Elliot

"Do you ever think about what you'll do when you're out of here?" Reno asked as we checked the saddlebags. There had been another ‘grand escape' by the sheep, and for whatever reason, Reno and I were assigned as designated retrievers.

The question came out of nowhere and took me off guard. Normally, it was my job to ask questions without giving warnings or providing context. Clearly, I was beginning to rub off on him in more than just the literal sense.

"I mean, sometimes," I said with a shrug, adjusting the strap on my horse and giving her a pat on the side of her thick neck when she snorted. "They do the job workshops once you get into Tier Two. So I was banking on that to help me along."

"They have what now?"

"And people say I don't pay attention."

"You're the one who says you actually pay too much attention."

"Well, I guess it's nice that you listen to me once in a while," I snorted, looking over as he wrestled with the straps on his horse. It seemed that grumpy and quiet wasn't the necessary combination for being good with animals. That was apparently just a Max thing. "They have all sorts of workshops. Not just, like, legal help or whatever, but stuff for people to find work and housing."

"I guess that makes sense," Reno said, frowning again. "Do these look right?"

I heard a snort from behind me and turned to find Max standing near the stables, arms crossed and smirking. "They gave you Cheyenne? That's mean."

"Why?" Reno asked, looking over the horse. "She seems fine. I just can't get these damn straps to work."

"Because she's a sweet girl but a total brat sometimes," Max said, grabbing the straps.

"Mmm, I know someone like that," I said with a grin.

Max rolled his eyes. "Just because we know each other's little secrets doesn't mean we're going to get buddy-buddy-like."

"How's Riley?" I asked as he fussed with the horse. "And don't act like you aren't talking to him. I don't know what kind of arrangement is going on, but you're definitely talking to him."

"And what makes you think that?" Max asked neutrally and then gave the horse"s flank a rough couple of pats. I watched as Cheyenne sucked in a sudden breath, and he tightened the straps.

"Because otherwise, you'd be moping and depressed," I pointed out.

"I don't mope," he said, checking the straps before notching them.

Reno snorted. "You certainly would be without your little ray of sunshine. I've seen you smile twice in two days. You didn't do that before, and you'd quit if you lost Riley."

Max glared at him. "You know, I was capable of experiencing happiness before Riley."

I grinned. "And you're allowed to be your version of a grinning idiot because you're in love."

"Was she really pushing her gut out to keep me from tightening the straps?" Reno asked as Max stepped back.

"She was, does it all the time. Surprised they didn't tell you," Max said with a snort, petting Cheyenne's head. The horse didn't move into the touch but didn't pull away. Figured it had to be her version of pouting. "Like I said, she's a sweet girl for the most part, but she has her bratty moments."

"Don't repeat yourself," Reno said without looking at me, but there wasn't anyone else he could be talking to with such exasperation.

"I wouldn't dream of it," I said with a chuckle. "Are we not being seen off today?"

"I came over to make sure everything was alright," Max said with a shrug. "It seems Leon doesn't feel like you two need to have your hands held to pick a few sheep up."

"I mean, yeah, I guess," Reno said with an irritated shrug that Max ignored completely. I didn't, though, because I recognized when he felt something other than anger. I didn't know why, but the idea that we didn't need to be looked over as much made Reno uncomfortable. I didn't want to make any assumptions, but sometimes I wondered if he was all that comfortable with not…well, not being in the program. Maybe it was because of whatever he'd done to get put behind bars in the first place, or maybe it was that pesky low sense of self-worth he carried and refused to deal with.

"What's the point of some of this stuff, though?" I asked, peering over some things they'd given us to load up. "Like…this is camping supplies and shit. Extra water…snacks?—"

"Rations," Max corrected.

"Whatever. My question is still the same."

"It took us almost a full day to realize the back line of the pens was damaged as bad as it was," Max said, his nose wrinkling. "I'm real glad I'm not the one in charge of checking on that sort of thing. Mona was seething."

"I'm…not sure I want to see what Mona seething looks like," I admitted, and even Reno grunted his affirmation. It had been a couple of weeks since I'd caught him and Mona hanging out on the porch of the Big House together, having what looked like one hell of a heart-to-heart. He hadn't spoken of it, and it wasn't my business to start with, especially considering nothing seemed to come of it.

Whatever they'd talked about didn't seem to have changed much regarding his opinion and behavior toward her, at least not openly. There was something different between them, but it was hard to put a name to it. Whatever it was, the two of them were normal, but there was something…respectful between them.

"Oh, it's perfectly fine to be around her when she's like that," Max explained, then grinned the most evil grin I'd ever seen. "Not so fine if you're the reason she's pissed off, though."

