Chapter 13

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

MONSTER

My parents and sister are waiting for me after I’ve showered and changed, and my mom is the first to pull me into her arms for a big hug.

“You did amazing tonight,” she tells me as she squeezes me with all her might.

“I did alright,” I reply with a smirk.

Aurora scoffs and rolls her eyes but still comes in for a hug of her own once Mom lets me go.

“I’d tell you how awesome you did, but if your head gets any bigger, you probably won’t get through the door,” she says before sticking her tongue out at me.

“Are you ever going to grow out of your brat phase?” I ask her with a lifted brow.

“When it comes to you? Absolutely not!” she replies with a shit-eating grin.

My dad slaps me on the shoulder before pulling me into his arms. “I’m proud of you, son. That home run was something else. It’s going to be talked about for a while.”

My heart warms at his praise, and I can’t help but stand a little taller, beaming at him.

“Thanks. I honestly couldn’t believe it myself. Hopefully, I’ll be able to keep up that kind of playing for the rest of the season.”

“Just do your best,” Dad reminds me. “And we’ll be here watching every home game, cheering you on.”

“Oh, and so will Finn,” Aurora adds, catching me off guard.

I haven’t told them about Finn yet so how does she know I’m going to want him at as many games he can make it to?

“We ran into him and Chantell after the game, and I invited him to sit with us since Tara is abandoning me to play Dungeons and Dragons with Chantell.”

Well that makes more sense than her just randomly figuring out that Finn and I are dating.

“That’s awesome. And speaking of Finn, I wanted to tell you guys something.” I pause for a second, taking a deep breath and trying to figure out the best way to tell them that we are seeing each other. “Finn and I are dating,” I blurt out when nothing smoother comes to mind.

My mom’s eyes light up with glee, and my dad tilts his head to the side with a quizzical look on his face. Not one of disgust or disappointment, just curiosity, which I don’t blame him for since Finn is the only guy I’ve ever dated.

“Well, that explains why he was so squirrely when I invited him to sit with us,” Aurora muses. “But Finn seems like an awesome guy, so I’m really happy for you. And now that he’s agreed to sit with us, I can get to know him better.”

“You guys okay with this?” I ask my parents when they haven’t said anything.

Mom nods and pulls me in for another hug. “As long as you’re happy, I don’t care who you date.”

My dad puts his hand on my shoulder and squeezes. “I didn’t realize you were into guys, but I’m with your mom on this one. As long as you're happy, it doesn’t matter to me who you are with.”

Their words of acceptance fill my heart with warmth and make me so fucking glad that I have a family like this.

“Well, I guess we should be letting the two of you go so you can study,” Mom says, hugging both me and Aurora one more time before leaving hand in hand with Dad.

I want that kind of love. The kind that never dies, no matter how old you get.

There’s a permanent grin on my face as I enter my apartment, still riding the high of playing the best I’ve played in a long time, and the joy that my family accepted me coming out to them. My roommates are in the living room studying and look up with giant smiles on their faces as I shut the door behind me.

“Killer fucking game, man,” Nick Bronson, better known as Bronny, tells me, filling my chest with even more pride. Bronny has been my roommate for the past couple of years and is one of my closest guy friends who still attends GSU. He’s a great guy.

“That homerun was fucking epic,” Fox Kelly, or Foxly, adds after taking the pencil out from between his teeth. He’s got a notebook on the armrest of one of our oversized recliners, a textbook on the other, and his computer on his lap. He was obviously in the zone before I came in.

I’m honestly a little shocked to see him home since he’s normally out partying. Foxly is our newest roommate and someone who I’m not that close with yet, but he seems like a decent dude. He’s a freshman, and whereas Bronny and I are more introverted, he’s the exact opposite, a total extrovert. He’s the life of the party and doesn’t spend too much time in the apartment. He’s usually out with his friends or lacrosse teammates, but if he wants to stay on his team, he has to keep his grades up. Something Bronny and I have been trying to get him to understand, but up until now, it hasn’t really seemed to click.

