Chapter 28

28

T he long grass swayed in the breeze, and Josiah's boot brushed the play of their green tips as they bent in waves over the sweeping expanse. Across the creek, a wooded rise with a steep rock-strewn slope opened to the rolling sun-dappled hillside. The land and the valley were the only thing in his life that made sense.

He sat rigidly in his saddle and looked at the group gathered below. Blast it. Why did he feel obligated to join Jeb for his baptism? These religious ceremonies were not his thing. At least he could keep a safe distance.

He moved closer so he could hear what was being said, and found Colby with his horse tied up under a large oak tree. Josiah nudged his mount forward. "Mind if I join you?"

Colby nodded. "Sure."

Josiah had heard the fire-and-brimstone sermons from these types of religious zealots a time or two. Would this message be the same?

He slid from his mount, tied his horse to the nearest tree branch, and leaned against the large oak. This spot on the bank just above the crowd was the perfect place to listen, but not be readily noticed.

"You're making a commitment," the preacher said, "letting the world know that you've accepted Jesus into your life. As I lower you into the water, it will symbolize the washing away of your sin and the beginning of a new life. The power to live free from the stronghold of sin will breathe within you. You won't be a perfect person, but you'll be changed. And your desire to sin will diminish as your love for God increases."

Colby removed his hat and ran a hand through his flattened hair. As the blond curls sprang to life, he looked at Josiah with sorrow in his eyes.

Josiah looked away. He didn't need a bout of conscience from Colby.

Where was the yelling, ranting, and raving he'd expected from the pastor? The man spoke with a strong, calm voice. An angry preacher would be better than these simple words that cut deep into his soul. At least with the hell-fire message, he could distract himself with a good laugh at the preacher sweating as if he were already there.

"Jeb, you'll be first. I'd like you to say a few words about what this means to you." The preacher motioned Katherine's father forward and slapped his back in encouragement. "You'll do just fine."

"Sorry. I'm so nervous." Jeb's laugh sounded forced. "Not much for crowds, just an old farmer working the land most days."

"You can do it, brother," one yelled.

"I'm a man of few words, but I do have something to say. I've sinned, and I am a sinner. Coming face to face with who I was, my weaknesses, the lies from my past I kept hidden, was the hardest, yet most freeing, moment of my life. To realize the good Lord loves a sinner like me, well I plumb near can't take it."

The crowd clapped, and amens were sprinkled throughout.

"Then to lose everything in a fire and humble myself enough to ask God for provision and have it handed to me"—he looked up the bank to Josiah—"I know I'm blessed beyond measure."

A look of sheer peace covered Jeb's smiling face as he turned toward the preacher. "Reverend Booth, I'm ready." He walked into the water with his head held high and his face to the heavens.

The preacher and another gentleman joined him, one on each side. As Jeb placed his arms across his chest and was lowered beneath the water, a jolt of awareness slipped through Josiah.

When Jeb was back on his feet, arms lifted toward the heavens in praise and a look of radiance on his face, a tremor slid through Josiah's body. Something much greater than he was present, and Josiah could feel the power. Sweat trickled down his back, and his shirt stuck to his skin. The crowd started into a song. Perspiration dried cold on his neck, and he brushed his clammy palms on his trousers. He'd never felt so unclean.

One by one, men and women spoke a few heartfelt words and were dunked below the water's surface, just as Jeb had been. Each time a person emerged with radiance on their face, an unspoken challenge called out to his lonely soul.

"For any of you out there"—the preacher scanned the crowd, then lifted his eyes up the bank to where the two of them sat in the shade—"who has a desire to know more about Jesus as your personal friend and Savior, come and we'll talk." His eyes, like live coals, burrowed into Josiah's soul.

Josiah was battling the itch in his own feet when Colby jumped up and slipped down the bank. At the bottom, he sauntered forward. The crowd split to make room, and the preacher moved forward with an outstretched hand.

