shell like a piece of shit on her shoe.

She used to blame me for why Breaker didn"t want her, now she blames Shell.

"I"ll be there, but Dad, if she starts on Shelly, the littlest of remarks, I swear I"ll fucking snap. Shell has done everything for her, and now she"s made you happy. Despite losing Bullet to cancer, she"s opened her heart up to new love; she doesn"t deserve this treatment. We both know you two eloped for a reason. Lola is that reason." I'm fed up with my sister's behavior.

My dad sighs. "Thanks, kid. I just, fuck…. I love your sister, I do, but I"m close to kicking her out. I can see my woman struggling with the tension, and if I lose Shell because of her, I"ll lose my fucking self. I put my feelings on the back burner for years. Bullet knew I had feelings for his woman; I had eyes on her first, but he also knew I respected him. I backed off when I found out about you, and she fell for him. Before he died, he begged me not to hold back any longer, because he could see the love I had for her. I respected him and his wishes, and I won"t lose her a second time. I just fucking can"t."

I swallow…. Fuck, I never knew my dad wanted her first.

Fuck.

I shake my head, grab my bag, and state, "I"m now on my way. Tell Shell I"m starving."

He chuckles before thanking me, and then hanging up. On my way out, I notice Kennedy near the exit, and I stop for a second just so I can watch her like a creeper.

I watch as she smiles at a few nurses before grinning, and that"s when I see Sniper, our prez Snake's, blood brother and her second best friend, my sister being her first. He grins and hugs her, making me swallow a growl. I hate their relationship, even though it"s been a brother-and-sister one since second grade. They both leave, and I sigh, wishing she was coming home with me on the back of my bike, where she belongs.

Fuck, I hate this pain I feel every day without her near me.

"Hey, Doc…" a voice to my right whispers, and I turn to see Becky, the nurse who just won"t take the hint. She"s another patch chaser and wants a brother. Any would do, but she has her sights set on me.

She"s let her very bad blonde dye job hair down, and she"s biting her bottom lip.

I shake my head, stating, "Sorry, got things to do," as I walk away, ready to ensure my sister doesn"t hurt a woman I see as a mother, all while my mind is on the girl I know I can"t have but want.

I head out to door and ignore the outraged cry from the silly woman behind me.

Fuck my life.