CHAPTER SIXTEEN

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

I forced myself to finish the buttery scrambled eggs while Ash wrote in the Book of the Dead.

I had no appetite.

Which was weird because I was always hungry. But there was this strange, metallic, almost sour taste in my mouth.

I picked up the glass of juice as I peeked over at Ash's bowed head. He hadn't spoken much this morning, not even to ask me where I had disappeared to when I went out onto the Rise. I assumed his trip to Vathi consumed his thoughts. He'd be leaving soon, and when he got back, we planned to go to the Thyia Plains to speak with Keella . His quietness wasn't because of the night terror that had awakened us both in the middle of the night.

I hated that the nightmare had come after such a wonderful day. It felt as if it had tainted yesterday's success. And I hated myself even more for feeling as if the reception of our public address was somehow lessened because of it.

I shoved another forkful of eggs into my mouth and chewed as I scanned his office. Being back here was strange when I hadn't thought I would ever see the space again. It had changed. Though not a lot. There were two chairs in front of his desk, where only one had been before. An end table made of the same dark wood with hints of red as his desk had been placed to my right.

I glanced at Ash. Plans for additional insulas that Rhain had dropped off a little bit ago lay on the corner of the desktop.

Swallowing a sigh, I shifted my attention to the table before me. Beside my plate were two and a half glasses, strawberries, a cutting board, and a knife.

It was a very odd combination of things.

Ash had put the ledgers there, instructing me to move them around, open them, and turn pages without touching or tearing them. It was I who had brought in the other items. And the other half of one of the glasses was in pieces in the trash bin.

I had no idea why moving a glass without breaking it was so hard when I had harnessed the eather to free myself and Ash before I Ascended and could use it to restore life to an entire Court.

According to Ash, it was because I was thinking about it too much when it didn't come to, well, situations where I wasn't angry or excited about something. I was complicating it and not letting it come naturally.

"Your thought is your will ," he'd said.

And that was about as helpful as my no-shit response.

" Liessa ?"

"Hmm?"

"If you keep chewing on your fingers, you won't have any left."

I dropped my hand to my lap. "I'm not chewing on my fingers."

"Little liar," he murmured.

My eyes narrowed. He had his head bowed and tipped slightly to the side as he wrote in the Book of the Dead. "How would you even know? You're not even looking at me."

Ash lowered the quill and lifted his gaze. Wisps of eather spun in eyes that had become heated quicksilver. "I'm always looking at you, liessa ."

A flush hit my skin as I returned my attention to my lessons. Summoning the eather as I stared at the knife, I willed it to lift—

The knife flew into the air, and I swallowed a shout.

Concentration broken, the knife plummeted back down. I leaned forward, catching it before the blade stabbed the innocent table.

I peeked over at Ash. His brow was furrowed, and I was sure I was being a distraction. My attention returned to the table. I'd really wanted the flavored water and had only managed to slice—or smash—two strawberries, so I quickly chopped one up and tossed it into the pitcher with my hands. Otherwise, I wouldn't have it until next year.

Placing the knife back down, I started to will it back into the air.

" Liessa ?"

"Yes?"

"I'm curious," he said, the quill moving quickly over the page. "Why have you moved on from slaughtering innocent glasses to throwing sharp instruments?"

My lips pursed. "Maybe I thought I would be more comfortable working with a blade."

He smirked. "How's that idea working out for you?"

"Just perfect."

Ash chuckled as he closed the Book of the Dead. The quill vanished into thin air. "Perhaps you should stick to the ledgers and soft, non-pointy items."

"Perhaps you should mind your business."

"I would,"—he picked up one of the building plans—"except I am worried that this may end with you having to regrow an eye." He paused. "Or we'll end up without glasses to drink from."

I sighed. "Like I said before, maybe I'm faulty."

"You know, the more I think about it, the more I realize you might have a point."

My eyes narrowed as I pictured the knife flying through the parchment he held.

Ash's hand snapped up, catching the knife by the hilt right before it pierced the cream parchment. He slowly turned his head to me. "I assume you meant to do that."

I smiled broadly. "I did."

"Then what was different this time?" he asked.

"You annoyed me."

"Other than that."

I lifted a shoulder. "I wasn't…"

"Overthinking it?"

"Shut up," I muttered.

He grinned and placed the knife on the table. "I will, but that doesn't change the fact that you're overthinking."

He was right.

Whatever.

"Can I have my knife back?"

"I'm not sure you will behave yourself with it," he replied.

My lips parted.

Ash smiled as he turned his attention back to the plans.

