28. The Truth

Hunter

“So, what are we doing tonight? Maxine, you pick,” Mrs. Parker asked, once inside Logan’s house. “Games? Movies? Hot chocolate?”

“Ooh, hot chocolate sounds nice, thank you. Would you mind if I took a quick shower?”

Logan and Maxine went up the stairs, and Hunter followed behind them. “I can’t believe your dad is a senator,” Logan said once inside his room.

“Was a senator,” she corrected him. Maxine walked up to Logan and wrapped her arms around him. “I’ve been dying to kiss you tonight.” But Logan pulled back in response. “What’s wrong, Logan? Why were you so quiet in the car?” she asked.

Logan looked at Hunter and then back at Maxine. “Did the two of you fuck tonight?” he blurted out.

“Yeah,” she said without hesitation. “In the library, why?” Maxine looked puzzled. Hunter’s eyes met Logan’s and then looked away.

“It’s nothing,” Logan said with a smile and kissed her lips.

“Let’s talk, all three of us,” she said and sat on the bed, patting beside her with her hand. “Does it bother you that Hunter and I had sex without you?”

“No.”

“Logan, come on. Are you sure? Then, what’s the problem?”

“This is between me and Logan to work through, Max. There’s nothing you need to do,” Hunter said, leaning against Logan’s dresser.

“I’d like to think I’m part of this relationship, too,” she said, her voice unexpectedly loud, her eyes pleading for inclusion.

Hunter stepped toward her and reached out his hand. “Just go shower,” Hunter implored, his gentle touch on her arm emphasizing his sincerity, “and I promise we’ll all talk it out later. Please.”

Logan took his cue from Hunter and found a clean towel before showing her to the bathroom. “Since when do you lie to me, huh?!”

“Lower your voice. You’re overreacting and you’re drunk.”

“How many times have you fucked her without me there?”

Hunter looked down and shrugged. “I don’t know. Four or five?”

“Well, at least now you’re being honest.”

“Oh, come on. How many times did you leave me alone in bed to try to fuck her that first month? How often have you fucked her without me?”

“Only twice.”

“You’re such a hypocrite.”

“If you would’ve asked me, I wouldn’t have lied to you,” Logan shouted.

“You’re being so fucking loud. Yeah, I lied, okay? You asked me if I fucked Max in front of her family and a thousand other people, and I minimized it—for her sake.”

Logan became silent and didn’t reply, causing Hunter to walk up to him and grasp his hand. “Do you love her?” Logan asked, a plea in his eyes.

“I love you. There’s no one I love more than I love you. I don’t want her messing things up for us. Do you want to end it? We can end it tonight and never have to see her again,” Hunter proposed, grabbing Logan’s face gently.

“I love you,” Logan said. “Do you love her?”

Before Hunter could respond, there was a quiet knock on the bedroom door.

Maxine walked in cautiously, placing her wet towel and clothes down on the bed. “I can give you some privacy. I’ll head downstairs and join your family.”

Hunter pulled Logan in and kissed him, ignoring Maxine. “I love you more and more every day. We’re together and I can’t imagine my life with anyone else. You know I’d do anything for you.”

“I know that,” Logan said with a nod, digging his fingers into Hunter’s sides. Maxine cautiously opened the door and stepped out of the room.

Eventually, they joined the rest of the group downstairs for games and hot chocolate with a kick of Baileys.

Logan, adhering to his typical pattern, sat beside Maxine, playfully teasing and touching her throughout the night. Hunter didn’t care for the PDA and preferred it that way. He delighted in it as long as they both were happy. He liked the stolen looks, hidden touches, and private texts when no one else was looking. Maxine fit in naturally with the family; they loved her, making Hunter and Logan adore her even more.

Around half-past one in the morning everyone had gone to bed while Maxine, Logan, and Hunter stayed up watching television like they often did back at school. Max slept on Logan’s chest and Hunter sat at the other end of the couch.

“Maybe you guys should just spend the night. It’s cold outside,” Logan whispered to Hunter.

“There isn’t enough space here,” Hunter said, getting up from the couch. “I’ll get my car, so she doesn’t have to walk.”

