8. Kaino

8

Kaino

The jostling flow of students through the corridor thins, thank god. Perhaps two more minutes, and there will be enough room to walk down the hall without feeling like a pinball in one of those old arcade machines. Given my choice, I’d‘ve stayed in the room after my client’s class was over, at least until the worst of the crowds had passed, but there’s another class in that room immediately after, so it’s not an option.

I’m about to push out of the small alcove I’ve taken refuge in when my phone buzzes. Xander’s name appears on the screen, and my heart races. I tap open the message.

Xander: Just leaving class. Coffee?

We’ve had coffee two weeks in a row. This would be the third, and I’m not sure how I feel about saying yes. I want to, because, regardless of my desire to reconnect with Bjorn, we haven’t yet. And the more I get to know Xander, the more I like him as a person. And if I’m honest with myself, the more attractive I find him. But I still can’t figure out why he keeps asking to go for coffee. At first, I thought he was hitting on me. But during our first meetup, we discussed English literature, mostly focused on the Romantic period. He never asked me out or made any kind of move. Which I was happy about at the time.

When he contacted me again last week, and I agreed to meet for coffee, I was expecting some clarification on what he wants this thing between us to be. Not that I’m ready to move from friends to dating, but does he consider us friends? Are we still acquaintances? But there was no clarification.

Instead, Xander surprised me with a very thorough critique of a graduate student chamber music performance he’d attended the night before, and I thought maybe that was an indication that he just wanted to be friends. But he was very attentive and bought our coffees. While neither of those is particularly romantic, the vibe was date-like. Staring at my phone, I wonder if I should reply. I’m still not sure I want to make this meetup a weekly habit, and I hate this kind of relationship ambiguity. I raise my phone, about to decline, when another text comes through.

Xander: Bjorn’s near campus and wants to join us

Xander : He says you texted about this

Xander: You available?

My heart thumps in my chest as I reread the text. It’s been three weeks since I visited Bjorn in the hospital, and in that time, I’ve only had the one text exchange with him. Neither of us has reached out to the other since, and I assumed it meant he changed his mind about joining us for coffee and he’s moved on. I figured I should do the same. Not that I’ve been successful at that. And now he says he wants to join us for coffee? Or did he want to join Xander for coffee, and I’m part of the deal because Xander already invited me?

Me: You don’t need a third wheel

Me: Maybe next week

His response is almost immediate, as if he were expecting me to say that.

Xander: He specifically wants to see us both

Xander: I told him we were having coffee and he asked if he could join us

Xander: Then he sent this

Xander: sad puppy gif

Xander: good boy gif

Xander: Cheesy smile gif

I snort and shake my head.

Me: He’s such an ass

Xander: That’s what I said

Xander: Please come

Rolling my eyes, I shove off the wall and walk toward his lecture hall.

Me: Heading your way now

I close the app and slip the phone into my pocket while ignoring the butterflies in my stomach.

Fifteen minutes later, Xander and I walk through the doors of the coffee shop near the front of campus. It’s crawling with students, and I do my best to make myself as small as possible, avoiding random contact.

“There he is.” The excitement in Xander’s voice is unmistakable, and I ignore the stab of jealousy. I’m smaller and more nimble. If I really wanted to, I could get to Bjorn first. But that’s not going to happen. Even the idea makes my skin tight. Instead, I grunt acknowledgement and trail behind Xander, letting him carve a path for us.

When we finally make it through the crowd, Bjorn’s excitement is palpable. Xander reaches him first, and Bjorn hauls him into a bear hug so tight I swear I can hear his bones creak. I ignore the jealousy stabbing through me. I can’t even tell which of them I’m more jealous of. And isn’t that annoying. I sit and wait, but when the hug goes on longer than is typical for friends, I finally clear my throat. “Should I get our coffee order while you two wrap up your PDA?” I modulate my tone to amused exasperation. With obvious reluctance, Xander lets go of Bjorn. I have very definite, and completely annoying feelings about that, but don’t want to look at them too closely.