I returned to moving the glasses around for a few more minutes, spilling some water and stopping one from flying off the table.

"Can I have the knife back now?" I asked.

"Nope."

I lifted my hand, and the blade flew off his desk, handle first. I easily caught it.

"Let me guess," he said. "You weren't—"

"If you say overthinking it one more time," I warned, pointing the blade at him.

Ash just grinned, and honestly, why wouldn't he? I was threatening him with a paltry paring knife.

I sighed. "I miss my dagger."

In the next several minutes, I finally stopped overthinking things. I managed to lift several strawberries and plop them into the glass of water before my attention shifted to the bare shelves as I wondered what could be placed on them. Ash wasn't the type to be into glass figurines as my stepfather had been. "You need knickknacks."

Ash half-laughed. "What?"

"Knickknacks," I repeated. "You know, small objects that are worthless to some but are something you enjoy."

"I know what knickknacks are, liessa ." He looked up from the building plans. "What I don't know is why you're suggesting them."

"Your shelves are bare." I pointed at the walls. "My stepfather collected things made of spun glass. Or is it blown glass?" My nose scrunched. "Maybe they're the same thing."

"I don't believe so." Ash paused, looking to the side at the walls. "I never really thought about the shelves."

"I can tell," I replied dryly, taking a drink of the now-fruit-flavored water. "We'll have to get you some knickknacks."

"I'll add that to the list of things we must accomplish."

I looked at him with a frown. "We have a list?"

"We do." Rising, he set aside the building plans and returned the Book of the Dead to its drawer. "Speak with Attes . Summon the Primals . Plant more crops. Deal with Kolis. Spit on his close-to-dead-as-possible body." He ticked each item off as he walked around the desk, my brow rising with each item. "Rule the realms."

"That's an…impressive list," I slowly stated.

"I wasn't done."

"Oh."

"We also have to decide where we wish to live—here or in Dalos ," he continued. I blinked, not having even considered a relocation. "Indulge in radek wine—"

"The kind that makes…"

"One incredibly aroused for extended periods of time?" A wolfish grin appeared. "Yes."

"Oh," I repeated. "I think I would like that."

Icy heat swirled in his eyes as he sat beside me on the light gray settee. "You will love it, liessa ."

My gaze swept over his powerful body. I would be obsessed with that.

He glanced at the table that had been brought in for our breakfast. The heat faded from his stare. "Fates," he muttered, dragging a hand over his jaw.

"What?"

"What you're drinking," he said. "Or what you've made yourself. I completely forgot about this until now, but…"

"Your father used to do this," I finished for him.

His head cut to me. "How did you—?" He let out a soft laugh. "Foresight?"

It wasn't the vadentia but Kolis who had told me, but I smiled and nodded as I quickly looked away. I could feel his stare on me.

"It wasn't the vadentia , was it? It was Kolis." A moment passed. "Why wouldn't you just tell me that?"

I blew out a breath as I lifted a shoulder. "I just don't think it matters, and I don't want him to be associated with you remembering something about your father."

"It's kind of hard for him not to be associated with thoughts of my father, liessa ." He reached over and tucked a curl back from my face. "But I do appreciate the consideration."

I relaxed. "It's pretty tasty. You should try it."

"I will." His attention shifted back to the table. "Are you finished eating?"

"Yep."

His brows furrowed. "You barely ate."

"Not true." I took another drink.

"You only ate half the eggs. Maybe a bite of the muffin." He picked up the napkin I'd tossed over a side dish, revealing the strips of fried meat. "And you didn't even touch the bacon."

I lifted a shoulder. "I guess I'm not that hungry."

"That's odd." Ash's frown deepened.

"What? Not being hungry?"

"Yeah." He leaned back and looked at me. "After an Ascension, one is typically hungrier than normal because the body is still going through changes. A lot of energy is expended."

"Oh," I said, cradling the glass to my chest. "Maybe I'm different because I was mortal."

"Maybe." His gaze tracked over my features. "When Kolis had you, was food restricted?"

I jerked, caught off guard by his question. "No. Food was provided. A lot of it." My hold on the glass tightened. "You think me not being hungry has to do with my time in Dalos ?"

"Kolis has been known to use food as a form of reward and punishment," he said, and my stomach dropped. "I didn't know if that was the case with you."

"No. It wasn't." My gaze shifted to the plates. "I was…treated more like a guest than a prisoner."

Cold air blasted off Ash. "A guest kept in a cage?"

"A reluctant guest," I amended, feeling my chest knot. "But you don't have to worry about that. Kolis didn't do anything like that." A moment passed, then another. No longer thirsty, I placed the glass on the table. "Did he use food in that way with you?"

