Chapter 8

I stand firm behind Kai, making it clear Boris doesn’t get to keep doing this. If he wants to come back this time, he’s going to have to prove to all of us that this isn’t who he’s going to be.

My skin itches with the need to get back to her, but I overheard the kid and didn’t want to risk Boris killing him. I don’t think he would, but the child has been through enough. I have no plans of adding the wrath of Daddy B to the list.

What? I said I wouldn't say it to his face. My head is fair game.

Dr. K rounds the corner and locks eyes with Kai. I am sure he needs to talk to someone, and from what I have heard, she’s the best person to go to.

“Kai, can we get that talk I was promised earlier?” she asks.

I can see he’s hesitant as he tucks the gun behind his shirt and conceals it in one swipe.

Would it be weird if I gave him a high five for that move? Because it was smooth.

“Go ahead,” I encourage before turning to Dr. K. “He’s hungry though, none of us have eaten in a while now.”

She gives him a soft smile before nodding.

“Want to go to the cafeteria?”

Kai looks back at me as if asking permission. I nod again, hoping he takes the hint. He needs food and to decompress. He can’t do that with Nessa emotionally vulnerable by his side.

“You can come back when you’re done.”

Relief washes over him, even if Dr. K looks at me disapprovingly. I’ll get him to shower here and have some clothes delivered. This is where he feels safe, and I’m not going to take that away from him.

During the whole exchange, Boris stands to the side, not uttering a word. Now that our attention isn’t fixated on him, it seems like he’s calmed him down a bit.

When Kai and Dr. K walk away, he turns to me. “That kid has some nerve.”

I scoff, barely refraining from punching him in the face, even if it would feel so damn good right now.

“You’re the one that has some nerve. You think you can just walk back through those doors without hell to pay?”

He huffs a breath and tries to shove me out of the way. Grabbing his arm forcefully, I push him to the other side of the hallway. He stumbles, not expecting the move and instantly we go from civilized, okay okay partially civilized , to feral beasts in the blink of an eye.

Fists are thrown, and I swear he cracks one of my teeth, but I’m not going down. I land a few blows of my own, really taking him by surprise when I get a good uppercut to his abdomen. The man has abs of fecking steel, but the blow still made him gasp for air.

I’m about to go in again when a sharp voice cuts through our haze.

“Stop this madness right now.”

Doc approaches from the side and moves to stand between the two of us. “I am a guest in this hospital, and there are others who are very sick all around you. This is not how we will conduct ourselves here.”

I wipe my mouth, tasting blood as I look at the old fella.

“He was just about to tap out anyway, no problem.”

Doc shakes his head, and I think I actually hear Boris growl.

“That is enough,” he snaps at Boris before turning to me. “I have some news I need to deliver to Nessa, and I think the two of you should be there.”

That gets our attention in an instant.

“You can’t give her more bad news,” I say adamantly.

Doc shakes his head. “I won’t keep this from her. You know I respect you both, but I will always stand by the fact that we all get to make our own choices with our own bodies. That includes knowing all the information so that those choices can be made.”

“Is she okay?” Boris asks, and Doc nods.

“I would rather have this discussion only once, as it will not be pleasant.”

I try to take a deep breath before we walk into the room, settling some lingering rage for that cowardly, old man. It takes us both a minute to breathe before walking into the room much more calmly than we have any business pretending to be. Nessa cracks open a sleepy eye as I crawl into the bed beside her.

“You’re here,” she breathes. When she looks more closely, she must see the bruises forming on my face, making her nose wrinkle in confusion.

“We both are,” Boris says, making her rise too quickly from the bed and grab at her abdomen.

“ Lisichka ,” Boris gently scolds, coming to her other side instantly.

“You’re here? You don’t hate me?”

His gaze snaps to hers, a mixture of confusion and guilt crossing his face before returning his eyes to the floor.

“I would never be able to stay away from you.” His hand reaches for hers. “And I could never hate you.”

“Even if it’s my fault she died?”

That has him meeting her eyes and pinching her chin before any of us can blink. “You will never utter those words again,” he growls way too harshly for my liking, but it does seem to get through to her. She nods even as her eyes water.

