CHAPTER THIRTY

CHAPTER THIRTY

The humming intensified as instinct warned me this wasn't Attes either. I spun toward the younglings. "Stay here."

"A Primal is here." Reaver halted in the process of lifting Jadis. She giggled as her feet dangled above the floor. "And you're worried."

Damn that notam .

I crossed the distance between us and knelt. "I am, and that's why I need you to stay here with Jadis."

His stubborn gaze met mine as he set Jadis aside. "But you are meyaah Liessa —"

Jadis had stopped laughing, having picked up on the swift changes in the chamber. She dropped her doll and pressed herself against Reaver, wrapping her arms around him. "Scary," she whispered, her eyes bigger and rounder than I'd ever seen them.

"It's okay," I assured her, placing a hand on each of their cheeks. "You don't need to be scared, sweetheart. Not when Reaver is with you. He will keep you safe." My gaze shifted to Reaver. "Right? Remember what I asked of you before?"

He glanced between us and nodded. "Always," he said. "I promised you."

"That's right." I kissed his forehead and then Jadis's.

Reaver folded an arm over Jadis's shoulders as I rose and turned. Forcing myself not to bolt from the chamber and scare Jadis further, I walked out of Ash's office.

Damn it. I shouldn't have been thinking about how calm things were. I'd jinxed myself.

I closed the doors behind me. "A Primal has arrived," I told Rhahar , who now stood with Kars. "And it's not Ash or Attes ."

Then I ran.

"Sera!" Rhahar exclaimed.

I didn't slow down as I raced down the corridor, picking up speed as I reached the closest exit. Kars' curse got lost in the pounding of my heart. I willed the door open, catching it before it crashed against the shadowstone wall.

I spotted Aios in the courtyard, speaking with Bele. Her buttercream-colored gown fluttered around her slippered feet as she turned toward me, just as Bele's eyes flashed an intense silver.

"Fuck," Bele spat, her hand going to the sheath on her forearm. "I feel them."

It occurred to me then that I'd picked up on the Primal's arrival before any of them had, just as I had felt Kyn's presence before even his brother did, but there was no time to boast. " Aios ," I said, slowing. "Make sure Reaver and Jadis remain inside. They are in the office."

Aios nodded, grabbed fistfuls of her skirt, and without hesitation, took off in the direction I'd come from just as a horn blew at the entrance of the Rise, snapping my head around. My hands fisted. The Primal was at the gates. I started for them but stopped as Kars and Rhahar poured out the door.

"Do you know who it is?" Bele asked.

I shook my head. "I want to see them before they see me." I pivoted back to the side of the Rise that faced the Dying Woods. "Go to the gates and ensure that no one gets past them," I ordered.

A savage smile appeared as eather lit up the veins under her eyes. "You got it."

Bele was a blur of black and gray as I turned to Rhahar and Kars. "The same—"

" Nyktos is at the Pillars," Rhahar cut in. "He's bound to them until he finishes. That means we back you up whether you like it or not," Rhahar cut in. "That is our duty."

"Fine," I bit out. "Stay below and behind the Rise, at least."

I didn't wait for their answer, knowing they would obey. Quickly climbing the steep staircase, I reached the top and started running again, heading for the gates. The hair Ash had braided this morning thumped off my back as I rounded the corner of the Rise, Rhahar and Kars keeping pace with me on the ground below. I spotted archers already in their nests, shadowstone -tipped arrowheads pointed down.

Fuck.

Whoever had arrived was definitely not someone like Keella .

Gods, if it was Kyn returning for his payment again…

It would be bad.

Because while Ash had been able to stop himself yesterday, I wasn't sure I could.

The front of the courtyard came into view as the area between my shoulder blades twinged. Several guards stood at the ready at the closed gates, their swords glinting in the sunlight. Bele was with them. My gaze flicked up as an auburn-haired god ascended the steep stairs.

