Chapter 30

Chapter Thirty

THE RETURN HOME

" W herever have you been? I have been looking all over for you and —" Her stepmother stopped speaking as she caught a proper glimpse of Charlotte, her eyes going wide in alarm. "Charlotte? Charlotte! My goodness, what has happened?"

Charlotte tried to brush Lady Bellmore away. She could only guess how awful she looked. Her eyes felt swollen and puffy, and no doubt, her cheeks were stained with tears.

She had wandered aimlessly after she had left Dominic, his words echoing in her head. I think it would be best if you returned to London. With those words he had made it clear that now the games were over, so was their arrangement.

"Charlotte, please, you are worrying me." Lady Bellmore's voice jerked Charlotte back to herself.

"It is over." The words tumbled numbly from her lips.

"What is over?" Lady Bellmore's brow furrowed in confusion and alarm.

Charlotte gestured vaguely around them, half-heartedly trying to remember where she had put her suitcases. "Everything. All of it."

"What do you mean?" Lady Bellmore asked.

"Someone has discovered the truth about our arrangement, and so we must withdraw from the competition. Dom — The Duke, has instructed that I return to London so that he might talk to his grandmother." I will not call him Dominic. She would harden her heart; she had been a fool to soften it.

"Just because the competition is over, does not mean —" Lady Bellmore began, but Charlotte cut her off.

Her anger and sadness coloured her voice. "Does not mean what? You know of our arrangement. There is nothing more between us."

"But…" Lady Bellmore trailed off as Charlotte raised a hand, clearly indicating that she wished her to stop speaking.

Charlotte shook her head. "I do not wish to hear it. It is over; the Duke wants nothing to do with me now that the truth has been discovered."

The look of panic when the valet had knocked at the door still lingered in her mind. Although they were engaged, being sequestered in his bed chambers… I do not want him to be forced to be with me. I refuse to want him at all.

"Is that what he said?" Lady Bellmore raised an eyebrow.

"Why else would he ask me to return to London? It is clear he means to break off our engagement." Charlotte hugged her arms around herself.

Stupid. I have been utterly ridiculous. There was to be nothing between us and once more I have fallen for pretty words. She clenched her hands into fists and willed herself not to cry again.

"Perhaps he simply wishes to protect you," Lady Bellmore said reasonably.

Charlotte began throwing dresses into her suitcases with rather more force than was necessary. "I was a fool to think there was anything more between us. This has always been a business arrangement and nothing more."

"It did not look that way to me." Lady Bellmore gently took one of the dresses from Charlotte and folded it carefully as she began to do the same with the others Charlotte had piled in without a care.

"Perhaps you have been blinded by hope and optimism. After all, I know how much of a feather in your cap our marriage would have been," Charlotte snapped.

The gifts from Dominic seemed to stare at her from the cupboard, and she turned away from them, not wanting to be reminded of the kind gesture at that moment.

"That may be true, but I have seen the way you two behave with each other. And I have heard snippets of his letter. That does not sound like a man who does not care for you." Lady Bellmore was now carefully packing the dresses Dominic — no, the Duke — had given Charlotte.

Charlotte's hand went to the letter she had tucked away, but she shook her head. "Perhaps he is just a good actor. After all, rakes are rather good at telling you what you want to hear."

"I can see your mind is made up, and I know by now that there is no use arguing with you." Lady Bellmore sighed.

"Good — I have no wish to get into an argument," Charlotte said. I just want to go home, to forget this silliness, and move on with my life.

"What do you wish to do?" Lady Bellmore asked.

Charlotte gestured towards the door. "I have already asked the stables to ready the carriage. Once I have spoken to the Dowager Duchess, we can depart."

Her chest tightened as she thought of meeting with Dom— the Duke's — grandmother. The woman was foreboding, and Charlotte had not spent any time alone with her. And this is hardly the best way to make a good impression, not that that matters now.

Lady Bellmore sat next to Charlotte and gently placed a hand on her arm. "Why not allow me to speak to her on your behalf?"

Charlotte looked at her stepmother, thinking that she had misheard. "Pardon?"

