13. Evangeline

Ok, today was a new day, and I was going to woman up and stop being ashamed of myself! I gave myself a pep talk in the mirror as I did my makeup. I didn’t usually bother with makeup; I was an angel and didn’t need it, but sometimes, to feel kickass and brave, you needed something more. Today was one of those days. Yesterday, I spent most of the day fluctuating between right and wrong about my interest in entertaining physically romantic contact with my hounds in their hound forms. Thankfully, while I knew Jett could feel my struggle, his only response was to try to reassure me through our bond that it was ok. He didn’t press me to talk about it. I know I’ll have to have that conversation with them eventually, and I will, but I wasn’t ready for it yesterday.

I’m not ready for it today either, but as I was going to bed last night, I decided that, considering they are my mates, it’s not as weird as it looks on paper. A part of me was still struggling with it, but for the most part, I was okay—or at least I was trying hard to be. It was a process, but one I felt more confident in facing. I finished getting ready for the day and made myself an omelet. As I ate, I scrolled through my emails. I needed to take a day and go through my entire inbox. The little red bubble that reads one thousand plus unread emails could sometimes be annoying. Mostly, I just ignore it, but anytime someone catches a glimpse of my screen and sees it, they tend to have a meltdown, as if it affects them in any way.

An email that came through an hour ago caught my attention. The subject line read: EVANGELINE DON’T IGNORE THIS LIKE YOU DO THE REST OF YOUR EMAILS! If that didn’t catch my attention, the from address, [email protected], would have. I opened the email to find an address and a time. That was it. I checked the time and saw I had only an hour to get across town. I grabbed my things and hopped into the brand-new Jeep Wrangler I bought outright this week after completing a few big ticket contracts. Of course, I got it in purple, and as the top retracted, I slid sunglasses on my face and headed toward the coast. As far as places went, I wasn’t too upset that I ended up in sunny California.

I pulled into the beachside cafe with only minutes to spare. When I stepped inside, the place was surprisingly empty for a Sunday afternoon at the beach. I looked around uncomfortably. What if I had walked into an ambush or something? Nobody knew I was there because I hadn’t told the guys where I was going.

“Sit anywhere you’d like, dear. I’ll be right with you,” an older woman with a weathered face told me from behind the stool-lined counter.

“Thanks,” I smiled. Get it together, Evangeline Faithe. You’re being ridiculous. I chose a booth that overlooked the beach and sat so that I could see the door. The walls of the building were large glass garage-type doors, which they lifted to turn every seat into patio dining. The atmosphere was rather pleasant, and I watched the waves crash against the sand as my mind shifted to my hounds again. Maybe I’ll see if they want to have dinner with me tonight. That would be an excellent, safe step in the right direction.

“Sit anywhere you’d like, dear. I’ll be right with you,” the woman said again, pulling me out of my thoughts.

I looked up and saw a petite woman looking around the restaurant. When her eyes landed on me, an excited grin split her face. “I’m with her,” she said as she pranced down the aisle to me. “Evangeline Faithe, it is so wonderful to meet you in person. I never get to meet the assassins!”

“Shhh,” I scolded as she slid into the booth across from me. I looked around to make sure no one had overheard her. The woman behind the counter didn’t look very interested in us and wouldn’t be anytime soon.

“Sorry. I get loud when I get excited. My mom says it’s because I was born three weeks early and didn’t have time to develop volume control. I’m Mia. I’m the one who emailed you.” I studied the exuberant girl across from me. Something about her piqued my interest and calmed my nerves about this meeting. It was almost like she was too pure, too telegraphic with her emotions and motives to be capable of deceit.

“What can I do for you, Mia?” I asked as the woman finally came out from behind the counter and set menus and glasses of water on the table for us.

“Oh, I didn’t email you to meet me so you could do something for me,” Mia explained as the woman left. “I wanted to make sure that you were ok. I saw you were struggling with something and thought maybe you could use a friend.”

“How did you know I was struggling?” I asked cautiously.

“The Guild knows everything,” she replied in a deeper voice, mockingly, before dissolving into a peal of giggles. “Sorry, that part always gets me.”

“How exactly does The Guild know everything?” I asked out of curiosity.

Mia shrugged as she picked up her menu and flipped through it. “How does any power or magic work? It just does.”

“So if you already know what I’m struggling with, why ask?” I replied evenly as I looked over the menu.

“I don’t know the specifics. We don’t monitor your personal daily life. We can monitor your moods, which helps us fine-tune your contract preferences, but most analysts don’t pay as close attention to the nuances between contracts as I do.”

“Analysts?”

“I’m an analyst for The Guild. You’re one of my cases. I was so excited when your file came across my desk! A fallen angel! That’s a big deal. You were quite the addition to the roster. I applied to be an assassin, but they told me my species was too weak to be an assassin, so I was hired as an analyst. I’m hoping one day I can change their minds.”

Mia continued to chatter as I studied her closer. I sensed she was a shifter but couldn’t pinpoint the exact kind. Her bright blue cat-like eyes and white blonde hair hinted that it might be feline, but I couldn’t tell what kind. “What kind of shifter are you?” I asked.

