10. Chapter 10

Chapter ten

Silas

T his means nothing.

Fenella is bored and curious and this means nothing.

Except, as many times as I repeat myself, I can't bring myself to ignore the flare of hope as she follows us up the path into the woods.

She looks adorable wearing my coat. And the hat…

Dead leaves cover the trail and make it impossible to move quietly. I set up solar lights every few metres, but Fenella still follows close behind, reaching out with a hand against my back when we hit a dark patch.

"Should I be nervous?" she asks with an odd tone in her voice that may be actual nerves. "I have no idea where we're going, even if I could see in the dark."

"Afraid I'm about to kidnap you?"

"Serial killer did cross my mind."

"Trust me. I thought you said I was a nice guy."

"Nice guys can still lose people in the dark. "

I huff a laugh and Wyatt twists his neck to shoot a surprised look at me. What ? I mouth, but there's no way for him to see me in the dark.

We step out of the trees a moment later.

I found this spot years ago, a clearing in the woods where the rocks hang over the shoreline, the waves crashing a few feet below. One huge rock is forming a table where I can set up my telescope.

"Wow," Fenella breathes. My eyes have adjusted to the dimness so I can take in her wide eyes. "It's like I'm at the edge of the world."

"Technically, you're at the edge of Laandia," Wyatt says. "This might be the most eastern point of the country. Careful, don't go too close to the edge." We both reach for her as she takes a step.

"I keep meaning to build some sort of barrier there," I add, letting my hand slide off the coat sleeve.

"The ocean is right there," she says with delight. "I could jump in."

"There's rocks. So, maybe not."

Fenella pulls out her phone and takes a bunch of pictures, posing with Wyatt as they chatter away while I set up my Celestron Omni double refractor. It's the third telescope I've owned and my favourite.

"I can tag you in these," she says to him. "Your followers will skyrocket if I'm in your feed. "

"He's sixteen," I point out. "He doesn't need any more followers or even reasons to be on social media."

"Fair. I'll just post the sky because it is a- ma -zing. Unless you want in on this?" She points her phone at me, but I shake my head.

I'm not sure what to say to Fenella. Me, who can talk to anyone and pride myself on making anyone feel comfortable, have suddenly become tongue-tied when I'm around Fenella Carrington.

She's just a woman. I know lots of women and I can talk to them all. Princess Lyra is a personal friend. My cousin Edie is going to be queen of Laandia someday. I once served coffee to Taylor Swift's best friend.

But none of them are Fenella.

"This is just here for anyone to see." She tilts her head up, turning in a circle and seemingly enraptured by the vista above.

She should be—it's one of the best spots in the world to look at the stars.

"Do you bring all your girls here?" Fenella ends up beside me, standing very close.

I drop the bag with the extra lens. I'd rather she be close to me than fall over the edge, but she's very distracting.

And I have a feeling she likes to be that way.

"Ah, I… No. Not really."

"I don't know why not. It's the perfect spot." She stares out into the night, the waves a soothing backdrop. My heart gives a traitorous stutter at how peaceful she looks. Every time I see Fenella, she is moving. Constantly active, constant changing expressions. But now she's still, and her smile…

Stop looking at her smile. She gives the same smile to everyone.

Imagine living each day like it's an adventure. Imagine having the money to do so.

"Can you see whales from here?" she asks, peering over to look into the dark water.

I forget about the telescope and grab her wrist, letting my fingers slide down to cup her hand and leading her a safe step closer to the edge. The rock does drop off unexpectedly but I've been here enough times to know the feel of it.

"Whales, icebergs," Wyatt tells her. "Grandpa is convinced he once saw all the way to Scotland on a clear day."

"He didn't see Scotland," I chide.

"He might have. It's the closest to us, just over there." He stretches out his arm and points over the gray sea.

"Do you know all the stars?" Fenella points up, her hand still in mine. I'm not sure if she realizes it, but I'm very aware—of how small and soft her hand. How cold her fingers are.

Her fingers move, but instead of pulling her hand away, she entwines her fingers with mine.

I'm standing at the edge of the world, holding hands with Fenella Carrington.

"Not all of them," Wyatt concedes. "But a lot. That's Cassiopeia." He stretches his arm up and out. "Perseus. And that's Lynx there. You can see the Lyra constellation, but you have to stay here for a while and it gets pretty cold."

"Lyra has a star named after her? I've never heard of that." She turns to me. "Is this what you do here? Teach him how to name the stars?"

"Silas was supposed to be an astronaut," Wyatt says before I can answer. "He gave up the idea when I came along, because my mom is an idiot and took off and left me with my grandparents. Which is stupid, because I'm not his kid. He's an awesome uncle, though."

"I bet he is." Fenella smiles but I see the curiosity in her eyes. "He can still go up into space," she adds. "Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk—lots of spaceships go up and check things out."