“Mhhh, I can walk with you.” Maxine woke up sleepily with a long yawn. “Really,” she insisted, locking eyes with Logan. Their lips met almost immediately. Hunter only watched for a second, the sound of howling wind reminding him to get ready to face the bitter weather outside.

“It’s been almost a week since I last kissed you like that,” Logan said, stroking her face.

Maxine was silent a moment before smiling. “Let’s do something together tomorrow, just you and me.”

“We’re going ice skating.”

“Sounds perfect.”

Logan

Not two minutes passed before Mrs. Parker made her way down the stairs. She sat in a big comfy chair next to Logan and stared at him wide-eyed.

“What is it, Mom?” Logan asked in a frustrated voice.

“Are you and Hunter having problems?”

“No, why?”

“Just tell me what’s going on. I haven’t seen or heard from you for months. Are you still—together?”

Logan looked down at his lap and smiled to himself. “Yes, we are.”

“So, Maxine is…?”

“She’s … she’s with us as well.”

“Oh, you’re in a triad?”

“I guess? I don’t know all these new-age sex terms,” he joked, which made her laugh.

“Your father and I tried that once.”

“You mean apart from all the swinging you already do? Nothing shocks me when it comes to the two of you. It was with a woman?”

“A man. A young man.”

His face scrunched in disgust. “Ew, Mom. I don’t want to know. I really don’t.” The thought of his parents fucking one of his friends repulsed him.

Hunter

“This neighborhood is beautiful,” Maxine said to Hunter, on the way to his house.

Hunter took her by the hand, and they walked more slowly against the echoing pavement of the night. “It probably feels like the slums compared to where you live.”

They could see their breath against tiny snow flurries that filled the air. Maxine rested her head on his shoulder as they strolled, surrounded by suburban, overzealous Christmas lighting.

“Are you and Logan okay?”

“Yeah, we’re fine.”

“What’s going on between you?”

“Logan is emotional and impulsive. It’s one of the reasons I love him so much. But he sometimes needs extra care and sometimes … that escapes me.”

“I see,” was all she said.

“You’ve really changed our lives.”

“Me?”

“Yeah, you’ve added another element to our dynamic, and it’s been interesting exploring that.”

“What kind of element?”

Hunter thought for a moment, finding the right words. “It’s like firm … but gentle. Stable and feminine. I was thinking about it and—I think you provide that extra nurturing we don’t naturally give each other. That maternal femininity. And I mean that in a non-sexist, non-oedipal kind of way.” He laughed, remembering one of Maxine’s many lectures.

“As a feminist, I don’t take offense to your experience of me.” She chuckled, holding onto his arm more tightly.

Hunter wrapped an arm around her body and pulled her into him more, protecting her from the harsh cold. “I was in awe of you tonight. I couldn’t keep my eyes off you. And, I’m not just saying that. I live up this street here, but I want to show you something first. Care to be out for a few more minutes?”

“Sure,” she said.

They walked down a few more streets and into a wooded area near the end of the community. The playground was covered in a light dusting of snow not too far from them. They walked through crunchy, wet leaves, past twenty or so trees, and to an open area where a frozen pond reflected the moon and starlight from the sky.

“This is so beautiful,” she said in awe.

“This is where we’re ice skating tomorrow. The son of the owner of the skate shop in town pulls up and rents skates out of this creepy, old van. He’s been doing it since we were kids. Well, the dad was and then the son took over. Every Friday after Thanksgiving for as long as the pond stays frozen.” Hunter led her to a nearby bench and wiped down the wooden seat with his sleeve so she could sit. He wrapped an arm around her and cuddled her into him.

“You guys have been here a lot, I bet.”

“Oh, yeah. All the time. This was the make-out spot.”

“Oh, really? Is that why you brought me here?”

He grinned mischievously, making her laugh. “Perceptive.”

“You ever swim in this pond?”

