33. Thirty-Two

I blinked my eyes open, squinting up at the glow-in-the-dark stars plastered across the ceiling, casting a faint green luminescence in the otherwise dark room. Dex's room. The velociraptor sheets were tangled around my legs and the scent of crayons lingered in the air.

I sat up slowly, rubbing my temples, trying to deduce how long Dex had been out. Probably not long. He didn’t like to stay fronting for long. Usually, he was only out a few hours before he wore himself out.

I rolled out of bed and went to read the house journal first. There was an entry from Azreal, as usual. Dex didn’t ever remember to leave notes, so Azreal did it for him.

Dex played dinosaurs, watched age-appropriate television and ate junk food.

Succinct and to the point, as always. I expected nothing less from Azreal.

Beneath that was an entry from Keres that boasted in graphic detail about his conquest from the night before. Breeding his bunny, he called it. I rolled my eyes heavenward, irritation prickling beneath my skin. Keres's vulgar terminology never ceased to grate on my nerves. He treated Eli like a hole to be bred rather than a cherished submissive.

With a weary sigh, I rose and made my way out to the main living area of my apartment. The open concept kitchen and living room were meticulously tidy, as I preferred, but there were dishes in the sink from the night before. The vacuum cleaner sat unused in the coat closet and the bucket and mop for washing the floors were nowhere to be seen.

Unease flickered in my gut as I strode down the hallway to Eli's room. I rapped my knuckles against the door. “Eli? Are you unwell?” No answer. I tried the knob and found it unlocked. Odd.

I pushed the door open, the hinges squeaking in protest. The room beyond was shrouded in darkness, the blackout curtains drawn tight against the morning sun. I fumbled for the light switch, blinking rapidly as the overhead fluorescents flickered to life, illuminating the space in harsh white light.

Eli's bed was empty, the charcoal gray comforter rumpled and unmade. His laptop sat open on the desk, the screen black. I crossed to it, tapping the spacebar. The login screen appeared, prompting for a password. No clues there.

Uncertainty coiled in my gut as I strode out of the room, checking the bathroom, the closets, even the crawl space that housed the water heater. All empty. No sign of Eli anywhere.

I returned to the living room, snatching my cell phone off the side table and pulling up Eli's contact. It rang once, twice, three times before going to voicemail. “Eli, it's me. Where are you? Call me back immediately.”

Trepidation morphing into dread, I crossed to the sliding glass door that led out to the small balcony. The morning air was crisp and cool against my skin as I gripped the wrought-iron railing, my knuckles turning white. I scanned the street below, my gaze darting from car to car, searching for any sign of Eli. The sidewalks were empty, save for a few early morning joggers and a woman walking her dog. No one even remotely resembling my wayward submissive.

With a muttered curse, I ducked back inside, sliding the door closed with more force than necessary. The glass rattled in its frame, but I paid it no mind. My heart was pounding in my chest, a sickening sense of dread rising like bile in the back of my throat. I could feel Keres pushing at the edges of my mind, his rage and possessiveness threatening to overwhelm me. I gritted my teeth, forcing him back. Now was not the time to lose control.

I snatched up my phone again, my fingers flying over the screen as I pulled up Eli's contact once more. I hit the call button, pressing the phone to my ear as I paced the length of the living room. One ring, two, three, four... Voicemail. Again. I ended the call with a frustrated growl, resisting the urge to hurl the phone across the room.

Think, damn it. Think. Where could he be? My mind raced with possibilities, each more dire than the last.

I dialed Gavin's number from memory. He picked up on the second ring, his voice crisp and professional as always. “Good morning, Shepherd. How may I assist you?”

“Gavin,” I said, my voice cracking on his name. I cleared my throat, trying to regain some semblance of composure. “Have you seen Eli?”

There was a brief pause on the other end of the line. “Not since yesterday. Is everything alright?”

“No,” I bit out, my free hand clenching into a fist at my side. “Everything is not alright. Eli is missing.”

Another pause, longer this time. When Gavin spoke again, there was a note of concern in his usually stoic tone. “Missing? Are you certain? Perhaps he merely stepped out for a moment...”

“He's not here, Gavin,” I snapped, my tenuous grip on my temper fraying. I could feel Keres pacing in the back of my mind like a caged beast, his fury a living, breathing thing. “His bed is empty. His phone goes straight to voicemail. He's gone. He’s left me.”

The words tasted bitter on my tongue, sharp and acrid like ashes. The thought of Eli leaving, of him abandoning me, abandoning us, was enough to steal the breath from my lungs. A wave of despair crashed over me, so strong it nearly brought me to my knees. I braced my hand against the wall, my head bowed as I fought to maintain my composure.

“Shepherd,” Gavin's voice was gentle, but firm. “Take a deep breath. I'm on my way, alright? Stay calm. We'll figure this out.”

I wanted to laugh at the absurdity of his words. Stay calm? How could I possibly stay calm when the man I loved, the man I had sworn to protect and cherish, had disappeared without a trace? But I forced myself to take a shuddering breath, then another, and another, until the black spots dancing at the edges of my vision began to recede.

“Hurry,” I managed to choke out before ending the call, letting the phone fall from my numb fingers to clatter against the hardwood floor.

The wait for Gavin's arrival was interminable. Each second felt like an eternity, stretching out before me in an endless expanse of uncertainty and dread. I paced the length of the apartment like a caged animal, my mind spinning with countless scenarios, each more terrible than the last.