“Hey Kaino. Good to see you, too.” I drop into a chair, and there’s a flash of disappointment in Bjorn’s expression, but he shifts gears easily like he always did, holding out a fist for me to bump.

Which I do. “Sure. It’s good to see you.”

Bjorn claps his hands together. “Okay, I’m buying. No arguments. You know I’ll win anyway. What are we having?” Before either Xander or I can open our mouths, he points to me. “Espresso and madeleines. Yes?” It’s all I can do to keep my mouth from dropping open. Even years later he still remembers. I nod, not trusting my voice. Then the asshole winks at me, and heat sweeps through my entire body.

He turns to Xander. “A dalgona coffee?”

Xander beams, and I see a few students do double takes and elbow each other. “You remember.”

“Of course I do. Okay, I’ll be right back.” He weaves through the cafe, heading for the counter like he hasn’t just rocked our worlds.

Clearing my throat, I flick my gaze toward the students who have their phones out and are taking pictures or filming Xander. His smile disappears, and he glares at them. They laugh, quickly turning away, and he drops into the chair next to me with a sigh. “I should have insisted we meet at my office.”

“You’ll get no argument from me, but what was that about?”

Xander tucks his fingers under his glasses and rubs his eyes. “If I had to hazard a guess, they’re stunned by my happy expression. I’m not particularly known for being pleasant, let alone for smiling. Unlike someone we know.” Xander gestures toward the counter. I glance over at Bjorn, who is charming the pants off of the barista behind the counter. It’s not even intentional. He just exudes golden retriever energy, and everyone falls all over themselves to make him happy. Next to me, Xander snorts. “He’s a menace.”

I can’t disagree. “He’d be dangerous if he knew he was doing it. But it’s just who he is.”

“Thoroughly disgusting.”

Tilting my head, I consider. “You know, if we could bottle that, we’d make a fortune.”

“And probably be arrested for witchcraft.”

“True.” I turn away from Bjorn, who is far too distracting, and focus on Xander. “How did class go today?”

With a significant sigh, Xander slumps in his chair. “Have I mentioned how much I detest teaching freshman intro classes? Thankfully, I only have the one, but dear gods, how have these individuals managed to graduate from high school without learning how to write a coherent paragraph, let alone an entire paper?”

I raise an eyebrow. “And get off my lawn?”

He blinks at me. “Sorry, what?”

“I figured that was next. You sound like a crotchety old man.”

Xander bristles, turning his cold stare on me. “I beg your pardon. I’m not old.”

I relax into my chair. “Who says I beg your pardon besides old people? And technically, I didn’t say you are old, I said you sound old. But since you brought it up, how old are you?”

He side-eyes me. “How old are you?”

“Thirty-four.”

A bit of color drains from Xander’s face. “Christ, you’re a baby.”

“Really. That’s your response? You must be really old, then.” I doubt it. He doesn’t look that much older than me. But after a response like that he deserves a little shit.

“He’s forty-one, if I’m doing the math properly. I’m thirty-eight.” Bjorn sets three mugs down on the low table between our seats and drops into an empty chair. “How old’s the baby?” He looks at me.

With a snort, I reach for my espresso. “I’m not even going to be insulted that you remember how old Xander is but not how old I am. And it’s thirty-four, by the way. Hardly a baby.”

Bjorn nods. “Hardly. Four-year gap.” He gestures between us. “And three.” He gestures between himself and Xander. “And seven between the two of you. That’s not huge.”

Xander reaches for his dalgona. “It’s not insignificant, either.”

“But it is irrelevant.”

Xander rolls his eyes. “Says every young person, ever.”

“Do you want me to call you gramps?” Why is he so hung up on how old I am? I turn to Bjorn, who is watching us with amusement. “As if forty-one is old.”

Bjorn leans in, grinning. “Speaking of old, what did the grownup cow say to the baby cow?” He doesn’t even wait for us to reply. “It’s pasture bedtime.”

He looks at us expectantly, and I groan. “That’s awful.”

“It is not!” But he’s laughing, like he knows it really is. “So, Kaino, what’s new?”