"Like I can afford that." Fenella and Wyatt look at each other. "No," I say. "Please don't think you can buy me a seat on a spaceship."

"I probably could," she whispers. "But, whatever."

"It's not being in space, it's just… seeing… this." I spread an arm out. "Stars."

"It's his thing," Wyatt adds.

"It's a good thing," Fenella agrees. "I thought coffee was just your thing, so this is a plus. Show me something."

I reluctantly let go of her hand to check the sights in the telescope and make adjustments until Neptune is visible, hanging low and clear in the scope. "Take a look," I offer.

Fenella eagerly bends to peer into the eyepiece. "Oh, my god," she cries, her voice echoing over the water and loud enough to startle something in the trees. "That's a planet."

"I told you that you can see Neptune tonight," Wyatt says smugly, like he pulled it from the sky to present it to her.

She straightens to look at me. "Can you see it all the time?"

"No, it depends on the rotation of the Earth and the other planets. Usually, Venus is visible." I move the telescope and Fenella eagerly bends to look. "That's Venus."

"That's Venus," she echoes. "I'm looking at a planet. I'm looking at a planet. It's beautiful."

Wyatt nudges my arm and gives me a knowing expression. I shake my head. Hot , he mouths.

I almost laugh because whatever Fenella looks like wearing my ten-year-old coat that is warm and so unfashionable—and probably smells a bit funky from living in my trunk—is not hot.

Definitely cute, but not hot.

I thought you liked boys , I mouth back.

He points to me and then Fenella, like I have no idea what he's getting at. I know exactly what he's getting at, and I want no part of it.

That's what I keep telling myself.

Fenella straightens up. "What else is up here? Here, you can look," she offers to Wyatt .

"I see Venus all the time. Neptune is pretty cool." I'm proud of the way he moves the telescope into the right position and makes the necessary adjustments before taking a look.

"You spend a lot of time together?" Fenella asks.

I glance over, see the way she's looking at me with those purple eyes, and nod.

"Your mom not around?" Fenella asks as casually as if she's asking about the weather.

"No." Even after all this time, Wyatt's tone is still bitter but much better than when he was younger and someone mentioned his mother. The tween years were particularly difficult for him. "Definitely not around."

"That can't feel good."

"No, it really doesn't."

"You know what else doesn't feel good?" Fenella asks as she leans down to take another look. "When your mom is around but clearly doesn't want to be. When she makes everything and everyone feel more important than you. But you wouldn't know about that because you've got this really cool uncle and a great set of grandparents who consider you the most important thing in their world."

There's a long pause. "Yeah," Wyatt says finally. "I do."

"You do," she agrees. "The mother thing has to suck, though. But focus on the good things that are going on with your life instead of dwelling on the bad stuff."

"Is that what you do? "

"Oh, I wasn't talking about myself." And then she winks at Wyatt, who breaks into a fangirl—fanguy—smile.

"You're a lot cooler than I thought you'd be," he concedes.

"Oh, I am the coolest," she corrects. "Want to do a selfie?" And she poses with him, both with big grins. "Tag me if you want to increase your followers. Oops, no don't, or Uncle Silas will be upset with me. How did you find this spot?" she asks me.

"I've lived in Battle Harbour my entire life. There's not a lot of spots that I don't know about."

"What's your favourite spot?" she demands. "The best place to look at stars or bring girls or—"

Wyatt snorts. "He doesn't bring girls anywhere."

"Like I would tell you."

"It's a small town," Wyatt says in a dry voice. "I'd know if you were dating."

"I date." I glance down at Fenella, who watches me with an expectant expression. "I date."

A corner of her mouth lifts like she's trying not to smile. "Where would be your favourite place to take a date then?"

Right here, but I don't say that out loud. I've only brought one woman here and it didn't mean much to her. That kind of spoiled it for anyone else, but now that Fenella seems to be enjoying herself…

"There are a couple of good restaurants in town," I tell her.

"Really? You know all the spots and you'd take a girl to a restaurant? "

"Where's that place you used to take Mia?" Wyatt is still looking into the telescope, so he doesn't see my jolt from Mia's name.

I hope Fenella doesn't notice.

Four years, and I still react when I hear her name. I know that's because I haven't let myself move on, or get over her, or picture a future that doesn't have her in it.

I feel the weight of Fenella's gaze on me. I shrug.

"What about you?" she asks Wyatt. "Who are you dating?"

"I asked Brody to the Halloween dance."

"I don't know who that is, but sounds great."

"Is that all that interests you?" Wyatt asks. "Who is dating is who?"

"Around here? I have to be interested in something."

"Why are you here, then?"

"Because the guy I was dating turned out to be an idiot. Let me have another turn."

They take turns looking and pointing and I tell them what's out there.

When she's not looking through the lens, Fenella moves back to my side.

