11. Emma

11

Emma

T here was a chill in the air when Emma left the house, but the sun had burned away the morning fog by the time she got home.

When she got out of her car to open the driveway gate, she stood for a moment with her face turned up to the eastern sky and relished the feeling of sunshine on her face.

Overcast weather had hidden them from the summer sun for weeks, and it was delicious to feel unfiltered sunshine again. Her mood lifted right along with the clouds.

“Aw man!”

She opened her eyes in time to see Kai stumble to a stop halfway up the driveway.

“I was going to open the gate for you!”

“Would you close it behind me?”

“It’s not the same.”

“It would be a big help.”

“Okay.” He sighed and trudged the rest of the way up to the gate while she got back in her car and drove slowly past him.

“Hey Auntie Em,” Juniper said from the lanai. “Where’s Dad?”

“He wanted to run some errands in town.” Emma had driven Ethan into Hilo as soon as the port opened that morning so that he could pick up his truck.

“What sort of errands?”

“Some basic staples for his new place. Sheets, dishes, that kind of stuff.”

“Oh. Is he moving in today?”

“That’s the plan, yeah.”

“Oh. Okay.” Juniper looked down, picking at the flaking paint on the porch railing.

Emma added yet another item to her mental to-do list. Other than some fundamentals like doing a deep clean and getting the leaky roof fixed, she hadn’t done much to Adam’s childhood home. Maybe it was time to give the place some TLC.

She opened her mouth to say something to Juniper about chipping away the paint, then stopped when she took in the forlorn look on her niece’s face.

“Are you okay, Junebug?”

“Sure.” Jun smiled at the old nickname, but her eyes were still sad.

Emma just waited, tilting her head to one side and holding Juniper’s eyes with her own.

“It’s just that he just got here, and now he’s leaving again. I know he’s just moving across town, but I really liked having Teddy here all the time.”

“You could go with them, if you wanted to.”

Juniper’s eyes went wide, and she shook her head. “I really don’t. I love it here. And being in your house with my dad is a lot different than being ‘under his roof’, you know? You’re a good buffer. Living alone with him, especially right now, would just be way too grim. I’d rather sleep on the beach than deal with his moods.”

“You know that you never have to sleep on the beach. The tower room is yours as long as you want it.”

“Thanks, Auntie Em.” Juniper came down the stairs and wrapped her arms around Emma in a rare unprompted hug.

Emma returned the hug, holding her niece close until her arms dropped away – only then did she let her go.

“Hey, are you busy?” she asked as Juniper stepped away.

“Not really. Why?”

“I have a huge box of mangos that I need to process and freeze before they go bad. Want to give me a hand?”

“That depends.” Jun smiled playfully. “Do I get to eat my weight in mangos while we work?”

“Oh, obviously. That goes without saying.”

“Then I’m in.”

They set up shop in the shade of the carport, peeling and dicing mangos while they chatted about Juniper’s business ventures and Emma’s adventures in Hawaii in her teens and twenties. The sweet, sharp, tropical scent of mango filled the air as morning sunlight slanted beneath the table to warm their bare feet.

“He was underwater for three minutes?” Juniper exclaimed.

“Yeah.” Emma laughed. “I already knew he could do it, but everyone else was freaking out thinking he was trapped in the lava tunnel.”

“That’s some Navy Seal craziness right there.”

“Adam’s mom used to tell me that he was swimming before he could walk.” The memory was bittersweet now – they all were – but some days, telling stories about Adam made her grief a bit easier to bear. She thought that hearing old stories about Laurel might do the same for Jun.

“What did my mom do?”

“She was begging Ethan to go down and get him. Meanwhile he was trying to tell her that Adam was twice the swimmer he was, and that he was fine if I said he was fine.”

“Then what happened?”

“We look over and he’s just sitting there grinning at us. The man came up out of the water when no one was looking.”

“And what did my mom say?”

“She didn’t say anything. She just chucked an empty soda can at his head.”

Juniper cackled, setting her knife flat on the table until she stopped laughing.

“Then Ethan said, ‘I told you so,’ and she pushed him into the pool.”

“Oh man,” Juniper wheezed, “that’s hilarious.”

“Can I help?” Kai asked, standing just behind Emma’s shoulder.

She startled and nearly sliced herself with her paring knife. “Hey, kiddo. I didn’t see you there.”

“Mom? Can I help?”

“Sure.” She scanned the table, looking for something that he could do without making a mess of things. Peeling and slicing was out, and even loading the bags would probably result in a pile of ripe mango on the dirty asphalt floor of the carport.

“Can I cut the mango?”

“They’re really slippery. That’s a level of knife skills you don’t quite have yet.”

“Then what can I do?”

“Do you want to scoop the mango into freezer bags with a spoon?”

“Not really.”

“Do you want a bowl of mango to eat?”

“I don’t want to eat . I want to help !”

“I hear you, kiddo. I’m just not sure–”

“I want to help cut them! I can do it!”

She hesitated again, and he turned away in disgust.