Rhain didn't look in my direction as he walked toward the lower wall above the gate, but he lifted a hand as if to warn me off. I slowed, hidden behind the narrow wall of the battlement. But if I felt this Primal?

They felt me.

Several guards bowed as I passed. I wanted to tell them to stop, but I kept my mouth shut for once.

Rhain moved to the battlement, where it curved out, and exposed himself from the waist up. He placed his hands on the ledge before him as the not-too-distant rumble of warning came from the sky. " Veses ."

I jerked to a stop so fast I nearly lost my balance, my body flashing cold and then hot— red-hot. Something was wrong with my ears because there was no way I had heard that name. There was no way she would come here.

I would've preferred fucking Kyn over her.

"I want to see Nyktos ."

At the sound of the sultry, raspy voice, whatever restraint I had snapped.

The world around me blurred in a haze of gold and silver as I headed down the Rise, moving so fast I ended up shadowstepping to the battlement.

Rhain staggered to the side in surprise. "Fates," he muttered.

The Primal Goddess of Rites and Prosperity came into view as I stalked to the ledge.

Veses stood below, her head tipped back, and her long, blond ringlets cascading down. The golden sunlight only heightened the beauty of her delicate features.

"You're not Nyktos ," Veses stated.

"No shit." I pressed my palms to the ledge, letting the warmth of the stone seep into me as I saw a deep shadow coasting through the scattered clouds above the road. It struck me then that Veses couldn't sense that Ash wasn't at the palace. My mind raced over the different times Ash had sensed another Primal's arrival. He knew the moment they entered the Shadowlands. Either that meant Ash was more powerful than Veses , even though she was significantly older, or my presence somehow blocked that. There was no time to allow for my intuition to kick in as I stared down at the Primal goddess. "You must be out of your mind to come here, Veses ."

Her full lips, painted to match her crimson gown, thinned.

"What?" I challenged. "No bitchy retort?"

"Sera," Rhain warned under his breath. Then he spoke louder to Veses . "What do you want?"

"I already told you." Her chin lifted a notch, and my muscles tensed. "I am here for Nyktos ."

Hearing her say that twice? When all I saw was her in Ash's lap, feeding from him? Using him? Fury seized control. I shifted my weight forward and drew my legs up. Rhain cursed, and I felt his fingers graze my arm, but I was so very fast now.

I launched myself off the battlement of the Rise. Cool air reached me, catching the sleeves of my blouse in a rush. There were only a few heartbeats of weightlessness as the hard ground raced up to greet me.

Instinct took over. My body relaxed, even as my knees bent. I landed with my feet shoulder-width apart, sinking into a crouch as the jarring impact traveled up my spine. Air punched out of my lungs. Dull pain flared in my hips but quickly faded. My gaze locked with Veses ' as I straightened.

Her eyes widened for a fraction of a second, then her expression smoothed out into bland indifference. "Impressive," she purred.

I smirked. "I know."

A large shadow broke free of the rapidly gathering clouds, its widespread wings casting a foreboding silhouette over the road leading to the Rise.

Several guards scattered as the onyx-hued draken landed beside me, Ehthawn's sword-sharp talons digging into the newly grown grass beside the road. His long, sinuous tail coiled, whipping across dirt and stone as he stretched his thick neck past me. His horned head was only a few feet from Veses as he let out a body-shaking roar, exposing large, bone-crunching teeth. Sparks of silver fire danced in the space between him and the Primal goddess.

Her chest rose sharply, straining the thin material of her gown as the glow of eather pulsed behind her pupils.

"You're not welcome here," I told her.

Her gaze lowered, tracking over the vest and pants I wore. One side of her lip curled in distaste. " Nyktos has welcomed me here many, many times in the past."

I took a step forward, smiling as she retreated. "The keywords there are in the past ."

She huffed. "That could change, especially when Nyktos grows tired—"

"That won't happen," I cut her off. "I know that seems foreign to you since you have no idea what it feels like to have someone love you."