"What? No fire-and-brimstone speech?" Colby chuckled, but the sound came out a tad nervous.

Everyone laughed, including the preacher, who shook his hand. "I'm Marcus Booth, but I answer to most anything."

Colby removed his hat, raked a hand through his hair, and shifted on his feet. "Colby Braddock."

"Colby Braddock," the preacher said. "Good strong name. And as for using scare tactics, I think that's been done a time or two, don't you?" A sparkle of amusement filled his kind eyes as he looked up to Josiah, as if to invite him too. He spoke in loud, clear tones. "Most people know that side of the story. I prefer to share how much God loves you. He sent His Son, Jesus, to die for you, and He awaits your decision."

"What decision exactly?" Colby asked.

The preacher smiled. Crinkles formed, cupping both his mouth and eyes. "God is a gentleman. He gives everyone the ability to choose. I guess just like we humans want real love, so does God. It's not something He demands we give to Him. Rather, it's something we choose to give to Him."

Josiah's heart pounded. Was that not what he desired from Katherine—spontaneous love, not something out of obligation.

"What do I need to do?" Colby asked.

The preacher circled Colby's shoulders with his creek-dampened arm. "All it takes is a simple prayer of faith acknowledging your sin and accepting the gift of Jesus's sacrifice for you. That begins the wonderful life with Christ." He smiled, first at Colby and then up the bank at Josiah. "Then the Spirit of God comes and resides in you. Changes will begin to happen. Don't worry though. God is gentle and won't overwhelm you with a thousand dos and don'ts.

"Just like that oak you were leaning against up there"—he pointed toward Josiah—"was once a young sapling bending to the slightest breeze. The roots took hold and grew, and now, that old tree is powerful and strong with roots that spread far and wide beneath the earth. Your relationship with the Lord is similar, and will take time to grow and mature. Just don't forget to nourish your soul as you would your body."

"I'm all for nourishment." Now Colby's voice came stronger as he patted his stomach. A few amused chuckles drifted through the crowd.

"You nourish your body by eating, and you nourish your soul by reading the Bible and talking to your Father daily. Also, surround yourself with others who can teach and encourage you." He waved a hand toward the crowd. "These people are your neighbors and will embrace you like family."

They nodded, hanging on the preacher's every word. Josiah was not so easily misled. This God was doing him no favors these days, and he felt no need for allegiance.

The preacher looked at Colby. "My brother, I have the distinct feeling God has been calling you for some time now. Am I right?"

Colby nodded. "I think so." He glanced up the bank at Josiah, then turned back to the preacher and spoke in a lower tone. "I know my sinfulness."

The reverend clapped him on the back. "Well then Colby, let's pray and baptize you right here, right now. There's no better moment."

Josiah couldn't make out more than a murmur as Colby spoke a quiet prayer, but he could easily see the repentance on his friend's face. Then he was dunked in the water, and when he came up, his face wore a broad grin. Jeb stepped forward and enveloped him in a big hug.

As everyone else gathered around them, Josiah had never felt more alone. He untied his horse, mounted, and lit out across the field. Yet no matter how far he ran, he couldn't escape the longing in his soul.

Katie emerged from her dark bedroom, holding her lit candlestick as she padded down the hall. The soft glow cast wavering shadows on the wall. At well past midnight, she was safe to get a few bites to eat without running into anyone. Her stomach was giving her trouble, and the one thing that curbed the nausea were a few dry corn biscuits.

She entered the kitchen and started at the sight of Colby sitting at the table, his head bowed, his lips moving. He must have heard her gasp, for his head lifted. Her gown tangled around her ankles as she turned away.

"Katie, wait. I need to talk to you." The plea in his voice drew her.

She breathed out a heavy sigh. She did not have the strength to handle this complication. Her pa's words rang true. She wasn't innocent in her friendship with Colby. Far too many times she had wished she were married to him instead of Josiah. She kept her back to him, but by the scrape of the chair on the floor, he must have stood.

