.Chapter Eleven .

Tessa did try to rest. She did, but she wasn"t good at just sitting around unless it was in front of the computer. That she could do for days on end.

She"d been bluffing pretty hard in front of Deven. The moment he had stepped into the room she"d known exactly how he felt about her. It might be nice to have confirmed that bit of information, but it wasn"t worth the fear she"d seen in his eyes.

It was maybe the first time she actually regretted not being more careful. Even if her head was throbbing and her vision a bit foggy, she hadn"t really considered it a problem if she could get the information they needed. But the look in his eyes had told her she"d been mistaken. Her health mattered to him.

And what mattered to him mattered to her too. Just surviving wasn"t good enough. That bit of insight had hit her pretty hard. How would she have felt if their roles had been reversed? Yeah, that had put a damper on her excitement. If he"d been the one laid up in bed, with bandages over wounds that could have been avoided... She"d have been pissed.

Was that what he was feeling? Was he mad at her?

She turned over again, trying to get more comfortable.

Next, she noticed, night had fallen. Nothing but pale moonlight filtered in through the windows. Not just night, it was nearly early morning. The clock said it was past three AM. She had slept for a little more than seven hours. Which was a lot for her.

Was there any chance at all that she"d be able to sneak back to her office to get some work done? Not likely. Knowing Quinn, he probably set up a sensor at her door. Or a camera.

Then again, when he wanted that kind of thing done, he usually asked her. Did either of the boys know her tech well enough to find and set it up on their own? Nope, they'd be more likely to just park a chair outside her door and post a guard.

None of that mattered as much as her more immediate need. Yep, she"d have to risk being caught out of bed. She needed the bathroom.

Actually, a shower sounded damn good, too. Or better yet... a bath. Yeah, that would be perfect. Unfortunately, her bathroom did not have a tub. Unlike the master rooms claimed by Quinn and Deven, her bath had been added later and focused more on efficiency rather than comfort.

It had never bothered her much since she didn"t tend to linger in the shower longer than needed. But this time, the idea of a soak was irresistible.

She tiptoed to the connecting door between her and Deven"s rooms. She"d never bothered locking the door. Deven was trustworthy and even if he did open it, she"d be happy to invite him inside. Would he feel the same way? Was he even in his room? This time of night he would be unless he and Quinn had plans.

She carefully turned the knob and pushed it inward slowly. Peeking around the doorframe, she found the room empty. The bed was still made. There was no sign that Deven had returned to the room at all.

Perfect. She grabbed a change of clothes and one of her own towels. Then she slipped across his room and into his bathroom. The room smelled like Deven. His earthy scent mixed with soap and shampoo. It was a little intoxicating to think of him in here naked and wet...

There"d be time to daydream later.

She started filling the tub. Then took care of a little business and stripped off her clothes for a quick rinse in the shower. Having the two separate seemed a little decadent but she wasn"t going to complain. She toweled off her face and around her scabbed up temple. Then sank into the warm water. Something about the soft splash of the water and the way the heat eased into her deepest muscles... it bullied her tense body into giving in to relaxation. Before she knew it, she was half asleep leaning back against the tub"s edge.

It was nice.

Surrounded and comforted by Deven"s scent.

Did he ever soak in the tub? She tried to imagine him splashing in the water, maybe playing with bath bubbles. The giggle slipped out.

"You seem to be having fun." Deven"s low voice echoed in the small room. He was leaning against the doorframe, still wearing everything but his boots. How long had he been there watching? Surely no more than a few moments…

The thought sent a sweet vibration through her naked body. Knowing he was here, that he was watching her... how naughty it made her feel.

He straightened and shrugged out of his jacket. "I was worried when I didn"t see you in your room."

"I doubt that. You probably could tell immediately where I was." She picked up the bar of soap and slid it up and down her raised leg, making sure the action was clearly visible and as tempting as possible.

"What if I planned on bathing?" His intense gaze followed her motions.

"I can make room for you." The words slipped out before she could do more than imagine the feel of his naked wet body against her own.

"I take up a lot of space."

"It"s a big tub." Once the image of them sharing the tub had materialized in her mind, it became the one thing she wanted.

"You really are fearless."

Was that how he saw her? For now, that was fine but someday she wanted him to know about all the fears that kept her on edge. "I"m really not. I"m just not afraid of you."

"Maybe you should be." This time his voice was lower, filled with a dark demand. "When I see you naked in my bathtub, my territory, it makes me want to do things to you that are not good for someone who should be focusing on recovery."

She met his gaze across the steamy room. His expression was far too much like the predator he was bound to. She"d seen that desperate hunger before. It was very similar to how he"d looked in the chapel when they"d been drugged. This might be more natural, but it wasn"t any less powerful. Their pheromones, the chemistry that burst awake between them was in control. As a man, he"d probably hate to be powerless to guide his own actions.

But as the one who was receiving that burning gaze... She was more than willing to jump into the fire with him.

"Join me." When he didn"t move, she pushed. "You can wash my back."

"I don"t want to hurt you."

