9. Liam

The secondI got off the phone with Nathan I threw the damn thing across the bathroom and relished in the sound of glass breaking. Now all I could see were fragments of myself in the mirror which was exactly the way she made me feel.

Shattered.

Lucy was slowly destroying any sense of restraint and humanity I had.

Waking up to find the bed empty had been the single most terrifying moment of my life. I'd been convinced I'd never find her again and it hadn't even occurred to me there might be something worse that could happen.

Like her finding something that would ensure she left.

Running my hand through my hair, I tried to remind myself I still had a chance. She still wanted us even if she didn't know how to deal with it. The surveillance hadn't been a deal breaker and neither had Arturo, but if she found out any more secrets, that would be the end.

Why couldn't I find the right time to tell her? Should I just say fuck it, and tell her right now? Part of me thought that was the right choice, but the other part knew it would only make her panic even more than she already was.

That was the last thing I wanted her to have to experience after everything she's been through.

Yeah, I was worried about how the truth would affect her, but if I were being honest with myself, I was just as close to panicking as she was.

What would I do if she started freaking out again? What if she got furious with me for not telling her sooner and told me whatever chance I might've had was gone?

I ran my hand over my face and took a deep breath full of the steam filling the bathroom. It smelled like nothing and I tried not to let that bother me.

Tilting my head to the side, I popped my neck and told myself not to think about any of it. Just scenting her panic when she thought I was going to leave and never come back had nearly sent me into a murderous rage.

What happened at Bite would look like child's play if we weren't very, very careful about the next step.

But everything had to be up to Lucy or this would never work.

I had to trust my omega. She was a very logical, rational person. If I gave her another mystery to solve, she could choose whether or not to solve it. I could warn her what might happen if she does find the answer, and then let her make that choice.

Any possibility of a relationship would have to be on her too.

I hated dumping so much responsibility on her, but Lucy wasn't a normal omega. If I didn't show her I could be more than the alpha stereotype, she'd never fully trust me.

The only way to prove that she could was to let her go and hope to fuck she'd come back.

Just thinking about watching her walk away from me made my blood boil, but I clenched my fists and forced myself to breathe through the rage – reminding myself Lucy couldn't resist a good mystery and even after a few days of keeping our pheromones to ourselves, I was sure she'd miss us.

Because I would be missing her.

Every fucking second of every day.

My phone rang and I glared at it, wondering who would dare call my personal cell after I'd warned them all off. It vibrated in the sink where it landed after I'd thrown it, all the glass in there tinkling as well. My mother always had such impeccable timing, didn't she?

I tapped the cracked screen and turned on the speaker.

As usual, she didn't wait for any sort of greeting. "What the hell are you doing, Liam?"

"At the moment, I'm about to take a shower."

My mother actually growled at me for daring to act oblivious. "It's been over two weeks. Why aren't you back in the office yet?"

Normally, I would see how far I could push her before she exploded, but it hasn't been that long since she got the call that one of her children was brutally murdered and the other was taken in for questioning as the prime suspect.

So, I decided to try to be a little less of an asshole for once.

"The omega's heat triggered my rut. I apologize, Mother. We're going in to see the doctor before heading back to work." There was a lot more I could say, but that was all she really needed to know.

"How absurd. I can't believe one of the two detectives we hired was actually an omega. If she was an alpha or a beta, this never would have happened. What was Genesis thinking? It's ridiculous they even hired an omega as a detective in the first place."

I gripped the sink instead of snarling at my mother, forcing myself to use what Cas had taught me. I couldn't tell her this was my omega. Not yet. I couldn't tell her it was the girl I was obsessed with as a kid either.

Not until Lucy agreed.

"Despite the situation, she's very good at her job," I gritted out, trying to keep my tone as civil as possible. "Not even Cas can do what she does."

"As long as the job gets done, I don't care. So make sure it happens, Liam."

The sink cracked from the force of my grip, but I kept my face expressionless even though she couldn't see me. "Of course, Mother. Anything else? I have work to do."

"I'd like you to reconsider the union between you and the Steele pack's omega princess. When would you be available to meet with her?"

Never.

I bit down on the inside of my cheek. Arguing with her about this was pointless and if I started yelling Lucy might hear me.

She may be strong, but she was sensitive to my emotions and had a tendency to assume I was mad at her whenever I was pissed off despite it being the farthest thing from the truth.

"As lovely as River Steele is, I'm not interested. Send the Steele alpha my apologies."

I'd done my best to sound like the polite, corporate gentleman my mother's been grooming me to be, but the slight growl in the back of my throat ruined all those gracious words and made them sound more like a threat instead.

Why couldn't I just calm the fuck down? Why did the universe insist on testing me right now? I was barely keeping my shit together and my mother wanted to force this ridiculous meeting with another omega on me now?

"Liam—"

"Mother. If I have to meet with her, I might just kill her, so please. Don't insist."

Nothing could risk my relationship with Lucy. I refused to even look at another omega until we were bonded. She was so sensitive after being told she was defective all her life, and I would never forget the look on her face when she'd seen the way Melinda had clung to me.

I refused to do anything that would force me to see her look like that again.

"Don't tell me you're getting attached to that omega detective."

Maybe I should be grateful my mother didn't sound surprised, but the irritation in her words was a warning. She was giving me a chance to deny it, but I hadn't been lying when I told Lucy I'd destroy every legacy pack in this fucking city to keep her by my side.

Even my own.

"I think it would be best if we focused on finding out who killed Gideon and why," I managed. "I'll take care of Valor Enterprises, and all the contracts currently in progress but I won't be taking on any new ones until we know who killed him. If that's going to be a problem, get one of my cousins to take care of it."

I hung up before she could argue with me and selected the group chat Cas had made with Frankie when Lucy had gone into heat. That man was the only reason I was still somewhat sane.

Without him…I didn't like to think about what I'd do if I lost him.

Frankie, I need you to come get Lucy and take her to Nathan's office. Her heat broke, but the symptoms are starting to come back.

Her appointment is at 1 p.m. Don't be late.

And I need to speak with your father as soon as possible.

I tossed the phone back into the sink and considered how I should play my cards.

There was a risk that telling her she could go without me or Cas would trigger her abandonment issues and she'd panic again. There was also the possibility that she'd assume we didn't want her.

Lucy was deeply afraid of being abandoned, which was the only logical explanation for why she kept insisting that what we felt for each other was nothing more than the influence of our pheromones. If it wasn't real, she couldn't be hurt by it.

She couldn't be abandoned by someone she never got attached to in the first place, but this thing between us was far more complicated than that.

Regardless, we had to give her the option, even if it was alarming how easily I lost my mind because of her. I was genuinely concerned I'd have to be put down if she decided she wanted nothing to do with me.

It didn't matter. We'd prove to her none of this complicated bullshit mattered. Only her. I'd give up everything if I had to and run away with her.

That decided, I stripped off my pants and stepped into the shower.

The boiling hot water washed away every trace of her, and the soap erased any lingering traces of our pheromones. I tried not to let it bother me and dried off as quickly as possible before covering my neck with the strongest scent blockers available.

At least the suppressant I'd taken before coming up here was starting to work. I should be a little less…psychotic when I saw her again.

Then I threw on a pair of sweats and a hoodie so the majority of my skin was covered. If I caught her staring at my bare chest again it was all over. But I'd turned every purifier in the house on the highest setting and all the windows were open, so as long as I stayed downstairs until my bedroom had aired out a bit, I'd be fine.

I wouldn't lose control.