Chapter 8

Astrong hand clasped around Cathleen's own and Macauley began to pull her out of the healer's quarters, much to her surprise. At first, she had thought it was perhaps for the best if he left and she went to bed. Anything else would complicate things, no matter how much she craved to spend more time with him. But now she had no choice but to follow him out into the gardens, the first blast of chill on her skin making her shiver.

She was still in her night garments and though it was dark and quiet in the gardens, Cathleen couldn't help but fear that someone would see her like this. She glanced around for any signs that there was someone else there, but she couldn't see anyone.

Still, that didn't mean they were entirely alone.

"Where are ye takin' me?" she asked, though she feared she already knew the answer.

"I told ye, I cannae tell ye," said Macauley, predictably. "But I will show ye."

It didn't take them more than a minute to reach their destination. It was a storage room filled with hay, a squat and narrow building that didn't seem to have anything special about it.

"Wait here," Macauley said, before disappearing inside. Cathleen looked around her once more, arms wrapping around herself to battle the chill of the night. More so than before, she was acutely aware of the fact that she was hardly wearing any clothes and she couldn't believe Macauley hadn't even let her grab a coat before bringing her here.

When he came back out, though, he was holding a small mountain of blankets in his hands, much to her relief. With a swing of his arms, he tossed them onto the low roof and then stood in front of Cathleen, offering her his hand.

"Come. I'll help ye."

She hardly needed his help. Even in the dark, she could easily spot the right places to step and hold onto in order to climb, and ascending would be a matter of seconds. Still, she let Macauley boost her up to the roof, pulling herself up onto the ledge and waiting for him.

He used the same points she had identified to climb up, swiftly making his way over the wall. Then, he laid one of the blankets down onto the roof and Cathleen settled on it, wrapping the other around her shoulders.

Instantly, she relaxed a little, the warmth seeping into her body. Next to her, Macauley lay back against the roof and so Cathleen did the same, turning her head to look at him.

"Why here? she asked.

Macauley gave a small shrug. "I like tae watch the stars," he said. "An' the sky is clear tonight."

It was true, Cathleen thought as she turned her gaze to the sky. There were a few grey clouds, but through them, she could see the stars, shining brightly against the darkness. Cathleen couldn't trace any constellations, but she still liked to look at the twinkling lights, slowly creating her own patterns.

She wondered if any of them matched those traced by people centuries ago.

Every now and then, she glanced at Macauley from the corner of her eye. Who would have ever thought he would enjoy looking at the stars? Taking one look at him, she would have never guessed, what with how rough he looked. It seemed he was full of surprises, and Cathleen couldn't help but wonder what else she would come to discover about him.

"Me faither used tae show me the stars when I was a bairn," Macauley said quietly, his baritone voice barely disturbing the silence of the night. "He taught me the names of the constellations an' how tae find them. He was always fascinated by the stars."

"An' ye?" asked Cathleen.

"I like them, too," said Macauley. "But I dinnae think anyone ever loved them as much as he did."

For a while, they fell in a comfortable silence, nothing but the sound of the breeze around them. When Cathleen felt something on her hand, she glanced down to see Macauley wrapping his pinkie finger around hers, the gesture bringing a smile to her lips.

"Did yer faither teach ye how tae fight?" he asked, breaking the silence between them.

"Aye," said Cathleen. It wasn't a lie, not entirely, at least. He had been responsible for all her training, even if he wasn't always the one to spare with her. "He thought a lass must ken how tae defend herself."

"He's right," Macauley said with a chuckle. "If I had a daughter, I would teach her tae fight."

Cathleen hesitated. "He's gone now. An' so is me maither. They died a year ago."

Pushing himself up onto his elbows, Macauley turned to face Cathleen with a somber look. "I'm sorry. It is never easy, losin' yer parents. Is that why ye an' Bonnie left yer home?"

The real reason rushed back to Cathleen, along with a wave of guilt. There she was, enjoying this night with Macauley, lying right to his face and making him feel sorry for her when she didn't deserve it. She couldn't let her guilt overpower her, though. She couldn't reveal anything to him.

"Aye, it was," she said, the lie undetectable but no less painful for it.

Shifting a little more so that he was all but hovering over Cathleen, Macauley said, "I'd like tae have me prize now. Fer defeatin' ye."

Cathleen sighed, shifting as well so that she could look at him. "An' what is it that ye would like?"

"I'd like tae ken why ye are here," he said. "What, exactly, brought ye tae our lands?"

It wasn't what Cathleen had expected him to ask at all and the question caught her by surprise. Her heart raced in her chest and a knot began to form in her throat, choking her. What could she say to him? How could she appear truthful while still satisfying his curiosity? Surely, it wouldn't be enough to insist they were simply looking for work or that they wanted to be as far away from home as possible, since she had already tried those explanations and they hadn't been enough for him. Would insisting make her look more suspicious? Was there something else she could say to convince him?

In the end, she settled for something that contained a part of the truth, at least. "There was a man," she said. "An' we had tae leave because o' him."

"A man?" Macauley asked. "Who?"

Cathleen had hoped that her answer would force Macauley to take a step back, that it would be awkward enough to put an end to this conversation, but clearly, that hadn't worked. Instead of spinning another tale, though, she simply shook her head.

"I dinnae wish tae speak about it," she said, and then, just so Macauley wouldn't insist, she added, "But ye can have another prize if ye wish, since I cannae satisfy ye with an answer."

That seemed to catch Macauley's interest, effectively shifting the conversation from the uncomfortable topic Cathleen didn't want to discuss. When Macauley made his request, though, she began to think that offering another prize had been a mistake.

"I'd like a kiss, then," he said, and for a moment, Cathleen's breathing stopped.