I lose track of how long we stay there because Fenella keeps asking questions like she's truly interested. But eventually, I realize that she's hovering by me, attaching herself to my side really, when she's not looking through the scope, because she's shivering.

"We should go," I finally say reluctantly. When I'm one with the stars—corny, sure, but that's how I feel—I never want it to end, but it's different with Fenella here.

I'm having fun with her. I'm enjoying her company.

Not that Fenella doesn't have things that would be enjoyable—her company, that's all I'm thinking about—but I never thought it would be me who enjoyed it. Her. Spending time with her.

She's Fenella Carrington, after all.

So I drink in all of her smiles, and excited exclamations. She seems fascinated by the proximity of the ocean, demanding to know what animals we've seen and where we saw them.

I think she really wants to jump off the table rock and I explain a few times what she could expect if she did—icy cold water, strong undertow, rocks hidden under the surface, and probable death. Wyatt tells her about the spot near town where the kids swim, jumping off the rocks into a sandy-bottomed bay, and she promises to come back in the summer so he can take her.

I'm not going to hold my breath for that to happen. I may be enjoying her company, but I'm not going to kid myself that there will be a repeat of it.

I do like how she seems excited about so many things. Maybe it's an act, or maybe Fenella actually lives a sheltered life—as a billionaire.

Giving everyone one last look at Neptune, I pack up the telescope, setting it gently in the case. Wyatt leads us back through the trees, the dim solar-powered lights illuminating parts of the path.

"Do you come here often?" Fenella asks, her voice low because we're walking through the woods at night and it always feels like you should be quiet. Despite this, her question comes across as somewhat seductive. Flirtatious.

She realizes it at the same time and gives a laugh. "That came out wrong."

"No, it's good… I do come here often. As much as I can."

"You really must like stars."

"I do. Almost as much as I like coffee," I tease.

"I didn't… I don't have anything like that," she confesses. "Nothing that would bring me out to the woods in the middle of the night."

"It's only ten-thirty," Wyatt informs us.

"Still." Fenella lifts her hands and the sleeves of my jacket shift and slip down her arms. "Nothing."

"You must have interests."

"Yes, but I don't have a passion."

"What do you do when you're not hiding out in the castle?"

"You've seen my Instagram. That's what I do." She sounds… disappointed almost. "A little bit of everything and not much of anything." She pauses for a long moment and just when I think she's finished, she starts again, her words rushed together. "I wanted to work at my father's company. I think I'd be good at it, really make a difference, but with everything that happened—the video with Tiger going viral and the last video, and the last—my father said the board doesn't want me. Not now, anyway. They think I have too high a profile and I need to stay out of sight."

"Laandia to the rescue, then, huh?" I keep it light so I don't let on how hearing that makes me feel—how the sadness and disappointment in Fenella's voice cuts straight to my heart.

I never imagined I would ever feel sympathy for her.

We step out of the woods, into the clearing where the cars are parked. The moon hangs high in the sky and the strong light from the lighthouse lets me see Fenella—and I realize how adorable she looks wearing my coat. Box-like, but lumpy, and the moonlight seems to send sparkles cascading through her long, black hair. "You couldn't have found a better place to hide out," I add.

"Gunnar didn't even hesitate," Fenella says. "Jumped in his plane and came and got me. And King Magnus made sure no press will be let in, so whatever I do here, I get to do in private."

"And what are you thinking of doing here?" Now my voice sounds slightly seductive. Flirtatious. "I mean…"

Fenella laughs.

"Or who?" Wyatt cackles, sounding more like a sixty-year-old woman than a sixteen-year-old man-boy.

"Recent bad break-up, remember? I hadn't given that much thought," Fenella says with a twist of her lips. "But now that I have my car, I have options. And… maybe people, now, for those options."

People? Like… me, people ?

Fenella glances up at the sky, but I look at her. At the length of her neck. At those cheekbones that sell things, like handbags.

I think other things sold the handbags, but since the rest of her is completely covered, I'll say it's the cheekbones.

"Look! A shooting star," Fenella cries.

"A satellite," I tell her without taking my eyes off her.

She does a little jump. "No—look." She grabs my arm and hoists it up to force me to look where she's pointing. I pull my gaze away from her pink cheeks, and yes, slightly blue-tinged lips, just in time to see the tail end of a falling star. "I've never seen one before."

Her first falling star. Normally, that would be a gift for me, but all I can think about is that Fenella is cold.

And what I could do to warm her up.

"Make a wish," Wyatt calls.

I know what I'm wishing for.

Fenella glances over at me, catching me in her violet gaze, and I wonder again how a person can have purple eyes.

But then I stop wondering because Fenella doesn't drop her gaze. She looks like she wants—

She looks at my mouth and it's as if she skims a finger along my lips.

I tell myself it's my imagination.

Only it's not.