"He did."

I briefly closed my eyes as fury rose, stoking the embers. I had to take a deep breath. "I hate him," I said, folding my hand over his. "I really—wait." I looked down at our joined hands, realizing just then that his skin didn't feel as cold as it had the night before. Or this morning, when we woke, even. "Your skin is a little warmer."

He reached over and picked up the glass with his other hand. "Feels the same to me," he said, taking a sip. "It does taste good." He tipped the glass back, eyeing the contents. "Probably could get by with one or three less strawberries."

"I like it sweet," I murmured, sliding my hand up the corded muscle of his forearm. Maybe it was my imagination? It must have been because Ash hadn't fed since I'd awakened from stasis.

"While I don't mind that you're feeling up my arm," he drawled, "if you continue, I'm afraid I'll never make it to Vathi."

I pulled my hand away and cleared my throat. "I wish I could go with you."

"I wish you would talk to me."

My head cut to his. "About what?"

"That's another long list," he stated. "But we can start with what you were dreaming about last night."

A thin breath of air made it past my lips. "I already told you. I don't remember. So, you can go ahead and remove that from the list."

Tension bracketed his mouth as he looked away, and I knew that what I'd suspected last night was true.

He didn't believe me.

"Would you like me to remind you?" he said quietly.

I stared at him, my heart thumping as it began to race.

"You were screaming."

Shit.

A muscle flexed along his jaw. "You were screaming the word no ."

Shit .

I swallowed. "I don't know why."

His gaze flicked to mine. "I think I have a pretty good idea."

Muscles all throughout my body began to tense as if I was preparing to leap from the settee and run. It was like the flight response kicking in, but I could feel the fight instinct gearing up to take over, and I didn't want that. Ash wasn't at fault here. He was only concerned. So, I took a moment to calm my ass down.

"I know you're worried about me," I started, and Ash's gaze returned to mine, "but I'm okay."

Several moments passed, the silence stretching between us. "It's all right, you know?" he said. "To not be okay. To not always be strong."

A jolt ran through my body as my hands curled around nothing but air. " Nektas said something like that."

"I'm sure he did. He's said it to me before."

I dropped my hands to my lap. "Why…why was he telling you that?"

"My father. Not knowing my mother. Kolis. Veses ," he said, and my chest fisted with anger at merely the sound of her name. "I could keep going, but I think you get the point."

I did.

And I wished I didn't because it made my heart ache for everything he'd had to deal with.

That was why I wasn't going to tell him about the nightmare. He didn't need that living in the back of his head, haunting him, along with everything else.

"But you got through it because you had to, right?" I said. "And you were able to do that because you're strong. You're a survivor."

"So are you."

My brows snapped together. "I am, but that has nothing to do with survival."

"It has everything to do with surviving, liessa ."

I shook my head, my palms beginning to sweat. How did we even end up having this conversation when we had far more important things to discuss? "I get what you're saying. I do. But I am okay. I'm not—" A sudden charge of energy bore down on me, pimpling my skin. I stiffened.

A frown pulled at his brow. "Sera?"

"I…I feel something. I don't know how to explain it. It's like I can feel the air changing. As if…"

Ash's chin dipped, and a low growl rumbled from him. "Is it fucking Kolis again?"

"No." Ash rose as I stood. "But it feels like something is coming." Eather throbbed in my chest. "Something powerful and…"

Old.

Something Ancient .

Sucking in a sharp breath, I spun toward the doors. No sooner had the thought finished than the air between the two shadowstone pillars warped.

Ash curled his arm around my waist and hauled me back as a sphere of eather materialized, rapidly swelling and elongating as it unfurled. But this was no random ball of eather . Instinct told me it was a tear in the very realm itself. An opening.

A portal.

The first thing I saw was skin. A whole lot of bare flesh and honed muscle in the shape of a tall, broad man with shoulder-length brown hair and skin a shade somewhere between the bronze of Ash's and the copper of Nektas's . The man casually walked out of the portal like he was merely taking a stroll in a park.

That was if one walked in the park only wearing loose-fitting, white linen pants and absolutely nothing else.

Well, he was wearing something else. Small gold rings in both of his brown nipples. I supposed that counted as some sort of attire.

I really needed to stop looking at his nipples.

