Chapter 17

Tidun picked me up again Sunday night for a late dinner. My shift operating the Ferris wheel ended at the usual time, but there were a few guests asking for one of my sketches. I felt bad leaving them hanging, especially since I wasn't around to draw yesterday either.

"Did something good happen?" Tidun asked when I got in his car. My chest was basically puffed up with pride after all the compliments I'd received.

Word had gotten around about my art and some of the guests today had visited the circus specifically to get a portrait done by me. I had to remember to thank Rhett for pushing me to share my art in the first place.

I told Tidun what had happened tonight. He'd been very understanding when I texted to push back the date time.

"That's awesome! You're very skilled, so it's no wonder they wanted a portrait from you. In fact, I'm sure tons of people would want to learn from you as well."

His praise had me blushing. It wasn't the first time someone said that to me, but I always got self-conscious at compliments, especially when he was telling me I was good enough to teach. I hadn't thought about that before, but it sounded interesting.

"How come you haven't shared more of your art with me? Besides the portrait you did of me, I mean," he asked, his body turned to me as much as he could while in the car.

"You'd actually want to see more?" I asked. Unless they were interested in art, I didn't get many people asking to see my work, besides my parents and Aisha. But they were practically obligated to as my family.

"Of course. Show me the last thing you drew."

Now that I thought about it, the last drawing I actually did in my free time was of Tidun. It was one of dozens that lay on a pile in my closet. There was no way in hell I was showing him those, though. Having him think I was a creeper was the last thing I wanted.

It had been a while since I last posted on Ether as well, with the last post being from when we were still at our previous location.

I never shared the sketches I did of the whale I saw the first day we'd arrived in this city. Like with Tidun's portraits, something always felt off.

I was never a perfectionist—there was so much beauty in the imperfect—but when drawing the whale and Tidun, it had always felt like something was missing.

"Honestly, I haven't had time to draw anything new in a while," I replied, edging the topic.

"Why don't we have a night in then? We can pick up some food and head to your place for an art session. I might be a lost cause at bowling, but maybe art is where my skills shine?" he joked, and I cracked a smile.

"You'd want to do that? Won't you get bored?"

He shrugged an arm. "I won't know until I try, right?" My smile stretched my face now. I'd worried that I had been a bit too forceful when I suggested we try new things till he found something he was passionate about, but now it seemed he was on board with the idea as well.

"Besides, I'm not completely uninterested in art. There's this artist I follow online that I really like. Though, it's been a while since they last posted," he commented.

I tried to press the nasty jealousy monster down because I should be happy that a fellow artist was being complimented. I firmly believed that artists elevated each other. But the possessive side of me wished that I was the artist he was talking about.

That was impossible, though, since I only posted my art on Ether and Into the Ether was only accessible by other paranormal or humans in the know. I didn't really understand how the app knew who to invite on the social media platform, but the option to download the app had suddenly appeared on my phone one day.

"If you're down for it, that sounds great. What should we get for dinner? Pizza?"

"Only if it has pineapple on it," Tidun replied with a grin.

I laughed. "Like there was any other option."

"Wow, I love how you decorated," Tidun said when we entered my RV. He placed the pizza on the small kitchenette counter and looked around.

"Thanks. My roommate said the same thing when he first moved in—well, ex-roommate. He was pretty quick to fall in love and move in with his boyfriend," I said, mostly rambling because I was nervous about showing my home to a boy I liked for the first time ever.

Tidun looked around the place I'd spent the last few years making my home. I'd moved out of my parents' RV when I'd turned sixteen. I loved my parents to death, but I think we were all glad when I got my own place. Their RV was a lot larger than mine, but it was still kinda cramped for three people.

And living without my own private room as a horny teenager? That wasn't fun. I didn't have to worry about that now that I had a place of my own.

His eyes passed over the colorful pillows and throw blankets I'd used to make a nest on the floor. It was my favorite spot to curl up and draw. I thought it was funny that I did my best work wrapped around a splash of vibrancy when my art was mostly black and white.

He glanced up at the sketches taped to my wall. Most of the members of the circus allowed me to draw them in their natural form, and now, years later, the portraits basically covered every free inch of space.

I wasn't too worried about Tidun seeing them. Sure, there were drawings of shifters and elves and fairies on my walls, but I figured the most normal reaction would be to assume that I'd taken creative liberty.

What I hadn't expected were the next words that came out of his mouth.

"So you do know about the paranormal."

"Wha—I don't know what you mean," I stuttered out.

Had I somehow given it away? Were my drawings too obvious and bringing him here had been a huge mistake?

This was like a repeat of what happened with Rhett last year when I'd accidentally spilled the beans to him, and I still felt bad about that. Thankfully, Rhett was trustworthy, but I hated the fact that I could have potentially put everyone I loved in danger.

And now I'd done it again.

"Shit, Conall, breathe," Tidun said as he loosely wrapped his arms around me. His touch settled me a bit, but the rush of blood was still whistling in my ear.

"I didn't say that to freak you out." He rubbed calming strokes against my shoulders before continuing, "I just wanted to make sure you knew because I wanted you to know that…I'm a shifter."

The way my mouth hung open so fast, I was surprised my jaw didn't hit the floor.

"Pardon?" I squeaked out. My ears must not be working today.

Tidun chuckled, deep and low, the sound so deliciously sexy that I might have popped a hard-on if I hadn't been panicking.

"But Aisha said you smelled human the day we met," I said blankly. I was relieved that I hadn't just spilled the circus's biggest secret to a human, but I was still in shock at this news.

His laugh quickly died out and was replaced with a guilty expression. "About that..." he stared, rubbing the back of his head. His hair looked completely silver in the dim fairy lights I had strung up across the entire RV.

"Look, it was all before I met you. If I could go back in time and we were somehow still able to meet, I would have done it all differently. I wouldn't have gone to the stupid club," he said. His eyes got big, looking like a kicked puppy.

I just stared back, not really understanding what he was talking about. There was too much information to process all at once, and I was still reeling over the shock that Tidun was part of the paranormal world.

It wasn't until he spoke up again that I finally understood. "You're mad, aren't you? Did I just ruin everything?" He sounded more panicked than I was earlier.

"No," I finally said.

"You're not mad?" he asked hesitantly.

"I'm not going to lie and say I'm not jealous, because I am. I'm so fucking jealous of all the lucky people who got to share a bed with you…but I can't be mad at you for living your life before we've even met. That would be unfair to both of us. All I care about is that I'm the only one now."

I stared him down, letting him know that I was serious. I knew people who had open relationships and were very happy in them, but even if I'd never had a relationship before, I knew that wasn't for me. I was too damn possessive to be able to share my man.

"Oh thank the goddess," Tidun said, sighing with what sounded like relief. He tightened his arms around me. "I promise there's no one else. Fuck, I don't think there can ever be anyone else."

His confession struck hard, because no matter how much I tried telling myself to just enjoy being with him and take things day by day, it was getting harder to do that the more time I spent with him.

I could already feel myself falling in love with this man, and I didn't think I wanted to stop even if I could. Which probably wasn't smart of me.

Whether I liked it or not, the circus was moving on next week.

Our time was limited, but I hoped this relationship wasn't.