"I suggested you allow me to make your excuses to the Dowager Duchess. I am more than capable of doing so, and it might yet save you some pain," Lady Bellmore repeated, her voice kinder and more gentle than Charlotte was used to.

"You would do that for me?" Charlotte felt a rush of warmth towards the woman that took her by surprise.

"I just offered, did I not? I know we have not always seen eye to eye, and that I have been rather hard on you girls, but I am not a heartless dragon. Or at least, I am trying to mend my ways." Lady Bellmore smiled at her.

Charlotte returned the smile. "Thank you."

"I shall speak to the Dowager Duchess at once." Her stepmother made to stand, but Charlotte grabbed her hand and shook her head.

"No," Charlotte said.

"No?"

Charlotte stood up and straightened her skirts, squaring her shoulders and taking a steadying breath. "I appreciate you wanting to protect me, but I feel this is something I must do for myself."

"Are you sure?" her stepmother asked.

"Yes." Charlotte caught sight of herself in the mirror. "Though I would appreciate if you would help me tidy myself before I see her."

"Of course. I could hardly bear you to be seen in such a state!" Lady Bellmore replied though Charlotte could hear a note of teasing in her words.

All in all, it took less than half an hour to make Charlotte reasonably presentable. When they were done, her stepmother surveyed her handywork and fussed at a few stray locks of Charlotte's hair.

"Well, I suppose that will have to do," Lady Bellmore sighed. "I shall finish your packing and see if I can ask the kitchens for some provisions for the journey."

"Thank you, Mother." Charlotte said, the word feeling right for the first time since she had known the other woman.

Her Stepmother's eyes widened in surprise, clearly noting the lack of sarcasm in Charlotte's use of ‘Mother'. "It is my pleasure, Charlotte."

At least one good thing has come of this mess. Charlotte would not have guessed that the trip would have allowed her to heal the relationship between her stepmother and herself, but she found she was grateful it had. Or at the very least that it has started.

Only time would tell if the change in her stepmother would remain. She reached the door to the Dowager Duchess's study, and a servant knocked and announced her.

"Lady Charlotte — how unexpected. To what do I owe this pleasure?" The Dowager Duchess was sitting in a plush armchair with a familiar dog sitting beside her. "I trust my grandson has not done something to upset you? I have little inclination to interfere in couple's affairs, but I would be happy to knock some sense into the boy."

Charlotte felt a mix of warmth and sadness as Venus spotted her and wagged her tail in greeting. She forced herself to smile, even as she felt a knife stab into her chest. "No, Your Grace, he has not upset me."

"Good. You two are a most pleasing fit. It is good to see him return to himself after so long."

Charlotte was not sure what to say to this, but she was spared from having to think of anything when the Dowager Duchess asked, "And are you enjoying your time here?"

"Yes, it has been truly lovely. I honestly cannot thank you enough for your kindness and I have really enjoyed all these games." Charlotte found that she meant it but forced herself not to think of how much of that had been due to Dominic. I will not cry. "It is why it pains me to have to leave."

"You are leaving?" The Dowager Duchess raised an eyebrow, and Charlotte balked, expecting a sharp reprimand.

She tried to keep her voice steady as she replied, "Yes. I must return to London this afternoon. My sisters are struggling without me, and I fear my father is not the support they need."

"Men seldom are." The Dowager Duchess nodded in agreement, her sharp eyes surveying Charlotte. "Could your stepmother not return without you?"

Charlotte smiled. "She could, but it would be rather improper for me to remain without her as chaperone. And in truth, I miss my sisters. We have not been apart for so long, and I worry about them."

"You care for them a great deal," the Dowager Duchess remarked, continuing to stroke the dog in her lap.

"I do," Charlotte admitted, trying not to think of how disappointed her sisters would be when she returned home with nothing to show. I will think of some other way to help them. "Their happiness is one of the most important things in the world to me."

"A noble sentiment though I am sure they would not wish their happiness to stand in the way of your own." The Dowager Duchess gave Charlotte a frank but kind look.

"I — what makes you think it does?" Charlotte was taken aback.

