Chapter Thirteen

Pasha

I was beginning to appreciate coming out today. For a while, when I first stepped out of the Uber, my anxiety was on ten. I was feeling out of place. All I wanted to do was get back in the car and go home. When I saw Callum, my feet gravitated toward him, even though my mind told me to go the other way. Even behind his sunglasses, I couldn't mistake him. I'd stolen many a glance at the handsome, six-foot chocolate man yesterday. I watched his muscles flex as he and Malcolm lifted the heavy furniture. I watched him lift his shirt to wipe the sweat from his brow, exposing his toned abs. I noticed the single dimple in his left cheek and the whiteness of his teeth when he smiled.

Even if I didn't want to be attracted to him, he was as beautiful on the outside as he seemed to be inside. His eyes were kind, and he presented himself as a genuine person. But what did I know? My horrible judgment of men began and ended with Raymond. I never wanted to be the type of woman who held all men to the same standard as the one who broke my heart and tried to break my spirit.

We'd been walking around for about two hours now. The sun was blazing, so we took several breaks to find shade and drink water to stay hydrated. We ventured away from the farmers' market and strolled down the Main Street strip. Currently, we were sitting in the courtyard in front of a popular restaurant beside the large fountain. The cool breeze coming off of the water was very refreshing.

"This makes me want to get in the water," I said, leaning back and closing my eyes.

He chuckled. "I can always dip you in there."

My eyes flew open. "You wouldn't dare."

He laughed. "I wouldn't, but I know what you mean. It's a good beach day."

"God, I haven't been to the beach in so long."

"Me either. Maybe we could go one of these days."

I was quiet. Being in town was one thing, but going out of town with him was a different story. Even if I got to know him better, I didn't want him to think this was going further than our friendship. I wasn't sure if I'd be comfortable with him seeing me in a bathing suit anyway. Hell, I wasn't sure if I'd be comfortable seeing myself in one. I avoided my naked body in the mirror. How could I put it on display for the world to see?

Just as I went to say something, my eyes landed on the last person I wanted to see while trying to have a good day. There was Raymond and a very pregnant Adora walking hand in hand toward the restaurant.

"Can we go?" I asked, standing.

Callum frowned in confusion. "What's wrong?"

"Please? I don't want him to see—"

"Well, well, well. If it isn't my soon-to-be ex-wife."

I closed my eyes, refusing to look at him, at them. It was enough seeing him in court. I didn't want to see him here.

He chuckled. "You actually look like somebody today."

Callum stood and advanced toward him.

"Callum, please..." I begged, only for it to be disregarded.

"Am I gonna have to put my hands on you every time I see you?" he asked, stepping toe-to-toe with Raymond.

"You need to back up."

"And you need to move along. There isn't a reason in the world that you need to stop and talk to her. Are you not standing here with the woman you wanted? Pasha shouldn't bother you like that if you were."

"That fat bitch couldn't bother me if she tried."

Callum had hemmed him up before I knew what was happening and slammed his body against the fountain's seating.

"Let him go!" Adora yelled. "I'm calling the police."

"Go right ahead," Callum said.

He turned to Raymond, who struggled to free himself of his hold. His attempts were useless. Callum leaned into him.

"I can see that my interactions with you will consist of me teaching lessons. The first time, you learned not to put your hands on people. This time, you learned not to be disrespectful. What's it going to be next time? I'm always in the mood to bring you up to speed on shit that you should already know."

He brought his face close to Raymond's and forced him to look at me.

"When you see her, you don't say anything. Don't look in her direction. Don't even breathe hard. If I catch wind that you have been out of pocket with her, things will get very ugly for you the next time I see you. Please don't make me see to it that there is a next time."

He yanked Raymond to his feet and shoved him away. Turning to Adora, he shook his head.

"You should be embarrassed and ashamed. Not only are you walking around proud to be pregnant by another woman's husband, but he can't even defend himself. Both of you are pathetic."

Without another word, he grabbed my hand and pulled me away from them. We walked in silence until we were around the corner from where we started. Then Callum pulled me over to a bench and sat me down.

"Are you okay?" he asked softly.

I nodded. "Thank you for defending me."