"A good thing I'm the sort of person that inspires happiness and comfort in others," I said, ignoring Reno when he gave the ugliest of snorts. For someone who liked to give me shit about not being funny, his jokes weren't any better.

"Yeah, a good thing," Max said dryly, smirking with Reno.

"Assholes," I sniffed, turning away to pay attention to my horse instead. "You're not a shithead like these two, are you Buttercup?"

"His name is Coyote," Max told me, and I didn't have to look at him to know he was rolling his eyes.

"Looks like a Buttercup to me."

"That's because you didn't see him thrash the group of coyotes that came into the barn when he was only a colt."

"Seriously? And they gave him to Elliot?" Reno asked in a dubious voice, but it was a sign that I'd been around him long enough to know he was genuinely worried. While still kind of insulting, at least it came from a decent place.

Max snorted. "Coyote is a good boy. Gentle as can be with people and other farm animals. He was defending the other foals in the barn at the time. As far as he's concerned, no one's going to fuck with what he considers his."

Considering I wasn't precisely sure what a horse would or wouldn't consider ‘his,' I wasn't exactly sure if I should be thrilled by his explanation. All the horses I'd been exposed to at the ranch had been calm and friendly, but I knew quite a few animals had to be separated because they weren't. Then again, Max was the one in charge of the care and training of those animals, so really, I just had to trust that if he said it was okay, then it was, even if I wasn't all that sold on the reasoning.

"Anyway, it makes sense that you might need to stay out there. You don't want to go wandering around at night," Max continued, stepping back.

I glanced at Reno, not caring that my surprise was probably blatant. "Seriously? We're?—"

"More than capable of handling yourselves, I hope," Max finished, watching me.

"I'm sure we can manage not to die horribly," Reno added, his brow furrowed.

"Good," Max grunted and then frowned. "And speaking of. We haven't had any reports lately, nothing significant, but don't let your guard down out there. Mr. Isaiah works pretty hard with the other ranches in the area to ensure this county is clear of drug runners, but keep an eye out all the same."

"Yeah, we know," I said with a sigh. I knew I didn't have the world's greatest memory, but I thought it might be a little hard to forget the repeated warning. Everyone knew to keep an eye out for the drug runners. No one wanted to deal with cartel members when they were unarmed and didn't know what they were doing. "This is not news to us."

"Look, I know you have issues assessing a problem properly…" Max began seriously, only to be cut off by Reno clearing his throat.

"He's bad at deciding if he should pants Dom in the middle of a serious conversation about work safety, but he's more than smart enough to realize that mean assholes with a gun aren't to be fucked with," Reno told him.

That made me grin. Dom was officially plotting revenge for that little joke. Telling him he should blame his genetics for being called ‘Big Hog' wasn't really helping much. "I have earned that bit of revenge. But it'll be worth it."

"And I'm not saving him when the day of retribution comes," Reno said with a shake of his head as if he hadn't been laughing later when we were alone.

"Worth it," I repeated.

"Whatever the case," Max said with a touch of the old irritation we were all used to hearing from him. "Just watch your asses out there. And don't get bit by anything."

"Yes, because I'm a toddler with a death wish," I snarked.

"That's redundant," Reno said.

I frowned at him. "I…what do you know about kids?"

He snorted. "You serious? I was one of the only people in my neighborhood who didn't have kids by nineteen."

"And?"

"And it wasn't like they were making a shit ton of money with all the stupid shit they got up to. So I ended up watching them…a lot."

Max cocked his head. "I'd say I'm worried anyone would leave you in charge of the safety of children?—"

"But that would be a dickish thing to say about someone you don't know all that well," I finished for him.

"That it would," he said with a roll of his eyes. "Now quit screwing around. I'm sure they'd prefer you get back before sundown."

"He says like he didn't come over here and interfere," I said, mounting Coyote and scratching his neck when he shook his head. "I got you Butterscotch. You and me are gonna be real good friends."

Max frowned at me. "I thought it was Buttercup."

"Nah, definitely Butterscotch. For sure."

"I don't…understand you."

Reno snorted as he got atop his horse. "And trust me, you never will. Don't even try. You'll only hurt yourself."

"Listen to the man, he has gazed into that abyss of madness and has walked away a changed man," I said solemnly.

"I don't want to hear about your abyss," Max said, walking away and leaving me to gape after him.

"What?" Reno asked.

"I'm pretty sure he just called my asshole an abyss."

"Yeah, pretty sure he did."

"And I'm not sure if I should be shocked that Max made a joke or offended that he referred to my asshole as an abyss!"