She had already gotten out of one conversation. Could she get out of this as well? It was a silly bet, of course, and she doubted Macauley would enforce the terms of the prize, but a deal was a deal and Cathleen had been foolish enough to make it, knowing there was a very good chance she would lose the fight. She had gotten herself trapped into this mess and now she had to get out of it.

Under any other circumstances, she would have been happy to kiss him, but now she couldn't allow her emotions to govern her actions. It didn't matter what her heart wanted. All that mattered was that the end was fast approaching, and soon Macauley would find out just what kind of person Cathleen was.

"Why dae ye wish tae kiss me?" she asked, delaying the inevitable. "Surely, many other lasses would like tae kiss ye."

Macauley considered her question for a moment. "There is somethin' about ye that drives me mad," he said. "Ye say ye're naethin' but a common lass, but ye speak an' act like a noble. Ye dinnae tell me anything' about yerself, an' yet I cannae stop thinkin' about ye. An' ye are so bonnie, Cathleen, so bonnie an' so kind an' carin' that I cannae even look at another lass."

Cathleen wanted to tell him that it would pass, sooner than he might even think. She wanted to tell him it was only because their acquaintance was still new and he had been caught up in the excitement of it. But hadn't the same thing happened to her, too? Wasn't she just as caught in this web as he was?

In the faint light of the moon, Cathleen traced the contours of Macauley's face with her gaze. She took in every single detail, from the warm brown of his eyes, the sharpness of his nose, the regal forehead, committing as much as she could to memory. She wouldn't have long with him, she knew, before Faolan destroyed everything.

Perhaps she could give in just this once and kiss him, she thought. But no, she couldn't allow herself so much freedom, not even for one single time. She had to be cautious with Macauley otherwise she would lose herself in this fantasy.

Leaning closer, Cathleen kissed him—on the cheek. It was a chaste kiss, a little more than a mere brush of lips but nothing she wouldn't exchange with a friend.

When she pulled back, Macauley was stunned, a hand coming up to touch where Cathleen's lips had pressed. "What was that?" he asked.

"A kiss, as ye requested. Ye didnae say where I should kiss ye."

At first, Cathleen feared that Macauley would demand a real kiss, but then he only laughed, shaking his head. "Ye're right. I should have been more careful."

Relieved, Cathleen allowed herself to smile back, small and tentative. She made to lean back down, but Macauley jumped to his feet.

"We should head back," he said. "It's cold an' all ye have is this blanket."

Though Cathleen hadn't noticed it before, now that Macauley had mentioned it, she did feel a little chilly, the blanket too thin to truly fight off the cold when she was hardly wearing anything underneath. Perhaps it was safer that way, she thought, putting some distance between them for the night, and so she stood and proceeded to jump off the roof, landing gracefully on the ground.

Above her, Macauley looked at her in disbelief. Cathleen grinned at him, pleased to find him surprised. "What?" she asked. "Did ye think I wouldnae be able tae jump down?"

"I didnae think ye could climb up," Macauley pointed out. "An' ye didnae correct me."

"I didnae think I had tae. An' well, perhaps I enjoyed havin' yer hands on me." Perhaps it was too much, but Cathleen couldn't help it. Every part of her wanted Macauley closer, demanding that she entice him, and there was only that much self-control she could exhibit.

Huffing out another laugh, Macauley jumped down, joining Cathleen on the solid ground. "Too many surprises fer one night," he said. "Go, lass, before I ask fer a proper kiss."

Would I give it tae him if he did?

Perhaps she would. A part of her wanted him to ask, just to see what would happen. A part of her wanted to forget all about the plan and do as her heart commanded, her hands itching to pull him close.

But it was better that he didn't. Cathleen must have lost her mind to think there was any chance of romance between them. She had ruined it all before they had even met.

With one last glance at Macauley, she left, disappearing into the healer's quarters, only to find Bonnie there, sitting by the table, waiting for her.

"Where were ye?" she asked, a curious glint in her eye.

Cathleen hadn't been gone for long, she knew. She also knew she didn't need to tell Bonnie anything for her to know, if not where exactly she had been, then at least who had been her companion.

"Ach, I am doomed, Bonnie," Cathleen said, as she pulled out a chair and all but collapsed on top of it. "I was with Macauley."

"O' course ye were," said Bonnie, but she sounded only a little exasperated and mainly amused.

"He showed me the stars."

"Did he? How romantic o' him."

Bonnie didn't try to tell her how much of a bad idea falling for Macauley was and Cathleen was grateful for it. Certainly, she was well aware of the fact that Cathleen already knew. The last thing she needed was a lecture from her sister on the dangers of fraternizing with the enemy.

"I must stay away from him," Cathleen said, pouring all her conviction into the words. "I cannae let him sway me."

"I dinnae think he has tae try very hard," Bonnie pointed out. "Are ye already fallin' fer him?"

Cathleen hesitated. She didn't want to admit it, but she couldn't deny it either. It was mad, of course; she hardly knew Macauley, so how could she be falling for him? But she couldn't deny the feelings his heated gaze sparked inside her, she couldn't ignore the way her heartbeat picked up every time they met each other.

"I fear that I am, aye," Cathleen admitted. "But that means I am as good as dead. I must stay away from him."

Standing from her seat, Bonnie walked over to Cathleen and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. She said nothing, but she didn't need to in order to comfort her—the gesture was enough, the two of them knowing each other so well that they rarely needed to exchange words to connect and to know what the other was thinking.

"Go tae sleep," Bonnie said. "It's late. It does little good, thinkin' about such things in the middle o' the night."

Cathleen stood with a sigh, doing as she was told. Still, she doubted she would manage to stop thinking about this, even if it only brought her anguish and no solutions.