Her lips thinned, and the eather pulsed brightly, proving I'd struck a nerve with my admittedly nasty barb.

But fuck her.

For real.

"You know what I know?" Veses ' expression smoothed out.

"Can't wait to hear it."

She smiled. "I know how fickle the heart is."

"That should tell you something, shouldn't it? That a fickle heart is what you know?" I sighed. "Gods, I do feel sorry for you, Veses ."

She flinched as if I'd slapped her. "You're a fool if you do. There is no reason—"

"There are several reasons to feel empathy for you, Veses ." I eyed the Primal goddess, remembering our conversation after I'd intervened on her behalf in Dalos . "And you know each one of them."

Some of the color drained from her face.

"But let me make one thing clear. Even though I feel sorry for you, I still want to kill you, and you know exactly why."

The skin above her eyebrow twitched as her eyes rose to mine.

"And you also know I'm fully capable of doing so," I tacked on as the gates opened behind me. "I'm the Queen, Veses . No one would stop me, yet you came here to speak to my husband . So, who is the fool?"

She stiffened. "You are no Queen."

"I'm the true Primal of Life." The essence rippled through me as Ehthawn reared his head back. Silver embers fell to the stone. "Look around you. How can you deny that?"

Her gaze darted left and right, passing over the land now ripe with life. "You redecorated. How lovely. It means nothing."

"It means everything," I said. "Your failure to accept that, just like your failure to realize that Kolis is a piece of shit who, just like Nyktos , doesn't want you, doesn't change the reality."

Her pretty face twisted into a sneer. "Then why don't you kill me, Seraphena ?"

"I'm trying to be a better person." My hands curled into fists.

"Better than who?" Her finely arched brows rose. " Nyktos ? I saw what he did to Kyn."

"How—? You know, I don't even care."

"He needed blood," she answered anyway. "After what was done to him."

"You fed him after what he did to you?"

She shot forward as quick as a pit viper. "I told you before, I like—" Her hair blew away from her face as she skidded back several feet. " Bitch ."

"I remember what you said. You liked it." I lowered my hand and stared at her. I would never understand her. Ever. "And to answer your question? No, I'm not better than Nyktos . He held back."

Her hair fell back over her shoulders in perfect ringlets. Another reason to hate her. "You think you're better than me," she spat.

"I don't have to try to be better than you."

"Cute." Her nostrils flared. "Especially when you have no idea."

"About what? You? I know everything I need to know."

"You don't know shit, Consort ."

Rhain shot forward. "She is no Consort." His voice vibrated with anger. "She is the Queen."

Veses laughed, the sound like wind chimes. "I recognize no such title or crown."

Rhain stiffened. "That would be considered—"

"It's okay." Lifting a hand, I stopped Rhain. "At the end of the day, her acknowledgment means nothing to me." I lowered my arm, refocusing on Veses .

"Is that so?" Her head moved in a serpentine manner. "When you call yourself Queen and refuse to acknowledge the King?"

My eyes narrowed. Clearly, someone had been talking to Kolis or Callum. "Because I am Queen, and Kolis is no King." Violent energy ramped up. Clouds gathered above us, thickening and dimming the sunlight. "Are you here on his behalf, acting as his little lapdog? Eager to please him despite his abuse?"

Her cheeks flushed pink as the sound of footsteps closed in behind me. "No, I'm not here on his behalf. But speaking of the King," she said, "I'm sure he would reward me greatly if I brought you back to him as a gift."

The air charged around me. "I would love to see you try."

Her gaze flicked behind me, and then her voice lowered. I could feel her…essence and the anger feeding it. "After Kolis is done with you," she said, "Kyn has big plans for you."

In an instant, all I could see was silver-laced gold.

"Fucking Fates," Bele hissed from behind me. "Do you want to die?"

"I'm not talking to you," Veses snapped.