“I haven’t played that good in maybe ever,” I tell them with a giant grin. “Give me two seconds, and then we can chat all about it,” I say before heading to my room to drop off my bag and grab my backpack so I can get some studying in, too.

Being a college athlete isn’t all that glamorous, something Foxly might just be learning now. The lacrosse season started at the beginning of the month, but he was still living his party boy lifestyle up until tonight.

“I’m surprised you aren’t out partying,” I tell Foxly when I get back to the living room before plopping into the other recliner.

Foxly sighs dramatically, leaving me dying to know what he’s about to say. “Coach reamed me out at our last game because, apparently, my grades are slipping the smallest amount. He told me if I didn’t get my act together, he’d bench me, and if the grades got worse, I could kiss my spot on the team goodbye. I don’t know what the big deal is since my grades are still above what they have to be.”

“By how much?” Bronny asks with a smirk, probably assuming the same thing I am, that they are just barely above what they need to be.

“A hair,” he murmurs, making Bronny and me laugh.

“What have we been telling you since the beginning of the year?” I ask him with a pointed look.

He rolls his eyes and huffs out a breath. “Ugh, you don’t have to give me the ‘I told you so’ speech. I already feel like a dumbass,” he grumbles.

“Being a college athlete is tough work,” I tell him, trying to really drive home our point this time. “I know it seems like a good time to party during your off time, but that is the most important time to be putting your all into your schoolwork. Once your games start, you have a whole lot less time to study, and it’s fucking crazy how quickly you can go from a decent grade to failing. I’ve seen it time and time again. If you want to continue being on the lacrosse team, you need to listen to your coach and hunker down and do the work.”

“You can’t be a top college athlete and a party boy at the same time,” Bronny adds. “So the choice is up to you. What’s more important, being the guy who goes out every night and everyone knows or playing lacrosse?”

“If I get punted off the team, I’ll lose my scholarship and won’t be able to attend GSU anymore. I’m not planning on going pro as a lacrosse player, but I do want to graduate with my Bachelor of Education. I want to be a teacher and make a difference,” he tells us.

“Then don’t let partying be the reason you lose out on that dream,” I reply.

“Do you think it’s too late?” he questions softly. His brows are pulled together and there is genuine worry written all over his face.

“Not at all,” I assure him. “I’ve seen guys come back from worse. But you have to give it your all. Might even be worth hiring a tutor.”

“My boyfriend’s dad is a high school teacher, but he offers college tutoring on the side,” Bronny offers. “Want me to give you his information?”

Foxly tilts his head from side to side. “I don’t think I need it at the moment, but I’ll keep it in mind.”

Bronny nods. “Just let me know. He’s super fucking smart.”

I’ve never met Bronny’s boyfriend’s dad, but I’ve met the boyfriend, and I don’t fucking like him. He is a fucking douche, but Bronny doesn’t seem to see that. Their relationship is still new, so he’s all heart eyes for the guy, and if I said something, it would only hurt him. So, I don’t say a word, but I’m totally keeping my eye on the guy. If he breaks my friend’s heart, I might just fucking kill the guy. I’m not the violent type, never have been, but I protect those closest to me.

“Okay enough talk about how I’m a failure, and let’s talk about the best college baseball game I’ve ever seen,” Foxly requests, and I can’t help but beam with pride.

“Agreed,” Bronny says with a wide smile. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you play that well before.”

“Thanks,” I reply dryly, trying to sound offended.

Bronny chuckles and rolls his eyes. “You know you’re a fucking amazing athlete, but tonight was something else.”

“I know,” I reply quickly, replaying the highlights in my head. “I think it’s because I had a good luck charm in the crowd.”

Bronny’s brows shoot up, and he leans forward, resting his elbows on the book that’s sitting in his lap. “You can’t just leave me hanging like that. Tell me more,” he urges.

Bronny knows that I’m on the ace spectrum and that I don’t date, but Foxly doesn’t, so he doesn’t look as shocked as Bronny does.

“I went on a date last night with this awesome guy, and we really clicked. Like, clicked on a level I’ve never had with anyone before,” I say, staring at Bronny with the ‘you know what I’m saying’ look.