“We did a few times. It’s disgusting. Our mothers kept telling us not to—still water and all. We were in seventh grade and trying to impress a group of girls by doing backflips off that tree over there and into the pond. We ended up with gnarly ear infections and had to miss school for a week. It was the best week ever. Logan came over after his parents would leave for work and would sneak back before his mom got home.”

“Sounds like you’ve been pretty inseparable.”

Hunter looked down at his lap and thought of Logan and their friendship over the years. Logan was the one constant in his life he could depend on. “Yeah, he’s everything to me.”

“When did you start realizing your feelings for him?”

“It’s hard to say. It was probably earlier than I realized. I remember always having a strong dislike toward anyone who would keep him from me, family, other friends, girls—especially girls. There have been so many girls between the two of us. I hope this doesn’t bother you—” Hunter said.

“No, not at all.”

“I knew my feelings for him were complex for a while. Maybe around eleventh or twelfth grade, I’d get annoyed with any girls who wanted to be near us—split us up. We took a camping trip the summer between freshman and sophomore year of college, and I guess that’s when I realized it was more than just sexual—for me, anyway. Six months later, I kissed him for the first time, and here we are now.” Hunter looked down at his feet and then over at her expectantly. The feeling he got from being able to confide in Maxine provided a sense of security he hadn’t felt with anyone but Logan.

“What the two of you have is very special. Your love is so strong and genuine I know it will last a lifetime,” she said, looking out at the moon reflecting on the pond. “Do you want to talk about what happened earlier?”

Hunter looked down at his lap, knowing well what she referred to. “What do you mean?”

“In the library.”

“Max—”

“You’ve been faking it,” she blurted. Hunter shook his knee, trying his hardest to think of something to say. A lie, any lie. “You don’t have to excuse it. It’s your body’s natural response.”

“It’s not about you, you’re great.” Hunter realized that it wasn’t the first time he had said those words to a woman.

“Have you thought about the possibility that maybe you’re …” she said, her voice trailing off at the end.

Please, don’t say it. “What?”

“Gay? It’s totally fine to be—”

The unexpected lump in his throat became hard to swallow. “No! I’m not gay. I love women, I love having sex with women—”

“Hunter.” She tried to interrupt, but Hunter took her hand in his.

“Max, I promise. I was just really nervous. We were in your house, and there were a million people around.”

“You can’t finish unless Logan is there.”

Hunter laughed as if hearing the most ridiculous thing in the world. “What? Yes, I can.”

“It’s okay,” she stressed. “I’m not sure there is a place for me in your relationship. You guys fighting tonight—I don’t want to be the one to come between that.”

The harsh wind made Hunter’s cheeks tingle, and he dropped his eyes to his lap, a chill shooting up his spine. “That argument today … it wasn’t about you. Logan and I just have to get on the same page.”

“And you will. I know you will.”

“Max.” Hunter brought her cold hands to his lips and blew warm air against them. “Stay with us, okay? Just stay.”

“It wouldn’t feel right. Besides, the energy is off,” she said, placing a hand on his cheek. “You need to tell Logan about yourself. Tell him that you’re not attracted to women. Tell him that you love him and can’t imagine loving anyone else.”

“It’s just—I can’t … It’s bound to end, you know. This thing with Logan…” The thoughts Hunter never imagined saying aloud now poured out in a way that scared him. “We’re living in a fantasy. Every day I wake up and wonder when it will come crashing down. When will he finally meet the woman of his dreams and realize he could never have a family with me? He’s always talked about having children and a family one day. I can’t give that to him.”

“Of course, you can. Lots of men do it—”

“It’s not normal. Guys do it, yeah.” He shrugged. “But we’re not like that. I know what he wants. I see who he checks out. I know the porn he watches.”

“So, you agreed to adding me to your relationship because…?”

“I don’t want to lose him.”

A look of hurt spread across Maxine’s face as her brows furrowed in pain. “Shit, Hunter.”

“But I think you’re amazing. I really do. I don’t want you to leave us. He’s happy, I’m happy, you’re awesome—”

She looked as if she’d tear up at any moment, but never did. She wiped away at the inner corner of her eye, but it could’ve been the wind. “Have you thought about me? What I want? It’s just not fair to me. I’m not your savior.” She got up to her feet and placed a hand on the sides of Hunter’s face as she looked down at him. “You can be happy. Really, truly happy.” Leaning forward, she pressed her warm lips on his cold forehead, and Hunter closed his eyes in response.