"I'm sure you'll find a way to get over it," Reno said with a roll of his eyes as he got the horse moving.

"You're right because I should be mad at you!"

"What did I do?"

"You let him compare my asshole to an abyss!"

"Please, keep shouting about your asshole. Jesus."

"And you're not even defending me now!"

"What, am I supposed to start yelling about your asshole now?"

"You know," I said with a huff, "this conversation is weird and insulting."

"That's how most of our conversations go," he said with a roll of his eyes.

Well, that was true, with me being responsible for the weird and him generally covering the insulting. Not that it was as insulting as it used to be, but that wasn't saying a whole lot. It would be damn easy to do better than the way we had started, but that didn't mean I couldn't be thankful.

As we left through the back gates, I marveled a little at just how much things had changed between us. There was a calmness in Reno that, once upon a time, I would have said outright, would've been physically impossible for him. Nowadays, he didn't go around scowling and snapping at every little thing. Sure, he was still pretty grumpy compared to me, but he no longer acted like he was constantly ready to fight the whole world.

That was even more true when it was just the two of us. Even now, as the ranch faded into the background, I could see him relaxing. I was pretty sure no matter how much better Reno got, he would never be a people person, especially in large groups. Getting him alone was the best way to see the parts of him that were generally locked away when he felt there were too many ‘strangers' around.

But whether it was in our cabin or out here where there was no one but the two of us, more of his personality began to shine through. His harder edges softened, and he didn't always feel the need to be on guard. I liked to believe a big chunk of that was because of me because he liked being around me. Which would have been an impossibility once, but now? Now I was damn sure the jerk was a little crazy about me.

"For the record," he said, jerking me out of my thoughts, "even though I know you've moved past it, I don't think your ass is an abyss."

That jerked a laugh out of me. "You're right, I was already moving onto something else, but thanks, it's nice to know you haven't been faking it when you lose your mind whenever you fuck me."

"I don't lose my mind," he said.

"What would you call it then?"

"I'd call it…appreciating the moment," he said with a slow smile.

"Appreciating this ass you mean," I smirked. "While sounding like an angry bull mixed with a rutting bear in the process."

"I really hate when you decide to start describing things. It always comes out sounding fucking awful."

"I think I have a skill with words."

"Yeah, the skill to make them cringey and horrible."

"Hey, a skill's a skill. You gotta work with what you're given."

It was another sign of how far he'd come that this provoked an entire ‘argument' about whether or not I had been given the skill or had just worked hard at honing the skill…as well as whether it was a skill at all, or just me being a ‘gremlin.' What would have once been one-sided from me and would have earned eye rolls and the occasional grunt out of him was now a full-blown debate. A debate that had him rolling his eyes and grunting, of course, and occasionally insulting me, but that was just part of being with Reno.

Maybe it wasn't the best idea to consider myself as being ‘with' him, but I didn't bother to argue with the feeling anymore. There were far too many things in my life, like being focused on important things, for instance, the age-old struggle for me even now I was medicated.

Liking Reno was dangerous in many ways, but it was far from the worst ‘bad' decision I had ever made. Not that liking someone was ever really something you chose, but I was definitely letting it happen without a fight. It could probably lead to loving him, and shit, maybe it already had, but that was the risk you took when you were constantly around someone you liked.

"Alright," he said after a couple of hours of riding. "You've been quiet for like…fifteen minutes. What the fuck is going on in that head of yours?"

I laughed, a little startled at the accurate accusation. "What makes you think I'm thinking about anything? Weren't you the one who said I don't have any thoughts going on in here?"

"Yeah, well, I was a fucking idiot. The problem with you is that you're thinking too much. And it usually means trouble for everyone around you," he said, casting me a sidelong glance. "And especially you."

"True," I said, debating whether it was worth telling him the truth. As much progress as the two of us had made in recent months, he was…well, he was still Reno. He and softer emotions didn't get along all that well. Sure, he'd softened up a great deal, but trying to be affectionate with him when he wasn't either scared shitless by his nightmares or right after he got off was a dicey proposition.

"Damn," he grunted. "You've gone quiet on me. Just what kind of heinous shit were you thinking?"

"Nothing bad," I insisted and mentally shrugged, knowing it shouldn't be bad to tell him. Well, except for the fact that I was opening myself up to disappointment and the sting of rejection if he decided to avoid or dismiss what I said. "I was just…I don't know. This is…this is nice."

