23. Arit

Chapter twenty-three

Arit

N ixon and I spend the next hour helping each other feel better, which thankfully includes no clothing. Feeling his warm skin against mine, seeing the light back in his eyes, and listening to his moans of pleasure rather than pain is soothing the frayed edges of my own life force.

Never, in all my years on earth, have I ever been more worried or paralyzed with fear for another being than I was by what was happening to Nixon. Learning to love another was scary, but to see that love challenged so soon after its inception was terrifying. To say my understanding of humans and their wildly fluctuating emotions has changed would be a gross understatement. Now, more than ever, I know exactly why people react the way they do when their loved ones are at risk. And I know firsthand the lengths they would go to in order to save them. Although I do believe Nixon and I got off easy compared to others.

When we finally emerge from our room, needing food for Nixon and answers for both of us, we find Ada in the sitting room off our hallway. “Well aren’t you two looking better?” she remarks, and I can tell without even looking that Nixon is blushing. I’m not sure what’s happening between us, but the connection I share with Nixon is expanding and shifting to allow us more insight into each other’s thoughts and feelings. I swear sometimes I can hear him thinking in my head.

“We’re feeling better,” I reply since I know Nixon is embarrassed. He shouldn’t be. I’m not embarrassed for loving and needing him. I give his hand a squeeze. “Thank you for helping Nixon. We have a lot of questions, including how long that tea will last, but for now, is there something Nixon can eat? And somewhere we can sit together to talk?”

“Of course!” Ada pops up and motions for us to follow down another hallway. “There is a lot to discuss, but we’ll get to it over time. You’re welcome to explore the grounds. I just ask that you stay out of the east wing here since that’s where the other Fates work.”

“Other Fates?” Nixon asks, awe clear in his voice.

“Sure,” Ada answers, looking over her shoulder with a humorous smirk. “There are hundreds of us. Not all here, of course, but all over the world. There are a lot of lives that need looking after. As the population changes, so too do our numbers. Just like the reapers.”

She turns into a large common area full of casual and more formal seating, where I see two people sitting together, talking quietly. When they notice us, they both turn, seemingly curious about the newcomers. I can tell immediately the woman is a reaper, but strangely, I can’t feel her presence. The man she’s with looks human, but there’s a bright, ice-blue ring around his brown irises that I don’t understand.

Ada waves to them. “Dee. Trey. I’m glad you’re here. This is Arit and his mate, Nixon. They’re just learning what their connection means and have yet to make their choice. Once they’re more in the know, would you guys be up to chatting with them? I’m sure they’ll have questions that would be best answered by another mated couple.”

Bright smiles greet Ada’s words as the couple stands to come over and meet us, while I momentarily pick my jaw up off the floor. I’m stunned to hear Ada so casually reference that there’s another reaper who has found a mate. Like there are a lot of us out there, and Dee and Trey just happen to be one couple out of dozens. Maybe more. I can tell Nixon is just as shocked, but I can also feel him mulling over the word choice . I send him back a mental question mark, indicating I have no idea what that comment meant either.

“Of course,” the woman offers, holding out her hand to shake. She’s got black hair like mine, pulled back into a long ponytail that makes her look quite young. If I had to guess, I’d say she was less than half a million years old, though I’ve definitely never met her before. “I’m Dee, and this is my mate, Trey.” I detect a hint of a Latin American accent but figure we can swap our backstories later.

“Nice to meet you guys,” Trey adds as he shakes Nixon’s hand and then mine.

“You guys too. I’m kind of speechless at the moment. I have no idea what’s going on, not that I knew anything about reapers before a month ago, but now, apparently, they have mates? And human ones, at that? I’m going to need a minute to process,” Nixon says, taking the words right out of my mouth.

Everyone else laughs like this is a perfectly normal conversation to be having and Nixon is just the funniest guy, but I’m not laughing as I drape my arm over his shoulders and pull him to me for a hug. “What the fuck is going on?” I whisper to him so quietly it’s almost on the verge of being a thought rather than words.

He hugs me back, thankfully ignoring everyone else for the time being. “I have no idea.” He squeezes me, and I can feel him mentally trying to reassure me that everything is going to be fine even though he’s borderline freaking out himself.

His false bravado is somehow more reassuring than his words, and it makes me smile. I press a kiss to his neck before pulling back to take his hand again. “Then let’s get some answers,” I say, more to him than anyone else, but when I turn back to look at our small audience, they’re staring with a mixture of confusion, bewilderment, and pride.

“See.” Ada gestures to us, a beaming smile on her face. “Not even fully mated yet and already showing signs of their bond. I should have given Nixon his sight eons ago, but then, he wouldn’t have been Nixon, now would he?” She beckons us along. “Thanks, Dee and Trey. We’ll catch up with you guys later. Nixon needs food, and these two need answers.”

