Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1

brIAR

" O pen your eyes, child."

My eyes snap open at the strangely familiar voice, and I realize I'm soaring through the air. I'm flying toward one of the men on the ground.

I could have sworn I was standing still before I closed my eyes.

"You were."

Why is there a voice in my head? And why does it sound like my mom's friend in my weird dream?

Aw, man. I'm totally going crazy. Everything has finally caught up with me, and I've lost every last marble I have. It was bound to happen at some point. I'm surprised I made it this long without a mental breakdown.

"You are not crazy, child. I am your wolf."

I don't have a chance to respond because I land on top of the goon's chest. His wide, terrified eyes meet mine, and he lets out a girly little scream.

Snorting internally at his reaction, I'm surprised when it comes out as a weird chuffing sound.

Before I can think too much about it, my jaws wrap around his throat. My teeth clamp together around his vulnerable windpipe. With a shake of my head and a pull, I rip out the man's throat. Warm, coppery blood gushes into my mouth. I should be grossed out by it. Instead, I savor the taste of his death as I watch the light drain from his muddy-brown eyes.

It feels like I'm a passenger in my own body. While I can see everything happening, I'm not in control of any of it.

"I am in control. Once you are used to this form, I will cede control."

I'm about to ask what form the voice is talking about when my head dips down. I see two gigantic paws instead of my body. They're covered in jet-black fur that looks like the same shade as my hair.

Holy shit. I have paws. And fur.

Peering behind me, I see a sleek fur-covered body, hind legs, and a fluffy black tail.

Oh my God.

I'm a wolf.

I've turned into a fucking wolf!

I guess the wolfsbane Patrick forced me to drink worked after all.

A groan from my right yanks me from my perusal of myself. Whipping my head around, I see Xander on the ground. All the heartbreak comes crashing back into me. A pained whine makes its way out of my throat. It's hard to breathe through the grief choking me at losing him.

"He is not dead. Silver isn't fatal to wolves. I have also seen many mortal wounds in my lifetimes, and that is not one of them."

I'm about to argue when Xander blinks open his amber wolf eyes. They're unfocused until they meet mine. My legs threaten to give out from underneath me. I've never been so relieved to see a set of amber eyes in my entire life.

Xander stares at me for a moment, like he doesn't understand what he's seeing. Then his eyes widen, and he struggles to stand up.

"Stop, you dummy. You're hurt!" I try to say. It comes out as a series of barks instead, which makes sense since I'm apparently a wolf now.

Jesus Christ. How did this become my life?

Even though I just bark, Xander still gets the message. He lays his gigantic blond head back down. His chest rapidly rises and falls as he pants from the pain and the exertion of trying to get up.

I want to go to him, but I'm not sure how to get there. A thought is all it takes, I guess. I bound over to him. My head dips down, and I give him a sloppy, wet lick across his face with my humungous tongue, leaving a trail of slobber on his snout.

Gross.

"Shift!" a deep voice commands from behind me. The fur on my back bristles at the order, and a shiver skates along my spine, but nothing else happens.

At least to me.

Xander instantly starts changing back into a human. His fur recedes, and his body realigns in a series of snaps. It's a relatively quick process that takes just seconds. When he's finished, he's no longer covered in golden fur. Instead, Xander's completely naked. My eyes wander across his tanned skin, wolf tattoo on his defined pec, ripped six-pack, and down to his dick.

As soon as I see his cock, I yank my gaze back to his face, feeling guilty about checking him out when he's injured. Fortunately for me, he's not looking at me.

If no one saw me do it, it didn't really happen. That's totally how it works.

Once he's shifted back, Xander groans. "Fuck, man. Getting shot hurts like a bitch."

I chuff out a wolf laugh at his complaining, thankful beyond belief that he's still here to complain.

My gaze jumps from his now forest green eyes to the bloody wound in his shoulder. It's ragged and torn, and it's still oozing blood. But it's not over his heart. Thank the good lord above that the goon wasn't a good shot. Otherwise… well, I don't really want to think about the alternative. I'm not sure if shifted wolves can cry, but I'm about to find out if I keep thinking about losing him.

Malachi crouches in front of me. "I need you to shift back, baby girl. My dad and his men are on the way. We don't want anyone to know you can shift yet," he says, drawing me out of my depressing thoughts.

My eyes briefly dip to his crotch. I'm not sure if I'm relieved or disappointed he's wearing gray sweats.

Malachi slowly reaches a hand toward me. When I don't move away, he runs his fingers through the coarse fur on the top of my head. He then trails his fingers behind one of my ears, giving me an affectionate scratch.

Ooh, ear scratches feel good. I can see why dogs like it now.

That's… not something I ever thought I'd say. I can focus on the weirdness of turning into a forest creature later. Right now, I have more pressing concerns—like figuring out how I can get back to my human form.

How do I shift? I ask the voice in my mind.

"Just inform me you would like to shift. I will release control over your body. Do you want to shift now?"

Yeah, I guess so. What should I call you?

"You can call me Elissa or Dido, child," she whispers in my mind.

My eyes widen in surprise. Dido, like the Dido? From the Aeneid?

That's not possible. There's no way I have the legendary Queen of the Phoenicians chilling out in my brain.