"I don't play that name-calling or body-shaming."

I shook my head. "He always went out of his way to make me feel bad about the weight I've gained. I carried and lost his child. I could never be that heartless toward someone I claimed to have loved. He always looked at me like he was just disgusted. It was like he took pride in making me hate myself."

Callum grabbed my hand and squeezed it. "That's on him. You are beautiful, Pasha. I have a feeling that deep down, the inside matches the outside. I can see the visible change in you. Four months ago, you had this look like you were broken. Like your mind and spirit were just done with life. I don't see that in you anymore. Your walk is lighter. Your head isn't down. There was joy and happiness in your eyes yesterday. You deserve that. If I have to put hands on that man every time I see him for him to know he doesn't get to break you again, so be it."

I looked at him curiously. He seemed to be a passionate man, a man who always did the right thing and looked out for the underdog. I just wasn't sure why he was being so nice to me. He didn't know me. I'd only been in his presence three times, and each time, he'd looked at me like he saw something I didn't see in myself.

"What's your deal with me?" I asked.

"My deal?"

"Why are you so nice to me?"

"I'm a nice guy."

"And you just want to be my friend?"

"I can offer you friendship until your friendship is what you no longer want."

I raised an eyebrow. "Meaning?"

"I'm on your time."

"And if I said never speak to me again?"

He chuckled. "Well, that would hurt my feelings, but I'd respect it and leave you alone. I'm not here to take anything from you, Pasha."

For some reason, I believed him when he said that. There was nothing for him to gain from lying to me. He didn't seem to be playing with my emotions or cashing in on my vulnerability. There were some people you meet in life that simply had genuine spirits. Callum seemed to be pure, not without flaw, but a man of pure intentions.

I nodded slowly. "I believe you," I said softly. I nervously rubbed my hands together. "I think I've had enough for today. I want to go home now."

"Can I give you a ride or call one of mine to take you?"

Options? He's thoughtful.

"I'm okay with you taking me."

He nodded and stood, reaching for my hand. I slipped my palm in his and stood to my feet. Hand in hand, we walked back to his truck in complete silence. He helped me inside and buckled my seat belt before closing the door. I sat nervously as he rounded the driver's side and climbed in himself. When he cranked up, the smooth sounds of Anita Baker's "Sweet Love" filled the space between us as he pulled out of the parking space. I smiled softly.

"My mother loved this song," I said aloud.

"Mine did too. I have a whole playlist of her and my father's favorites. I usually listen to it while I'm cleaning. You know, that Saturday morning cleaning vibe."

"I remember those days. My mother had me up early every Saturday. Avyn woke me up with gospel music on Sundays. It was a little weird not hearing it this morning. I already miss her."

"Good thing all you have to do is take the elevator up when you want to see her."

"I'm sure I'll see her all the time outside of work."

"You work at the hotel?"

"Yes. I do housekeeping. I also work part time at a grocery store. I wanted to save enough to afford my apartment, and I still have to pay for my therapy."

"How's that going?"

"Well, I had to sell my wedding ring to cover the cost. I knew I couldn't afford not to go, so I paid a year in advance. What I didn't spend, I'm saving up to buy a car. I don't want to keep hounding Avyn to use hers if I need to go out."

"If you need a ride, you can always call me. If I can't make it, I'll send a driver."

"You've already extended your kindness enough, Callum. I can't ask you to do that."

He chuckled. "Good thing you aren't asking."

I shook my head. "I get the feeling that you are the type of friend that doesn't take no for an answer."

"I can accept a no. Sometimes, I may overstep. I'll apologize if I hurt your feelings, but if it's coming from a place of love, I will do it anyway."

"You and Avyn would get along just fine."

"I already like her." He pulled up to my building and in front of the door. "This is your stop."

"Thank you again... for everything."

"There's no thanks needed." He grabbed my hand and kissed it. "I hope you have a good rest of your day."

"You too."

I climbed out of his truck and headed up to the door. He waited until I was safely inside before pulling off. Aside from the run-in with Raymond, today had been a good day. Callum had been an unexpected addition, but I couldn't say I didn't enjoy my time with him. I didn't have any male friends. I hadn't had one since I was in high school. He wasn't like any man I'd ever met, and I wasn't sure if that scared or intrigued me. Only time will tell.

