13. Harper

13 /

harper

Luca left around noon to go to a photo shoot. He was vague about it, but I understood. I hated team photo sessions because they always made me feel ridiculous, and the photographers were always condescending and slow. Luca had promised to text when he got home, and since I was exhausted from the most incredible night of my life, I went back to bed.

The pleasant soreness of my ass was a constant reminder of what we'd shared, and I hoped we'd get together later. Regardless of what else we did, I needed more of what I'd been missing for years. Having him inside me was key, but the way he'd taken charge and controlled me touched a spot so deep that even his cock couldn't reach it. It seemed almost unbelievable that I'd found someone who not only wanted to fuck me, but also got off on the very things I'd craved for so long. Maybe I'd even get another spanking.

As I woke from my nap, my thoughts drifted back to last night. The memory of our date unfolded gently—discovering Luca was an athlete, falling in love with his laughter, deepening our connection. The evening had been magical, especially our time in the rooftop garden.

Then there was the sex. Everything that happened after we came to my apartment built steadily into the most memorable night of my life. I remembered it in layers, and each recollection was burned indelibly into my memory.

The sex had been mind-boggling. Taking his dick was uncomfortable at first, but the feeling quickly morphed into pleasure so intense it robbed me of my sanity. While he held me down and plowed me like a madman, I begged, moaned, and spewed all kinds of filth, which only made what we were doing hotter. Being under his control was profoundly satisfying. Before last night, I wondered if I'd built getting fucked into something so enormous that reality could never match it, but Luca had shown me I hadn't even imagined how good it could possibly be.

Our perfect date had combined with immense sexual gratification to create something deeper, a connection that made my heart trill when I thought about it. We'd fallen into a rhythm that felt natural instead of contrived for the moment. Scary, yes—but more thrilling than I was prepared to admit.

No longer sleepy, I padded downstairs and made afternoon coffee and toast. While I ate, I wondered how Luca's day was going. Was he thinking about me? A sudden wave of paranoia hit me in the gut. Would he regret asking me to date? Did he ask in a haze of lust? Was he already trying to think of a way to back out? I hoped not, but what if he didn't text later? My heart would be demolished. After a sip of coffee, I shook my head. I couldn't control what Luca thought, but even if he'd changed his mind, he wouldn't leave me hanging. He was too good to do that.

I raced back upstairs and found my phone in the shorts I'd worn last night. I needed advice, and who better to turn to than the guy with whom I shared the weirdest relationship ever? After pulling up his contact info, I smiled at the photo. I'd taken it last year on a roadie when we all went to a holiday parade. He was sticking out his tongue, and his eyes were as bright as the snowflakes dotting his dark hair. Eckie had at different times turned me on like crazy and infuriated me so much I wanted to punch him senseless. We'd been teammates at Mohegan, but in Bethesda, we became best friends.

HARPER: I have a question.

After two minutes without a reply, I reached for the TV remote. As soon as I picked it up, the phone buzzed.

ECKIE: Dude. Way to catch me in the middle of helping Levi off the toilet.

Levi was Eckie and his husband Jack's young son. I laughed, imagining Eckie helping Levi clean up with one hand and texting me with the other.

HARPER: Do you need to get back to me later?

ECKIE: Nope. We're all done.

HARPER: Wash your hands?

ECKIE: Wouldn't you like to know? It's great hearing from you. What's up?

Eckie and I had been road roomies for the last two years, and we'd told each other more crazy shit than I could believe. I knew I could trust him because not a word had ever gotten back to me.

HARPER: Short version. There's this guy I met named Luca. He asked if we could date. I said yes but now I'm afraid.

ECKIE: Harpy! You haven't wasted any time up there. Why are you talking to me? Go get laid.

Leave it to Eckie, always trying to get me into somebody's bed.

HARPER: Already accomplished, but you know why I'm scared.

ECKIE: Because you looked in the mirror?

HARPER: Fuck you.

ECKIE: You looked at your team pic from last year?

While I was laughing, another message came through.

ECKIE: I know why you're scared, but you can't be this way all your life.

Eckie knew, all right. One night over too many beers, I'd told him the entire depressing story of my love life.

HARPER: What if Luca's thinking he asked too soon?

A minute passed, and when a message came in, it was a picture of Levi singing with his toy karaoke machine. He had KISS-style makeup all over his face. I laughed so hard it took a minute to type a reply.

HARPER: I can only imagine who did that to him.

ECKIE: LOL. I take the Fifth.

ECKIE: You want to date Luca, right? You're ready to put yourself back out there and find someone.

HARPER: Yes, but dating him means risking my heart. What if he turns out to be like the others? He could be thinking about how to back out right now.

ECKIE: No risk, no goal. And if you know him well enough to say yes already, go with it.

I'd been hoping he might say… Hell, I didn't know what I hoped he'd say.

HARPER: You don't think I should be careful? You've had your heart broken so you know what it's like.

ECKIE: Yes, and I also know I wouldn't have Jack if I'd kept my heart under lock and key for the rest of my life. You know I made a ton of mistakes, but following my instincts with Jack was the best thing I ever did.

HARPER: So you think I should date Luca? Open up to possibilities?

There was another pause, followed by an incoming text with a picture of Eckie and Levi grinning at the camera.

ECKIE: That's us, right now, smiling at Uncle Harpy. Look, you and I have been through thick and thin, and I won't BS you. You need someone who cares about you to say go for it. Put your heart the fuck out there and see what happens. Things might fizzle or he might hurt you. You could hurt him. But it's also possible you could be happy, and you deserve that. Now get over yourself and see if Luca will be the one who breaks your losing streak.

I scrubbed a hand over the back of my neck. Eckie was right. It was time to choose the possibility of happiness over the dread of heartbreak.

HARPER: I don't know how you got so fucking smart, but you're right. If I don't start dating, I'll never find the right guy.

ECKIE: There you go. Now, like I said at the beginning, go get laid. Text me in a few days and let me know how it's going.

After we said our goodbyes, I thought about what Eckie had said—no risk, no goal. I might come up short again, not be a keeper, but I liked Luca. He was kind and sweet, not to mention the sex god I'd dreamed about for so long. Even if things didn't last, he liked me for now, so I raised the phone and typed a message.

HARPER: I had such an amazing time with you. Want to grab dinner tonight?

If he was working with the photographer, he wouldn't see my text for a while, so I took my phone back downstairs to finish my coffee. It wasn't long before the phone vibrated.

LUCA: That sounds perfect. I've been missing you.

The relief was as intense as jumping into a pool on a hot day. I didn't expect anything long-term with Luca, but maybe—just maybe—he'd stay long enough to help me stop feeling like the biggest loser the world had ever known. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. For the first time in a long time, I was willing to take a chance.