"You won"t." She stood up and let the water stream down from her body. Holding out one hand to him, she prayed he"d give in. Now wasn"t the time for him to be honorable. Seconds ticked by. Her heartbeat kept time, with each impossibly loud thump.

"You win." He strode forward the last few steps.

"I usually do."

"Yeah, I noticed." He stripped away the rest of his clothes, leaving them in a pile on top of the hamper. Once he was as naked as she was, he stepped into the tub, quickly slipping down to sit in the water. He held out his hands to her then, so much like she"d offered moments before.

She was sure she was blushing but if he asked, she was going to blame the heat. Her fingers folded over his and he guided her down to sit on his thigh. There were a lot of things that drifted through her mind. Questions about a few of his nasty scars. Or maybe about why he"d given in. Or any number of things she didn"t really want to know such as, had he ever shared a bath with another woman?

He settled her deeper into the water, braced between his spread thighs with her back pressed against the sign of how much he was affected by her presence. She was still focusing on that hot length when he folded his arms around her and pulled her back against his hard, warm body.

She expected him to touch her, fool around with her in the tub. Their passion was something that was a known certainty. Even now, her body was reacting to the nearness of his. But something told her that this moment could become special.

It was more important than sex.

"Deven..."

He leaned in close and nuzzled her neck. Sliding his fingers through her hair, he pulled it to one side. His breath hit her skin first and then his lips. Gentle, almost tentative. Then he caught her jaw and turned her head to the side, brushing a kiss over her temple where she"d been hurt. She felt his heat ease into her. His magic soothing away the injury as if it had never been. "I should have done that earlier."

"Thank you."

"Mm..." He held her close until their hearts seemed to find the same rhythm. "I was so scared when I heard you were hurt."

"It wasn"t so bad and now it"s no more than a memory."

"Please don"t put yourself in danger. It might make me a bad person, but I"d let a thousand people die before putting your life at risk."

She wished she could give him the answer he wanted but knew it would be a lie. That kind of life just wasn"t for them. This family that she"d found were the kinds that ran into danger, that put their lives on the line, and she was proud of them and proud of herself. Not that she didn"t understand where he was coming from. The thought of him being hurt or killed was downright terrifying. "You know... some couples skydive together."

"Idiots."

"Maybe, but it"s part of who they are."

He didn"t answer. Instead, he picked up the bar of soap and started rolling it in his hands to build up a lather.

"Deven, I made a mistake and I"m sorry it worried you. I promise to be more careful. But I can"t promise to stay on the sidelines, because I love what we do and who we are."

His head dipped to lean on her shoulder. "I guess that"s just another fear I"ll have to live with."

"Another?" She had a hard time picturing him being afraid. Maybe that was why the look he"d given her had struck home so hard.

"You seem to have the wrong impression about me. I"m little more than a terrified, wimpy pup."

"You pull off the big bad wolf act damn well." She caught his hand and threaded her fingers though his.

"Thank you. I"ve had a lot of practice."

He was diverting as if he regretted bringing it up. She twisted her body slightly in his arms until she could wrap her arms around his waist and press her head to his chest. The steady thump seemed a little faster than before. "We all have fears."

"What are you afraid of?"

Oh yeah, not going there. At least not yet. "Sorry, I was wrong. Everyone but me has fears."

"Now I"m curious."

She pressed a kiss to his neck before turning back around to face away from him. "You go first and then we'll see."

"Ah..." He shifted in the water slightly. His soapy hands slid down her back and then back up. Each motion just slightly roaming further into unwashed territory.

The sensation was amazing. She was tempted to let him continue since they'd surely come back to the topic eventually and there wasn't too much point in rushing. Still… "Stalling?"

His big hands slid to her chest to stroke over her small breasts. The slow circling strokes left her nipples tingling and tight. "Distracting. Wasn"t it working?"

She wouldn"t deny that his fingers moving slowly over her body wasn"t a delightful distraction. She tightened her grip on his thighs. "Maybe."

His hands continued but his resistance faded on the breath of a long exhale. "You noticed the shower?"

"I used it to rinse off." But she hadn"t noticed anything strange about it.

His exploring fingers had stilled. "I have never used it."

"Never? Not even once? Are you afraid of showers?"

He chuckled. "It"s not the shower stall itself. I have trouble with the water. The spray of the shower doesn"t cause panic attacks or anything, at least not anymore, but I still find it uncomfortable."

He was being very open but all she could think about was how bad it had to be to keep him from even using a shower. And how even with Quinn's earlier hint, she'd never put it together. "I never noticed." And how could she have never noticed? She was always watching him. Such an obvious fear should have been seen.

"I like to think I hide it fairly well. Can"t have the bad guys pulling a garden hose on me like a stray dog, can I?"

This time she laughed. She was just glad he could crack jokes about something that might be considered pretty awful. "Do you know what caused the fear?"

A few seconds of silence passed while he just held her tight. When he spoke, it was barely above a whisper. "You could say that."

She couldn"t bring herself to ask him to share his painful past, but she very much wanted to know. It was even possible that telling her would be helpful to him. Equally possible that it would be nothing but painful.

"I don"t mind telling you if you"re willing to listen. But it"s not a very pretty story. You might even lose all respect for me when you learn the truth."

