Chapter 21 - Gina

The first sensation I am aware of is warmth. I’m wrapped in something very soft and extremely comfortable. The light beyond my closed eyes is very bright, making me not want to open them.

What happened?

The last thing I remember is running with Bailey, the cold air in my face and the breathtaking sight of moon-shimmered snow.

When I try to move, it feels like I have bricks attached to my every limb. My joints are aching, and my muscles refuse to move.

I open my eyes slowly, groaning a little at the effort. When I see the clear, white, fluorescent lights and the bright sun angling through the side windows, I realize where I am.

I’m in a hospital! What happened to me? Is my baby okay?

I try to sit up, but my body quickly lets me know that’s not going to happen. I feel dull. Helpless and confused.

“Don’t try to get up, Gina. You need to rest.”

“Bae?” I ask, turning towards the sound of his voice. To my shock, he’s sitting right next to me, watching me with a closed expression. His usually bright eyes are dark and cold, and I swallow down a nervous gulp.

Does he know?

“Why didn’t you tell me, Gina?”

I hang my head, looking anywhere but into his face. I can’t bear the hurt I can see lurking deep in his gaze. If he was animated, yelling and upset, I might be able to take it better, but this quiet, defeated look is cutting me to the bone.

“I haven’t known that long, myself. I was just figuring out how to tell you. Also, I saw Jill and—”

“And what?” Jill asks from the doorway. I look up in shock to see her standing there, leaning casually against the wall, a catty smile plastered across her face.

“What is she doing here?” I ask, swallowing down a lump of pure sorrow.

“She found me walking out of the woods with you passed out in my arms. She drove us to the hospital,” Bailey says in a clipped tone.

I look away for a moment, closing my eyes. This is too painful to bear. All of those happy moments Bae and I shared over the last few weeks were a lie. Every single one. It’s Jill he really wants, and the entire pack has been hiding it from me.

“Gina, you need to talk to me,” Bae says, his voice growing more heated, and I turn to look at him. “I don’t want to cause you any more stress, but I need you to explain yourself.”

“What happened?” I ask, changing the subject. “Is the baby okay?” I put my arms around my belly, wishing I could feel something, but I know it’s too early to feel the baby move.

Bailey nods. “Yes, the baby is fine. The doctor is on rounds and will be here in an hour to talk with you. When I brought you in last night, he shared everything with me because I’m your husband.”

He stares at me steadily, his expression not changing at all. “Do you have any idea what it was like for me to have him tell me you were pregnant?”

“I told you, I only just found out,” I say, my voice getting harder. “It’s not like I purposefully hid this for months. It must be very early days now, which is why I’m concerned. Why did I pass out?”

“Just fatigue,” Baily answers. “You’ll have to take some supplements, eat better, and rest a lot more. At this stage, it wasn’t too dangerous, but it will be if you keep pushing too hard.”

“You really should take better care of yourself, Gina,” Jill says, shaking her head. “You need to think of your child.”

I glare at her over Bae’s head, and for just a fraction of a second, her soft, concerned look is replaced by a mean grin.

“Bae, I’m sorry this happened,” I say. “I’m also sorry I didn’t go to a doctor right away. It’s just that I was shocked when I found out, and honestly, it’s not even been a week, so—”

“But you’re my wife,” Bae says softly. “Why didn’t you run straight to me and tell me immediately?”

He’s staring right into my eyes, and I can see all the intensity that we share when we’re making love. All my memories surface, flooding my senses—I can feel his touch and taste his tongue, lost in the rush that floods me when I’m caught in his passion.

Then my eyes flick up at Jill, still standing in the doorway. Should I bring it up that she’s the reason I didn’t tell him? Immediately after I found out, that was when she came and told me about her history with Bae.

“Gina.” Bae leans forward and takes my hand. There is warmth in his face now, but also an urgency that wasn’t there before. He might want to be with Jill. This baby might be the worst thing that could happen to him.

All my fears of the baby tying us together while Bailey is unwilling to be with me come crashing down at me, sending fear running through my blood.

I can’t take this. I can’t!

The idea of all of those perfect mornings and long, lazy nights in bed being a lie is crushing me, killing me.

This is worse than high school. So much worse.

“Gina,” Bae says, much harder this time. His eyes are glowing like lasers now, the softness draining out of him as he gets more impatient.

Of course he’s impatient. He wants to get out of here with Jill.

“Tell me the truth!” he says, letting go of my hand to rake his fingers through his hair. “I know why you hid this from me, I just need to hear you say it!”

Now, the fear in me feels like ice water running through my veins. I think I’m actually going to be sick.