Before I can ask her about it, I feel like I'm falling again. I close my eyes as my stomach lurches. After a few seconds, I stop feeling like I'm on a Tilt-a-Whirl. Cracking one eye open, I see Malachi gazing at me in wonder.

My eyes widen as I realize I'm probably naked too. That seems to be what happens after a shift. Darting my gaze down, I see that I'm still fully clothed and kneeling on the ground. I breathe out a sigh of relief that I'm not naked in the bank parking lot. That'd be awkward for everyone involved.

"What?" I ask him as he continues to stare at me.

"You don't shift like a normal wolf, Briar," Malachi informs me.

"What do you mean?" It would be just my luck to be a defective wolf. Patrick probably messed up something with the wolfsbane. Now I'm a freak of a wolf.

Great.

"You shift in a swirl of blue light. One moment you're a wolf, the next you're human. Every other wolf I know shifts in a breaking and reforming of bones and joints. Shifting also shreds our clothes. Yours are still here." Malachi tosses a pair of sweatpants over Xander's groin as he talks. While he's still naked, at least the important bits are covered now.

"Um… is that a bad thing?" It doesn't sound like I'm a deformed wolf monster with six legs or something. That's good at least. I'm also totally fine with not ruining my clothes every time I wolf out. Clothes shopping is the worst. I'm glad I won't have to do it any more than normal.

Malachi chuckles, the sound rumbling across the mostly empty parking lot. "No, baby girl, it's not a bad thing. It's just different."

"Your wolf's beautiful, Briar," Xander says from behind Malachi. That's probably the nicest thing he's ever said to me. My heart only feels like it's pierced by a small arrow at the compliment. He clearly likes my wolf more than me.

But I'll take what I can get with him.

Remembering that he's injured, I shout his name as I scramble over to him. When I reach his side, I place one of my hands on his muscular bicep. "You don't get to fucking die on me!" I snarl at him in an echo of what he told me last week. Then I slam my lips onto his in a hard, fast kiss. He doesn't have a chance to kiss me back before I tear my mouth away from his and glare down at him, daring him to disagree with me.

Xander just stares at me, his lips parted in shock. It takes several moments before he shakes off his daze. With a pained laugh, he replies, "I wasn't fucking planning on it, sweetheart."

He rarely calls me sweetheart, and my heart skips a beat every time it slips out of his mouth, but I don't have a chance to focus on him using an endearment as Xander's laugh quickly turns into a cough.

"What's wrong?" I ask frantically.

"I got shot," Xander tells me dryly. His eyes slip closed, and his mouth twists in a grimace.

I roll my eyes. "Trust me, I'm aware. I meant why are you coughing?"

He attempts to shrug, but the movement pulls on his wound, and he winces. "I don't know. I don't think the bullet hit my lungs, but I can't exactly check inside the wound right now. Blood loss is likely the biggest concern." By the increasing puddle of rust-colored liquid behind his shoulder, I'd say he's right. Xander hasn't bled out yet, so I have to hope it's nothing life-threatening.

As I open my mouth to ask Malachi when Uncle Vale will be here, Bastian storms over. He's also wearing gray sweats without a shirt.

"Why the fuck did you do that?" Bastian yells at his twin.

He's angrier than I've ever seen him. While Bastian usually wears a smile, his face is currently twisted into a mask of rage. The veins at his temple throb in agitation. His jaw grinds so hard I'm surprised he hasn't broken any of his molars.

Bastian drops to the ground on Xander's other side and clutches Xander's hand in one of his own.

"To save you," Xander replies weakly, struggling to open his green eyes. Eventually, he pries his lids apart and stares at his twin. His gaze shines with so much brotherly love it makes a lump form in my throat.

"You could have died!" Bastian roars as a tear slips down his cheek. He angrily brushes it away with his shoulder.

I want to comfort him, but I'm not sure he wants me to touch him right now. After all, I am the reason his twin got shot.

"Better me than you." Xander loses the battle to keep his eyes open and lets them close again with a sigh of relief.

Seeing him so vulnerable and weak is making me nervous. When he blinked his amber wolf eyes at me, I thought he was fine—albeit with an extra hole in his body, but fine apart from that. Now, I'm not so sure. Hopefully help will be here shortly.

"No! Not better you! We fucking need you, you asshole," Bastian chokes out. He hangs his head and squeezes his brother's hand tightly.

"You don't. You'll be fine without me," Xander mutters, his voice barely above a whisper.

The puddle beneath Xander's shoulder is rapidly spreading now. Crimson liquid soaks into the knees of Bastian's sweatpants. He doesn't notice, though. "No, we won't, you goddamn idiot! None of us will ever be fine again without you," Bastian rasps, his voice hoarse with emotion. Tears prick my eyes at the raw anguish in Bastian's words.

He's right, though. None of us will be okay without Xander. The snarky, aloof man snuck right past all my defenses when I wasn't looking. Now, he's lodged in my heart, causing me so much pain it hurts to breathe.

Xander doesn't respond.

"Xander," Bastian calls. Xander still doesn't open his eyes or give any reaction to his twin's words. Bastian tries shaking him, but nothing happens. Xander doesn't so much as twitch a single muscle.

My heart sinks.

No!

No, this can't be happening again.