One hundred percent of his attention is on me, and if Bjorn hadn’t just spoken to him, I’d swear he forgot Xander’s here. Oh, the headiness of being Bjorn’s sole focus. I’m pulled into his gaze, and I don’t fight it. “Nothing, really. It sounds ridiculous, given that it’s been four years, but my routine has been pretty steady.”

Bjorn shakes his head. “Nothing? No new hobbies?”

I glance at Xander, then back to Bjorn. “Nothing I care to discuss at the moment.” Xander makes an indignant squawk, and I turn to him, eyebrow raised. “You have a problem with that?”

“I thought we were becoming friends. But I suppose we don’t really know each other. Still, rude.” He waves me off and crosses his arms over his chest.

Xander, without a doubt, is a brat. A very needy one, if I’m not mistaken. And likely to continue this line of behavior unless he’s dealt with. I turn to Bjorn. “Please excuse me for a moment.” I physically turn my entire body to give Xander my full attention. “Xander, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” Which is exactly the answer I expected. “It’s not polite to mention secrets, look right at me, and then say you’ll discuss it later. That’s juvenile behavior.”

I don’t mention that his behavior at the moment is juvenile. Mostly because his point is well taken, and I’m feeling a bit guilty and chastised. I tilt my head to the side, considering. “Is it my attention you want? Or Bjorn’s?” I can feel Bjorn’s gaze on me, but I focus on Xander.

Xander bristles, mouth opening and closing a few times before he finds his words. “I don’t appreciate being treated as if I’m a child.”

“Then don’t act like one.” My tone is firm but unheated, and I don’t look away, wondering if this is typical behavior for him. “If you can be patient for ten minutes, we can discuss expectations, boundaries, limits, and what you hope to get out of this dynamic.” Once again, he opens and closes his mouth several times, but nothing comes out. I don’t really expect him to follow through on my suggestion, and I only made it to shock him out of his little tantrum.

Bjorn’s laughter booms through the cafe, and several heads turn our way, but he doesn’t seem to care. “Oh, my god, I’ve never seen Xander speechless before.” Bjorn wipes at his eyes. I suppress the smile tugging at my lips. If I’m reading Xander properly, laughing will only make him act out more.

I let Bjorn settle, then answer his question as if we hadn’t been interrupted. “Now that I’m staying around the western part of the state, I can get into more permanent hobbies. I’m thinking about volunteering at a local animal rescue center, and hiking is still a favorite.” I can almost feel Xander’s prickliness fading.

“You like animals?” His tone is slightly defensive, but it’s a peace offering of sorts, so I accept.

“I do. Dogs and cats, mostly. Though I’ve been known to play with the odd ferret or two. I’m not much into reptiles or arachnids. Basically, if it has four legs and is usually furry and friendly, I’m game.”

Xander smirks. “What about hairless cats?”

I raise one eyebrow. “If they’re affectionate, then they are fine in my book.”

“I have a dog.” We both turn to look at Bjorn, who isscrolling through his phone. “He’s a Norwegian Elkhound. His name’s Pita.”

Xander frowns. “As in the bread?”

Knowing Bjorn, I don’t think that’s it. “Or because he’s a pain in the ass?”

When Bjorn bursts into booming laughter, I know I got it right. “He is a pain in the ass.” Bjorn turns his phone and shows us a picture of a gorgeous Norwegian Elkhound, who is actually smiling for the camera. “He knows he’s handsome, too.”

Xander and I both agree on his good looks. “Xander, do you have a pet?”

His entire face lights up, and he reaches for his own phone, flipping to a picture, then showing us a huge orange tabby with bright green eyes, sitting peacefully in a sunbeam. “Mr. Bingley.”

It’s my turn to burst into laughter. “Because he’s a sweet but somewhat clueless boy?”

“Exactly.” Xander’s grin softens his entire face, making him look significantly less grumpy.

I look at the picture again before handing the phone back. “He’s very handsome.” Xander practically preens as if I’ve complimented his looks, and I find that fascinating.

