Chapter 27

Noah~

A fter Cathal had driven us to our place, I'd had him watch over Shea while I'd gone upstairs to pack us both a bag, and after gathering everything that we'd need, Cathal had gone on his way while I had driven us to Keavy's cabin. Though we used it as our primary armory, the cabin was functional, and while it still looked decrepit from the outside, the inside was very much the opposite.

At any rate, by the time that we had arrived, it'd been close to three in the morning, so instead of forcing Shea to tell me what the fuck was going on, I allowed her to finally get some sleep. Being the stubborn hellcat that she was, she had refused to sleep on the way over because it was stupid to close your eyes around the person that wanted you dead-her words, not mine. However, once we'd gotten inside the cabin, she'd been powerless against her adrenaline crash, though she'd done what she could to fight it. So, after putting her to bed, I'd done one last check of the security system, then had joined her for a few hours of some much-needed sleep.

Now, almost ten hours later, Shea was sitting in a tub full of bath salts and bubble bath, and thank God that Keavy had led the life that she'd had. When I had insisted on running Shea's bath, I'd found everything for a sore body, silently thanking Keavy for not letting Declan take over the cabin completely.

I sat on the toilet as I watched Shea soak in the heat from the water, and I wasn't sure that I'd ever get over how fucking beautiful the woman was, and it wasn't just because she was my wife. Shea was a truly stunning creature, and I'd been too obstinate to appreciate it when Declan had first given me that damn folder on her. I'd been determined to view her as a business transaction only, and I was paying the price, a cost that I might be paying for the rest of my life. I'd told her that I loved her, and in return, she had accused me of saying it to manipulate her some more, something that'd been both true and false.

"Baby, you need to tell me what happened?"

When Shea had finally woken up, we'd barely spoken a word to one another. I had made her something to eat, which she'd eaten in silence, and I'd had no desire to push her when she'd still been looking so fucking tired. I'd also been more concerned with her wounds than with small talk, so I had prioritized like a good husband, but that was over now. With Shea having been fed, her wounds cleaned and re-bandaged, and soaking in the tub now, it was time to talk.

She opened her eyes to look my way, and though there were so many emotions warring in that gaze of hers, love for me wasn't one of them, and I realized that I was probably going to have to be resigned to the fact that Shea may never come to love me. Nevertheless, as long as she was loyal and faithful to me, then I'd take what I could get.

"And then what?" she asked.

I cocked my head a bit. "What do you mean?"

"What happens after I tell you, Mr. Murphy?"

"Shea?"

"What?"

"I need you to listen to me, lass," I told her. "I need you to listen to me and believe what I'm about to tell you. I need you to believe it like you've never believed anything else in your life before. I need you to believe it like you believe in The Lord." She gave me a small nod to let me know that she heard me. "If you call me Mr. Murphy one more time, I'm going to lose my shit, and it won't be pretty."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning that I will brand the fuck out of you if you don't stop calling me that," I threatened. "It means that I will strap you down, then tattoo my fucking name across the front of your neck if I have to." Her eyes widened. "I'll cover every inch of your skin with my name if you don't knock it the fuck off, lass."

"Lovely," she bit out, her jaw ticking.

Ignoring that, I asked, "What happened?"

It took her a few minutes, but then she finally obeyed me. "When I walked out of the hospital's front doors, Craig was waiting for me, and when I asked where the car was, he said that it was around the back because a predictable routine wasn't safe."

"That's true," I remarked, something that we were all very aware of. Our poker game was about the only thing predictable in our routines, but even then, we changed the times and changed out the guards regularly.

"It…it made sense," she conceded. "When he explained that the same thing would go for shopping and things like that, it seemed like overkill, but not unreasonable."

"What happened next?"

"I started to get a bad feeling because why not inform me of the change before my shift?" she went on. "Why not let me know that my routine would be disrupted when you first assigned him to me? Why not explain how it worked when we first met?" She let out a deep breath as she shook her head a little. "Anyway, before I could ask more questions, someone slammed my body up against the building, knocking the wind from my lungs. Though I didn't know it at the time, but my body spun just as the first bullet grazed my head, sending me to the ground, and then, as soon as I dropped, I felt the second gunshot to my arm."

"What next, baby?" I asked, doing my best to appear calm.

"As I was still trying to process what was happening, I heard Craig telling one of the shooters to hurry up and make a clean shot, and to not mess it up." She let out another tired breath. "The…the first guy instructed Craig to stand next to my body, so that it'll look like he took the shot trying to protect me." Her dark eyes hardened, and there was going to be nothing left of Craig by the time that I was done with him. "Then Craig said that you better appreciate what they were doing since he might bleed out if the other guy fucked it up."

"Shea-"

She put her hand up to shut me up, and knowing that I owed her, I did. "A second guy suggested that they check if I was dead, but Craig told him not to go near me because it might look suspicious if my body was messed with. Craig told him to steal my purse to sell a mugging gone wrong, and that he'd finish the job if I wasn't already dead. Craig said…he said that there was no way that they were going to fuck it up for you."

"Then what?" I bit out, rage making it hard to even speak.

"The second guy ended up shooting Craig twice to sell the story better," she continued. "After the second shot, Craig told them to leave and to remember that they don't know each other. The second guy joked that they didn't know each other until Craig needed them again, and that's when Craig told them that there was only one bitch that needed killing. Luckily or unluckily for me, someone found us before Craig could check my pulse to see if I was really dead or not."

I didn't say anything as the truth ate away at me. Even though Craig had acted on his own, this shit really was my fault. Had I not treated Shea so casually or spoken about her so dismissively, then maybe Craig wouldn't have taken my comments about not wanting a wife so seriously. Shea had been targeted because of me, and that was something that I was going to have to take to my grave when the time came. I had failed her in every fucking way, and my manhood was taking a real motherfucking beating because of it. Yeah, Craig was going to pay in blood, but making him pay for what he'd done to my wife was going to do nothing towards getting her to ever trust me, much less love me.

"Shea, I did not order your hit," I finally said. "I know that you don't believe me, but it's the truth."

She looked away, her eyes falling to the thousands of bubbles covering her body. "It doesn't matter."

"Since I'm in love with you, I disagree," I replied quietly.

"I don't know what you want me to say to that," she said as she still studied the bubbles.

"You're never going to believe me, are you?" I asked, and the tightness in my chest was uncomfortable enough for me to finally know what panic felt like.

Shea lifted her eyes back my way before saying, "That you didn't order the hit? No, I'm not."

"So, then I guess it's pointless to ask if you're ever going to believe that I love you," I added.

"Pretty much," she replied brutally.

She held my gaze as I stood up from the toilet, then walked over to the tub. Staring down at my wife, I said, "Okay, I can accept that. I can accept it because this is my fault. Nevertheless, you are my wife, Shea. You are my wife, and I will expect you to act accordingly. We will never be divorced, and I will never allow you to leave me ever again." Her jaw ticked stubbornly, but she didn't interrupt me. "You might never come to love me, but you will honor me, obey me, be faithful to me, and give me children when the time comes. Do I make myself clear?"

"Do I have a choice?" she bit out.

"No."

Looking back at the bubbles, she said, "Got it."

"I hope that you do, baby," I told her. "Otherwise, you're going to find yourself paying a price that you won't be able to afford."