"I did not say it does. Think of it more as a word of caution from a wise old woman." The Dowager Duchess indicated the sofa opposite her and Charlotte sat, smiling as she did so.

She said, "I would not say you are particularly old."

"Dear child, you need not flatter me. I am old, and rather proud of the fact. Growing older is nothing to fear, odd as it may be for one so young as yourself." The Dowager Duchess laughed softly, and Charlotte was struck by how much softer she seemed when she was alone. "I have lived a good life, and in all my years, I have learned a great many things."

"I am sure you have," Charlotte said.

"Our lives are for living, dear girl. And over this trip, I have seen how soft a heart you have. How you genuinely care for others and the depths of your compassion." The Dowager Duchess smiled warmly at Charlotte, and she could not help but smile in return. "It is rare to see someone so truly altruistic."

Her cheeks flushed. This is not how I thought this conversation would unfold. "I… I do not know what to say."

"You need not say anything though perhaps it would do you well to learn how to receive a compliment. I shall have to instruct my grandson to give you more practice. Men do so easily forget the importance of such things." The Dowager Duchess frowned at Charlotte's left hand. "I see my grandson has not even managed to arrange an engagement ring for you. It is lucky for him you are so patient."

"It is being resized." Charlotte's chest twisted at the thought of the ring. I doubt I shall ever see it.

She tried to remind herself that she had not liked the ring they had chosen anyway but could not help the pain that laced through her.

"Well, that is a relief." The Dowager Duchess pursed her lips thoughtfully and added, "Though it has been rather a long time. Perhaps you should follow up with Mr. Mosely."

"I am not sure I will have time to do so before we leave." Charlotte could not bear the thought of returning to the jeweller's.

"Ah, yes of course. I should have thought. No matter, I shall have Dominic do it." Dominic's grandmother nodded to herself, clearly indicating that the matter was settled.

Charlotte felt a stab of panic and said, "I am sure he already has the matter well in hand."

"If he did, the ring would be upon your finger, Lady Charlotte." The woman gently clasped one of Charlotte's hands in her own, her grip surprisingly firm but not unkind. "I know engagement rings are not terribly common, but in this family, they are rather important."

"Why?" Charlotte asked before she could stop herself, her cheeks flushing in embarrassment. "Sorry, that was rude of me. I should not have asked."

"Nonsense. It is a perfectly reasonable question, and I doubt many of the family actually know the reason." The Dowager Duchess gave her a conspiratorial look.

"Then you will share it with me?" Charlotte raised an eyebrow at her.

"I will." The woman nodded and paused before saying. "It is to do with choice."

"Choice?" Charlotte struggled to keep the surprise from her voice.

"Yes. My second husband gave me an engagement ring, and when I asked why, he said he wanted the world to know that we had chosen each other. Everyone should know the depth of our love, and the ring would be a public proclamation of that."

"Do you still wear it?"

"I do. Though I do not wear it upon my left finger —that ring is from my last husband. I wear the other on this chain. The late Duke was very patient, but he drew the line at me wearing another man's engagement ring."

"I suppose that makes sense."

"It does indeed. I would not like to be reminded of a lover's past relationships, would you?"

"Not really, no."

"Exactly."

"So you passed the tradition to your family?"

"I did. I wanted my children and their children to know the same happiness and love I did. I wanted them to be unafraid to pronounce their love to the world, to tell everyone that they had chosen this person and in turn been chosen."

"You are quite the romantic."

"Romance is by far the most enjoyable form of entertainment." She smiled but then shook her head. "Ah, look at the time. I have kept you too long with my silly nattering."

"Not at all, I have rather enjoyed the time with you, Your Grace."

"As have I, Lady Charlotte."

"Goodbye. It really has been a pleasure."

"You need not sound so final; we shall see each other again."

"Oh?"

"At your wedding, of course! I am really rather looking forward to it."

"Oh, yes. Of course. I shall take my leave of you. Good day."

Charlotte swept from the room before the tears began to flood down her cheeks. She practically ran to the front door, praying that the carriage would be ready and waiting. To her immense relief it was.

She hurled herself in, her stepmother close behind her. As the door shut, and they pulled away from the estate, Charlotte began to sob.