She tightened her resolve and didn't turn to him. "I don't think it's a good idea to be alone with you."

"I have to talk to you before I leave."

Leave? A pain pressed into her. Surely he didn't mean for good. For a few days? Katie smoothed a trembling hand over her long hair, cringing at the tangled mess.

"I asked Josiah to join me, but he said he trusted you."

She whirled around. "That's a laugh. And what do you mean you're leaving?"

He moved close enough to look in her eyes, but didn't touch her. "I have to."

"Where are you going?" Her voice wavered. "For how long?"

"Not sure where the good Lord will take me."

She pressed her fingers to her temples and rubbed at the throbbing headache his nonsensical words were giving her. Where was he going and why was he talking about the Lord as if he believed God would actually lead him?

"I must ask for your forgiveness, Katie, as I've already done with Josiah. I'm so sorry for encouraging a relationship with you that only belongs to Josiah."

She pushed down the guilt his comments stirred. "You know better than anyone that Josiah wants nothing to do with me. Why the sudden bout of conscience? It's not as if we did anything immoral." Yet, even as the words left her mouth, the lie in them clutched her throat.

He shook his head. "We did, though. The time we spent together, including our midnight walks in the garden, were not leaving room for reconciliation. I take complete responsibility. I knew you were struggling. I also knew that Josiah loved you, no matter how hard he tried to hide it."

Katie drew a sharp breath in.

"I relished your company and encouraged every moment you gave me. Instead of pushing you toward Josiah, I sucked up the attention like the sand in a desert rainstorm. I let myself love you, knowing full-well you belonged to my best friend. That was wrong…so very, very wrong."

"But—"

"Please, let me finish. You are, and always will be, a temptation to me. The Bible is clear about temptation, and God tells His followers to flee it. So, I have to leave."

Anger burned inside her. Maybe irrational anger, but she couldn't seem to stop it. "The good Lord, Colby? The Bible? Since when have you read the Bible?"

"I became a Christian the other day, and it's amazing how the Bible makes sense to me now." A smile warmed his face. "I'm at peace like never before."

A shuddered breath slipped through her lips. Colby was her last vestige of comfort, and now this God would take even him.

"Why can't you stay? Why can't we remain friends? Josiah needs you on this ranch." She stepped forward, but he stepped back.

"I can't speak for you, but I know in my mind I was way beyond friendship. We can never go back. I'm so sorry. Please, forgive me." Warmth and sincerity poured from his eyes.

Her heart lurched in response. But he was asking for forgiveness. If their relationship had been so wrong, then she needed forgiveness also. Yet she couldn't face that yet.

She turned away, holding her back straight. "I guess this is good-bye, then. Turns out, you're just like all the rest." Tears broke through her defenses, and she swiped at them fiercely.

"It's not like that." He placed a hand on her shoulder.

She shrugged it off. "You can have your God and this ranch."

"Please, try to understand."

She turned to meet his gaze. "I understand more than you know, and I've had a lot of time to think. You stay, and I'll go. I don't want to come in the middle of your partnership, of your dreams. If you go, Josiah will have too much to?—"

"No." Colby's tone was sharp. "Josiah understands how he messed things up with you. Give him a chance. Besides, everything was fine until I arrived on the scene. So, no. I go. You stay. It's God's will."

Katie gazed up. Instead of the haunted look she had become so accustomed to, a peace and strength radiated on Colby's face. If only she could find such peace. She moved closer and placed a trembling hand on his cheek. "Be happy. Get as far away from me as you can. I don't bring happiness to anyone."

A rush of red filled his face at her touch, and he folded his hand over hers and lowered her hand away.

"I'll pray you and Josiah find love again."

"Love?" She couldn't keep the bitterness from her tone. "He won't even look at me."

"I'll also pray that someday you'll understand, and look back on my good-bye as demonstrating a far greater love than if I had stayed." He squeezed her hand, then released her. After crushing his hat on his head, he turned and walked out the door without looking back.