Chapter 4

When I parked at the inn, I wasn't ready to go up to my room. I never had any issues going home to my apartment. Probably because it was an extension of work. Now that I'd taken leave, I didn't have anything to fill my time. Visiting home raised issues I hadn't given myself space and time to consider.

I wanted to see the fountain that Aiden showed me the night before, so I entered the gardens, breathing in the cool night air, as I followed the path to the center and the bench I'd shared with Aiden.

I closed my eyes, listening to the comforting sound of the water trickling into the fountain.

"What are you doing?" Aiden asked.

I startled, my eyes flying open.

Aiden stood a few feet away with his palms up. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

I forced myself to relax. "It's okay. I just came here to think."

"You spent the day with your family?" Aiden asked as he sat next to me, his knees spread wide.

I nodded. "My dad, Jameson, Daphne, and Izzy. It's nice to have time with them. I haven't seen Teddy or Weston yet. I'm sure they're busy with work."

Aiden shifted, the length of his thigh resting against mine. "When I came home, my grandmother had died and my parents were already gone."

"Does it take some time to get used to the changes?" I asked, trying to ignore the heat I felt through his jeans.

Aiden gave me a look. "I kept expecting my parents to show up."

I covered his hand with mine. "I know how much you hated them."

His jaw tightened. "I wouldn't let them affect me like they used to. I'm a different person."

My heart ached for him. He'd always acted like he was strong, like his mother's words hadn't gotten to him. But on some level, they had, or he wouldn't have felt the need to prove himself in the military. "I feel like everyone has changed, and I have no idea who anyone is."

"I guess that's to be expected. You were gone a long time." Aiden's voice rumbled through my chest.

"I feel guilty for not being here when Mom died. I missed everything that came after. I wasn't there for them, and my siblings grew into people I don't know much about. I didn't stick around like Teddy did." The guilt clawed at my throat.

"You didn't do anything wrong. You did what you had to do."

"I saved myself." I lifted my feet to the bench and wrapped my arms around my bent knees, dropping my forehead onto my arms.

Aiden shifted on the bench, his hand coming to rest on my shin. His touch was comforting and grounding. "I don't know what to say to make you feel better."

Tears stung the back of my eyes. "I just have to feel it, I guess. Maybe have a conversation with the siblings I left behind. Apologize for being selfish. For thinking that I could bury myself in classes and work so that I didn't feel the loss."

"You didn't do anything wrong," Aiden said again. "You coped the only way you knew how."

"But Teddy changed schools to be closer to home. He was there, and I wasn't."

"What did Teddy give up to be there for his family? Did he give up on his dreams? Did he shove them down deep so that he never saw them again? Or was it something he wanted to do? We can't speculate."

Lifting my head, I blinked my eyes, wondering if he was right. Our actions had consequences, and I didn't know what Teddy was going through. "While I'm here, I want to get to know them."

"When I enlisted, I told my best friend, Heath, to look after Marley, and he ended up falling in love with her. He broke things off when they were younger and only just now reconnected."

"Marley turned out just fine. She went to college, runs a successful business."

"You're right. She can support herself. She doesn't need me. That's a tough pill to swallow sometimes. It makes me feel—"

"Useless?" That's how I felt since I was home. That I wasn't doing anything right, work or relationships.

Aiden sighed. "Something like that."

I knew some men liked to be needed. Maybe it was hard for him to know that his little sister didn't need him in the same way she did when they were growing up.

I set my feet on the ground. "We're both a mess from our childhoods." Although mine had been nice. It was just Mom's illness and death that had thrown me for a loop.

"We'll have to stick together," Aiden said as he looked up at the sky where a million stars shone.

We were quiet for a few minutes, both lost in our thoughts.

Finally, I asked, "How are things going with the inn?"

"I feel like I'm barely holding my head above water some days. The tasks are endless, and then I'm constantly being interrupted by the phone or a guest that needs to check in, or there's a problem with the room."

I could tell him to hire someone, but he'd already said that wasn't possible. "You want me to take a look at things? I used to oversee the running of the hotels. I'd fly to the location, evaluate how everything was run, and make recommendations for improvements. My boss loved to cut costs, so that was a big part of the equation. I'm used to being cautious with my advice."

"You would do that? Aren't you supposed to be on a break?"

I sighed. "I need to keep busy, or I'm going to go crazy."

"I can show you around tomorrow. We're heading into the busiest part of the holiday season, and Marley has all these ideas. Maybe you can help me sort through them, figure out which ones could work and which ones won't."

