Chapter 13

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

I didn’t trust the look in Darian’s eyes when he reached into the water and lifted my foot out.

“Look at these toes, Daemon,” he said, washing them. “They’re so adorable that I could eat them up.”

He kissed my big toe then shocked me by running his tongue along the side of it. My center clenched around nothing and cramped slightly. I jerked my foot free in response, but he recaptured it quickly and continued washing.

“It was just a little taste, Princess,” he said. “Not even the nibble I wanted.”

Daemon lifted my hand. “I find her teasing little fingers tempting, myself, brother.”

He nipped the pad of one. Instead of trying to take it back, I splashed him with my free hand.

“Ah, you wish my shirt off as well, I see.”

I opened my mouth to correct his assumption, but my words turned into a gasp at the feel of Darian’s mouth closing over my toe. He hummed as his tongue swirled around it.

“There,” Daemon said, pressing my hand to his suddenly bare chest. “Is this better, Lamb?”

The pair of them were assaulting my senses, leaving me no time to react—only to feel.

“Hmm,” Darian said, releasing my toe. “I think I need to taste her ankle.”

He washed and kissed his way down my leg while Daemon washed and kissed his way up my arm. When Daemon’s cloth swiped over my breast, I closed my eyes and gave myself over to their playful care.

“Sweet Princess,” Darian said softly. He kissed my knee and ran his hand up my thigh as Daemon’s tongue swirled around my nipple.

As Daemon sucked the tender peak into his mouth, his brother’s fingers parted my folds. My hips moved to welcome his circling touch around the place they all seemed to know enjoyed their petting the most.

Their desire for me grew, feeding the pleasure I found in each kiss, lick, and stroke. When Darian’s hand nudged my legs wider, I let them fall open for him. He mumbled something about tasting that I couldn’t hear over the sound of my pulse pounding in my ears.

Daemon’s mouth left my chest with a pop. “Patience, brother, lest you find yourself flying around the room.”

I sank my fingers into Daemon’s hair and drew him back to my chest. He chuckled as he obliged.

Darian’s circling fingers dipped lower to my opening, and I tensed. Darian made a frustrated sound and returned to the little nub he’d abandoned to pluck it. Bolts of pleasure shot through me, building pressure.

“Daemon,” I murmured, tugging at his hair. He lifted his mouth and welcomed my hungry kiss.

Darian’s plucking continued at the same time I felt another finger tease my opening. His excitement fed mine, and I broke apart as he slowly slid the digit into my spasming center. Daemon swallowed my cry and held me as wave after wave of pleasure washed through me.

When I stopped twitching, he kissed me sweetly and pulled back to brush my hair from my face.

“There,” Daemon said. “Do you feel more relaxed?”

As he spoke, Darian unhurriedly worked his finger farther into me. Once he reached the hilt, he withdrew it and did it again, setting off another round of minor spasms that felt quite pleasant. So I nodded.

Daemon continued to pat my hair, supporting me with his arm and kissing my nose and cheeks as Darian took his time stroking me from the inside.

“Princess, the water’s growing cold,” Daemon said softly.

It roused me enough to realize they would keep me in the bath all day if I allowed it. With a sigh, I lifted my head and kissed Daemon’s cheek.

“Thank you for bathing me. It was quite enjoyable.” I looked at Darian. “Will you remove your finger, or will I be forced to walk with you crouched under my skirts?”

He threw his head back and laughed. His finger slid free and petted my folds before withdrawing completely.

“Under your skirts is where I long to be,” he said. “But I will wait for a more convenient time. I believe Garron is waiting for you outside. We’ll leave you to finish alone…unless you wish for more help.”

I shook my head. “Go. I will be out soon.”

Since I hadn’t washed my hair, it took less time for me to finish and dress. I glanced at the water in the tub. They’d hauled the water from the well for me twice in two days now. Other than brewing their healing tea, I did very little to assist in their daily tasks.

Not wanting to add to their burdens, I focused on the water, feeling its energy. The impurities were easy to find now. Rather than lifting them, I absorbed their energy—all of it—until they disappeared completely. Then, I did the same with the water. The new energy settled into my well, melding with what was already there–not increasing it, simply merging with it.

Satisfied with my efforts to help, I joined Garron outside.

“Would you like to try again?” he asked. “I promise to follow your lead and not push for more than you’re willing to attempt.”

“No, Garron, I need you to push. I apologize for yesterday and promise not to lose my temper again. Are you well?”

“I’m well. I promise.”

With a small smile, he took my hand to lead me to the garden where I spent another frustrating hour attempting to grow a thorn on a pea plant.