I lifted my gaze. Scrolling vines similar to what adorned the throne room doors were tattooed up the sides of his throat, stopping at the curve of a jaw that could've been carved from granite. Except I didn't think that design was made of ink. It was a shade or two darker than his flesh and appeared to churn from within his skin, like the shadows often did in Ash's. I looked past sculpted lips, a chiseled nose, and arched cheekbones, momentarily distracted by the asymmetric features. And then I saw his eyes.

My lips parted. They were a kaleidoscope of colors: a warm shade of brown, the dewy green of the newly grown patches of grass outside, and the blue of the Stroud Sea. Bursts of silver were sprinkled throughout the colors like stars.

I'd seen those eyes before.

During my Ascension, when I'd seen how the realms were created.

"What the fuck?" Ash snarled, his flesh thinning. Shadows appeared along his throat.

The being's strange eyes flicked to Ash, his head moving in a way that sent a chill of unease down my spine. There was something utterly inhuman in that simple movement. Almost as if the entire realm shifted around him to accommodate the gesture. One side of his lips curled up, and instinct warned me that smile was not a good thing.

"It's okay." I stepped around Ash—or tried to. He sidestepped me. "He's an…" I trailed off as the being's gaze shifted to me. He waited to hear what I said. What I would reveal. My throat dried. "He's a Fate—an Arae."

The other side of the Ancient's lips rose then in a close-lipped smile. It reminded me of Kolis's smiles—the ones that were practiced and shallow as if he didn't understand the emotions behind smiling and was simply copying others' expressions.

How could Holland be an Ancient? He was nothing like this being standing in front of us.

"I don't give a fuck what he is," Ash fumed, the shadows deepening as they spread up his throat in nearly the same pattern as the one on the Ancient's skin. "I only know he had better have one good fucking reason for arriving unannounced and uninvited in our home."

Our home.

It was just two words, but they suddenly made me feel all warm inside—

The Ancient laughed.

Okay. Now was not the time to focus on how those words made me feel all ooey-gooey. Like, at all. Because the Ancient's laugh was even more creepy than his smile.

Dark tendrils of eather gathered on the floor, wrapping themselves around our legs. "I'm not sure what you find funny."

"Many things," the Ancient replied, his voice carrying a lilt I'd never heard before, one with a melodic quality.

The power growing around Ash caused the air to crackle and stirred the eather inside me. "You want to key us in on those things?" Ash said.

"You want to tell me why you speak for the true Primal of Life?" the Ancient countered.

I stiffened. "He doesn't speak for me."

The Ancient's head moved again, tilting to the side as he focused on me. "I suppose I should be relieved to hear that." He paused, his gaze moving over me in a way that said he was sizing up my worth and wasn't exactly impressed with the end result. My eyes narrowed. "But that is yet to be seen."

Between the tone that dripped disapproval and that look, it was like the Ancient had reached inside me and shattered any self-restraint I'd developed after my Ascension.

Eather rushed to the surface of my skin and seeped through. "I was wrong," I said as, out of the corner of my eye, I thought I saw wisps of silver-laced golden eather streaking through the dark shadows whirling on the floor. "He did just speak for me when he said you'd better have a good fucking reason for appearing in our home as if you belong here."

The churning colors stilled, and the bursts of eather brightened in the Ancient's eyes.

"Careful," he replied softly. "You may harness the eather of the realms, but you are only a…" The stars in his eyes pulsed, and while his lips didn't move when he spoke, I heard him clear as day anyway. Two words.

Baby Primal.

I sucked in a sharp breath and jerked. The shock collapsed my hold on the essence.

"You're the one who needs to be careful." Ash's chin dipped. "You may be a Fate, but that won't stop me from flaying the flesh from your body if I even perceive your words to be a threat to my wife."

Yet again, I felt myself melting inside, and really, not the appropriate response for several reasons. But most importantly?

Ash was a badass. But he could not defeat an Ancient.

Likely, none of us could.

That tight-lipped smile returned, almost as if the Ancient had heard my thoughts. "I do have a reason for being here," he announced as a shimmer of awareness swept through me.

"I suppose I'm relieved to hear that," Ash mimicked with a smile just as unfriendly. "But that is yet to be seen."

"Charming," the Ancient murmured, and a not-too-distant rumble echoed from outside. He glanced at the ceiling, and I could've sworn I saw a flicker of something skittering across his features. Not an emotion per se, but something like…wariness.

I thought about the dragon I'd seen taking out an Ancient during my Ascension. "Whatever your reason is, you'd best get to it." My lips curled into a smirk. "Because I think we're about to have company."

The eather dimmed in his eyes. "I've come to retrieve the Primal of Life."

My heart lurched. "What for?"

"You've been summoned," the Ancient answered. "By the true Primal of Death."