Chapter 14

14

RILEY

" I s he always so intense?" Angel whispers to me.

I glance over at Nikolai, who is sitting at the next table over in the library with his feet kicked up onto another chair. As if he can feel me staring, he looks up at me.

I glance away, trying not to make it too obvious that we're talking about him. I see him smirk out of the corner of my eye. Why does he have to be so damn handsome?

"Yes," I answer honestly. Nikolai is intense and serious most times. But I'm finding that he gives me little glimpses of a different side of him. One I don't want to share with anyone.

Plus, I don't even know Angel that well. We've only become somewhat friendly recently after Nikolai pointed out that she was the girl in the cafeteria that helped him find me in the library. We don't share any classes, but I have seen her around. She's often by herself, never falling into any of the cliques.

"Did he really nail Becky in the face with a ball?" Angel fights a smile. Ah, she doesn't like Becky either. We might really get along.

"It's dodgeball." I shrug. "These things happen." Angel puts her hand over her mouth to suppress her laughter. Yes, Nikolai did it on purpose, but I'd never rat him out. "Have you had problems with her too?"

"Yeah." Angel rolls her eyes. "You'd think since she is dating my brother I'd get a pass, but my brother can be as cruel as her."

"Wait." I shake my head because that's a lot to take in. "Brent is your brother?"

"Twins."

"Dang." I didn't see that coming. "My brother was a dick too."

"Was?" Well, crap.

"I have no contact with him." I don't add that it's because he's dead. And that I'm not sad about it in the least.

"That sounds nice." Angel blows out a breath. "I'll never get that luxury. Not with my family." She shifts in her seat. I get the sense she doesn't want to talk more about her family. I can relate.

"You think anyone else is coming?" I glance around the empty library. School let out twenty minutes ago. I'd signed up for the book club a few weeks ago trying to put myself out there more. I need to learn to be more social if I plan to go off to college.

"I'm gonna guess no."

"Well, I guess that means it's just the two of us." To be honest, I'm really not that upset that it will only be us.

"And your shadow." She tilts her head toward Nikolai. I burst out laughing but quickly cover my mouth, remembering we're in the library.

"He's not too bad of a shadow," I admit.

"So you guys are a thing?"

"I don't know." I chew on my bottom lip, wondering what we are myself. Nikolai confuses me half the time. Even with his little comments, like about my gym clothes. That comment is still lingering in my mind.

"I think you guys are adorable together. It's like opposites attract." She picks up a book in front of her. "One of my favorite tropes."

"It is a good one." I take the book from her and flip it around to read the back. Angel starts to tell me about it, and our conversation rolls from there. Once you start talking about books, you can never stop. It's not until the librarian comes over to tell us they are closing that we realize we've been at it for a couple of hours.

"It's sweet he just hung around while we talked about books, not complaining," Angel says as we pack up our bags.

"I've got a complaint." Nikolai stands. "You need to eat. You haven't had food since lunch." I roll my eyes at him, while Angel giggles.

"See, sweet," she whispers to me. We exchange numbers so we can text later. We each gave each other books to check out so we could talk about them.

This is the most excited I've been about something to do with school since I started here. It feels nice to have someone else to talk to besides my sister and Sal. I wish it could be this easy with Nikolai. That he would let his guard down enough to let me in.

"Do you want to eat on the way home or make something?" Nikolai asks when we get into the car.

"I'll get something at home. I'm sure you have places to be." Nikolai never sticks around the house. It shouldn't bother me—it's not my business—but it does. He always knows what I'm up to.

"I'll stop and get you something," he says, once again avoiding my comment. I roll my eyes and turn my head to stare out the window.

"I don't understand you, Nikolai. You do and say all these things to me, but every time I try to get to know you, you shut me down. You gloss right over my questions." I had planned to give him the silent treatment on the way back home, but my frustration with him has obviously gotten the best of me.

"There are some things you're better off not knowing." I fold my arms over my chest and keep my eyes trained out the window. "What do you want to eat?"

"Not hungry." It's not a lie. My stomach is in knots now.

"I'll pick?—"

"I'll eat at home. I have leftover lasagna I made for dinner last night," I snap at him. "You'd know that if you came to dinner once in a while."

Emma, who takes care of Matteo's homes but usually stays out at the house, told me I was going to put her out of a job. She was only joking, but it made me feel good to see how much everyone enjoyed my cooking.

"Riley."

"Please don't." I cut him off before he can say more. For once, he actually does what I ask. The rest of the ride home is silent. The second the elevator doors open, I bolt off, heading straight for my bedroom. I'm thankful that my sister isn't home tonight. She's good at reading me and would be all over me if she saw me.

I kick my shoes off when I enter my room, dropping my bag on the floor before I throw myself onto the bed. Nikolai is slowly driving me insane. I'm not sure I can take much more of it. Not wanting to think about what he might be up to tonight, I grab my Kindle on my nightstand and find something to read.

Not that it helps. All my thoughts always go right back to Nikolai.