"Exactly," replied Bele.

Veses rolled her eyes before refocusing on me. "I was right, you know. About you. I knew you weren't her." Her lips spread into a cruel smile. "Let's not forget what Kolis promised if you turned out not to be Sotoria ."

My fingers straightened as Ehthawn growled.

"By the way, does Nyktos know how that one was freed?" she asked, nodding at where Rhain had come to stand a few feet behind me. "Have you told him how far you were willing to go to convince Kolis that you were Sotoria ?"

My heart stopped, barely aware of the curse echoing from Rhain.

"I heard all about that." She tsked under her breath as she stepped forward. "So don't pretend you're better than me. You're nothing more than a caged whore."

A storm built inside me as the wind picked up around us, playing with her ringlets. It wasn't even the whore part that caused my skin to feel as if it were suddenly too tight. It was the caged part. Because, in my mind, I saw bars made of the gilded bones of the Ancients, and my heart lurched, then sped up. My fingers curled, pressing into my palms. Eather hummed in my ears, and my throat shrank—

The clean whisper of shadowstone swords being drawn pulled me from my thoughts. Time slowed. Or maybe my thoughts raced too fast as the scene taking place around me became clear. Swords were being drawn in the courtyard below and before the Rise. Bowstrings were pulled taut, and the crushing feeling of suffocation shifted deep inside me, coming from the same area in my chest that had cracked open the night I'd attempted to flee the Shadowlands. What seeped out was hot, endless fury.

I caught the slight twitch of the muscle above her right eye as dark, ominous clouds gathered overhead. I saw the unconscious flinch as the air around me charged, filling with the luminous, silver-tinged gold light. And I…

Gods, I wanted to lash out. To make her eat her words. To level her.

"Now," she continued smugly, her chin rising once more, "I've come to speak to Nyktos and hopefully talk some sense into him. Because despite your failure to realize how this will end for you, it doesn't change reality."

Eather throbbed beneath my skin as Ehthawn's spiked tail thumped off the road.

"And in case you don't know how this will end, let me break it down for you," she said, her voice dripping with false sweetness. "It ends with you on your knees and every hole being used to serve every god, draken , and dakkai ." Veses winked, and I heard a swift inhale behind me. "Maybe you'll like it."

I laughed, and the sound reminded me of a summer storm. "You silly bitch."

Her brows shot up. "Excuse me?"

I shot forward. Veses threw out her hand as silvery streaks of eather poured into her veins, but I was the true Primal of Life, and I knew how to fight dirty .

Catching her arm, I grabbed a fistful of those blond ringlets and yanked her head down as I raised my leg. My knee connected with her face, and the sound of bone crunching sent a surge of satisfaction through me. She yelped, the shock of pain causing her to lose her hold on the essence.

I jerked her head back. Shimmery bluish-red blood gushed from her now-crooked nose. "I think you forgot something." I jerked her head back until we were at eye level. "I'm no longer caged."

Her eyes flashed pure silver a heartbeat before I twisted, lifting her by the hair. I spun and threw her. She screamed, hitting the stone of the road and rolling in a tangle of red and long limbs.

Blond strands dangled from my fingers, burning away as eather crackled over my hand.

"Ouch." Bele laughed.

I stalked toward Veses as she rose onto her hands and knees, tendrils of eather dripping from my fingertips. I drove my booted foot into her side, knocking her down. I grabbed her hair again, flipping her onto her back as I moved to stand over her. She grunted as I knelt, digging my knee into her chest.

"I could forgive you for your poor choices in men, your pathetic insults, and even for loving someone as hideous as Kolis." Currents of raw, powerful energy built inside me, fueled by rage. It was the kind of power designed to create life, but that was not what I intended to use it for. I inhaled her rose scent as I lowered my head to her blood-streaked face. "But I can never forgive you for how you hurt Reaver, and I will never forgive you for what you did to Nyktos ."