"Nice?" he asked in confusion, his eyes sweeping around as if there was anything out there besides hard-packed ground and the occasional cactus. Well, we were quickly approaching my officially dubbed ‘mini mountain range' where the sheep were prone to going, but that was just a few miles of rocks to break up the monotony of sunburned ground. "Strolling around the desert on horseback, looking for sheep? With the possibility of needing to stay overnight and hoping we don't get hurt in the process?"

"You're such a Gloomy Gus," I said with a laugh. "And well, yeah, none of that sounds all that great, I'll give you that. Not exactly my ideal way to spend the day, but…I'm doing it with you, so that makes it nice."

It was rare to catch him off guard, but I saw it flash over his face and even linger for a moment. I had to take that as another sign that maybe things were a lot more improved between us than I normally would. It wasn't like Reno to let anyone see him being caught by surprise, not without lashing out in irritation and anger immediately afterward.

His expression softened as he shook his head. "You have a very weird idea of what is or isn't enjoyable. And that goes for the company you enjoy having around."

"Yeah, maybe," I admitted with a shrug while feeling the flutter in my chest. To the inexperienced eye, it might look like he was shutting down what I said without hesitation. But I'd seen his reaction, and there was still the ghost of a smile on his face, which told me all I needed to know. He wouldn't engage in my fluffiness but privately enjoyed it.

That understanding left me comfortable despite the slight jostling of the horse and the way the saddle dug into my ass. After another couple of hours, carefully taking our time to patrol around the mini mountains, there was still no sign of the animals. It was strange, considering the last few times we'd gone out, we'd found them quickly.

"Mmm," I hummed, glancing toward the sun as it began to dip behind the wall of jutting rocks. "I can't believe we haven't heard or seen any of them yet. They've never gone too far before."

"Well, it could be anything. They're not exactly what you'd call smart," Reno grunted, but from the frown on his face, I could see he was concerned too. "Something could have scared them into being quiet and hiding…and, well, they have been out longer than usual."

"Aww, don't say they're dead," I groaned, not enjoying the idea of coming across their dead bodies.

"Leon mentioned it was a couple of dozen that got out. So unless there were…a lot of coyotes, I doubt they're all dead. They're smart enough to seek shelter when it's hot or cold out, and they're all well fed and taken care of, so it's not like they'll keel over right away," he said, then grimaced. "But I'm starting to see why they gave us camp supplies."

"I guess they figured we'd be out here for a while," I said with a sigh.

"Yeah. We should probably consider finding somewhere to bed down for the night soon."

"Probably," I agreed. "I just hate the idea of leaving them to roam around or hide, all scared and shit during the night. Poor things."

"Stupid things more like."

"Well, yeah, but still…poor things."

He cast me an amused look. "You and your big, soft heart."

"You know, I'd point out that you have a bigger heart than you like to let on, but I don't feel like getting pushed off my horse," I told him with a grin.

"I wouldn't push you off the horse."

"Uh-huh. Tell me why because we both know it's not sweet."

"Because I'm not carting your broken-legged ass back to the damn ranch. You'd bitch the entire time."

"That's what I thought."

I guess you could say we knew each other too well at times, but it made me laugh anyway. And even though I knew the answer, I had to ask. "So, can we search a little longer? I know we wouldn't be able to head back today even if we found them, but?—"

"Hmm, I guess," he said, surprising me.

However, within half an hour, I knew searching further would be pointless. There was only so much light left in the day, and we needed as much as possible to set up camp. Reno only needed to give me a meaningful look before I sighed heavily, nodding to say I understood and agreed.

"Problem with setting up camp is, I don't know the first thing about it," he admitted as we began to look for a good spot.

"Hey, I might," I said with a sudden grin.

"Seriously? How?"

"I did some Boy Scout stuff when I was younger."

"Uh…how much?"

"Um…six months."

"Of course."

"Hey! I learned some things! I know how to start a fire. Well, I know how, but I don't know if I can. And I also have a good idea of where to set up a camp. I was in it long enough to go on a couple of camping trips."

"Not…exactly the best endorsement, but fuck it, more than I know, that's for sure."

I could have pointed out that he didn't exactly sound enthused by the idea but swallowed the impulse back. As far as Reno went, that was about as enthusiastic support as anyone would get. Honestly, it was progress for both of us that he even showed that support and that I didn't immediately take offense. It was sometimes hard to see how well he had learned to read me, but from my end, it was easy to tell he was letting go of control and letting me prove whether or not I knew my stuff.

Thankfully, fate or whatever was in charge decided to take mercy on me. I found the perfect spot under a stable overhang of rock where we could set up our tents on the ground rather than the rocks. It would also give us plenty of cover when the sun rose in the morning, so we'd at least have a chance to wake up to the light rather than the suffocating heat.