Bjorn squints at the picture and then nods. “He looks like a good boy. Like he’d hang out and help play video games or help you read.”

I blink. “How does a cat help with either of those things?”

“What? Really? C’mon. He could be your gaming bud. You both hang out on the couch, eating Cheez-its or strawberry Pop-Tarts or whatever, vanquishing the bad guys. Bingley would be there for moral support and let you know if any enemies were trying to creep up on you from behind. Or if you were reading, he’d totally lay across your chest and keep you warm while reading the book with you. Or napping.”

Xander chuckles. “Bingley does love a good nap.”

“Hey.” Bjorn’s looking at us with barely contained excitement. “We all love animals, and Kaino, you said you were thinking of volunteering at the local animal shelter. Well, what if the three of us could do that one day soon? What do you think?”

Xander’s eyes widen and he leans toward Bjorn. “Can we play with the cats?”

“Probably. I can find a shelter with a volunteer program and verify that when I set things up.” He turns to me. “What do you think?”

I consider the offer. As I mentioned, I have been considering volunteering for a while. I just haven’t gotten around to it. And depending on what we’re tasked with, it could be a fun way to spend time with Bjorn and Xander. “We’d have to make sure it was a time when I’m off.”

“I can do that, too. I’ll call and get details and run them by both of you before we make any plans.”

“Kaino, do you have any pets?” Xander watches me expectantly.

I shake my head. “Not yet. I’m still getting settled and making new routines.”

“Like your class at the university.”

I nod. “Yes. And I’m reconnecting with some of my gallery contacts. I have a few shows I’ll be interpreting later next month.”

“Ooh!” He leans in, eyes wide. “What kind of shows?”

“One’s by a local nature photographer. She takes mostly landscapes, but there are some great wildlife shots, too. The other one is by a metal sculptor. He takes scrap metal and makes all sorts of unique sculptures. Everything from small pieces you can hold in your hand to twenty foot tall installation pieces. He has this one that’s two hands holding a tiny bird. It’s breathtaking.” I glance at Bjorn, who’s listening intently, and decide now’s a good time to throw myself out onto the proverbial limb. “You guys should come.” I had originally intended to invite Bjorn, but inviting Xander seems right. I’d like him there. And I think he’d probably enjoy it as much as, if not more than, Bjorn.

Full of excitement, Xander grabs my wrist. “I’d love to.”

I freeze, staring at his hand, but don’t immediately jerk away from the touch. It’s not comfortable by any means, but it doesn’t feel invasive, and I don’t have that skin-too-tight sensation. Almost immediately, though, he lets go, and I breathe easier. I do wonder at my reaction, though. Or lack thereof. Somewhere along the way, my brain put Xander in the ‘safe’ category. I suppose he is. He’s a new friend, but I enjoy spending time with him. He’s incredibly smart and enjoys several of the same things I do. And yes, in spite of his sometimes bratty behavior, I like hanging out with him. Bjorn watches me intently. Without a doubt, he saw Xander touching me. But rather than judgment and hurt, which he could easily be feeling, he’s smiling, like he’s happy for me.

I’m not sure what makes me do it, but I place my hand on Bjorn’s forearm, squeezing lightly. “Will you come, too?”

His eyes widen almost comically, then he looks at my hand and back at me, his gaze soft. Everything inside me melts. Keeping his touch light, he covers my hand with his. If I wanted to, I could easily pull my hand free, but I don’t, and his smile grows even wider. “I’d love to. Maybe we could all get dinner before.”

I squeeze his forearm again and slowly withdraw my hand. “Unfortunately, I can’t. I’ll have a lot of prep to do with both shows, interpreting for the artists on any last-minute details. But you two should. And then we can all get a coffee or something after.” Again, I’m not sure why I’m including Xander in my plan. It’s not just that it would be rude to exclude him since he’s sitting right here. Being with both of them is fun, and I enjoy the banter. Maybe I’m enjoying having friends. Maybe, just maybe, it’s more than that.

Xander’s eyes sparkle as he leans toward Bjorn. “That sounds like an excellent idea. And I know just the place.”