Chapter 25 Max

Chapter 25

Max

"Dad!"

Glass shatters. Curse words bounce off the half-painted walls. My heart recoils in my chest as my stomach drops out of me.

This cannot be happening.

No, no, no.

I call over my shoulder for my brother. "McKay, I need a hand!"

The small Christmas tree McKay helped me cut down lays tipped over at my feet, shards of multicolored ornaments scattered across the still-in-progress floors. Dad is on a rampage and it came out of nowhere—first he was helping me with my tie for the New Year's Eve party tonight, his hands shaky as he worked through the stubborn knot. I wanted to look nice for Ella, so Dad offered to let me borrow his dress suit. Money is tight and it didn't make sense to buy something new.

"You look so handsome, Maxwell," my father said, his eyes prideful, smile warm.

"Thanks, Dad."

Trembly fingers fiddled with the teal-blue fabric, sliding down the length of the tie. Everything was fine. Everything was perfect. An enchanted evening of music, fireworks, and midnight kisses that just might lead to more commandeered my mind as the clock ticked down to 8:00 p.m.

Then he paused. My father swayed on the chair across from me, his glimmering eyes turning dull and dazed. He stared straight ahead, attention locked on my chest, before his chin slowly tipped back up and our gazes tangled.

I frowned.

I blinked at him.

"What's wr—"

He erupted.

With one staggering lurch, he reached for Mom's old dishware set on a nearby shelf and started heaving dishes at the far wall, one after the other.

I was frozen with shock.

"You son of a bitch," he snarled through yellowing teeth. "You have no right to be in my goddamn house after what you did."

I grabbed his wrists in an attempt to stop him. "Dad, don't!" I begged, confusion strangling me. "Nobody's there. It's just you and me."

His eyes were feral as saliva dribbled down his chin and he struggled out of my grip. "You're a bastard, Rick. A no-good parasite who stole everything from me."

I reached for him again before another plate left his hand and shattered near the front door. "I'm taking you to the hospital."

"The hell you are!" Dad sliced an arm through the air and everything on the kitchen table went flying: a vase of poinsettias gifted by Ella's mother, two half-filled mugs of cocoa, and a candle that caught on the lacy tablecloth and quickly bloomed into a deadly spark. I raced to put out the traveling flame before it burned the entire house down and looked up at my father as he headed to his bedroom, knocking the tree down along the way.

Smoke billows now as my heart dismantles, one horrified piece at a time. "McKay! Fuck ," I seethe, knowing my brother is in his room, right down the hallway. I yank the cloth from the table and wad it into an angry ball, the acrid odor of burning fabric making my stomach roll.

McKay slogs down the hall looking like shit. Dark, glossy eyes meet with mine as my chest heaves. I toss the tablecloth aside and fist my hair. "Something is going on with Dad," I tell him, kicking at the mess all over the floor.

My brother sniffs, glancing around at the destruction. "You sound surprised."

"He's sober. He's been sober ," I insist. "Something is wrong. I don't care what he says, I'm taking him to the hospital."

"Good luck with that." More crashing sounds blast from the other side of Dad's bedroom door.

Frowning, I narrow my eyes at McKay. "Are you sober?"

"Nope."

"Awesome. Fucking brilliant." I scrub a hand up and down my face. "I need you, man. I can't keep doing this alone."

He lets out a humorless chuckle. "Alone?" he parrots mockingly. "You're not alone. You have a pretty redhead on your arm who thinks you're the center of her universe. You have Dad's undying love and always have. You have a shining future ahead of you."

I gape at him, still frowning.

"You have everything and I have jackshit." His jaw tenses as he folds his arms. "Brynn dumped me."

I can't help the stab of sympathy that hits me, despite it all. Swallowing, I look away, down at the scattered glass. "I'm sorry."

"I'm sure you're devastated."

"I am. I was hoping it would work out between you two."