The tents were…well, I hadn't really set up tents when I was a kid, so it took both of us. It took almost twenty minutes to set up the one pup tent correctly, and we were already running out of daylight fast.

"Err, we could share?" I offered, not enjoying the idea of fighting with another tent.

"We're not exactly small," he said, eyeing the tent warily. "And that's a really small tent."

I chuckled, reaching over to grip his waist and squeeze it. "And we've managed to fit onto tiny ass twin beds before. It's a good thing I'm so fond of cuddling."

His eyes darted to me, lingering for a moment before slipping away, but not without leaving a slight smile on his face. "You are pretty persistent."

"Yeah, and you suffer in silence so well," I said, knowing he enjoyed it just as much as I did. He also knew that I knew, and I knew he knew. It was just the sort of complicated, slightly dramatic cycle that should have had him bitching, but he just rolled with it instead. I might wish for more overt displays of affection from him, but on the other hand, I knew he treasured that I was willing to read between the lines for his comfort.

"I didn't think to look through the food," I admitted, reluctantly letting go of him. I had no doubt we would find time later to use the small space afforded us by the tent, considering I had already thought to slip in the…necessities when I realized we were being sent out into the plains again. "What do we even have?"

"Rations from what I saw, which isn't exactly thrilling," he said with a snort, walking over to where we'd tied up the horses to pull the last bags off and rummage through them. "Huh, you been sucking some extra dick or something?"

"Hey! The only dick I've had in my mouth lately is yours…and the only one I want there," I said with a scowl and then realized what he'd said. "Why, do we have some goodies in there?"

He pulled out two metal tins from each of our bags, raising a brow. "This."

"What are those?"

"I've seen some of the employees have them, like Max. They're supposedly battery-operated to keep food warm for hours, so it's still safe."

"Seriously?" I asked, taking one. "Doesn't feel all that warm."

"Wouldn't be very good if you just burned the shit out of your hand when you touched them," he said. "Apparently, they can last for, like, eight hours."

"Well, that's fucking cool," I said, finding the latches on the side of the lid and opening it. The rich smell of meat and seasoning flooded my nostrils, making me groan in anticipation. "Oh my God. It's Rip's chicken n' dumplings! Fuck yes!"

Reno frowned as I dug out the camping cutlery set. "I'm…disturbed."

"Are you kidding me? This stuff is delicious, and you know it," I told him, immediately beginning to stir it.

"Yeah. It's just weird that you make the same noises over someone's food as you do when I'm putting my dick in you."

"Well, I'm a simple man."

"I could have told you that."

"Who enjoys his simple pleasures. Good food? I'm excited. Good dick? I'm excited. Easy."

Reno chuckled, sitting on a nearby rock and unlocking his dish. "I'm not sure how I feel about my dick being compared to food."

"Well, this food can make me happy," I said as I scooped a heap out with the spoon attachment to shove into my mouth. "But your dick makes me happy and can make me come. So it has the advantage, I'd say."

"Great, at least I have that going for me."

"Oh fuck! That's really hot!"

"I told you it was still probably going to be hot."

"Oh God, my tongue!"

But of course, it didn't matter how badly I'd hurt myself, Reno just watched me with that same look he'd had before when I did something a little…questionable. It was exasperation and amusement, all bundled into one, which was much better than the annoyance and irritation he used to look at me with for just opening my mouth.

I had to down some water to ease the sting left behind by the food. "Why does something that gives me such joy have to hurt me so bad?"

"Again, I'm feeling oddly compared to food."

"Har har…wait, actually?—"

He sighed, shaking his head and finally scooping food into his mouth. Reno wasn't nearly as intense about good food but even I could see the twitch of his brow when it hit his tastebuds. And then, when his eyes darted down to the food in a frown that told me he was wondering how something out of a tin could taste so good.

"I can't believe you've never had this before," I said with a shake of my head. "Every time he gets around to making it, I always fill up."

"I know. I watched you eat almost five bowls of it one time."

"That should tell you everything you need to know about how good it is!"

"Or it just tells me that you're a fat ass."

"You like my fat ass."

"If you're horny, you can just say it. You don't have to bring up sex constantly to try to make your point."

"I wouldn't say I'm horny. I'm just…in a good mood. Which means I'm pretty much down for a good time."

"You're usually in a good mood."

"Yeah, so think about how often I'm down for a good time."

He snorted, shaking his head. "You're ridiculous."

"Sometimes," I admitted with a shrug.

