Chapter 50

50

ROAN

T he early morning sunlight was just beginning to filter through the windows as we finally pulled into my driveway. I could feel the weight of the last twenty-four hours settling on my shoulders. Alaina and I shared a brief glance, both of us knowing that whatever was between us would be tested now that we were back in our real lives. We had been in a little cocoon with no outside influences. First the hotel room and then the plane. It was just the two of us, no jobs and no little boy that needed to be considered. But we had both said we loved each other. I had to stop second-guessing everything.

"I don't think your car is going to make it through this weather," I said.

She grimaced. "Yeah, probably not."

"I'll get you home."

"Thank you."

She grabbed my hand. "Hey, it's going to be okay, right?" she asked.

I smiled. "Yes. I expect a learning curve, but we'll be okay." I leaned down and dropped a quick kiss on her lips before I unlocked the door and let us in. As we walked into the house, the smell of pancakes hit us immediately. Alaina and I exchanged a look. We left our suitcases in the foyer and stepped further into the house.

Cate and Rafe were sprawled out on the couch, watching cartoons, while Jake stood at the stove, expertly flipping pancakes.

"Morning," I called out, my voice a little hoarse from lack of sleep.

Rafe turned, his face lighting up when he saw me. "Dad! You survived Indiana!" He jumped up and ran over, giving me a tight hug.

I hugged him back. "We did. Did you have fun with Cate and Jake?"

"Yeah, we watched movies and played games," he said excitedly.

"Let me guess what movie," I said, grinning at him.

He giggled. "I only made them watch the first one."

Jake sauntered over, grinning. "Just a trial run for when Cate and I get married and have kids."

Cate rolled her eyes as she got up from the couch. "In your dreams, idiot."

Rafe looked up at her, a mischievous grin on his face. "Aunt Cate, that's another dollar for the swear jar!"

I glanced over at the counter where a jar, now nearly full, sat proudly stuffed with change and dollar bills. "Looks like you guys had quite the night," I said, trying to keep my tone light.

Cate shrugged, a playful smirk on her lips. "Jake's a bad influence."

Alaina laughed, the sound easing some of the tension I felt. "I'm sure it was a blast."

"Jake is making pancakes," Rafe announced. "He said he knew how."

"I do know how," Jake retorted. "Come eat before you judge me."

We made our way to the table and piled our plates high with fluffy pancakes, a generous helping of sweet maple syrup, and crispy bacon on the side. Everyone found their places. Rafe looked around the table with a huge grin on his face. He was thrilled. I liked seeing him happy. He had never been a part of a big family. This was a glimpse of the future I hoped to have for him.

Cate and Jake took spots side by side, bickering playfully. Alaina hesitated for a moment, unsure where she fit in this dynamic, but I quickly pulled out the chair next to me, giving her a reassuring smile. She settled in with a thankful nod.

After breakfast and cleanup, Cate clapped her sister on the shoulder.

"Come on, I'll drive you and your stinky old dog home," Cate said to Alaina. "I know that little toy car isn't going anywhere in this snow."

"Thanks," Alaina said.

She gathered her things and Beau's bag. As she turned to leave with Cate, she caught my gaze. There was a small, warm smile but no kiss. What now? Our brief trip had allowed us to live in a bubble where it was just the two of us, but now we were back to reality, and everything was going to be different.

"I'll see you at school, Rafe," Alaina said with a smile.

I watched them leave, then turned back to Jake. "How'd everything go here?" I asked.

Jake leaned against the counter, crossing his arms. "Got here this morning. Rafe seemed to enjoy hanging out with Cate. I was just in time to catch Rafe trying to convince Cate to let him have ice cream for breakfast."

I chuckled, shaking my head. "Sounds about right. How did Rafe handle everything? He seemed excited when I got back."

"He did great," Jake replied, a smile on his face. "They watched movies, played games, and apparently, she taught him some new card tricks. He's really taken a liking to her."

I felt a wave of relief and happiness. "That's good to hear. I was a little worried about leaving him.

"He's a good kid, Roan. But Cate seemed a little out of her element."

"Yeah, he is. Thanks for helping out. Cate isn't really used to kids, from what Alaina said."

Jake waved it off. "No problem. Besides, if it means I get to hang out with Cate, I'll do it anytime."

I chuckled, shaking my head. "You and Cate, huh? Never thought I'd see the day."

Jake smirked. "What can I say? I have a way with words."

"Yeah, she seemed to be real enamored with you," I teased.

"She's into me." He shrugged. "It's a game of cat and mouse. I've got her right where I want her."

"Which is loathing you?" I replied.

"Oh no, that woman is into me," he said confidently. "She's just enjoying being chased right now. She doesn't want me to know she wants me."

"Yeah, I'm sure that's what is happening."

We both laughed, but the conversation soon turned serious. "What about Alaina?" Jake asked, his tone more somber. "What's going on with that situation?"

I sighed, leaning against the counter. "I was finally honest with her. I told her I loved her."

He looked shocked. "No shit! Well done, brother."