"Mmm." McKay steps forward, his balance wobbly. "You knew it wouldn't. When does anything ever work out for me?"

Anger overrides the sympathy. "Knock it off with the self-loathing bullshit. You're better than that."

"But not better than you."

"It's not a competition!" I shout, throwing my hands up. "What happened to you? What happened to us?"

" You happened." He shoves a finger in my face. "You and your good luck, your moral high horse, your inability to ever see me as your equal…and her ." His finger shoots to the front window, aimed at Ella's house. "Your happy ending is written in the stars, isn't it? You get the girl. You get the fairy tale. And I get nothing. The-fucking-end." He punctuates each word, his fury climbing.

Mine does the same.

His words aren't fair.

"Guess so," I mutter. "I'm leaving after graduation." My heart palpitates at the admission because it's not something Ella and I have discussed yet. But I know it's what she wants…and I think it's what I need. Stepping closer, I cross my arms and stare him down. "I've held down the fort for years, ever since Mom left. I've sacrificed everything for you, for Dad, for this house and this family. Now it's your turn. You can take on some fucking responsibility for once. You can take care of Dad while I try to live a semblance of a life."

McKay's teeth clack together as he processes my tirade. "You're leaving with her?"

"Yeah, I am."

"You're an asshole."

" I'm the asshole?" I counter. "Christ, McKay. I've done everything for you. Cooking, laundry, taking on the role as Dad's caregiver while you drink with your buddies, play basketball, date, live, and enjoy your youth. I finally have something worth living for now and I…" I let my voice trail off, regretting the words instantly.

His eyebrows rise with distinct hurt. Silence festers between us, only compromised by the echo of my careless words. McKay looks down at his feet, his expression wilting. Muscles locking. "Something worth living for, huh?"

I blink, shaking my head. "I didn't mean it like that."

"You did."

"No…no, I just meant that I finally have something for me ." I slam a palm to my chest. "I deserve that. I've earned that."

"Right." The fight leaves him as he takes a step back and glances down the hallway to where the noise has since quieted. "I need to clear my head."

"McKay—"

"Don't follow me," he says, spinning on his heel. "You're right, Max—you deserve a life free of your useless tagalong brother. Doesn't matter the pact we made when we were kids. It doesn't matter that I've spent years distracting myself with pointless bullshit, begging for time to speed up so we could finally get out of this town together and chase the dream you promised me."

My lips part but no words fall out.

Tears blur my vision.

I think back to summers at the lake when we'd dunk underneath the water and stare at each other through the wall of murk and gray. A future unfolded there, a future for both of us. Somewhere far away from here, the two of us traveling the world, sightseeing and leaving it all behind for good.

I promised him that.

"You and me, McKay," I said to him as we dried out by the embankment's edge, staring up at the clouds. "One day, it'll just be you and me."

Guilt gnaws at me, mingling with bitterness and bone-splintering sadness. We were just kids then. I didn't think he'd be hanging on to those innocent words through adulthood, waiting for me to pack my bags and haul him away from here.

I don't know what to say. I realize now that words have weight. Words have consequences, a power to root themselves deep within a person, shaping futures, and disassembling even the most resilient bonds. Words are never innocent. They're either weapons or remedies. Like seeds, they grow and expand, becoming skyscraping trees or invasive weeds.

McKay stumbles into his shoes and searches for the keys to the truck. "Happy New Year," he mumbles, headed for the front door.

"McKay, wait. You can't drive."

"Try and stop me."

"I'm sorry. Please, let's talk about this and—"

The door slams shut and everything goes silent. I glance around the chaotic house, my emotions in my throat, my heart still pounding. I think about Ella getting ready with Brynn, excited to ring in the new year with me, eager for an easy, romantic night watching fireworks paint the lake in every color.

I rub my face with both hands, then loosen my tie. Stomping toward the bathroom, I pull a pill bottle out of the medicine cabinet, sprinkle two tablets in my palm, and fill a paper cup with water.