I'd been back in my apartment for about an hour.

I busied myself with making Sunday dinner. Growing up, I helped my mother cook in the kitchen, and there was always more than enough food. I never knew how to cook for just one person, so I was sure there would be leftovers I could take to work for the next day. I was knee-deep in cutting up potatoes for my potato salad when I heard the locks of my front door disengage. There was no need to ask who it was because Avyn was the only person with a key.

"Are you decent?" she asked, coming through with her eyes covered.

I giggled. "Like that would have stopped you."

"You're right. I was just being courteous." She hung up her keys and bounced over to me, pulling me in for a hug and a kiss on the cheek. "You look happy today. What's buttered your biscuits?"

"I've just had a good day. It was almost perfect."

"Almost?"

I gave her a quick rundown of my morning out, and she listened intently. She smiled as I told her about Callum, but I could see her fists clenching when I mentioned Raymond.

"See, I like Callum more and more. He should have drowned Raymond in that fountain. He's too damn old to be body-shaming anybody. The nigga is pushing forty, and he's acting childish right now. Didn't Callum hem him up the last time?"

I nodded. "He did. And he said if he has to put his hands on him every time to let him know he doesn't get to break me again, then so be it."

Avyn shuddered. "Whew! That's a good man, Savannah," she said, mocking Waiting to Exhale. "I'm claiming him for you, boo. That right there is going to be your man."

"He's just my friend, Avyn."

"Please! That man doesn't want just to be your friend. What did you think he meant by being your friend until you no longer wanted friendship, Pash? He's leaving the door open. As soon as you give him the green light, he will make you his woman."

"I don't know about all that."

"Well, I do. I see it in his eyes. Malcolm vouched for him. He says he's a good guy with good intentions. He's not one of these men who runs game or tries to sleep with every woman he encounters. He's all about his sister, his niece, and his money. He ain't for the streets."

"How does Malcolm even know him?"

She kissed her teeth. "Girl, that man knows a little of everybody. Apparently, Callum provides car services for the policeman's ball and several other city official events from time to time. They've been friends for years."

"It's a small world."

"I see double dates in our future!"

"You are way too excited about this."

She laughed. "So, what if I am? You deserve a good man, Pasha. You put up with that mess for too long. If you can come out of this marriage with a healthy, loving relationship with a good man, I'm all for it."

"So when are you going to get a good man, Avyn? I hear about Malcolm more than any of these other guys you casually date."

She blushed. "I do like him, okay? He's been asking to be official for a while."

"What's stopping you?"

"Full transparency? I'm scared, Pasha. Seeing what you went through... I don't think I'd have the mental capacity to handle that. When I love, I love hard. And if you break my heart, I'm gonna end up in jail. He's a cop. Girl, they would throw the book at me. I'm too pretty to be somebody's prison bitch for the rest of my life."

I couldn't help but laugh at her. Although she was making fun, I knew she was serious. I'd seen her heartbroken before, and I even feared for that man's life. We were in our early twenties, and she was dating this guy who had about four years on us. She was so in love, and when she caught him cheating on her, she beat him pretty badly.

I set my knife down and grabbed her hands. "You deserve a good man too, Avyn. You're a good person with an amazing heart. Don't let fear keep you from being happy."

She smiled. "Hi, Pot, I'm Kettle."

I playfully rolled my eyes as I dropped her hands. "I can't with you. Seriously, though. I've watched you with Malcolm over the last couple of months. I could tell you are into him more than you let on. He seems like a good guy."

"Just like Callum."

"I'd feel weird dating while I'm going through a divorce. I mean, it won't be over for a while."

"If Raymond can parade around town with his tramp, so can you. Just tell me... Are you attracted to him?"

"I mean... He's attractive. Very attractive. And I like his energy. I can't say I'm attracted to him so soon. We'll see how this friendship pans out, and I'll get back to you on that."

I almost regretted that as soon as I said it. The smile on her face was bright and wide. I knew I could expect to be asked for an update after update from her and the girls because she was sure to relay the message.