Dee and Trey bid us goodbye, saying they’ll see us later, and we follow Ada into a quiet but functional kitchen. Everything is self-serve, and as Ada points things out, Nixon grabs an apple, a muffin, and a cup of single-serve coffee. The fact that the Fates, or whoever runs this place, thought to include a kitchen at all is interesting and has me wondering if the Fates exist the same way I do.

Ada leads us up a small back staircase with an exterior door that pushes out onto a secluded lanai with a partial view of the ocean in one direction and the lush green valley beyond in another. “You’re welcome to come out here any time,” she explains. “There are a few of these off each wing, so everyone can take breaks, get some fresh air, or just hit up a small trail to enjoy the scenery. Our jobs are demanding, so enjoying our downtime is important.” She gives me a significant look, making me feel like a properly scolded child.

We take up residence at a comfortable table with cushioned chairs. “Now,” Ada begins as Nixon sips his coffee and peels back the wrapper on his muffin. “Who would like to start?”

The way she says that makes me want to laugh, and I finally relax a bit more next to Nixon. “I’ll start so you can eat,” I offer, nudging him with my knee. Nixon sends me a kiss in my mind, and that right there gives me the perfect opening. I turn to look at Ada. “What’s happening to us? Why can I hear Nixon in my head?”

“Because he’s your mate,” she answers simply, her long hair fluttering gently in the breeze. “You two are fated to be together. Soul mates, as I’m sure you’ve surmised. As your bond grows stronger and your connection closer to being sealed, you’re beginning to be more in tune with each other and each other’s minds. Once you’re fully mated, and your choice enacted, you should be able to communicate across space and time without the need for words.”

That has me raising my eyebrows. Nixon looks just as shocked when he glances at me. While I’m tempted to sit here for the next hour trying that mental link out, I turn back to Ada. “And this choice you keep mentioning? What choice?”

Ada looks between us, more serious than I’ve seen her yet. “Whether Arit will give up his purpose to live a mortal life with you, where you might have a family of your own, but where you will both eventually die and your souls will finally rest, together forever in peace. Or whether Nixon will give up his mortality to join you in eternity, forever bound by your purpose in the service of others, but together, even at the expense of any family or friends.

“Whatever you choose, one soul will be divided to give to the other so that they may share your life, whether through a heartbeat or through a life force, to dwell in their body until whatever end awaits you both. In exchange for this sacrifice, the recipient will bear the mark of the other in the form of a ring around the iris, a permanent indicator to all that your souls are joined and that the gift of their sacrifice is accepted.”

Ada folds her hands on the tabletop, and her movement breaks me out of my staring. I turn to look at Nixon, my life force thrumming like crazy in my chest. I can already feel Nixon’s shock, confusion, and worry, coupled with dread, love, need, and sorrow. He’s overwhelmed and understandably so. I didn’t know finding and keeping my soul mate would mean the end of everything I know either.

Nixon’s eyes are brimming with tears, even though he hasn’t blinked or looked away from Ada. “I know this seems like a lot,” she says. “Like a choice you didn’t sign up expecting to make. But the alternative is that you each go your separate ways”—Nixon whimpers and grips my hand fiercely—“which I know neither of you want to do. So the kindest way to support you is for you to be together. And that means you need to be together in one form or another.”

“Trey’s eyes,” I murmur, realizing now why they looked so different.

“Yes,” Ada confirms. “Dee has shared her life force with him.”

“And he had to give up his family?” Nixon asks, his voice small and unsure.

Ada smiles sadly at my mate. “Not everyone has a family as kind as yours, my dear. For some, the choice is easy to make.” Resting her hands flat on the table, Ada takes a deep breath and blows it out. “I’ll give you some time to talk. This is not a decision to be taken lightly. But just know, no matter what you decide, you’ll both be welcome here anytime you like. This is Arit’s home, whether he’s mortal or not. That will never change.” She stands and comes around the table, resting a hand on each of our shoulders. “I’ll be in my room if you have questions. Mine is the first door down your hallway. Trey and Dee are in the second room, if you’d like to talk to them.”

And with that, she leaves us in stunned silence.

For as long as I’ve been alive, I’ve never felt as off-balance as I do right now. There was nothing that could have prepared me for what Ada had to say. And if I’m feeling like my world has just imploded, I can only imagine how Nixon is feeling. Just this morning he thought he was dying, and now, that might be more true than ever.

Even though I’ve already made my choice, I turn in my seat to check on Nixon, only to be met with his shuddered breaths and his arms encircling my neck. I pull him close, needing him just as much. “It’ll be okay, love. Everything will work out.” But the panic and desperation I can sense blanking Nixon’s mind tells me immediately, he’s not so sure.