I made another attempt to eat the chicken and dumpling stew, ensuring I wouldn't scald my mouth this time. We sat there, watching the sun sink lower, setting the sky ablaze. I knew Reno liked to tease me that I was easily impressed by anything, but it was beautiful. The horizon was burning with a deep orange color that turned golden the higher it went. The clouds captured the light, but instead of glowing warm, they were a deep violet color while the sky around turned almost pink.

"Pretty," I said with a smile, stirring the stew for another bite.

"It is," he said. "But it's going to get dark soon, which means it'll get chilly, so?—"

"Oh shit!" I barked, standing up to look around frantically. "I totally forgot we needed to collect firewood or kindling or…shit, there's no trees here."

Reno gave me a doubtful look. "Do you think I would have brought up the fire right before it gets dark if I didn't think we had it covered?"

I opened my mouth, looked at the packs…the packs I hadn't investigated too much, and sighed. "They seriously didn't pack firewood."

"And a starter log," he said with a smirk. "And a lighter. So we don't have to worry about seeing if your memory is good or not."

I let out a sigh. "You could have mentioned that sooner. I about had a heart attack."

"Sorry," he said, even though he was grinning, leaving me to wonder if he wasn't sorry at all or if he was and still thought it was funny. "I'm sure we can get something going here in a minute."

We managed to finish the food as the bright colors of the sunset began to darken quickly, leaving behind only the deep twilight hues of darkening blue and deep purple. The stars were already starting to twinkle into view, covering the inky black sky not covered by clouds. Luckily, they had packed a couple of flashlights, and Reno found everything we needed for a fire while I made the small pit we would use.

"Hope these weren't waterlogged during those storms," I said as I set up the last rocks in a circle.

"Huh?" he asked, shadows cast over his face, deepening the furrow in his brow.

"Oh. I remember hearing that you shouldn't take rocks that are like…near rivers or in them because if they get hot from the fire, they can explode like grenades."

"I…uh…E?"

I looked up, surprised. "What?"

He smiled, shaking his head. "I think that's just rocks that are literally sitting in water. Not random rocks from the desert that only saw a few weeks of rain…two months ago."

"Well…yeah," I agreed a little sheepishly. "I guess you have a point."

"Now, is there anything special I should know about doing this?" he asked, crouching at the edge of the circle I'd made.

"You gotta set it up so the starter log will catch the other stuff and eventually the bigger side. Teepee style."

"What style?"

I grinned, dropping onto my butt in the dirt next to him and grabbing everything. "You know, teepee. Like what they always told us Native Americans used?"

"Why do you always sound like you don't believe things half the time?"

"Always…half the time…which is it?" I asked with a grin as I began setting everything up. I vaguely remembered the setup wasn't just important because it let the fire spread upward but because it allowed air to flow between the spaces in the logs to feed the flames.

"You just…I don't know. Sometimes you don't sound like you believe the shit you remember being taught."

"You sound like some of my teachers."

"What do you mean?"

I shrugged with one shoulder, considering I was using the other to lean over and adjust the fire. "I used to get a lot of shit in school. I mean, for the stuff you'd expect, like not being able to sit still, talking too much, getting into trouble over my ‘good ideas,' stuff like that."

"Yeah, not struggling to picture that," he said with a chuckle.

I handed him the lighter. "Light the starter block, ya fucking comedian."

"Fine," he said with a roll of his eyes, leaning over to do it. "So why else did you get in trouble?"

"Because I was always asking them questions. Drove my teachers nuts."

"Aren't you supposed to want to understand shit? Most of my teachers would have probably shit their pants if I ever asked a question in class instead of glaring at the walls."

Much like he wasn't surprised by my antics as a kid, it wasn't difficult for me to picture a teenage Reno sullenly glaring at random objects. "I don't know, there were some good teachers. But most of them just got pissy if I had questions. Mrs. Duna, my freshman year, gave me detention because she kept insisting we were totally on the right side of things when it came to the war with Mexico over Texas and shit. I pointed out that we did some fucked up shit, and they had every right to be pissed about land, but she wasn't having it."

"God, that's…bitchy."

"Yeah, pissed me off. I mean, shit, I was actually paying attention and reading shit, that should have thrilled her. But nope, just gave me detention. So I kept going over everything in the textbook just in case she said some stupid shit to correct her on."

"Okay, that's either brilliant or petty as fuck."

"I'll take both as an acceptable answer. I got transferred out of her class halfway through the year because of it. The next teacher was some boring dude who just had us read the stuff then do assignments, barely lectured, so I got bored again."

"The Texas education system is thriving."

"Hey, there were some great ones, some good ones, and ones that…well, they were average, I guess," I said as the flames grew and the logs started catching. "Most of the teachers I had were average or better. There were just some shitheads."

