Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

The morning seemed to have come too early for Blair. The air was cold, the magic of the darkness around her gone, with the realization of distant danger growing stronger in her mind. She woke this time, not with a gentle brush of James' hand on her cheek, but from him shifting awake, moving her to wake her. She couldn't help but notice he quickly moved away from her, keeping himself busy enough to not make eye contact.

He stared around the small encampment and then up at the canopy. "We should get a move on. They'll have noticed our absence by now and will be makin' a plan to look fer us."

"Right," she whispered, standing up from the log.

Blair wasn't sure what she expected from James, but the cold shoulder wasn't it. In some ways she felt hurt by his inability to even show a modicum of emotion toward her. They had kissed and fallen asleep in each other's arms, after all. She was desperately trying to push away her sudden feelings of resentment toward him. As she leaned against a nearby tree to fix her boot, she noticed the bark. Her hand gently ran down the smooth surface, realizing they had gone farther into the forest than she originally thought. The tree trunks were smooth and white, and the branches were high above her, very few hanging down to snag her cheek or clothing.

A nudge on the back of her arm startled her. Blair swung around to find James' horse pushing at her side. She smiled and lifted her hand to its chin, running her hands down its snout. James ruffled around in the leaves, pushing them from side to side to cover up where they had stopped. All the shifting of leaves in the world wouldn't cover up the memory of that kiss, though. But Blair knew keeping her attention on that was a dangerous thing. She had to focus on the task at hand. They had no idea how much further the wise old woman's house was, if it were even there at all.

"ye can ride the horse with me," James said, almost harshly. "The branches are too high to impede our journey from 'ere. We should be able to make better time than the guards will. They still have tae trudge through the low hangin' branches, if they are even headed in the right direction. We should go though, just in case they got an early start on us."

James pulled himself up on the horse and reached down for Blair's hand. She glared at it for a moment, contemplating ignoring his help and pulling herself up on her own. She looked up at the tall horse, realizing she hadn't ridden with someone else since she was a little girl. She'd be more likely to kick James in the head, than actually make it on successfully. So, begrudgingly, Blair reached up and took James' hand, allowing him to help pull her up and over. As she sat, they settled onto the horse together, their bodies sliding until there was no air between them. As James reached around her with the reins, she could feel the wild beat of his heart against her back, her own speeding up to match.

The horse started slow, but as James became comfortable with riding and following the stream, it picked up the pace. Blair struggled to ignore the feeling of James against her back. She thought of everything she could to get her mind off of it. She started with thoughts of her sisters, memories of her parents, and slowly as she ran out of ideas, she began to recall the ingredients to the bread they made in the kitchen at the keep.

"Did you say flour?" James asked from behind her.

Blair cleared her throat. "Um, aye. I was just…it doesn't matter. My mind was wandering. Ye can only look at the same trees over and over again, before ye start tae wonder if ye've gone and gotten yerself lost."

"The stream seems to be movin' in a straighter line. I expect we'll be there soon."

A slightly awkward silence fell between them. Blair wasn't even sure what to say to James anymore. She had suddenly started feeling self-conscious around him. The kiss was something she would never forget, but she had hoped the day after it hadn't become so uncomfortable, especially all alone in a strange place together. It was really the first time she felt shy around James. He had always been so comforting and easy to talk to and be around. With the unspoken passion from the night before lingering like a thick fog between them, even the feeling of his warm chest against her back felt distant.

James cleared his throat, uncomfortably shifting the subject. "I've been thinkin' about our return. We can't just saunter back into camp like nothin' happened. The guards may be tired, but they aren't stupid. With the fear yer uncle has put on em' I don't think we can trust any of 'em at this point. Even if they were from the time of yer father. Every one of 'em has a family and loyalty only goes so deep these days."

"So, what should we do?" she asked, glancing over her shoulder toward James. "Say that I made a run fer it?"

James shook his head, his eyes shifting all around them as they rode. "No. I would have to treat you with aggression bringin' ye back. It'd also be difficult to explain how far ye got before I caught up with ye, since yer horse is still back at camp."

Blair took a deep breath, regretting not making a plan before leaving. "Then what should we do?"

"I think it best our story be that ye were kidnapped," he replied hesitantly. "I'll say I went after ye. I tracked ye through the night. Just a roadside thief, overheard yer status. When I caught up with ye, there was a struggle, ye got free and I killed 'em."

"Will they believe all that?"

James was silent for several moments, and Blair knew it was a fifty-fifty chance. When he finally spoke, he said what Blair already knew to be true. "They'll have their suspicions, but if we make it believable enough, they won't question it. Their job is tae get ye safely back on yer way to ye future husband…and they're not gonna make a fuss over something they could simply accept and move forward with."

Blair nodded and they both fell silent. For the first time since Blair started the trek from her home, she thought about where she was really headed. Speaking about getting married before that felt almost as if she were talking about someone else. When James spoke the words, though, it felt like it was actually real. She had no idea what type of man her husband would be, but the cloud of terrible guilt swirled wildly around the two of them as they rode on in silence. The kiss had meant so much more to Blair than just a passing moment in a trying time. It had tilted her world upside down. Even though she had been desperately trying to push it to the back of her mind to focus on their journey, every time it slipped into her mind, butterflies crowded her chest, and her cheeks immediately blushed.

From the racing of James' heart against her back, Blair could tell that James was having more than just a passing emotion as well. While she knew there was nothing to be done about it, and the thought would probably always taunt her, she didn't regret it. Blair knew, though, her future was set, and as soon as they found the old wise woman, she would be back on her journey toward her future, prosperous or miserable. That moment in the woods would stay frozen in her memory for the rest of her life, but Blair knew that in her memory was where it would have to remain.

Maybe in another life things could have been perfect for Blair, as well as James, but that wasn't the life they were in. They were responsible for making do with the cards they were dealt. Blair sat up straighter on the horse and lifted her chin, pushing her emotions back. She shifted her mind back to the wise woman, knowing she had better start right then and there, acting as if that kiss had never happened. Fate had not paved a happy road for her, but she hoped she could at least provide one for her sisters. And that had to be what she pinned her happiness on.

Not love.

Not romance.

Saving her poor sisters from a life of servitude, or worse, no life at all.