"I'd love to."

"She wants to show old holiday movies in the great room."

I smiled. "I kind of love that idea. The black-and-white versions?"

"I guess so."

"That seems like an easy offering. You play the movie and serve popcorn and drinks?"

"Do we have enough seating to accommodate everyone? Will anyone be interested in attending? I'm also wondering if we should renovate the old movie theater in the basement."

I shifted on the bench, remembering how we'd sneak into the back and make out while the movie ran in the background. "I have so many good memories of that place."

"Gram used it at some point, but when the projector broke, she never replaced it."

"How neat would it be to open it up again?" I asked, excitement shooting through me.

"No one's been in that room in years. It would need a lot of work. I'm not even sure it's possible to make it what you're envisioning."

I closed my eyes. "I'm thinking of red velvet chairs, a large movie screen, and black-and-white holiday movies. I can practically smell the popcorn."

"I'll show it to you tomorrow. Then we can go from there. But in the meantime, I'd like to see if it's possible to show the movies in the great room."

"I'd love to help." For the first time since I realized I wasn't getting the promotion, I felt excitement. I hadn't felt that with my job. For so long, I was held back by red tape, money concerns, and others who didn't have the same vision that I did. Not that Aiden would necessarily be different. But there were less people involved. It was just Aiden and Marley. I had a feeling they'd be motivated by what their guests would enjoy. I'd be limited by whatever their budget was, but I hoped we could reopen the theater.

"I appreciate you taking your time to look at it. I know you're here to reconnect with your family. I feel bad putting you to work."

I rested my hand on his thigh. "Don't be. I haven't been this excited about something in a long time. But I need to get to bed. I'm exhausted."

Aiden stood and held his hand out to me. "I'll walk you back."

I placed my hand in his, feeling the warmth of his palm. My heart contracted as he closed his hand over mine. It felt like old times when we'd walk holding hands. I hadn't cared where we were, only that we were together. I'd felt his love even if we couldn't show it in public. "I love the holiday decorations. They make the place warm and inviting."

"We advertise that we're next to a Christmas tree farm, so Marley insists on trees on every floor. I think she'd prefer trees in every room."

"You could offer that as an additional service. For extra money, you get a decorated room."

Aiden chuckled. "That's not a bad idea."

"I'm used to working with a large hotel chain. We were constrained by bureaucracy and a modern decor. But here?" I nodded toward the grand porch. "We have so many possibilities."

We headed inside, and he stopped when we reached my door.

He dropped my hand and shoved his in his pockets. "Do you put a tree up in your place in the city?"

"I never have the time. I wasn't home long enough to enjoy it, and I had no one to share it with."

"Now that you're here, and helping me with this place, I'd like to show you some of the holiday events. The Monroes have a light display."

My breath caught. That sounded like a date. But he'd said it was payback for me helping him. I could have told him I was busy or that I had a million other things to do while I was home, but I wanted to see the lights with him. "That sounds nice."

Aiden grinned, and I was struck by how handsome he was. No longer the boy I dated, he was all man. For a second, I almost wished for more. But this was two old friends reconnecting. It wasn't our second chance at love. I couldn't forget how he ended things. He'd turned down my proposal of marriage. There was no getting over the humiliation of that. "Good night, Aiden."

"Night, Fiona," he murmured as I shut the door firmly.

Our relationship had been over for years. There was no reason to think of starting things up again. My life was in Chicago, and his was here.

* * *

The next morning, I got up early, showered, and drank my coffee in front of the window facing the front of the property. I'd seen Aiden go for his morning run. But I hadn't seen him come back. Not that I was stalking him or anything. I was just bored.

I'd checked my emails, disappointed not to see any from work. I'd hoped they'd say they reconsidered and thought I deserved a promotion or even a raise. Or at least an email saying to cut my vacation short, that they needed me back. But there was nothing. I'd never felt more expendable than I did now. I always thought my work was valued, but now I wasn't so sure.

A red truck with lettering on the passenger side door rumbled down the lane. There was a tree in the bed. I wondered if Marley had ordered another tree for the inn.

At some point, I'd need to meet Aiden to check out the theater, but I didn't have any set time for that, and there was nothing else on my to-do list.

A few minutes later, there was a soft knock on the door. I looked through the peephole and saw Aiden. I opened the door. "Aiden, what are you—"

He was carrying a tree along with another man.

"That's for me?" I asked as I moved out of the way.

Aiden strode inside. "I thought you could use a tree while you're staying here."

