35. Drew

Chapter thirty-five

Drew

I watch Adam out of the corner of my eye as we step out of the building. I know what he and Sam were doing in there. I heard it.

I could feel Adam's confusion, too. His anger, his hurt—I don't know for sure why he wants to walk around, but I understand the urge.

We approach the wards, and I hesitate as the magic reaches out towards us.

"We won't go far," Adam says. "I just need to be out here, you know?"

We're already out here, but I still follow him obediently through the wards and onto the street.

Sam has to know we've gone. Will he come after us?

Probably not. Maybe he hopes I won't come back. He barely looked at me when he returned earlier, and that stings more than it would if he yelled, if he told me all the things I've done wrong.

I wrap my arms around my middle. Adam needs this, not me. It's not about me.

We walk for a while, neither of us speaking, though I think Adam's turning words over in his head, working out what he wants to say.

"Why didn't you tell us?" he asks as we round a corner.

"About Hale?"

Adam nods.

I wring my hands, then push them into the pocket of my hoodie. "I-I thought I could handle it. I managed to get away from him."

"On your own?"

I think of Jeremiah and Paxton, and a pang of guilt hits me. I didn't even do that, did I? "No. Not entirely."

Adam sighs and I shake my head.

"I know it was a bad idea, okay? I know that. I just didn't know what else to do! I don't know any of you, not really, and I didn't want anyone to get hurt because of me!"

Adam's silent as I suck in ragged breaths. We're both still walking.

"That's fair," he says eventually. "Some of it, anyway."

"It doesn't matter." I all but spit the words out. "Kieran's going to get hurt anyway. I should have been able to take care of Hale myself."

"If you're not a fighter, then you're not."

"It's not—" I let out an irritated sound. "I know how to fight. But I know I won't beat someone like Hale. I don't want to."

Adam stops, and I stop with him. I suck in a surprised breath when he reaches up to cup my face gently. "That's okay, too," he murmurs. "I think Kieran's got enough fighting spirit for both of you, honestly. Plus, you've got me and Sam."

"No, I don't."

"Yes, you do." Adam shakes his head. "Sam's… hurting. Which doesn't make the shit he's doing okay, but I think he suffers under the same delusion you do."

"What's that?"

"He thinks he's got to handle everything on his own."

I stand frozen as Adam stretches up and brushes our lips together. I suck in a startled breath, but then he steps back, his hands falling from my face.

"It's some bullshit," Adam continues. He reaches for my hand, threading our fingers together before he starts walking again. I follow along helplessly. I need to tell him about the bond. My eyes burn, and I know he can hear the way my heart is racing in my chest. "But I'm sure I'll help you both get over it eventually."

I gape at him. "You—"

"What?"

"You're not serious?" He squeezes my hand when I try to pull away. "Kieran's going to get himself killed! And I—We—"

"No, he isn't," Adam says, and God, he believes it, doesn't he?

"He doesn't have a wolf!"

"No, he doesn't. But the first time I saw your brother, I watched him rip a pair of iron cuffs in two so he could jump into a fight with a vampire, so I think he might just stand a chance."

I stop short. "H-he did?"

"What, you've never seen him do anything like that before?"

"No." It's not like it ever came up. Dad trained both of us, sure, but iron cuffs never entered the equation, and Kieran's five years older than me and was always so protective… I know—I've always known—that Kieran held back when Dad made us fight each other. Kieran was yelled at enough for it. But to break iron?

I shake my head. I can't do that. I don't know any wolves who can. Maybe the cuffs were old, though, and rusty. Maybe he never broke them at all.

"I'm not saying you don't have to ever worry about him, but I think it's safe to say he knows what he's doing. You know, at least some of the time." Adam's grin is wide, and I huff a laugh.

"Yeah. I get it." Warmth floods my chest when our eyes meet, and I know it's not just coming from me.

An icy chill shivers down my spine. I need to talk to him about the bond, and I should talk to Sam, too, but the thought of telling him—

"What is it?" Adam asks. We stop at another corner, and when the wind whips up around us, I shiver. It's not too late yet, but it's a cold night, and the street is empty. Light spills from nearby houses onto the tarmac.

"I—" I don't know where to begin. I let go of Adam's hand, pressing my own against my chest. "There's something I need to tell you."

Adam tilts his head to one side, his eyes bright and knowing. "Would you be mad if I said I've already figured it out?"

"You have?"

He reaches for my hand, and I let him take it. "All you wolves—and I'm including your brother in that—think you keep your secrets so well. Did you think I wouldn't figure it out?"

Why would I? Tears fill my eyes and Adam moves in close, one hand sliding around the back of my neck to squeeze tight. That's the only thing that has me sucking in a shuddering breath.

"But Sam—"

Adam frowns. "What about Sam?"

Does he not know? Does he not care? My head spins; I don't understand. Adam wanted it to be three of us. I don't see how we could be together with Sam right there, watching…

Adam crowds closer and presses his face against my throat. "It's okay," he says. "We'll work it out. Just got to deal with a couple of tiny problems, and then—"

I go still as a tingle of magic washes over my skin. I open my mouth to warn Adam, but I'm not fast enough.

A spell hits me in a powerful, painful rush, lifting me off my feet and sending me flying to the other side of the road. I whack my head on the pavement, hearing a sickening crack. Dull pain radiates through me, but I can still feel the phantom touch of Adam's hand in my own.

I hear shouts. A scuffle. Fear rises and falls in my chest, some of it mine, some of it Adam's. I can't move. My skull is knitting back together, the pain enough to make me scream as I try to lift my head.

I'll be fine. I know that.

But Adam—

My wolf pushes to the surface as I slowly sit up. Adam's on the ground. One of the mages swears when he sees me moving. Another spell cracks through the air, and I drag myself aside to avoid it. Elliot's there. He's standing over Adam, though he turns on the mage who just shot a spell at me.

"Leave the wolf!"

I get to my hands and knees, but I can't move fast enough. Magic floods the air, not aimed at me this time, and I watch as they all disappear.

They're all gone.

Adam's gone.

The urge to shift is suddenly overwhelming in its intensity, but I can't risk it. Curtains are twitching, doors half-opening, and I shakily get to my feet.

Blood slides down my face, hot against my clammy skin, and my stomach rolls as I turn and head back the way we came.

Adam's gone.

We have to get him back.