Her all-silver eyes widened as I felt her essence. This time, it wasn't anger that threaded through the eather in her. It was fear.

"Tell me." My voice was a scorching whisper. "Tell me what you see in my eyes, Veses . It's not life, is it? It's death." The essence swelled inside me as I swung my right hand down—

"Sera." Rhain caught my arm, and my head jerked toward him. The glow of gold-and-silver eather danced over his angular cheeks. "Don't kill her."

Veses swung her arm, eather spitting from her fingertips. The heat of the energy stung my cheek as I caught her wrist an inch from my face. I twisted until I heard bone break.

"Bitch," she gasped.

"And exactly why should I not kill her?" I asked Rhain.

Rhain still held on to my arm. "You know why."

Fury dug its claws into me as I met his stare. "And you know why she deserves nothing less than death," I hissed, my voice low.

"You're right," he said. "She deserves nothing but death."

"Then don't stop—"

You won't do it.

My gaze flew back to Veses '. That voice… She hadn't spoken out loud. It had been inside my head.

Not because you're better than me or Kolis . Veses ' lips curved into a bloody smile. It's because you're weak. So godsdamn weak. That's why you're not any better. Claiming to be so is nothing more than an act.

I sucked in an unsteady breath as I was thrust back to when I was caged, and Veses had been on the outside. When she said we weren't that different.

And she had been right.

We both reacted violently when it came to the ones we loved. It was the monstrous part of us both. And she was right about me not being a better person.

But she was wrong about why.

"I know what she's doing. She's in your head. Don't listen to her." Rhain's grip on my arm firmed as he knelt beside me. "You don't want war, Sera, but if you kill her, that's exactly what you will start."

It would absolutely start a war. What had I said to Ash? I didn't want us to be the ones who started the war. But as the anger pumped hotly through me, I couldn't give two shits about what I'd said. The hairs all over my body rose as a strange, shivery heat ran down my spine and arms, shocking my fingers.

Veses winced.

And I smiled, wanting to strip the flesh from her bones and then break every one . Slowly. I wanted to kill her over and over. My hold on her shattered wrist tightened as my fingers—my nails —cut into her skin, drawing blood.

Is vengeance worth the price?

I stiffened, feeling another draken's echo or imprint. It was…earthy. Wild. In the back of my mind, I knew the sensation was unique to only one draken , but it was Rhain's voice that intruded, mingling with my thoughts. I stared down at Veses , the rose-scented breeze tossing wisps of my hair across my face.

Was vengeance worth the price?

Yes.

Yes, it was.

"It's more than vengeance," I said. "It's justice."

"The difference between the two is a fine line." Another voice, a deeper, gravelly one, reached me.

My gaze shot up as Nektas crossed onto the road, the ridges on his shoulders fading as loose pants manifested.

Wind whipped his hair as he knelt behind the Primal goddess's head. "And no one walks it without stepping over that line."

No one? Nektas was wrong. Ash would walk that fine line. He'd done so with Kyn. He always had. It was me who couldn't.

The true Primal of Life.

The Queen.

"Ash sent me," Nektas said, his voice gentling as Rhain released my arm. "He was worried."

It took a moment for what he said to break through. Ash must've picked up on my emotions while at the Pillars. A shudder went through me.

"How sweet," rasped Veses .

My lips peeled back, and a sound I didn't recognize came from deep within me. Before I knew what I was doing, my head snapped down, fangs bared. I tore into Veses ' throat, and there was nothing clean or quick about the bite. I wanted to cause pain.

And I did.

Veses screamed, her back arching as thick blood poured into my mouth and down my throat. Her blood was sweet—too sweet—and tasted of roses.

Tearing through the delicate flesh of her throat, I reared back and then spat a mouthful of blood in Veses ' face.

Bele laughed.

Veses fell back against the stone, panting.