They set it against the dresser, and the second man placed a tree stand on the floor.

"You remember Heath."

"How could I forget your best friend?" I said, wondering if Heath knew about us.

Heath threw a thumb over his shoulder. "This guy thought you needed a little holiday cheer."

I smiled. "This should do it, but I don't have any decorations."

"Let me get the tree up first. I have some extra decorations downstairs," Aiden said.

I sat on the edge of the bed. "You thought of everything."

Heath grinned. "We take our holiday cheer seriously around here."

Aiden looked up at him from where he knelt on the floor. "Are you going to help get this tree up, or you just going to talk?"

Heath chuckled. "I'm helping. Don't get your panties in a wad."

Aiden grumbled something too low for me to hear.

I liked their banter. "You and Marley are engaged?"

"He used to be my best friend. But now he's Marley's," Aiden said when he stood and backed up to see if the tree was straight. "A little to the right."

Heath adjusted the tree in the stand. "I'm still your best friend. Although you've been a grumpy ass lately."

"Everyone seems like a grump to you now that you're in a relationship," Aiden said.

"Mmm. How's that?" Heath gestured at the tree.

I went to stand next to Aiden. "I think that's good."

"Me too," Aiden agreed before bending to pick up the needles that had fallen when they brought the tree inside. "I can clean up the rest. Let me grab the decorations and the vacuum. I'll be right back."

Then Aiden was gone, leaving me with Heath.

He leaned against the dresser, resting one leg over the other. "So you're a Calloway?"

I chuckled. "Is that going to be a problem?"

Heath raised a brow. "Not for me. But my brothers might not like me giving a Calloway a tree."

I couldn't help but smile. "I can get my own. Is that right?"

"Something like that. But you're Aiden's, so—"

I shook my head. "Oh, I'm not Aiden's."

Heath sobered. "He said you had a thing back in high school. I didn't know, and I was his best friend."

"We wanted to avoid the gossip. You know how mean the kids were back then." They made comments about Aiden, saying he was trailer trash. If we'd been vocal about our relationship, it would only have gotten worse. And I didn't want my dad to tell me I couldn't date him. It was better to keep it hidden.

"I can't judge. I had a secret fling of my own with Marley. I've always regretted how I handled things back then."

"What did Aiden say about us?" I asked, but Aiden came into the room with a vacuum and a box he placed on the bed. I hoped Aiden hadn't told him how I'd proposed and he'd said no.

"I'll let you get back to whatever you had going on today," Aiden said to Heath.

I wondered if he wanted to be alone with me.

Heath straightened. "Selling Christmas trees?"

"Yeah, that," Aiden said with a nod.

"It was nice to see you again," I said to Heath.

"Come see our light display. It will get you in the holiday mood for sure."

"You aren't worried I'll take all your secrets and share them with my brothers?" I couldn't help but tease.

"There aren't many secrets to a holiday light display, and Talon made it by hand. So I doubt you could replicate it. I think it's about time we move past some of that stuff."

"What would Emmett have to say about that?" Aiden asked.

Heath frowned. "Emmett will come around, eventually."

"I appreciate you accepting my sister."

"She's good for Cole. I wouldn't stand in their way." Heath exchanged a look with Aiden. Then he said, "I'll see you around."

After Heath closed the door with a soft click, I said, "He said he knows about us."

Aiden sighed. "We've talked since I've been back. I told Cole too. When he was having trouble with Daphne."

"It's weird that people know about us. It's been a secret for so long."

He plugged in the vacuum. "You don't mind that I talked to him, do you?"

I let out a breath. "I guess not."

"I'll vacuum. Why don't you see if you like any of the decorations in there." He nodded toward the box.

I opened the lid, pulling out lights, then ornaments. I set each one on the bed.

When the vacuum turned off, Aiden moved to stand next to me. "These are old ornaments. The ones my grandma put on her tree."

"Are you sure you want me to use them? Shouldn't they be in your apartment?"

"I don't put up a tree."

I raised a brow. "Yet you thought I needed one?"

"You can help me put one in my apartment too if it bothers you," Aiden said lightly.

I bumped shoulders with him. "I think that's a great idea. If I have to have holiday cheer, then so do you."

Aiden moved, and I thought for one brief second that he was going to kiss me, but he merely snagged the lights. "These need to go on first."

How was I going to be around Aiden when every time he came near, I thought he was going to kiss me? I needed to stuff those feelings down deep, because Aiden didn't feel the same way about me. He'd been abundantly clear about that when we were nineteen.