What if Eli was hurt? What if he was lost, alone, and afraid? What if Algerone had made good on his threat to hurt Eli? What if he had left me? How was I ever supposed to recover from that?

The sharp rap of knuckles against the door jolted me from my spiraling thoughts. I lunged for the door, wrenching it open to find Gavin on the other side, his brow furrowed with concern.

“Shepherd,” he said, stepping inside and closing the door behind him with a soft click. His gaze swept over me, taking in my disheveled appearance and the manic gleam in my eyes. “What happened?”

I shook my head, resuming my agitated pacing. “I don't know. I woke up, and he was gone. No note, no explanation, nothing.” My voice cracked on the last word, betraying the depth of my despair.

Gavin's expression softened. He crossed the room in a few long strides, grasping my shoulders and forcing me to meet his gaze. “Shepherd, listen to me. We will find him. I promise you that. But first, I need you to tell me everything you know.”

I took a shuddering breath, trying to organize my jumbled thoughts. “I don’t know anything. Apparently Dex was out yesterday and Keres before that. The last thing I remember… We went out for dinner and then…” I gripped my head. Fuck, I couldn’t remember. Why couldn’t I remember?

I squeezed my eyes shut, my fingers digging into my scalp as I tried to force the memories to the surface. But they remained stubbornly out of reach, like wisps of smoke that dissipated the moment I tried to grasp them.

Gavin's grip on my shoulders tightened, grounding me in the present. “Shepherd, it's all right. Take your time. What do you remember about yesterday?”

I exhaled slowly, forcing my hands to unclench. I closed my eyes and reached deep down, brushing against the other parts of myself buried deep. I felt a small hand reach back, tiny fingers curling around mine. “I remember... Dex wanted to play with his dinosaurs. Eli was there, watching him. Smiling. He seemed... happy.” The word tasted bitter on my tongue, like ashes. Happy. How could Eli be happy when he was planning to leave me?

Gavin nodded, his expression thoughtful. “I saw them together, just before I left for the day. Eli was helping Dex set up his toys. They were laughing, joking around. It seemed... normal. Eli didn't say anything about leaving or being unhappy.”

I latched onto his words like a drowning man clutching a life preserver. “What else? Did you notice anything unusual? Anything at all?”

Gavin hesitated, his brow furrowing. “No, nothing that stands out. Eli seemed a bit tired, maybe. But that's not uncommon, given his schedule. I left around four o’clock. They had plans to watch another movie and then Dex was going to bed. Eli was supposed to call me if anything happened and I never got a call.”

I began to pace again, my mind racing.

I paced faster, my feet eating up the distance from one end of the room to the other in a matter of seconds. My mind spun with possibilities, each more dire than the last. What if Eli had been taken against his will? What if he was hurt, or worse? The thought made my stomach churn, a sickening sense of dread rising like bile in the back of my throat.

Gavin watched me with growing concern, his hands held out in a placating gesture. “Shepherd, you need to calm down. We'll figure this out, but you're no good to Eli if you let Keres take over.”

I whirled on him, a snarl twisting my lips. “Don't tell me to calm down! Eli is missing, Gavin. Missing! And I have no idea where he is or if he's even still alive!”

My voice cracked on the last word, betraying the depth of my fear. I could feel Keres pacing in the back of my mind, his rage a tangible thing, pressing against the inside of my skull like a physical force. It would be so easy to let him take control, to give in to the darkness and let it consume me. But I couldn't. Not yet. Not until I knew Eli was safe.

Gavin took a step closer, his voice low and soothing. “Shepherd, listen to me. We will find Eli. I swear it on my life. But you have to stay in control.”

The shrill ring of my cellphone pierced the air, jarring me from the dark spiral of my thoughts. I snatched it up, my heart leaping into my throat when I saw UNKNOWN flashing on the screen.

“Eli?” I answered, my voice rough with desperation.

“Shepherd, it’s me.”

“Dani?” My voice broke. I shook my head, fighting to keep it together.

“I can't talk long.” Dani's voice was hushed and hurried, like she was whispering into the receiver, glancing over her shoulder. “But I had to warn you. The cult... they took him. They have Eli.”

The phone nearly slipped from my hand, my fingers gone numb. The world tilted on its axis and all the air seemed to vanish from my lungs. An icy chill slithered down my spine as the sickening realization sank in, settling like lead in my stomach.

“What... Where are you?” I choked out, each word scraping like broken glass in my throat. “Tell me, Dani. Please.”

“I don't know all the details. I overheard Father Ezekiel talking to some of the elders. They were saying something about Eli being an abomination, living in sin with you. That he needed to be cleansed and purified. Brought back into the light.” Her voice trembled, thick with fear. “I think they're going to hurt him, Shepherd.”

A strangled noise tore from my throat, somewhere between a sob and a scream. “Dani, please,” I begged, my voice cracking. “You have to tell me where they took him. I can't... I can't lose him.”

There was a long pause, the silence broken only by the sound of Dani's shaky breathing. When she finally spoke, her words were barely above a whisper. “They're at the old campsite, the one outside Point Pleasant. You know the one.”

I did know.

I also knew the sort of awful rituals that took place there, and about all the bodies they’d buried out there. I couldn’t let Eli become another unmarked grave in the woods.

“Dani...” I started, but she cut me off.

“I have to go,” she said, her voice thick with tears. “I'm sorry, Shepherd. For everything. I…I love you, big brother. I hope you know that.”

“Wait, Dani, don't—”

But it was too late. The line went dead.