Chapter Nine

Bobby

The beeping of my alarm ripped me from the most wonderful dream. Nick and I had been at the amusement park of all places. It wasn’t even the right time of year, but that didn’t seem to make a difference to my sleepy brain. We were on a Ferris wheel, the old-fashioned kind where you faced forward, not in a car, and we stopped at the very top as they let someone off. Nick held my hand and was pointing out all the rides he was going to take me on next.

As far as dreams went, it wasn’t overly exciting. Not really, but something about it had me all warm in the middle. Stupid alarm had to go and ruin it.

I reached to grab my phone to turn it off and saw a message notification I’d missed from the night before. I tapped it, and it was Nick. Did he have a dream about me too? If he did, I kinda hoped it was a dirty one. Whatever that said about me, so be it. It was true.

Hope you have a wonderful day.

It wasn’t the first message we’d exchanged in the few days since our date. We’d actually been talking and texting quite a bit. Between his work schedule and mine, that was all we had time for. He was actually in another city for two of those days. After Christmas, I’d be able to see him more often. And yes, I was already planning for after the holidays. Apparently, I was jumping in with both feet.

I was glad Nick wasn’t the playing-games kind of guy, like so many I dated when I was younger. They all did the thing where they didn’t call for a specific number of days, kept things short, or left me hanging. Whatever the logic was behind making people think you didn’t really like them, I never understood it.

With Nick, it was pretty clear he enjoyed our time together and wanted to get to know me. I scrolled up to read our messages. I’d probably reread them a thousand times. They weren’t anything too serious, but they still made me smile each and every time.

How was your day?

Martha brought in cupcakes to work for their birthday.

The snow was beautiful this morning.

I think my boss is going to make us do a Secret Santa this year.

They weren’t anything too personal or even that interesting, yet every single one was special.

“Rooney, I don’t want to get up. I just want to stay here and read the messages.”

But I did have to get up. Work waited.

I sent a message back, telling Nick I hoped his day was good, then got ready for my morning. After showering, dressing, making coffee, and packing my lunch—if throwing a package of ramen into my lunch sack counted—I was off.

Coffee in hand and backpack over my shoulders, I stepped out of my warm apartment building and into the cold. The wind was really ripping through the streets today. If I had PTO, I would’ve been back up in my apartment under my warm blankies, but I didn’t, so off to the bus stop I went.

At least I didn’t have to wait long for the bus. Not the first one, at least. My transfer stop though? I had the usual fifteen-minute wait there, and it was too cold for that.

I took out my phone to check the weather, crossing my fingers and toes that it would warm up as the day went on. It wasn’t going to, but I did see that Nick sent me another message, making the news less hard to take. I turned my notifications back on to make sure I wouldn’t miss any others and opened it up.

He’d sent me a picture of his car all covered in snow. From the looks of it, the wind had given him more than his share. Either that, or his side of the city had been slammed a lot harder than this one.

Hope you have a scraper.

I wasn’t sure I had one for my car. I needed to check on that. I was going to need to drive to the mall later, the bus routes to that stop ending too soon for me to get home via public transport.

He replied with a selfie, holding one up like it was a fish for a dating profile. I couldn’t help but chuckle.

He looked good. But of course he did—it was Nick. I had a feeling that even first thing in the morning he looked like a full-ass six-course meal. Wait…were six-course meals even a thing? They had to be because he was that delicious.

Nick asked if I was on my way to work, and I told him I was. Then he asked if he could call. Instead of replying, I phoned him.

“Morning, Nick. What’s up?”

“I was calling to see what your schedule was this weekend and to ask if you might want to go on another date with me.” It was so good to hear his voice.

“I’d love that.” Which probably sounded more believable before I gave him my schedule, thwarting most all times we could get together.

I was working double shifts as the Drummer Boy when my day work schedule allowed it. Ron had quit the drummer gig, and I didn’t mind adding his hours to my own schedule money wise, but socially? It was not so great for starting a new…dating-ship. Was that what we were? It wasn’t a relationship—not yet. Yeah, dating-ship. I was going with that.

We made plans, and as my bus pulled up, I said goodbye and headed to work.

It was a long, boring day in the office, and when it was finally time to leave, I nearly bolted for the door. I stopped home just long enough to change into my costume for the mall drummer gig. Work there was getting hectic as Christmas drew closer and at least that made the time go more quickly than my day job.

Today was particularly chaotic. One of the elves had called in sick, which meant, I was on Santa-line duty. On weekends, the kids were generally better about waiting their turn, but during the school week, they were often overtired, their grumpiness shining through. At least it was an early night.

When I got home, I was burned out. After the world’s fastest shower to get rid of my makeup and sweat, I changed into my favorite dinosaur pajamas, filled a sippy cup with milk, and grabbed Rooney.

I dug through my little drawer until I found my rubber blocks. They weren’t as fun as the large set of building blocks I used to have, but they came in a small container, were easy to move, and didn’t make much noise. They worked for apartment life.

Sitting on the floor, I stacked the blocks one on top of the other. When I got to five high, Rooney would “knock” them down, and I’d start all over again. One time then another and another. I sipped my milk in between and, for the first time in a long time, slipped deeply into little space.

It was exactly what I needed.

Climbing into bed that night and hugging Rooney close, I told him all about Nick and how much I liked him. As I fell asleep, part of me felt guilty for falling so deeply for someone this quickly, especially after Daddy. But it had been years since he passed—not days.

This was what Daddy had wanted for me. He didn’t want me to be alone forever. He’d made sure I knew that.

This wasn’t about me replacing him or anything like that. Nick wasn’t very much like Daddy at all. Daddy had been stern and controlling, and I liked that. I thrived on it. But it wasn’t the only thing I liked or the only way I thrived.

The truth was, I liked Nick’s softer approach too.

Once upon a time, that wasn’t what I needed. But now…now, I was beginning to think it was.

I fell asleep thinking about him.

When I woke up, I was hard, and once again, I was thinking about him. It wasn’t the first morning I’d woken up that way, and it probably wouldn’t be the last.

Nick had that effect on me, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t like it.