As they got up to leave, a few tears ran down the sides of his nose and landed on his lips, but he wiped them away with his sleeve. It was probably just the wind.

They walked back, arm in arm, more hurriedly this time, desperate to escape the bitter cold. Much to Hunter’s surprise, Logan sat on the front steps of Hunter’s house with his hands in his pockets and a big smile on his face.

“Hey,” Hunter said, confused. “What’s going on?”

“I couldn’t wait until tomorrow to see you,” he said, with a shrug.

Hunter chuckled and put a hand on Logan’s shoulder, releasing Maxine, and then opened the front door. “Let’s get inside, man.”

“I’ve been out here for over twenty minutes. Where were you guys?”

The following day, Hunter woke up in their family room next to Logan, while Maxine slept in Hunter’s room. Logan rushed home before anyone knew he was gone.

As Hunter walked up the stairs, he heard a feminine voice coming from the kitchen.

“Hey.” Maxine gave him a big smile when he walked in. She looked like she was taking the last few bites of her breakfast, and his father leaned against the counter, drinking a cup of coffee. “Your dad made me the best omelet I’ve ever had.”

“Oh, stop,” Mr. Richardson said with a laugh. “It was really terrible.”

“Not at all, shells enhance the texture.” She laughed, and then he did. Hunter didn’t know how to handle the scene with his dad acting like a decent human being.

“Thank you so much, Mr. Richardson. I’m going to get ready,” she said politely, bringing her dish to the sink.

“Just leave it there. Hunter will take care of it,” he said, looking at Hunter. Hunter almost turned and left with her, but his father stopped him.

“Can you stay down here a minute?” he asked. “Have a seat.”

Hunter rolled his eyes and sat down, begrudgingly, at the counter. “What?”

“Why was Logan here last night? Wouldn’t you having a girlfriend be a clue for him to spend the night at his own house, for once?”

Hunter shrugged. “I—I dunno.”

“Are the two of you gay? I just don’t understand why you slept downstairs with Logan and not upstairs, in bed, with a hot girl. Like a pair of faggots.”

Hunter’s ears were on fire; his response couldn’t hesitate. “Yeah, flaming. Look, I—I don’t know. We left the Parker’s and went for a walk around the pond. Logan was here waiting for us,” Hunter explained, deflecting heat off himself.

“It’s strange,” his father said, leaning back against the counter. “If you need me to keep him away so you can have some alone time, just say so.”

“Do you think he wants to fuck her or something?” Hunter feigned, suppressing a laugh.

“I think he wants you,” his father said. Hunter laughed as best he could, hoping that his comment would seem ridiculous. Logan’s behavior was getting out of hand and blowing their whole cover, Hunter decided. “I’m serious. Anyway, plan for something nice this evening. Your mother and I have a reservation for a nice dinner at the new hotel in town, the Valley Creek Inn. Use it for Maxine instead, and I’ll drop you off.”

He could use the time to talk to Max and convince her to stay. The uncertainty of what Logan would do if he didn’t have someone to fuck weighed on him.

“Have you heard from Max? When’s the last time she called you?” Logan asked Hunter, staring down at his phone.

It was the second week of December and the last week of school before the end of the fall semester.

Logan paced around the living room erratically, tapping away at his phone. “Do you think she’s pissed at us? Did you say something to her?”

“What? Me? No. I’m sure she’s just busy,” Hunter lied.

“You think we should call the cops or something? Her family?” Logan’s voice raised an octave.

Not used to seeing Logan so worried, Hunter swiftly rose from the couch and wrapped his arms around him, catching him by surprise. Logan’s head found the nook of Hunter’s neck as he swayed ever so slightly. The physical contact made Hunter’s cock spasm in his pants, but he knew it wasn’t the best time to get horny. “Hey, relax,” Hunter said in a soothing whisper. “We’ll find her.”