Bronny’s eyes go even wider, which you wouldn’t think is possible, but here we are. “Are you fucking kidding?” he gasps out.

I smile and shake my head. “Nope. Finn is special.”

“So you’ve got yourself a boyfriend, and now you’re outperforming all your previous records?” Foxly checks, not picking up on what a big deal this relationship really is for me.

I shrug. “I guess so.”

“Then you better make sure he comes to all your games. You can’t let a good luck charm like that go,” he insists.

“Are you nervous about this relationship?” Bronny asks, ignoring Foxly’s comment.

I nibble on my lower lip and nod. “Yeah, a little,” I reply honestly.

“Dude, you’re a catch, nothing to be nervous about. Any person would be lucky to be with you. But honestly, I didn’t realize you were gay, or I might have asked you out,” he says with a wink, and I roll my eyes.

“Never date your roommate,” I tell him, pointing my finger at him to enforce my point. Not that I know from experience, but it just sounds like a recipe for disaster. “But besides that, I didn’t really know if I was gay or straight. I’m on the ace spectrum, and I’ve never been attracted to anyone until Finn,” I inform Foxly, feeling like now would be a good time to fill him in.

“Shit. I never knew that,” he responds, scratching his head. “That must be fucking difficult.”

“It is, but I’ve come to terms with it…” I pause, tilting my head side to side before finishing my thought. “…mostly.”

“So Finn is the first person you’ve ever been attracted to?” he checks, and I shrug.

“Kind of.” I take a second to get my thoughts in order on how to best explain things to him. “I mean, I can point out when a person is attractive and appreciate their beauty, but I never wanted to take them to bed or anything. I never popped a random boner because my thoughts took me down into the gutter. I honestly never even really wanted to kiss someone. I enjoyed spending time with people, and I wanted a partner in an emotional way, but sexually, I wasn’t there. I didn’t have sexual desire for anyone until Finn, and that kind of hit me out of left field. I thought I was simply asexual until meeting him, and now I guess I would say I’m more ace-flux. It’s crazy how different things are with him. It’s also really fucking scary.”

Foxly nods slowly, mulling over what I just said. “That sounds insane. I couldn’t imagine dealing with something like that. Although the no random boners sounds pretty awesome. I remember when I was like thirteen, and this guy I had a crush on bent over in front of me in class, and my cock got so hard so fast I thought I was going to pass out. Of course, the bell had to ring like two seconds later, but I couldn’t stand up without giving the class a show. I told the teacher that I was just really dizzy and needed a couple of minutes. Then I put my head on my desk and thought of all these unsexy things. Thankfully, it didn’t take long for my erection to go down. Even though no one saw, I was so fucking embarrassed.”

Bronny chuckles and nods. “I think we’ve all had experiences like that.”

“I’ve never dealt with anything like that until today,” I tell them. “I was on my way out to the field and saw Finn in a GSU sweater, and for some reason, that really turned me on. Unfortunately, it’s impossible to hide a boner in baseball pants, so I had to work extra hard to make sure I didn’t get a full-blown erection. The last thing I want my parents to see is their son with a hard-on in an arena full of people.”

Foxly and Bronny both laugh, and I can’t help but join them.

“Dude, that would have been mortifying. Good thing you were able to knock it down quickly,” Foxly states, and I nod.

“Yeah, who knew my mom forcing me to watch a live birth when I was twelve would be something I would purposefully choose to mentally revisit?”

Bronny and Foxly have looks of pure disgust on their faces making me laugh. “I think I had the same expression when I was watching it,” I tell them. “Apparently, my mom thought it would be the perfect form of birth control. Little did she know, she didn’t really have to worry about that.”

“How are you not scarred for life?” Foxly asks with wide eyes.

“That’s a great question.”

We continue to bullshit for a couple minutes longer before turning our attention to our studies.

Although as hard as I try to focus on my homework, my thoughts keep drifting to Finn. I need to figure out a way to see him before our next date, even if it’s just for a quick visit because six days is far too long to go without being around him.

Hopefully, Finn feels the same way and doesn’t begin to think I’m a stage five clinger.