Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

James had become comfortable in the darkness. He had also become comfortable over the years doing the things that, if caught, would cost him dearly. He had even gotten used to the level of guilt that came with living a life predicated on deceit and lies. James tried to make every decision based on the betterment of himself or others, doing the things that may be against the rules, but for positive and righteous reasons. Doing those things required him to be comfortable in the metaphorical darkness, as well as the physical.

However, the forest he was moving carefully through, his only guidance being the sliver light from above, and the trickling of the stream to his right, was not like any place he had seen before. That darkness had almost a magical quality to it. It was as if one wrong step and they would be forever sucked into the void in front of them. And while he heard not a chirp or chortle from any insect or creature, he felt like something was hidden within the billowing folds of darkness before them.

Riding would have been far too treacherous for either of them, but James only realized that when they dove deep into the thick of the forest. He wasn't sure how Blair knew it ahead of time, but he was glad he had followed her intuition. There were secrets he knew Blair was keeping, but he wasn't afraid of them. He knew her well enough to know whatever they were, they were innocent, and nothing that could lead him to a sudden death. Blair cared for others, which was partly what drove her to find the wise woman in the woods.

He knew that Blair thought he had questioned helping her, but he never really did. He was afraid for her, that was why he initially had told her no. However, he knew where she was headed, and he knew she would never again have the chance she had in that moment. He knew just how important finding the truth, and finding a way to help her sisters was. Who was he to hold secrets against anyone, anyway? He had far too many of his own. Secrets that Blair didn't know, but she would soon discover, if they ever were to make it back to the camp and have the guards believe their story.

James and Blair walked in silence far beyond the point where the guards might hear them. It was partly out of caution, not just because of the guards, but because they had no idea what lurked in the darkness of that forest. It was also because James didn't know what to say to Blair. She seemed lost in her own thoughts, the same way she had been since he woke her after the guards had gone to sleep. There was something different. Her hands no longer trembled, her heart slowed in her chest, and she had a knowing look in her eye. It was as if any questions she had about taking the risk they were taking had been quieted somehow in her sleep.

Part of James was envious of that. He had many things he would think about, memories he replayed from his past, and questions about their journey he wished the darkness of the dream world would take from him. Yet, night after night, he would lay restlessly in his bed, knowing deep down there was unfinished business in his own past, and that he would never find peace until he fixed what he had done. Taking Blair to her new home was the beginning of that past business. It was a step he had refused to take for a long time. However, Blair being thrust into the center of it made him realize the time for hiding was over. The time for growing and finding strength had been accomplished, and it was time he stood brave and ready to fix his past, and everything that came with it.

A whistle lightly sounded behind him. James slowed to a stop, petting his horse's nose to keep it calm within the dark. He kept his hand on the horse as he turned back toward Blair. She pulled the hood down from her head, and James realized there was enough light to see her face again. Her hair was braided to one side, and a small cut nicked her cheek. James reached up and wiped a drop of blood from it. "You cut yerself."

Blair's cheeks went bright at his touch and she nodded, wiping it with the sleeve of her cloak. "Aye. One of the branches got me. I'm fine. Just a scratch. You, on the other hand, look like ye got in a fight with a cat."

She chuckled and walked forward, taking the edge of her sleeve and wiping the blood from the small cuts across his face. His eyes stayed focused directly on her, and there was something about being out there, far away from home, all alone with Blair, that brought out an emotion in him he had desperately tried to suppress. Her eyes shifted up to his, and down again, her cheeks reddening.

When she pulled her hand back down, Blair took in a deep breath and looked over at the tree next to her. She ran her fingers over the bark. "Look. We've reached the part of the forest that is beginning to change colors. We still have a bit of walkin' to do. We should probably find a place to sleep fer the rest of the night and start again at daybreak. The guards are far in the distance at this point."

James shook the trance he found himself in, away. "Yeah, yes. We'll go a little further and if we don't find any clearin's, we'll make some space."

Blair smiled and nodded, reaching out and putting her hand on the horse's side. As James made his way back to the front, a flutter surged through his chest and he smirked, taking the horse's reins. For so long, James had lived for those small moments here and there, ones that were shared only between the two of them, and never spoken about afterwards. It was difficult to keep his feelings for Blair at bay, but he knew that he had no other choice. Even the smallest bit of hope was dangerous for him when it came to Blair. There was far too much at stake, including both of their lives.

They had walked so far, in such deep silence and darkness, that Blair had no choice but to focus on the movement of the horse. She rode its steps, felt its muscles as they clenched and turned. The soft hair beneath her palm soothed the anxiety as it rubbed back and forth with each step. They were far from danger at that point, as the guards would have caught up to them, had they heard them leave, but there was no sign or sound of the men.

Blair knew that with the guard's fear of their Laird, they would risk scratch and gash by riding hard through the night, had they thought they had lost her. It was a momentary relief, and she knew it would only last for so long. Still, her courage stood, moving deeper and deeper, following the sounds of the twisting stream into the thick of the forest.