I couldn't help but smile. "Yeah. And she said she loves me. Our trip felt like a dream, but now we're back, and it's like what now? And then there's Rafe to consider."

"Don't overthink it, Roan. If it's meant to be, it'll be. Or go the full nine yards and get yourself some therapy. A gorgeous woman tells you she loves you and you're still having doubts? Are you fucking nuts? Do you actually love her or is that all bullshit?"

"It's not bullshit. I love her, man."

"And she loves you. So stop getting in your own way, you dumb fuck." He shook his head and let out a long breath. "Sorry, I'm just tired of watching you sabotage yourself. Can't you let yourself be happy for once in your lonely ass life?"

I glanced at him, surprised. "Don't apologize. I think I needed to hear that. When did you get so smart about relationships?"

Jake just shrugged, a small smile on his lips. "I'm a moron when it comes to relationships. It's just that you're so much worse that I seem like a Jedi master. Man, that movie is stuck in my head."

Rafe came running back downstairs with his tablet in his hand. "Look!" He shoved the tablet in my hands. "Can I have this? It's a kit to build a robot. I want to make one at home. It'll be better than the one we make in school. And it's not a toy. It's a learning tool."

Jake laughed and shook his head. "You can't say no to that. Not if it's educational. Let the kid build a droid."

"I'll think about it," I said.

He had come out of his shell during the trip, but he was also developing a new kind of attitude now that he was close to turning ten. It was a mix of independence and defiance that both worried and amused me.

"Jake, there was this one robot that could do backflips and another that could solve a Rubik's Cube in like, five seconds! I want to build one that's even better!"

Jake grimaced as he looked at me. "He's planning a world takeover, Roan. Better watch out."

I laughed, shaking my head. "Nah, Rafe has his eyes set on Mars. We're safe for now."

Jake grinned, giving Rafe a playful nudge. "Mars, huh? That's pretty cool."

Rafe beamed, clearly pleased with the attention. "Yep! I'm gonna be the first kid on Mars."

Rafe ran off to go play upstairs, leaving me and Jake alone once again.

Jake finished his coffee. "I'm going to get out of here. I'll see you at work."

"Thanks again for helping out with Rafe. It means a lot."

Jake shrugged, his expression sincere. "Anytime, Roan. Like I said, if it means I get to hang out with Cate, I'll do it anytime."

"If she complains to Alaina you're harassing her, you know I have to take their side, right?" I joked. "No offense."

"Trust me, she loves it," he insisted as he put on his coat. "That's the kind of woman I like. All hot and bossy."

"The kind of woman that hates you?" I corrected.

"For now." He grinned. "You just wait and see. Sit back and watch me work my magic."

I walked him to the door, closing it behind him. I carried my suitcase upstairs, tossed the dirty laundry into the basket, and jumped in the shower. I winced when the spray hit some of the scratches my sweet, little teacher had left behind in the midst of her blinding passion. I loved it. I loved that she turned into a wildcat.

I dressed in warm sweats and a hoodie, happy we didn't have to go anywhere. The weather was garbage and I was exhausted after the last couple of days. I picked up the box I had bought for Rafe when I was in New York. I carried it to his room and knocked on the door before stepping inside. He was lying on the floor with his tablet above him.

"Hey, I got you something," I said.

His eyes widened. "You bought the robot kit?"

I laughed. "No. I said I'll think about it. I got you this."

He jumped up. "A rocket?" he asked with wide eyes.

"Yep."

"Cool!"

We spent the afternoon building the rocket. As we worked together, I couldn't help but think about Alaina. Rafe's enthusiasm for the project made me happy. I loved seeing him happy and confident. Last year, he was shy and withdrawn. I loved that he was happy to show off just how smart he was. Now, I was going to have to work on keeping him humble. I didn't want him to be a know-it-all. We laughed and talked about his plans for the future. He was already planning his future and the many things he was going to build.

As evening fell, I found myself thinking more and more about Alaina. I wanted her to be a part of this, of us. The way she connected with Rafe, the way she made me feel, it all felt right.

After dinner and watching some TV, I tucked Rafe into bed. He looked up at me, his eyes serious. "Dad, is Ms. C going to be around more?"

I smiled, sitting on the edge of his bed. "I hope so, buddy. Do you like having her around?"

He nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah, she's really nice. And she makes you happy."

I felt a lump in my throat at his words. "She makes me very happy."

"Then you should tell her," he said simply, his innocence and wisdom shining through.

I hugged him tightly. "You're right, Rafe. I should."

I already had, but I wasn't going to tell him that.

After he fell asleep, I sat in the quiet of the living room, contemplating my future. Rafe seemed cool with things, but there was still that little voice in the back of my head urging caution. I stared at the flames dancing in the fireplace and imagined a world where I no longer had to be a single parent. I wanted someone to share the highs and lows. Someone who wouldn't think I was just bragging about my kid, but who understood and shared that same pride. Alaina fit the bill perfectly.

So what the fuck was my problem?