Chapter 8

Arya

I was so lost with need and drunk on the aftermath of pleasure that still coursed through my body that I didn't immediately realize Tobias had pulled away.

I opened my heavy-lidded eyes to see him climbing to his feet and stuffing himself back into his pants. Confusion warred with disorientation as I scanned his face for an explanation, but the steely set to his jaw said everything.

Rejection and shame washed over me, icy cold and extinguishing the fire of desire he'd ignited inside me.

I pushed myself up to lean with my palms on the damp grass, curling my too exposed legs under me.

"What's wrong?" I asked in a fragile tone I hated.

He zipped up his pants, not looking at me as he said, "I can't do this."

His words slapped me in the face, stinging down to my heart. My eyes burned with fresh mortified tears, but I refused to let them spill.

"What happened?" I didn't have better words to use, especially at that moment. It was a miracle I had gotten those two words out at all without my voice cracking.

Things were going so well. Way better than I'd expected, actually. I absolutely hadn't intended to do more than kiss him tonight, and until this moment, I hadn't felt bad about the turn the night had taken. And the way he'd made me feel!—but I was so far removed from that bliss that I could hardly believe it even happened.

I didn't understand why he suddenly changed—again! Was my smell offensive? Did he think I was a huge slut for letting him go down on me and then asking for more? Did he suddenly decide my being a mermaid was too taboo for him to deal with? What was it?!

"I thought I was strong enough, but I'm just…not," he eventually ground out.

I waited a few breaths for him to elaborate, but all he did was straighten his shirt over the top of his pants and continue to glare down at the ground. The angry look on his face turned my hurt into indignation.

What was he talking about? Not strong enough for what?

"What the hell does that even mean, Tobias?" I asked, my tone growing heavier and snappier with my rising anger.

A scowl lowered on his brow, and he crossed his arms, closing himself off to me completely.

I got up off the ground and stalked toward him, planting myself right in his face.

"Look at me," I ordered.

I stared at his stupid handsome face, watching as he slowly raised his gaze up to meet mine. His amber eyes were completely devoid of the heat I'd come to know so well. They might as well be the tepid stones they resembled.

"Why are you pulling away from me?" I demanded, softening my tone at the end. "Did I do something?"

His features smoothed slightly, then pinched once more, either in desperation or irritation, I couldn't tell. "No. You didn't do anything. I'm just not good for you."

He averted his gaze again like it was painful to keep looking at me. But all I could do was stare at him, trying to read some secret on his face that he wasn't saying.

I thought about all the times we'd gotten close, only for him to push me away and then act like a jealous asshole when someone else got close to me.

"Is that what all this hot-and-cold is about?" I asked snidely, placing my hands obstinately on my hips. "Because you think you're not good for me? Who said you get to decide that for me? I'm a big girl, Tobias. I can make my own choices and face the consequences."

He shook his head. "You don't understand. I'm not good for anyone."

I crossed my arms, mirroring his stance but with far more attitude, and pushed my tongue into my cheek. "So what, then? You're just going to keep playing yo-yo with me until you figure out whether or not that matters? I'm not some bimbo you can string along while you ‘find yourself' or whatever the hell it is you're doing."

His eyes met mine, somehow pleading and refusing all at the same time. "I'm not trying to hurt you. That's the last thing I want to do."

My anger spasmed like a solar flare, whipping my insides with scorching heat.

"Well, you know what, you just did," I declared. "Feel free to let me know when you decide to stop pitying yourself and be a real man. But don't expect me to wait around for you."

I strode off toward the bushes that separated us from the walking path, but the torn panties hanging around my upper thighs nearly tripped me. Growling like a furious jungle cat, I reached under my dress and ripped the lace off me with a forceful yank, then threw the tattered material on the ground at his feet.

"You can add that to your trophy collection," I snapped before storming away.

I didn't care whether that made sense or about the fact that my lady bits were still wet and catching the chill of the November night air without the protection of underwear. I just needed to get away from him.

How could I have been so stupid? Time and time again, Tobias had proven that he wasn't boyfriend material. Hell, he was hardly friend material!

I had thought earlier tonight that I saw a kindred spirit in him, someone who'd been smothered and restricted by an overbearing parent and was now thirsting to live life to the fullest. But he wasn't. He let fear rule him, let it shut him down to anyone and everyone. He was way more fucked up than I was, and I didn't need that in my life right now.

I was done with Tobias Dracul .