46. Chapter Forty-Five

Chapter Forty-Five

Sev's voice is faint, cutting through my sleep. I can't tell if it's a dream or if it's real. I'm lifted up, my body weightless. Definitely a dream. I float for a little while, then his scent is overwhelming. I breathe it in deeply, a smile pulling at my lips. He smells so good. I'm enveloped in warmth and fall deeper into sleep.

Waking up a short time later, I'm confused. I blink, trying to see through the dark. It takes far too long for me to realize where I am. And that there's a giant man sleeping beside me in a bed that isn't mine. I recognize the room now as Sev's. I'm in his bed, and he's sleeping beside me. I think back to the earlier dream I had, and realize it wasn't a dream at all, but Sev carrying me here. I'm still amazed that the man can carry me so easily.

He can deadlift 450.

I'm easily half of that. I huff out a laugh, and shift on my side to get comfortable. But as I close my eyes and try to get back to sleep, I can't. My eyes don't want to stay shut. When I open them, I'm met with Sev's peaceful face. He's so relaxed in sleep. The room is dark, but small slivers of moonlight peak in from outside and I'm able to make out the curves of his face. His full lips. The bruise that is now fully formed from where I punched him. Kinda feel bad about that now, even though he didn't seem to care.

His hair is pulled back in a bun, but it's messy from sleep. I reach my hand out to brush my fingers down his cheek. His beard is so soft and full. I drag my hand over his jaw, down his neck, to realize he's shirtless. I am too. Now that I think about it, I'm only in my underwear. He must've gotten me undressed. To have slept through all that I must've been exhausted. Well, after the drugs he gave me to kidnap me, the full belly, and feeling better from him being back, I can see why I'd have a good sleep.

Problem is now I feel wide awake.

And really fucking horny.

Only it isn't just my dick talking.

It's something else entirely. Something in my chest that's aching to be free. Something that really wants to be let out.

I have feelings for Sev. Feelings I've never felt toward anyone before. No idea how that happened, when it happened, or why, but they're there. And after a week without him, I realize more and more what I really want to do. I've had a craving since I met him. Something I never thought I would ever want before. I've thought of Sev fucking me so many times. It's not something I've ever wanted anyone else to do, which is why I've never done it. But I want him to do it. I can't leave this opportunity behind. I want to know what I've been missing out on. There may never be another person I trust with this, but I trust him. And if I hate it, then I hate it and I'll never do it again. But at least I tried. I won't regret trying it with him, but I'll regret not doing it. Moving to California is going to bring so many changes, and not that I'm a people-person, but I won't know anyone out there. And though hook-ups are easy for me, something like this won't be. If I don't do it now, it'll never happen.

I press against his shoulder and throw my leg over his hips as he rolls to his back. I'm straddling him when he groans, eyes blinking open. I kiss him before he can say anything. Sev sucks in a sharp breath through his nose, hands going right to my waist and pulling me against him to thrust his erection against mine. He kisses me slowly, his hands exploring my body. The ache to have him inside me is overwhelming, so I break our kiss.

"I want you to fuck me," I whisper.

His dick throbs, fingers digging into my skin.

"Are you sure?" he asks, brushing his fingers up my back.

Tenderness from him is not what I was expecting. I'd thought he'd jump at the chance. But him reacting this way only solidifies that I've made the right decision.

"Yes," I answer.

He leans up to capture my lips with his. It's needy now, his tongue diving into my mouth and stroking mine firmly. A low rumble growls in his throat before he pulls away.

"You want to ride me?" he asks.

The thought has a shiver running up my spine. My dick twitches as I picture seeing his face as I sink onto his cock, but I don't want that this time. I don't trust myself to do this.

"I need you to do it."

"Okay, baby." He kisses my neck and taps my hip for me to move. I get off him.

Sev throws the covers off us and gets out of bed. Tugging his boxers down, he kicks them away and digs in his drawer for something. Finding what he needs, he places it on the nightstand, but I can't make out what it is. I can only assume it's lube. It fucking better be lube.

"Have you ever had anything in your ass?" he asks.

My cheeks burn. I didn't think we were going to talk about this. I just wanted him to do it. Talking makes things hard. Actions are easy. Trying to explain things? I hate that shit. Just do it and be quiet.

"No."

"Come here."

I scoot to the end of the bed and sit up, but he pushes me down. Hooking his fingers in my boxer briefs, he tugs them off and tosses them away.

"We should prepare you more," he says, placing his hand on my left knee.

"I don't want to wait," I say quickly.

He pushes my leg up so it's bent, spreading my legs for him. It's a little awkward. I feel way too vulnerable, but at least it's dark. And the hungry look in his eye is something.

"Stay like this," he says, reaching for what I can now see is lube. There's also a foil packet on the end table, which I appreciate. I hadn't thought of that, but I'm glad he did.

But also, why the fuck does he have condoms in his bedside table like he does this all the time? He better not fucking do this all the time. I'm pulled out of my jealous thoughts when I feel something cool on my dick. I hiss.

Sev lathers my cock and strokes me slowly.

"You sure you want to do this?" he asks again.

I lick my lips. "Very sure."

He lets go of my dick and gets the lube again, pouring a healthy amount into his palm. He doesn't hesitate to bring his hand to my ass and rub it in. I flinch away from him, and he chuckles.

"Relax," he says softly. "I've barely done anything yet."

I do need to relax. I'm freaking out a little. But also really excited. I don't want him to stop, I'm just nervous. He takes his time just rubbing his fingers along my hole. It feels strange, but not bad. It almost tickles but makes my dick really hard. When I feel a finger prodding at me, I clench up.

"Relax, baby," he says again, running his free hand up and down my thigh in a soothing motion.

"Sorry," I whisper, taking a breath. I focus on relaxing my body and he works on pushing his finger into me. It's the strangest feeling. Again, not bad, just different. It doesn't hurt but doesn't quite feel good. He pushes deeper. "Fuck," I groan, closing my eyes and grinding against his hand.

"I can't wait to have my cock in here," he rasps out.

And fuck, those words have me wanting this even more.

"Neither can I," I respond. "So hurry up and fuck me."

He chuckles darkly, then presses on something inside me that has me seeing fucking stars.

Holy fucking shit. That felt good.