“Cat,” she replied sullenly.

That was helpful. “Yes, but what kind?”

“Cat,” she replied again.

She looked up and met my eyes. I knew I had a weird look on my face, but I was at a loss for words on how to rephrase my question to get her to answer it. It wasn’t until her ears turned pink that it dawned on me that she had. “Oh! You mean, like, cat. As in house,” I clarified, taking a sip of water so I didn’t laugh.

“Yep,” she replied dryly. “Ragdoll, to be specific.”

Water shot from my mouth all over her and the table. I coughed as I tried to apologize. “I’m sorry, it isn’t nice to laugh. It’s not funny.”

Mia laughed as she dried her face. “It isn’t, but it is,” she replied. “Now you understand why they felt I wasn’t assassin material. The best I can do is warm someone’s feet on a cold day.

“Oh, come on,” I replied, trying to make her feel better. “I’ve known plenty of terrifying cats.”

“You’re just being nice. I know kitty cats aren’t fearsome, but I could be a good assassin if they gave me the chance. I mean, as a cat, I can totally get into places under the radar that most can’t,” she replied, pitching her case that she must have rehearsed more than once in the mirror.

“Hey, you have my vote,” I assured her.

“Ok, enough about me. Did you want to talk about it?” Mia asked.

“What can I get you?” the waitress asked as she returned, bringing a welcome delay to a conversation I wasn’t sure I wanted to have with a stranger.

“Can I try the baja fish tacos?” I asked.

“Do you want that with a side of rice or a salad?”

“I’ll take the rice,” I replied, handing her my menu.

“To drink?”

“Water is fine.”

“And you?” the waitress asked, turning to Mia.

“Can I get the avocado burger with fries? And a lemonade?” Mia replied.

“You got it,” the waitress replied, taking our menus and leaving us.

Mia sipped her water as she watched me patiently, waiting for me to start talking.

I sighed. What the hell? It could help to have an unbiased party to talk to about it. “Ok, well, you know why I fell, right?”

Mia blushed bright red. “You slept with a hellhound,” she whispered conspiratorially.

“How old are you, Mia?” I asked, surprised by her obvious embarrassment.

“Twenty-two,” she replied, lifting her chin defiantly, daring me to think she was too young.

She was young, and I suspected she hadn’t had much experience sexually, but she was an adult, so I continued. “Well, as it turns out, those hellhounds are my mates.”

Mia’s jaw dropped comically, and for the first time, I could appreciate the humor in the situation. I chuckled as she sputtered, “Can angels have mates? How the hell is that supposed to work?”

“Well, I fell, so that’s the first step. And apparently, we can. Believe me, it was news to me, too.”

“Ok,” she said, “but now that you’ve fallen, what’s the problem?”

What was the problem? “Well, first, I was struggling with the entire thing,” I started. “But I think I’ve mostly come to terms with it. I don’t really know how or why they’re my mates, but I can’t deny that they are.”

“And now?” Mia asked.

“Now, I’m struggling with... certain desires.”

“Like what?”

Oh, fuck. Was I really about to say this out loud? “Like wanting to do things with them when they’re in their hound form,” I replied. I was rather proud that I got it out with my head held high.

Mia turned pink again. “Oh,” she replied. “Ok. I can see how, as a fallen angel, you might struggle with that, but as a shifter, can I tell you it isn’t all that weird? Think about it: it’s still them or part of them. It’s not like they’re actual dogs, right? They’re hellhounds, one of Hell’s monsters. It’s totally different and nothing to be embarrassed about. You’re their mate, so I think it would make sense that you would be into that. If anything, it should be even more proof that you’re meant to be together.”

“You think?” I asked. “You aren’t just saying that to make me feel better?”

“Hey, you have my vote,” she quipped, parroting my earlier statement to her.

The waitress brought us our food, and I contemplated what Mia had said as we began to eat. I was pleased and a little relieved that her opinion mirrored the conclusion I had come to as well. She was young, sure, but she was still a shifter, and the fact that my new friend hadn’t reacted to my revelation with disgust mattered.

“Thanks,” I said earnestly. “I guess I did need someone to talk to.”

Mia grinned. “See, with me as your analyst, you get the personal touch.” Her smile faded, and she looked around furtively before lowering her voice to a whisper. “Also, I would make peace with your hounds sooner rather than later. Something big is going on, and I heard your name mentioned.”

“Like what?” I asked, a feeling of unease settling in my stomach.

“I don’t know. They’re keeping it really hush-hush. Whatever it is, it’s big,” Mia replied, taking a bite of her burger.

We spent the rest of the time chatting and getting to know each other better. When lunch ended, we exchanged numbers, and I promised to reach out to her if I needed anything, even if it was just to talk.

When I got home, a black card was sitting in the middle of my kitchen table. I picked it up and stared at the information on it in shock. Holy shit! Mia was right; this was big. For the amount of money they were offering for the contract, it wasn’t just big, it was fucking huge. I was going to have to talk to the hounds about this one. Now.

I left my apartment, and as I rode the elevator back down, I looked at the card again to make sure that I hadn’t imagined it.