Reno leaned back and watched as the fire steadily grew, lighting the area around us and warming it. "I don't remember most of my teachers. They're all just…blurs as far as I was concerned. By the time I got to high school, I had a reputation anyway. So whenever a teacher got me, they just hoped nothing happened. Except Mrs. Mutz."

"Mutz? Really? Now there's a name."

"She was a grade-A bitch, let me tell you. That was my last year in school before I dropped out."

"Was she…part of the reason?"

"Eh, she didn't help. It just…it didn't matter what I did. She was always out to get me. She was always…poking at me. Making me sit next to people who'd tried to start shit with me, calling on me, and then getting pissed when I didn't know the answer. I'd get detention for the stupidest shit, like not having a pencil, but she'd say I was being disruptive. She'd write me up every chance she got, and I stopped even half-ass doing shit in class when she'd always mark everything as badly as she could."

"Jesus, what the fuck was her problem?" I asked. "I mean, I get that you probably had a reputation, but?—"

"Oh, I definitely had one," he said with a snort. "I wasn't the only one she went after, but she focused pretty hard on me. I never gave her the satisfaction of being able to set me off. But I knew one day I was going to lose my shit, so…well, the idea of leaving school just kept sounding better and better."

"Still, no reason to treat someone like that. Especially if you didn't do a damn thing in her class."

"Maybe she thought it was going to happen one way or another, and she just wanted me out. Or maybe she was just a giant bitch who saw someone she thought she could easily get a reaction out of."

Without the presence of anyone but Coyote and Cheyenne nearby and incapable of tattling on us, I slid over and sat beside him. He eyed me with faint amusement but didn't tense or pull away. Even when I reached to wrap my arm around his waist, he stayed where he was, staring past the flames. Sometimes, I wondered if it was the past he was getting lost in or just his thoughts. I hoped it was just his thoughts because if his previously disrupted sleep was any indication, his past wasn't a place I wanted him to get lost in too often.

"Are you going to get your GED when you get out of here?" I asked after a few minutes of silence, save for the gentle wind and the crackling of the fire.

"I probably should," he said after a moment, eyes still off in the distance. "I can't go back to what I was doing before."

"What were you doing before…before you got arrested," I said, careful not to draw too much attention to that particular gap in his history. I only knew that he had badly hurt a couple of people, bad enough to warrant felony charges and a hefty prison sentence. He had always given…well, I couldn't say hints because he didn't do hints, and I didn't catch onto hints very well. So, it was a lot more accurate to say he had made it clear he did not want me to pry into that particular part of his past.

"Odd jobs," he said with a shrug, lips thinning. "Dead-end burger flipping. Random construction jobs where I was the guy who carried shit around. Sometimes I'd sell shit, weed, and sometimes coke for the people who could afford it. Tried to make people charge me for watching their kids, but that was fucking stupid."

"Why? I'd be charging hazard pay if people made me watch kids…probably because leaving me in charge of kids would be a terrible fucking idea."

He frowned at me. "Don't be like that."

"What?"

"Shit on yourself like that."

"That your job now?"

Reno opened his mouth and then closed it with a heavy sigh. "Look, I know I give you a lot of shit…more than you deserve most of the time, so I should probably fucking quit at some point. But I don't think you're a fuck up or an idiot. So don't treat yourself like one."

I was taken aback but quickly recovered and squeezed my arm around him as I leaned in. "I just do that shit because…it's easier that way."

"Insulting yourself is easy?"

"It's easier than letting other people do it. If I can make fun of myself, even if it's about shit I don't believe about myself but other people are gonna say anyway…how can they possibly hurt me? They can say whatever the hell they want, but if I've already laughed at myself, their punches…lack punch."

Reno sighed, staring down into the fire. "I'm sorry."

"For what? Telling me not to beat myself up?"

"No. I treated you like shit—a lot. And yeah, you used to get on my nerves, usually on purpose, I think, but…I also deserved a lot of it. I was a prick to you."

"Yeah," I said with a laugh, laying my head on his shoulder. "But I was also a dickhead to you a lot of the time. So it's pretty safe to say we were both going out of our way to be assholes to each other."

He turned his head so he could eye me with a smirk. "You could be an annoying fucker sometimes."

"And you could be the grumpiest dick on the planet," I told him with a laugh.

"You know, I'm glad we're not like that now," he said, laying a hand on my knee and squeezing it.

"Me too," I said with a heavy sigh of contentment. His hand stayed on my knee as we stared into the darkness and occasionally back to the fire. I'd never been much of an outdoorsy person but after working at the ranch for almost a year and now this little camping ‘trip', I was starting to come around to the idea. Or maybe I was just enjoying the little fantasy that I could compare this to being on a date with Reno and giving in to my fuzziest of feelings.