“Ugh! Never mind!” He stomped up the stairs into the house and slammed the door behind him.

“And they say teenagers are difficult,” Juniper quipped.

“I haven’t actually raised a teenager of my own, but when I was working as a teacher I always thought that ages three to six were the absolute hardest years.”

“Didn’t you mostly teach kindergarten?”

“It’s hard, but it’s fun,” Emma said with a grin.

“If you say so.” Juniper shook her head. “I can handle Kai and Cassie for a while, but I can’t imagine trying to manage like thirty of them all in one room, day after day.”

“It’s a whole nother skill set, that’s for sure.”

They were still processing mangos, down to the final layer in the oversized cardboard box that Emma had stored them in, when Ethan got back.

“I’ll get it!” Kai shouted, racing up the driveway. “I’ll get it!”

Ethan parked his truck next to Emma’s car and walked into the carport holding Teddy’s car seat in one hand. The baby was sound asleep, his face damp with sweat from the summer heat.

“Can I leave him here with you?” Ethan asked. “I’m just going to get our clothes packed and into the truck.”

“Sure, that’s fine.”

“Jun,” he said, turning to his daughter, “I’d like you to get packed up too.”

She froze, two sticky orange hands curled in mid-air over the box of mangos.

“Ethan,” Emma interjected, “I don’t think–”

“Em, I’m talking to my daughter.”

“I want to stay here,” Juniper said, her voice small.

“I know that’s what you want, but I’m telling you what’s best. You went to stay with your Aunt Toni over a year ago, and it was just supposed to be for a little while. Somehow that turned into you floating from one place to another. It’s enough now, Jun. Time to come home.”

“I am home!”

“No. Home is where we’re together. You and me and Teddy.” He took a breath, raked a hand through his hair, and tried a softer tone. “You’ll like this place. You like that woman’s yoga classes, right? Fernanda?”

“That doesn’t mean I want to live with her!”

“It’s a separate apartment,” he said with exaggerated patience. “You’ll have your own room. It’s an ocean view in Hawaii, Jun! For Pete’s sake, you act like I’m trying to lock you in the dungeon.”

“I’m happy here ,” Jun grated, her voice close to breaking.

“I don’t care. You’re coming. Go pack.”

“No!” Juniper shot to her feet, and her plastic folding chair clattered backwards. “I’m not moving!”

Before Ethan could say another word, she turned and sprinted into the orchard.

He cussed under his breath and kicked at a stray pebble, but he didn’t chase after her or shout. That was something, at least.

“That could have gone better,” Emma said.

He shot her a dirty look. “Thanks.”

“You did a complete one-eighty! You didn’t even talk to her about it. You just came in here and started making demands.”

“I was trying to be a parent.”

“That’s not how you do it!”

“Suddenly you’re the expert?”

She just looked at him, hurt, and his face crumpled.

“I feel like I’m losing her, Em.”

“She’s right here.”

“That’s the problem! She thinks that she’s grown, and she’s not! I just want her where I can take care of her.”

“You need to take care of yourself first.”

He gave her a stricken look.

“Focus on taking care of Teddy and getting your head right. It takes time, E. I know that better than anybody, and I’m here if you need me. Just… let me take care of Juniper for a while, okay? She’s happy here.”

“She’s not happy! She’s grieving!”

“I know she is. I didn’t mean it like that.” Emma took a breath and looked down at her mango-covered hands, twisting her fingers together as she tried to organize her thoughts. “She’s suffering. But she likes it here. Don’t put more stress on her while she’s grieving by trying to force a move. Just give it time.”

“That’s what Toni said ages ago, and now look.” His voice broke. “I lost her.”

“She hasn’t gone anywhere. Not really. She’s still with family. But she might actually bolt if you keep pushing. She’ll be eighteen in a minute.”

“That’s why I want her living with me and Teddy! Her childhood is almost over, and I’m missing it.”

“Her childhood is done, Ethan.”

Pain flashed through his eyes.

“I’m sorry, but it is.”

His expression shifted from grief to anger. “Which is it, Emmaline? Is she a child or an adult? You can’t have it both ways. She can’t switch every time it suits her!”

“But she is both. That’s the age.”

“I hate this age.” Ethan put the discarded chair back on its feet and sat down. “I miss my kid.”

“I know.”

“What’s so wrong about wanting my own daughter to live with me?”

“She might be a minor for a few more months, but she’s not a little girl anymore. Trying to bully her into anything isn’t going to end well. You need to start thinking about the relationship you want to nurture with your adult daughter instead of trying to turn her back into your little girl.”

“She’ll always be my little girl.”

“I know.” Emma smirked. “And you’ll always be Mom’s baby boy. But how does it feel when she treats you like one?”

“Ugh.” He wrinkled his nose. “Point taken.”

“Just give it some time, Ethan.”

“Okay. I’ll try.”

“She’s going to be okay.”

He looked towards the orchard, fear surfacing as his frustration faded.

“I hope to God you’re right.”