I forced myself to lift my fingers from her wrist, catching a glimpse of the deep, crescent-shaped slices in her skin that my nails had left behind. Then I made myself stand and back away from her as the strange tingling sensation faded from my skin.

I dragged the back of my hand across my mouth, wiping away the blood as Rhain and Nektas rose. "Get up and get the fuck out of here," I bit out. "And do not ever come back looking for Nyktos . If you do, I will prove you right."

Breathing heavily, she sat up. Bloodstained curls fell across her chest as she looked at me.

"That this is an act," I said and felt Nektas's questioning stare on me.

The Primal stood with far more grace than I would've thought capable, especially with her throat torn open and her right hand hanging askew from her broken wrist. Her damn nose had already healed, though.

Veses turned and then stopped.

"Whatever you're thinking about saying or doing," Nektas drawled as Ehthawn rose behind him, "I would strongly advise against doing so."

Veses ' back stiffened, but she faced me, her blood-smeared lips pressed into a thin line. "Kolis offered you a deal," she said, her voice hoarse. "That's why I came here. To get Nyktos to convince you to take the deal offered to you."

"And you thought you could accomplish that?" I stated, not having the mental capacity to wonder if what she said was true.

A subtle flicker of emotion skittered across her face, and a slight tremor hit her hands before she straightened the fingers on her uninjured side. "If you don't accept the deal, you will regret not doing so."

Rhain cursed.

A rush of heat traveled up my spine as my eyes locked with hers. "Is that a threat?"

"No," Veses answered as mist rose, swirling around her legs. "It's only the truth."

"Can I talk to you?" Rhain asked as I stalked toward one of the side doors.

Taking a deep breath, I stopped and nodded. It was probably a blessing that Rhain was delaying my return to the younglings. With or without the notam , I didn't need to be anywhere near them in my current mood…or with Veses ' blood smeared across my chin.

Yuck.

"Can you give us a moment?" Rhain asked Rhahar , who had been trailing behind us.

I stiffened, knowing what was coming as Rhahar gave a way-too-elaborate bow before backing off. "I know I didn't control my temper out there. You don't have to tell me."

"That's not what I was going to bring up," he said, much to my surprise. "I…I just wanted to let you know that nothing has changed." His gaze briefly met mine. "I haven't told anyone what you did for me, and I won't."

I took a step back without realizing it. Denials rose to the tip of my tongue and spilled over. "There's nothing you could really tell them. You were unconscious—"

"I know you made a deal with Kolis," Rhain interrupted, his voice low. "I don't need to know the specifics of what that deal entailed to understand ."

My skin flashed hot with prickly, stinging heat. Pressure clamped down on my chest.

Rhain stepped in closer. "Have you told Nyktos ?"

The tightness moved to my throat.

Rhain took my silence as an answer. "That's what I thought." He looked across the courtyard, and then his gaze returned to mine. "I know you're not asking for my advice, and I also know it isn't my place to say shit, but those details won't stay between you and Kolis." His voice dropped even lower. "Kyn was still there, wasn't he? He knows, and he clearly told Veses ."

The ground felt like it shifted beneath me. "It doesn't matter. I know you don't believe me, but nothing happened."

"Sera—"

"It's the truth."

" Diaval knows." Eather pulsed through his dark golden-brown eyes. "The damn draken overheard everything. I know what Kolis asked for in exchange for my freedom."

Tonight, we'll share the same bed.

I couldn't feel my feet. "Nothing happened," I insisted. "Kolis only wanted to sleep in the same bed. He didn't try anything." The essence sparked within me, and I had to count to five to quell it. "It was nothing, and that is the truth."

"I…" Rhain swallowed and looked away. "It doesn't matter if that is the truth when it's not what others believe. Maybe that is wrong of me to say, but it's reality. And maybe what I'm about to say is also wrong." His eyes met mine. "Talk to Nyktos . Tell him before someone takes what should be your words to share and weaponizes them."