“It would be easier to grow a pea on a bramble at this point,” I said, crossing my arms in irritation.

“Then let’s try that,” Garron said. “I’ll be right back.”

He disappeared around the cottage and returned several minutes later with a piece of thorn-covered bramble, which he poked into the ground at my feet.

With barely a brush of my energy, I rooted it and watched it grow. I allowed its trunk to thicken but suppressed any offshoots, holding the energy back. The plant was brimming with the need to use the excess energy it stored.

I focused on the pea plant beside it, feeling the energy of the bloom. Clearing my mind of everything else but that pea bloom, I touched the bramble with my energy once more and whispered to it in my mind.

Be more than you are. Be what I need.

I watched a small bud burst out from the thick stem of the bramble. Then another and another. They bloomed and grew into pods in seconds. I didn’t stop there. I turned to the pea plant and touched it with the same intent—to make it more than what it was. To make it what I needed.

Thin thorns erupted from the vines.

Smiling, I looked at Garron. Awe reflected in his gaze as he looked at the plants.

“You truly are incredible, Snow,” he said. “Well done.”

“Thank you.”

We didn’t stop at pea pods on bramble or thorns on the pea plants. He pressed me to try more, watching me closely for any signs of fatigue.

By dusk, I could change a rock to soil and soil to water.

I yawned continuously as Eadric fed me and leaned into Brandle’s comforting hold.

Liam walked me to the privy and playfully washed my hands for me, claiming I was too tired for such work. I didn’t contradict him. The day’s effort had seemed to drain me. Yet, when I checked the well, the energy within seemed the same.

“Come, Love. Let’s put you to bed.”

After guiding me to the cottage, he helped me undress then handed me to Edmund, who rebraided my hair and kissed my forehead.

“Sleep soundly, Trouble. You’ve earned it.”

Nodding, I lay down on the mattress and listened to them clean up our dinner. I never felt who settled in next to me.

I woke on Liam’s chest with his hand gently stroking my hair. Outside, I heard the low murmur of conversation.

Rather than opening my eyes, I opened my senses. Dawn had passed several hours ago. Another spring storm was on its way. The trackers were oddly subdued, with no immediate intent to attack.

Eadric was still hungry. Edmund was bored and annoyed. Garron was worried he’d pushed me too far. Daemon slept, and Darian was thinking of tipping him out of his bed. Liam wanted me to continue moving my fingers against his skin. And Brandle was worried about…so much.

I turned my head to kiss Liam’s bare chest.

“Thank you for holding me. I slept well.”

“It was my pleasure.” He kissed my temple. “We have another bath waiting for you.”

I nodded and stroked my fingers over his side like he’d wanted before easing away with a stretch.

“Are you feeling well?” he asked, watching me.

“I have some light pains, which are normal with my monthlies,” I said. “Those will pass, though.”

“Nothing else?”

“Should there be?” I asked, sitting up. He moved with me, and I gazed at the expanse of his exposed chest.

He chuckled and shook his head. “No. We’re just worried that you pushed yourself too far yesterday.”

“Unless you see my hair greying, I don’t believe I did.”

I kissed his cheek then stood and retrieved my cloak.

“Brandle,” I called. “Would you be willing to carry me?”

He appeared at the door several moments later. I smiled and moved so he could pick me up without entering the cottage.

“Do you think they would find this odd if they were watching?” I asked as he moved.

“What do you mean?”

“That you’re able to easily carry a woman several inches taller than you?”

“They’ve fought with us several times and know not to underestimate our strength.”

The worry he wore like a cloak grew heavier.

“Will you help me bathe when I’m finished?” I asked.

His gaze met mine, and I felt his surprise and relief.

“I will.”

The fire was burning brightly in the hearth when we returned, and he closed the door behind us.

“Will you tell me what’s worrying you?” I asked as I freed my shift’s tie.

He helped me lift it over my head and turned me. His fingers swept through my hair, twisting it up into a coil, which he secured with a smooth stick.

“Please, Brandle,” I said when he remained silent.

He plucked the tie holding my bleeding cloths in place, and I fought not to flush as he removed them.

“Some things, I cannot tell you,” he said, clasping my hand and helping me into the water. “And some things, I chose not to share out of fear. You’re helping us, Kellen, and I don’t want to do anything that will cause you to run.”

“I won’t run, Brandle,” I said as I leaned back against the tub.

His gaze searched mine; then he took the cloth, wetting it and soaping it.