Whatever the case, I let myself sit there next to him, not caring when my butt began to ache in protest. It wasn't until the light of the fire started to die down that I realized we'd been sitting there for a couple of hours, just the two of us enjoying the moment.

"C'mon," he said with a yawn. "We should see if we can't shove the roll-out cots together."

"Sure," I said with a snort, getting up to follow him and then turning around. "Shit, you do that, I better get the fire."

"Not sure there's too much that can be set on fire around here."

"Our tents."

"Alright, be my guest."

Plus, for all I knew, it could like…send embers flying off in the wind and catch some of the cacti or something on fire. The last thing I wanted was a giant fire on our hands. It was oddly satisfying to kick the dirt and dust at the fire and watch it sputter, fighting to keep itself lit. Once it was low enough, I used one of the water bottles to kill the rest of the flames and mixed in more dirt until there was a sludgy mix of ashes, chunks of wood, and mud that wouldn't stay wet past sunrise.

Reno had fought to get the two cots into the tent, though it was causing a slight bulge on the sides. Slipping into just our underwear, we propped our clothes up in one corner, checking on the horses before getting into the tent to close it behind us.

Without the fire, we had no light as we fumbled to make ourselves comfortable. Neither of us was all that dexterous as we tangled ourselves around one another. Heat in a desert was generally something you wanted to avoid, but I was immediately drawn to the feel of his bare, warm skin brushing and pressing against mine.

"Perv," he muttered affectionately when my accidental brush against his dick with my hand became purposeful.

"And you love it," I told him, feeling him growing hard.

If I'd been thinking romantically, I would have tried to draw him out of the tent. The idea of having sex under the stars in the middle of nowhere was appealing. But my little head took over where my heart might have served just fine, and in seconds, I was wriggling out of my underwear.

Even without the stars overhead, I could feel my heart thumping excitedly when I gripped his hard shaft. And I groaned when he used the lube I'd smuggled out to slide his fingers into me. A few minutes later, he was above me, holding tight as he pushed into me, making me moan freely in our isolation as he stretched me open.

One of my greatest fears during my time jumping from boyfriend to boyfriend had always been that one day, I would grow tired of the sex. That one day, the things that had driven me crazy would barely tickle the pleasure centers of my brain. So many things in my life that I'd been into had lost their luster, and I was left staring at dull, shineless things that I no longer wanted to look at.

Yet as Reno began to pick up a rhythm and depth that sparked stars in front of my eyes, I realized he was the longest-running, consistent sexual partner I'd ever had…and I wasn't losing interest. I wanted these moments for as long as possible. I wanted it to be him inside me, gripping my wrists and closing his mouth over mine as I cried out while I came. And I wanted it to be him I felt swell inside me as he buried himself completely, growling fiercely as his orgasm washed over him.

Then, when it was over, we lay there on our sides. I couldn't see him, but I could feel him. Our legs twined through each other, one of his hands on my hip and one of mine splayed on his chest. I could hear him, the way his breathing slowly eased, first from the orgasm and then the deep, steady breaths that signaled he was quickly falling asleep.

I lay there, feeling a sense of peace I didn't think I'd ever felt, well, not as an adult. I let his breathing take me deep into my own relaxation, carrying me toward the gentle abyss of sleep and hopefully peaceful dreams.

The soft whinnying was annoying at first. That was until I felt something move, jostling me and making me aware that I wasn't asleep. The whinnying wasn't a product of my dreams but reality. Cheyenne and Coyote were carrying on, not quite panicked, but there was no denying the nervousness and fear in their sounds.

"What is it?" I asked in a low voice as I felt more than saw Reno sit up.

"I don't know," he said in a quiet, tight voice. "We need to find out though. Something tells me those horses wouldn't fuss if it was just the wind."

My nerves tightened, and I grabbed my clothes and began to pull them on as I felt Reno doing the same. We both froze when we heard a crunch of hard dirt nearby, my eyes traveling toward the sound…which was almost opposite to where we'd tethered the horses.

"That…sounded heavy," I whispered.

"Shh," he chided almost too quietly to be heard. "We don't?—"

"Alright," a rough voice barked, so loud in the quiet that I jerked. I probably would have scrambled upright if Reno hadn't put a hand on my chest. "We know you're in there. So c'mon out. And don't do anything stupid. We're armed. And we don't need too much of a reason to shoot you dead."

"We?" Reno hissed quietly in a grimace.

Well, apparently, we weren't as alone out here as I'd thought.