Not too long after James and Blair had paused to discuss finding a place to sleep, James brought the horse to a stop. Blair stood still, making sure he was stopping for the night, and not for caution. When he turned and walked toward her, she let out a breath. James opened the side bag on his horse and pulled out a small wooden box. As the moon cleared the clouds for a moment, he opened it and lifted a small lamp from inside.

"Come with me," he whispered, taking her hand.

He walked Blair several feet away and stood her next to a tree. He glanced back at the horse and to her again. "Stay right here for just a moment, outside of the circle of light."

Blair nodded, realizing he was only being cautious, figuring if he lit the lamp and someone saw him, they would not immediately see her as well. She watched with almost admiration as he walked back over and lit the lamp, pausing for a moment, before searching the area around them. With his leather boots, he moved the piles of leaves away from the trunk of a fallen tree, wiping the base of it free from twigs and branches.

He then pulled out a blanket from his horse and turned down the lamp until it was barely noticeable. James looked up for where he left Blair and motioned for her to come forward. She glanced back and forth and gently stepped through the leaves, taking his hand.

"We can't start a fire, as it might bring too much attention. We'll have to stay warm…together."

Blair kept herself from giggling and instead, pulled out the small satchel of meat and bread, taking a seat on the log. James unraveled the blanket and wrapped it over her shoulders, sitting down next to her. She handed him a piece of the bread, and he looked at her curiously. "Have you been hoarding rations?"

Blair chuckled. "No. One of the servants gave it to me in case I didn't have everything I needed."

James nodded. "Smart. She didn't know who was escorting you, or how you would be treated. Well, it has come in handy."

"Indeed," Blair replied, chewing a piece of bread.

The two sat quietly, eating, listening to the stream bubbling close by. With the danger at a distance, and the travel on hold until dawn, Blair suddenly became very aware of her proximity to James. Not only was he sitting very close to her, but she realized that she had never been that close and that alone with a man before. Sure, she had spent countless hours learning how to fight with him at the castle, but they rarely were that close, and rarely were they that alone.

Even if the guards were to notice right then, it would be past dawn before they could reach them. Blair had always been close to James, and had always felt those nagging emotions pulling at her, but she had always pushed them away almost immediately. She knew there was no way for her to be with James. It would not only be dangerous for her, but for him as well, so it was always best to push those feelings aside.

As Blair attempted to push those feelings back again, she wrapped the rest of the food and tucked it into her cloak. She pulled the cloak tight around her, shivering, even beneath the blanket. James eyed her for a moment and shook his head. He stood up and opened the blanket, sitting down even closer to Blair. He wrapped the blanket around the both of them, and his arms around her. Blair's proper instincts attempted to surface, knowing she should not be that close to him, feeling his whole body wrapped around her, but the warmth it brought was far too sweet to push away.

In James' arms, Blair found more than just warmth, though. She found comfort, security, and the feeling that no matter where the next day or week led her, she was right where she should have always been. So much of her wanted to tell James that, to expose her heart to him, but she knew it would make no difference. Her place was with another man, and there was nothing either of them could do to change that.

Blair leaned her head against James' shoulder, relaxing her body into him. She could feel the tension rising feverish between them. James gripped her tightly, patting her shoulders awkwardly.

"Relax," Blair whispered. "We can rest here, and our warmth will keep us whole through the cold early mornin' hours."

She could feel James nod, his arms and body finally relaxing. Blair knew James cared for her, but she couldn't fathom why someone of no blood relation would risk their very lives to help her. Normally, she wouldn't ask such questions, but she knew James better than she knew anyone, except for her sisters. She tilted her head up and looked at his face, his eyes scanning the forest around them.

"James?" she whispered.

He glanced down at her. "Yes?"

She pressed her lips together, throwing out the question. "I 'spose I am wonderin' why ye would risk yer life fer me to find answers. I mean, not even fer an answer that will necessarily help me?"

James stared at her for several moments, his eyes roving over her face. Slowly he reached his hand up from the covers and caressed the side of her cheek. Without any words, he leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. Blair felt fire explode within her, and she didn't even try to pull away, not even for a second. She closed her eyes and leaned into him, feeling his soft lips against hers. His arms squeezed her tighter into him as he held his mouth firmly to hers.

Blair felt as if her whole body were floating high above the thick forest, far beyond the reaches of her uncle, lifting off into her and James' own little world. As his arms loosened, he pulled back and stared at her for a second before kissing the top of her head. His arms pulled her gently against him, and she rested her head against his chest. He didn't exactly answer her question, not with words anyway.

Blair didn't know what that kiss meant. She didn't know what it would mean in the future, but under the foreign night sky and wavering tree limbs, she refused to think about it. For once in her life, she was going to take something good and let it simmer inside of her, enjoying it far longer than she would ever let herself to enjoy things before. For one night it was just her and James in their own world, with no one to tell them what they could or could not do. For one night, she could care for James without fear.