“I would like you to treat me as you do your brothers.” He froze and looked at me in panic. I laughed. “Only in the regard that you don’t keep secrets from me. If your curse isn’t preventing you from speaking it, speak the truth as I have been doing. Even when it’s uncomfortable. Please.”

He sighed and took my hand, washing it first and working his way up my arm.

“I’m worried that the spells you’re casting will attract attention we cannot afford to attract. I’m worried that it’s taking so long to break the spell, not for our sake but your sister’s. I know you fear for her safety. I’m worried we won’t be able to keep my promise of protection. I’m worried that, once the curse is broken, it won’t be enough. I’m worried?—”

I leaned forward suddenly and kissed him. He didn’t try to take control, but he didn’t turn away either. He allowed me to kiss him sweetly as long as I wanted, and I felt his satisfaction that I was doing so.

Slowly withdrawing, I studied him.

“Those concerns are not your burden alone, Brandle. Trust your brothers—trust me—to carry those concerns with you.

“When I agreed to help you, I did so because I believed you were the best option to help my sister. I knew that it would take time to break your curse, and I am using that time to my advantage by learning more about casting, which I hope will help us achieve that goal. So, while I do appreciate your concern for my sister, know that it is a useless concern. It will take as long as it takes, and we are doing everything we can while we wait.

“Now, regarding my spell work attracting attention…according to Garron, Henry cast the spell for the barrier at a great cost. Yet, you weren’t discovered. The spells I’ve cast seem to have very little cost. However, it is wise to practice caution. Garron mentioned methods casters use to cloak themselves. I’ll work on mastering that next. Hiding what I can do will protect me, and mastering what I can do will protect all of you.

“And as for your promise of protection, when you vowed to keep me safe, we both understood you were not promising an outcome but your intent…just like the spells I cast. Do your best, and I will do mine, Brandle. That is all we can ask of one another.

“Regarding whether breaking your curse will be enough… I may not understand the problems you face, but your brothers do. Spend time with them. Think of all the possible outcomes, and create plans.” I feathered my fingers over his cheek.

“Worrying solves nothing. Stop worrying, and start planning, Brandle.”

He darted forward and kissed me hungrily. I could feel his desire, but it was as strong as his devotion and adoration. When he pulled back, I was lightheaded. It took a moment to realize he was washing me and not using it as a means to draw pleasure for me.

The corners of his mouth lifted in a charming smile when I frowned at him.

“I doubt my control to stop once I start, Kitten.”

My heart skipped a beat at his meaning.

“And when you look at me like that, you test my restraint. Whatever lingering concerns you have about being with us, resolve them. Once you do, I am yours for the rest of my life. Do you understand?”

I studied him.

“And if I’m unable to resolve them?” I asked.

“I will need a frigid bath like the one you gave Darian. He said it cooled his desire for hours.”

I laughed and sank deeper into the tub as Brandle idly washed my neck.

“I will do as you ask.”

With my senses open, I stood at the edge of the clearing. After a week of practice, I’d finally braved casting my senses far afield.

“I can feel one,” I said to Garron. One caster among thousands of people living at the edge of Turre.

“Is your lid firmly on your well?” he asked.

“It is.”

“Good. Have they cloaked their energy?”

“No.”

“I think we are right then,” he said.

I brought myself back to the clearing and looked at Garron.

“Have I truly been cloaking myself since that day in the woods?” I asked, still struggling to believe the lid I had on my well was my protection.

“It’s the only explanation that makes sense,” Garron said. “When you first arrived, I couldn’t sense you. It wasn’t until you lost control that we knew.”

“When I lose control, the lid moves off the well to some degree,” I said with a nod. “When I cast, I only lift it a little, so energy doesn’t flood in.” I thought back to when my abilities first appeared. The panic of seeing everything dying at my feet and how naturally I’d closed that part of myself off. Without understanding, I’d not only protected those around me but myself as well.

“Is the lid why I can’t sense how much energy is in the well?” I asked.

Garron considered the question. “Even when cloaked, I sense the energy within my well. However, I don’t believe comparing yourself to me is an accurate assessment of what is possible. I don’t have the same level of control or talent you do. I would be able to sense an uncloaked caster near or in our glade, but not farther afield as you can.”

“I find it frustrating to have so many unanswered questions.”

“I understand. Truly. For now, let’s continue our test. Locate the caster again.”

After I said I found them, he had me cast a simple spell to see if the caster would cloak themself.

“Nothing changed,” I said, closing myself off again. “Why would the caster cloak themself even if they did sense me all the way out here? Casting is allowed in Turre, isn’t it?”

“It is. However, casters in Turre cloak themselves if they sense another caster’s attention on them.”

