14. Midnight

Chapter 14

Midnight

E very seven years the cells in our bodies regenerate.

Daniel taught me that.

Old cells die and new ones are born. Our skin sheds. Our nails grow. Our hair falls out. Seven years. In seven years, a person transforms into something new.

Untainted. Unsullied.

Untouched.

Zoey has five years left.

Me? I have two.

I'd trade with Zoey if I could. She still smiles with her eyes. There's hope there. She might even defy science. In a year or two from now, she might be healed. She might even forget.

As feeble and emotionally drained as she looks sitting on my couch, Pinto's head on her lap, she still glows. There's light inside of her. It hasn’t completely vanished. It flickers at a dim setting. But it's there. Like the light of a new dawn. It's only a matter of time before the sun rises.

I don't glow.

No matter what science says.

"Here." I hand Zoey a cup of hot chocolate as I sit down beside her. I place my vodka on the coffee table. She looks at the glass. "Want a pour?"

"No." Zoey brings the mug to her lips. "I told you, I'm never drinking again."

"It wasn't alcohol's fault, Zoey." I ball up my fist. "It was his . And his alone."

"I know," she whispers, tone lacking conviction. Pinto stretches, hopping down off the couch and strutting toward the front door. "Hey, where you going, bean? I was warm.”

“I need to walk him." I check the time. It's late. Clear skies and empty streets. Ideal. "I'll be back soon, okay?"

"Can I go with you?"

"I want to be alone." I nod at the TV. "Watch a movie or something."

"Okay." Disappointment flashes across her face. "Don't be too long though."

"I'll be back before you know it." I grab Pinto's leash and clip it to his collar before grabbing a jacket from the closet. "You wanna go on a walk? Yeah?"

Pinto wags his tail as we enter the elevator. I smile at him, a wave of bittersweet sadness washing over me. Cells regenerate but we all still die. Some people are lucky and die from old age. They leave us naturally. Peacefully. Others are not so lucky. No. Others are taken from us. Ripped from the earth.

No goodbyes. No last words.

Nothing.

I lead Pinto out of my condo building and we make our way to his favorite dog park. Pinto walks beside me. No tugging. No pulling. He's a good boy. We trained him well. He wasn't always good. Pinto had to relearn a lot of things. He had to learn how to trust us. And we had to prove to him we wouldn't hurt him. We wouldn't hit him. We would only love him.

"Whoops, sorry," a passing jogger mumbles, accidentally bumping into my shoulder as he runs past us.

"It's fine," I say to myself as he's already gone. I sink down on one knee, setting Pinto free into the grass. "Stay close, got it?"

Pinto barks and lethargically sprints into the field. I pull out a pack of cigarettes and sit down on a bench. Street lights flicker above me as I light a smoke and watch my dog entertain himself. Another jogger runs past me, and I roll my eyes. God, people are insane, but at least they're running outside and not on a treadmill.

Hmm... I wonder if he's at the gym tonight. I pull out my cell phone and type out a text.

Camilla

You up?

I tap the screen, waiting for a reply. I grin when I get the notification.

The Doc

No.

I take a puff, crossing my legs.

Camilla

Come to the dog park. I need to talk.

The Doc

Why is it that you only need me after midnight?

I roll my eyes.

Camilla

I'm a night owl. So? You coming?

The Doc

Do I have a choice?

I smirk.

Camilla

I'll send you my location.

After I drop a pin for Hayden, I pocket my cell phone and close my eyes. The crisp night air nips at my cheeks, and I take a deep breath. The humming sounds of the city swirl in the wind.

New York City is never quiet and Manhattan never sleeps. It's alive. Always. Its heart is constantly beating. Full of life. Cities also have cells. Manhattan now is not Manhattan ten years ago. It's different. It's changed. Evolved into what it needed to become.

New York's an empire in itself.

But so was Rome.

And look what happened.

I snap my head to the ruffling of leaves. I squint into the distance as a silhouette emerges from the darkness .

"Sorry," Hayden says, his face illuminated by the soft yellow light. "Didn't mean to scare you."

"You didn't." I scoot over on the bench to make room for him. "I'm not scared of danger that lurks in shadows."

"No?" The city seems to lower its voice as he sits down beside me. "Why's that?"

"Because I know it's there." I shift my body toward him and bring my knee to my chest. I take in the charcoal beanie on his head. It's a look I haven't seen before. Casual. Almost cool. I meet his green eyes as I add, "Danger only comes with daylight."

Hayden frowns, rubbing his chin. "Is that why you're a night owl, Camilla? To avoid danger?"

I chuckle. "You can't avoid danger, Doc. It finds you one way or another."

"Is that why you wanted to talk?" Hayden stiffens, his expression hard and serious and borderline concerned. "Are you in danger?"

"I am the danger, Hayden," I smirk, tilting my head as my gaze flicks down to his plush lips. "Are you scared of me yet?"

"Not even a little." He clears his throat. I don't buy it. At all. "I mastered fear a long time ago."