Dad is belly-flopped on the mattress when I enter his bedroom. "Dad," I call out. "Take these to help you sleep."

"Mmmph," he says.

"Please."

I wonder if he hears how much pain laces that single syllable. He lifts up slightly, twisting his head toward me on the pillow. "Maxwell," is his groggy greeting.

"I'm taking you to the doctor tomorrow, first thing in the morning. You're not well."

He slow-blinks in my direction as I set the pills and water on his bedside table. My father reaches for the items with a quivering hand and swallows down the sleeping pills. "I'm fine, Son. I just need to rest." He chugs the water and collapses back to the mattress with a tired sigh. "Thank you for taking care of me."

"Yeah." My jaw is tight, my fight weak. "Happy New Year."

"Hmm," he mumbles, his eyes closing. "Give your girl a kiss at midnight."

I try not to let his words coil like a snake around my heart. "Good night," I whisper, leaving the light on as I move out of the room.

There's no way I can get Dad to the hospital on my own right now. I need McKay's help and he left me here alone… again . I have no wheels, no hope, and no girl to kiss at midnight. All I have is this mess to clean up and a daunting new year ahead that looks a lot less clear.

After standing the tree back up, I call Ella, one hand fisted in my hair as I pace back and forth in my suit, the teal tie hanging loose.

She picks up on the second ring, her voice chipper. "Hey. Brynn and I are almost ready to head over to the party. Just give us five more min—"

"I can't go." I squeeze my eyes shut, heavy disappointment stinging the back of my throat.

A long pause. "What?"

"I can't go to the party, Sunny. It's Dad. I don't know what the hell is going on…one minute he was helping me with my tie, the next he was chucking dishes at the wall." I swallow hard, forcing back tears. "He was hallucinating. Seeing things that weren't there."

"Oh, my God. I'm on my way. Brynn can drive me—"

"No," I say quickly. "You can't come over. It's not safe here."

"Max—"

"I'm serious. Something's wrong. It's like he was having one of his drunken outbursts, but I don't smell any alcohol on him. I gave him some sleeping pills to get him through the night. I'm going to take him to the hospital tomorrow…" My voice trails off as I scrub my jaw. "I thought it was the booze before, but he's been sober, Ella. I'm scared that it's something else. Something worse."

"Max," she whispers. "I'll go with you tomorrow. I want to be there."

I nod, grinding my teeth together. "Yeah. Okay. Tomorrow."

Her raspy sigh filters through the phone. "I'm so sorry, Max. Where's McKay? Is he with you?"

"No. We had a fight and he stormed out a few minutes ago." I pinch the bridge of my nose, shaking my head. "Brynn dumped him today, so he's drunk and miserable."

"Yeah," she murmurs. "She told me."

"He said he needed to clear his head. If he comes back, maybe I can meet you out for a little while. McKay can watch over Dad. Otherwise…have fun. Have the best time, okay?"

She sounds like she might cry. "I want to be with you."

"I know," I tell her, wanting that more than anything. "But you deserve this. Dance the night away with Brynn, eat a shit-ton of carbs, watch the fireworks over the water. And then tell me all about it. Please don't worry about me."

"Max…I don't know. I feel like I should come over," she insists. "It won't be the same without you."

A sad smile crests as I squeeze the cell phone in my hand and inhale a hard breath through my teeth. "Call me later, all right? I'll be here."

"Are you okay?" she asks softly. "Did…he hurt you?"

Yeah.

He hurt me.

But I don't say that. "He didn't hurt me. He's sleeping now. I'm fine."

"You're sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure. I…" I love you. I want to climb through your window later and make love to you until the sun rises and a new year dawns. I want to ride horses in fields of gold and catch sunsets and marry you on our favorite bridge. Reining in my emotions, I whisper a final send-off before disconnecting the call. "Happy New Year, Sunny Girl."

I toss my phone on the couch, pull off my tie, and collapse on the floor strewn with glass.