“Why?”

“The queen,” he said. “Her need for power is absolute. She would never allow another caster of significance to exist in her domain. And the abilities she deems significant vary. To protect themselves, most casters hide.”

“Which is why I would have never been able to hire the caster I needed,” I said, understanding.

“Precisely.”

“Then how will I manage once I break the curse?” I asked.

“That is a question for another day,” he said. “I believe my brothers are seconds away from tossing me into the well for consuming so much of your time.”

I glanced over my shoulder at the others lingering around the cooking fire. Edmund caught my gaze and took a step in my direction. A word from Brandle, which I couldn’t hear, stopped him. Edmund pivoted and stalked off toward the clearing. Eadric jogged after him. I’d warned Edmund the day prior that he would lose his next chance to sleep beside me if he injured his brothers. Though Edmund’s feelings were the most visible, he wasn’t the only one struggling.

“I can feel their frustration and impatience,” I said. “Why did everyone stop touching me, then?” It had been days since any of them had helped me with my morning bath or even petted me while sleeping.

Facing Garron, I watched him lift a hand in the air, even as his face flushed red. I swatted his hand down.

“Don’t call Brandle over here. I want an answer from you , Garron.”

“You stopped bleeding.”

“And?”

A deeper hue consumed his face.

“They…we…”

“Until I’m ready to have sex, no one will touch me again? Is that it?” I guessed.

He nodded, and I crossed my arms.

“No.”

He frowned a little, and some of the heat eased from his face.

“No?”

“Correct. I do not accept that sex must be a condition to receive your affection.”

He shot a panicked look at Brandle. I grabbed his chin and forced his attention back to me.

“Garron, I’ve been told to do as I’ve pleased, and I have. I’ve embraced all of the touching and petting and affection given to me and pushed aside my embarrassment and guilt. Changing the rules now feels like you’re all changing your minds.”

“Snow, that’s not?—“

I covered his mouth with a hand.

“I love the names each of you have given me, but I need to know that you no longer believe my presence is as fleeting as winter, Garron. That you continue to call me that at the same time you’ve all withdrawn from me leads me to doubt. Everything.”

Arms circled me from behind. Brandle. He kissed the back of my neck and cupped a breast.

“Forgive us, Kitten. We didn’t consider you might misunderstand our actions. We are not withholding our affection to force sex upon you. We are keeping our distance because your welcoming presence tempts us to the brink of control. I have no wish to pull Edmund off of you for going too far or to see you throw Edmund to protect yourself and weep in regret as you did with Garron.

“We want you, Kitten, with a desperation that is maddening. The more you accept, the more impatient we’ve become for your surrender. We wish for that above all else–but given freely. Willingly. In your own time. Do you understand?”

“If I can control my urge to fling the lot of you across this clearing, each of you can find the control not to force yourselves upon my person. Do better, Brandle. All of you.”

He kissed the back of my neck.

“We will.”

After, I sat on Liam’s lap while Eadric fed me dinner and purposely selected Eadric and Edmund to sleep beside me. I could feel Edmund’s barely contained aggression and lust as his hands wandered over my person. It called to me, feeding my need to be touched. Since introducing me to the pleasure they could bring, their desire for me had grown. And mine for them. But sexual desire wasn’t what I wanted from them just then.

So when Edmund’s hand dipped to the hemline of my shift, I caught it in mine and shook my head.

“Hold me, and let me hold you. Please,” I said softly. “Show me that you love me, and let me love you in return.”

His aggression faded, and devotion replaced it as he wrapped his arms around me and held me close. Eadric moved closer behind me, stroking my back and hip, soothing me to sleep.

When I woke, I rested on Edmund with my hand petting his chest.

“I love the pleasure you’ve shown me, Edmund, but it isn’t enough. I need more. Kind words. Gentle touches. Understanding. Comfort. All of that together is love. A relationship with only pleasure isn’t truly a relationship at all.” I lifted my head to meet his gaze. “When you said you loved me…when Liam admitted you all feel the same…I thought you wanted a relationship. If I’ve misunderstood?—“

“You haven’t. Brandle shared what you said to him. I was wrong, and I’ll do better. I promise.”

Resting my chin on his chest, I smiled at him as I circled my finger around his nipple.

“Eadric didn’t lie. I do like being touched and like touching in return. I don’t want the pleasure you’ve shown me to disappear, but I need to know I mean more to you than that.”

“You mean more than I ever thought possible, Trouble. Whatever you need, I’ll give it. Without reservation or hesitation. I’ll be your shield and your strength.”

“And my pillow?”

“Always.”