"As if that could happen." She held on to his arms and noticed they trembled just slightly. "Tell me."

"Some of it you probably know. Quinn saved my life when I was young. But before that, a trapper caught me and sold me to a little zoo. I was happy to have regular meals and was getting used to life in a cage. It wasn"t all that bad for a few years. Until the hurricane hit landfall. The owners abandoned the zoo to take shelter. Unfortunately, the levies meant to protect the animals gave way. Between the rising waves and intense wind and rain..."

"Oh." She could see the picture of the nightmare he was describing.

"The storm threw debris everywhere. My cage was a little higher than the others. I got to watch the other animals all suffer and die. I treaded water for what seemed like hours, for just as long as I could. Maybe it was exhaustion, or taking on too much water or any number of injuries... I don"t actually remember anything after passing out."

She felt the sting of tears in her eyes. His voice had stayed flat, but she couldn't even imagine how horrific it must have been. "You couldn't even use magic yet, could you?"

"Almost not at all."

"Wait, doesn't that mean that you'd have become human for the full moon? Isn't that how it works until you're old enough to control your powers?"

"I had just enough control to stay in wolf form."

She imagined the young version of him, trapped inside an animal cage. She'd done a little research on Valàfrn. "But if you could change, why didn't you escape?"

"Because it wasn't that bad. I had food and shelter and was even relearning human language. I was afraid to lose that security."

He'd been in a cage. Yet, he'd seen it as an improvement over what had come before… "You mean it could have been worse."

"Maybe I would have eventually let myself out once I was more confident in my ability to survive."

"But then there was the hurricane."

"By the time I considered trying to escape it was already too late. All the salt water took away any magic control I might have managed. According to Quinn, he saw me floating in the cage but could tell I was still alive. He broke the cage open and dragged me out."

"He saved you." She squirmed in his lap until she was facing him once more. Something about this conversation demanded that she be able to see his face and touch his body.

"He did save me. He claims it was just a whim on his part, but that's not the truth. To save my life he had to put himself in danger and risk serious injury."

She tried to imagine Quinn actually in danger and couldn't picture it.

"Have you heard about how vampires can"t cross moving water?"

Once she'd realized that Quinn was a vampire, she'd done all the possible research before saying yes to his offer. But most of her research had been based on fiction. "Isn"t that just an old wives" tale?"

"In part, but large bodies of moving water will cause them disorientation. And salt water will burn them. Quinn faced all that and still dragged a half dead pup out of danger."

"He"s a good man." She wasn't even all that surprised. She'd seen him go above and beyond more times than she could count in the short time she'd known him.

"He really is."

The quiet idolizing tone in his voice was sweet but it sounded like he was talking about someone far outside of his reach. But Quinn's honorable spirit lived within Deven too. "You are just like him. I"m very glad he saved you."

"Even if I don"t like to swim and avoid showers?"

"Even so."

His fingers sank into her hair and angled her face up until her gaze met his. His lips found hers and brought them together with a gentle flush of something warm and lasting. The passion was still there but softened into something far more precious.

When they finally parted for air, she met his golden gaze with a chuckle. "Maybe we can do something fun in the water to help you like it more."

"You might be onto something because this water is starting to feel pretty nice."

"Nice wasn't what I was aiming for." She reached down between their bodies and stroked her fingertips along the length of his shaft. Already standing at attention, it hardened more with the motion. She cupped her palm around him and tightened her strokes.

He dragged her back into another kiss. This one didn't even pretend to be gentle or coaxing. Instead, it dominated her. Or at least tried.

She met it straight on and gave just as good as she got. At least she thought she was holding her own until he slipped one hand between her parted thighs and began stroking her cleft. It was wild and intense and within minutes she gave up trying to kiss him, surrendering fully to the sensations running wild in her body.

"Damn… I need to be inside you." His voice was more growl than words.

She couldn't agree more. But she wanted to stay where they were too, and the two desires didn't fit together in the tub. But maybe… She brushed a kiss over his lips and turned once more to face away from him. This time she shifted her knees to outside of his thighs and angled his cock up to meet her entrance. Then she pushed down over him. The angle kept him from thrusting too deep but somehow it made him feel so much thicker, almost too much to take.

She stretched upward and wrapped her arms around his neck. The motion pushed her breasts out and he claimed them in both hands. She was left trembling, strung tight over him with her back arched and her core overfilled so that every twitch echoed wave after wave of pleasure through her body.

She'd planned to keep control, but she was lost to the cresting pleasure. Each spasm of desire stacked onto the next one until she wasn't sure where one ended and the next began.

"Tessa…" Her name growled from his lips was her only warning. Then his arms tightened, and his shallow rocking became more violent.

And she shattered over him, clenching tight and clawing at his shoulders. And he met her there in that sweet abyss. Because she was pretty sure she was passing out if the flashes behind her eyelids were any sign. "Holy… damn, Deven. I'm never going to think of bathwater the same."

"Agreed." Even though his frantic embrace had relaxed, he didn't release her completely. Instead, he just held her close and snuggled his jaw against her neck and shoulder. "You are amazing."