If he says right here and now that he’s with Jill and always has been…

“You want to leave,” he says. “You want to break the mate bond and go back to Denver. That’s why you hid this from me. You don’t want us to be tied together in any possible way.”

The words hit me with a brutal shock. I shake my head, but Bae isn’t done.

“You were going to make a fool of me,” he says. “You were planning to leave me from the start.”

So this is it. This is how he dumps me—again!

Bae’s face is such a mess of emotion, I can’t tell what he’s really feeling. When I glance up at Jill, she looks so triumphant and satisfied, I can only assume the worst. The pain in me starts to solidify into anger, into confidence and strength.

Fine, this is how you want it? I can do it on my own if I have to!

My thoughts are pure bravado to cover my breaking heart, but it’s all I’ve got right now.

“Do you want to break the mate bond?” Bae asks, his voice firm. The words hit like physical blows, but it’s obvious this is what he wants.

He never cared about me. He’s only with me because he has to be. This is all my worst fears coming true!

“Yes, Bae. I want to break the mate bond.”

The silence that echoes through the room then is deeper than a cold lake on a winter’s night. Jill smiles again before her fake expression of concern settles back onto her face.

“Fine,” Bae says. “We’ll break it, and then you can do whatever you want.”

I feel so trembly and sick, I know I’m about to cry, but I’ll be damned if I cry in front of Bailey and Jill.

I can’t believe he just let me go like this and didn’t even try to work it out. He didn’t even fight for me!

“There’s going to be a lot we need to work out,” Bae says. His voice is even, and his eyes are cold. “Obviously, I want to be involved, and we need to make sure you’re taken care of. I’ll need to speak with the elders. They did threaten you with banishment.”

It’s all been planned, every detail. All of them want to get rid of me.

Jill smiles, then covers her mouth. I glare at her, wishing I could blame all of this on her.

But it’s Bae who doesn’t want me. How can that really be her fault?

“Once the doctor comes back, we’ll talk,” Bae says. “About our future options.”

I can’t take another second of his steely eyes and tense face. I never imagined he could be so upset with me, or so cruel as to choose Jill right in front of me.

“Bae, I need you to leave.”

“What?”

“You and Jill, you both have to go.”

“Why?” Bae stares at me, daring me to defy him.

“You’re stressing me out!” I cry, finally losing my cool. “You’re stressing me out, and the baby. After the doctor has seen me, I’ll get them to give you an update. Until then, you need to give me some space and let me rest.”

Bae looks me over as if he wants to tie me down to make sure I don’t run off with his baby. He gets up slowly and walks to the door.

“I’ll be back,” he says. “There is still a lot we need to talk about.”

“Come on, Bae,” Jill says gently, rubbing his arm. “Let’s get out of here. I’ll buy you some breakfast, and we can talk.”

Bae lets Jill lead him away. The sight of them so close to each other is a brand-new blade turning in my chest.

They make a cute couple.

The thought is so bitter, it seems to sour my mind entirely. I curl up, holding my belly and saying how sorry I am… this child was conceived in love, or so I thought. Now I know it was a bed of lies, and this poor baby will grow up with parents split apart instead of a stable, loving home.

Tears start to trickle down my cheeks, bitter and stinging. I realize I don’t have anywhere to stay, and the idea of getting discharged and going back to Bae’s makes me feel extremely anxious. I sit up and grab the phone by the bed.

“Hello?” my brother answers on the first ring.

“Jack.” I can barely talk, with all the sobs caught in my throat.

“Gina! Are you alright? Are you still in the hospital?”

“Yes, I’m waiting to see the doctor. But Bae and I… well, we had a fight. I can’t go back to his place. And I don’t want to go home—Mom will smother me. Can I stay at yours?”

“Of course. It’s a bachelor pad, though. Be prepared for wet towels on the floor and cups and spoons left randomly around the house.”

“How is that different from growing up with you?” I say, giggling despite everything.

“That’s fair,” Jack laughs. “When do you want me to come and get you?”

“Soon, I think. I mean, the doctor might even want to keep me in a few more days, I’m not sure. I just really wanted to know I had a safe place to go when they let me out.”

“Of course you do.” Jack’s voice is soft. “I’ve got you. I’ve always got you, lil’ bub.”

His use of my childhood pet name tears me up all over again. I know Jack feels bad about never standing up for me in high school, and he’s been trying to make up for it ever since.

“Thank you, Jack.”

“No problem. I’ll be there soon.”

Jack hangs up, and I curl up in bed, hugging my pillow and letting my misery consume me. I am not looking forward to my next conversation with Bae or any of the hard times ahead, but I know I have to start taking better care of myself and figure all of this out. For my baby.

From now on, the baby is what comes first, and I can’t let my hurt feelings put my child in danger.