"You can't master fear." A shiver courses down my spine as I close my eyes, remembering the morning Zoey came home crying. The morning that my transformation was complete. Please don't. Stop. I can't breathe. Don't kill. I'm sorry! Please! My eyelids spring open, and I look up at Hayden. "Unless you become it. "

"Where did you just go?" Gentle curiosity and concern lace his tone. "Talk to me, Camilla."

"A place of no return." I force a weak smile. "Some things are better left in the past, don't you think?"

"Not if they affect your present," he says. "Or worse, your future."

"It's not me who's affected," I say as Pinto runs toward me with a stick in his mouth. I sigh and stand up, taking the stick from him. Hayden follows me as I walk into the field and toss the stick. "It's my assistant."

"Your assistant?" He rubs his chin, watching Pinto slowly chase the stick and bring it back. "What happened to her?"

"She was at a frat party and someone roofied her," I say, forcing my gaze to remain elusive. It's easier this way. Like I'm talking to the wind. "You can put together the rest."

"I see..." He expels a charged breath as Pinto drops the stick at his feet. Hayden bends down, picks it up, and then whips it into the darkness. "Was he prosecuted for his crimes?"

"No." Resolve grips my heart, and I turn to face Hayden. "He disappeared before the court date."

He raises a brow. "Disappeared?"

"Mhmm," I hum, letting out a peaceful breath. "Vanished without a trace."

"Interesting," he muses. "Where do you think he went?"

"Somewhere hot I bet." I give him a knowing smile. "Maybe Mexico. "

"If he's in Mexico, you could extradite him if you found him," Hayden notes. "We've got a treaty."

"I don't think there's a treaty where he went." My breath hitches as my arm brushes against Hayden's. I look up at his mossy green eyes, and my stomach churns. They're almost the same shade as Daniel's. How have I not noticed before? "I think it was a one-way trip."

"I see." Hayden's chest rises ever so slightly, like an earthquake no one feels. No one but me. "Is your assistant okay?"

"She will be." The ground beneath my feet quivers as he takes a purposeful step closer to me. "She's strong. Stronger than she knows. There's nothing she can't do."

"She's lucky to have a friend like you," Hayden muses. "Someone who believes in her. That's important."

"I'm not her friend." I swallow. "I'm her boss ."

Hayden's lips twist up as if he's confused. "You speak about her like you're friends."

"I don't have friends, Doc." I bend down to grab the stick. I pet Pinto's head before tossing it into the air. "Friends are liabilities."

"Liabilities?" Hayden tilts his head. "Friends are essential, Camilla. It's imperative to have people in your life who love you. It's what makes life worth living."

"No." My jaw clenches as I glance over at Pinto, my heart sinking. "It's what makes life unbearable to live." Hayden's silent as I stare down the field. "You want to know what the real danger is?" I glance at him, and he nods tentatively, frowning. "It's love, Doc. It's the most dangerous type of evil."

Hayden doesn't say a word as he looks at me. Studies me. Like I'm a relic. Maybe he didn't hear me. Maybe I said it in my head. Maybe, for once, he has no rebuttal. No follow up. Perhaps he knows it's the truth. A painful fact. A certainty of life.

"Has love betrayed you before, Camilla?" Hayden finally asks in a soft tone, like he's worried I'll break down and cry. But I don't cry. He knows that I think.

"No," I whisper. "Love didn't betray me... I betrayed love."

My love.

"Maybe it's time to forgive yourself." He lifts up his hand as the wind blows my hair across my face. I gasp, frozen into submission as his fingers tenderly run along my cheek until his touch is gone. "We are only human."

"Sometimes I don't feel human." I breathe almost inaudibly. "I feel like a ghost."

He swallows, taking a step back. "I don't think you're a ghost, Miss Bianco."

"What am I then? Tell me."

"I need to get home," he says suddenly, checking his watch. "We'll continue this another time." He looks at Pinto. "He's fast for a fourteen-year-old."

I frown, unsure of what to make of his comment. "It varies day-to-day."

"Right..." He nods. "I'll see you later this week." Pausing, he adds, "In the daylight next time, okay? No more midnight."

And then he leaves back into the shadows from which he came.

"You're back!" Zoey exclaims, pausing her movie. She stands up and walks toward me, sniffing the air. "You smell weird."

"Weird?" I drop my keys on the console table. "Weird how?"

"Like cologne." She scrunches her nose, staring me down suspiciously. "Were you with a man?"

"I'm taking a shower." I roll my eyes, brushing past her. "Go to sleep, Zoe, it's late."

"Not before you tell me who you were with!" She follows me into the bathroom. "Come on, Cami! This is the second time you've gone AWOL at night. Someone's gotta know who you're with, and I'm guessing Frankie's in the dark..."

I groan, crossing my arms. "I was with Hayden, okay?"

Zoey frowns. "Hayden?"

I sigh. "Doctor Malcolm?"

"What?" Zoey blinks, taken aback. "The therapist from a few weeks ago? Really?" She pauses, studying me. " Why? "

"'Cause he's hot," I say pointedly, pushing her out of my bathroom. "Go finish your movie."

I shut the door and stare at myself in the mirror for several minutes.

Why?

"Because, Cami..." It's his voice. Daniel's voice. "Because it's always darkest before the dawn."

My cells.

They're regenerating.