Gently, he lets go and places a kiss on her forehead.

“I just needed to breathe for a moment, but I am here.”

Nessa relaxes, and Boris pulls the chair up to the side rail so he can be as close as possible without being in the bed. That’s when Nessa finally notices Doc standing off to the side.

“Thanks for saving me,” she breathes. I can practically hear the unspoken words between them.

“I am truly sorry I couldn’t save you both.”

She nods, fiddling with the blanket in her lap. I can tell she’s in pain, so I want to get this conversation over with quickly.

“What do you need to tell us, Doc?”

He glances at the papers in his hands then at Nessa, sorrow once again bleeding through his features. “I wasn’t able to save your uterus. The bullet went straight through, and there were shards splintered into other areas. I could not find the bleeding site in time. In order to save you, I was left with no choice. I had to remove your uterus.”

She stares at him as if she doesn’t know what he is trying to say, but it clicks for Boris and me right away. We glance at each other before her.

“Ness,” I try to say gently, but she rips her hand from my grip.

“No. What does that mean?” Red eyes bore into Doc’s as he swallows.

“You can no longer have children.” Shock is written all over her face, but she says nothing. “I’m sorry, Nessa. I swear to you that I did everyth-”

Nessa holds up her hand as she shakes her head. “Stop apologizing.” She tries to take a few deep breaths, but they get stuck. “T-this is good. Now we don’t have to worry. Now there is no way I can hurt another one of m-my babies.”

“ Lisi -”

“No!” she snaps. “I said stop .”

Her hands shake as she balls them into fists.

“This is good news.” She rolls her lips together, and after a minute, Doc nods and dismisses himself.

“You don’t have to do this, Sweetheart. It’s okay to feel upset.”

Nessa scoffs. “Why would I be upset? This is what I wanted.”

“No, it is not. This is what you thought you wanted until you had the chance to process.” Boris adds.

She pins him with a venomous glare. “Clearly, I processed wrong.”

He shakes his head. “No, you made a choice and it was taken away from you.”

“All of my choices seem to be taken from me. I said I wanted together , and you ran away again ,” she seethes, looking at the old fella.

Then, her pained gaze turns to me.

“And you promised to be my killer and stay by my side, but you left me to watch from the shadows. I keep choosing, but everyone keeps choosing for me!”

It’s my turn to shake my head.

“You would have hated me forever if I had tried to save you from your father.”

Boris leans in, trying to help her see reason. “I could not watch the two of you hurting while there was nothing I could do. I needed space. I needed to think, my little fox. I may have been running, but I came back.”

Nessa laughs sarcastically. “The two of you are just like my father, always calling the shots. I am so done with having the choice taken from me. I am done with the two of you.”

I know exactly what she’s doing right now, but I won’t call her out. If she needs to push us away in order to process her emotions, I will let her make me the bad guy here.

“Get out,” she says so quietly that Boris and I look at each other before responding.

“What?”

“Get out!” This time she yells, pointing towards the door. “You don’t get to be here and kiss it better this time. Nothing will fix this, nothing will fix me!”

“Love, you’re not broken.”

Tears track down her cheeks as she continues to point to the door.

“Out.”

She’s seconds from passing out, her eyes already drooping. I don’t want her to hurt herself or make any of this worse. So, without a word, I get up and leave the room.

Don’t worry, I’m not going far.

The second I’m outside of the door, I sit down beside it. I can hear Nessa yelling, and all too soon, Boris follows, taking up the spot on the other side of the door.

“Has anyone figured out who did this?” I ask Boris.

I haven’t been in touch with anyone, and no one has come to the room yet besides Kai.

“Lev followed the heat signature for a minute, but they disappeared. Everyone was so focused on getting Nessa into the ambulance that by the time they could get back, any trace of them was gone. Lev found some old underground tunnels, but no one was in them.”

I put my arms on my knees as we speak quietly, hoping Nessa falls asleep soon. “This had to be Donovan. Who else would do this?”

“We are missing something, or someone.”

I agree. But who?