Chapter 22

CHAPTER 22

T he days leading up to our wedding became progressively more difficult for me. Each time I saw Korth’s eyes light up when he saw me forced me to imagine how tormented they would be when he learned of my deception. Every walk in the gardens made me cling to his hand a little tighter, wishing I could pause time and exist in a state of perpetual bliss, unburdened by the rebellion’s plans.

Each time I wished for such a thing, I immediately felt guilty for wanting to be free of the rebellion when the citizens depended on me. All I needed to do was keep Korth happy and in love with me. That wasn’t such a hard task when I was falling for him harder each day, but it was slowly shredding my heart.

All the time, I was waiting. Waiting for a message from the rebellion—or even from King Raquel himself, gloating about our failed coup. Anything would have been better than the endless waiting game.

“I love you,” Korth said, for what felt like the eighth time that day. Each time was said with more fervor than the last, and with each subsequent profession of love, I wanted to curl up from shame. My entire life, I had planned for a mission such as this, and I was succeeding, so why did I feel like such a failure?

“You said on the night of the masquerade that you would love me unconditionally.” The sour, twisted feeling in my stomach knotted.

“We talked about this before. Unconditional loving is what all married couples should do.”

I chewed my tongue. “The only unconditional love I’ve ever seen is that of a parent for a child. Even murderers and thieves have parents who still love them, even if they are disappointed in their actions.”

“Anyone can choose to love unconditionally.”

“Would you love me even if I weren’t a princess?” I asked, trying to keep my tone light and playful.

Korth laughed. “A question that’s inconsequential, given that you are.”

“But what if?”

Grinning from ear to ear, Korth responded, “Of course. Would you still love me if I were a farmer?”

“Naturally. You would be a very handsome farmer. What if I was…” I bit my lip. “A spy?”

“It would be easy for you to coax all my secrets from me, then, wouldn’t it?”

His words fell like nails in the coffin of my conscience, and I swallowed my response like a bitter medicine. Love made my deceit a consuming, agonizing burden I wasn’t strong enough to carry on my own anymore.

Korth rubbed his thumb in distracting circles on my palm. “My love for you has no conditions.”

Godfrey trailed behind us, watching us with those baleful eyes. As we crossed the topmost crest of a bridge that spanned the small stream leading to the lake, Korth silently raised my hand and pressed his lips against the back of my knuckles. We exchanged conspiratorial looks, relishing the fact that Godfrey had no way of knowing the tradition Korth and I now shared.

I would never be able to look at another bridge again once I left Haven Harbor. Could I tell Korth? Was his love for me strong enough to overcome anything else?

“Korth, I wanted to tell you?—”

“Your Highness!” A servant hurried toward us. “The tariff master wishes to see you. He says that the trade negotiation you arranged with Berkway doesn’t match the documents from one of the merchant vessels that came into port today.”

“Sorry,” Korth told me regretfully. “Duty calls.” Before he left, he pulled out a pocketknife, cut off the largest of the rose blooms from the nearby rosebush, and offered it to me. After I took it, he began to lean toward me. Godfrey frowned and shook his head, so Korth changed direction and bent to kiss my hand that wasn’t holding the rose. “I’ll see you later; we’ll talk then.”

He pivoted and left, trailed by his manservant, who looked immensely relieved that he hadn’t needed to run interference on any shows of physical affection. I continued to stroll through the gardens, thinking hard. Unless something changed, our wedding would take place in a few days. I would be Korth’s wife. I repeated it again in my mind, reveling in the phrase. Korth’s wife …

If only I could be honest with him. I wanted to, but honesty would lead to certain death, or at the very least, imprisonment. I traced my finger over the rose Korth had given me, reveling in its fragrance and velvety softness. Time was running out. When would we receive word about the rebellion?

“Hey.” Curdy’s harsh voice intruded on my thoughts as he turned a corner. Dark bags under his eyes showed just how sleep deprived he’d become, and the ripe smell of goose droppings lingered about his person. Particularly around waist level and below, his clothing was frayed, as if the geese never lost an opportunity to peck at him, and the blondness of his hair was nearly hidden in all the dirt that was layered on his body.

“Is Garrik with your sister?”

“Yes. He is doing his job.” The pointed inflection made me look up in surprise. Curdy’s posture was stiffer than normal, and his face had soured into an ugly expression.

“And I’m glad of it. How is, you know, she doing? Behaving herself?”

Curdy cracked his knuckles with unnecessary force and ground his teeth together as he worked his jaw back and forth. I watched him curiously. What was he so agitated about?

“It’s fine. No trouble. How is it going with the prince?”

“Perfectly,” I answered, still tracking how Curdy’s feet pounded the dirt back and forth and his fists flexed and unflexed repeatedly. “Thank you for being there at the masquerade. You didn’t get hurt, did you?”

Curdy’s face reddened. “You said before that he would protect you. Guess you were wrong about that.”

“We were caught unaware.”

“Because he’s an entitled royal,” Curdy spat. “Then when I protected you, that still wasn’t good enough.”

“I said thank you, and I do appreciate what you did. It’s not like I can shower you with gifts of thanks when I have a cover to maintain.”

“I should’ve let him get robbed.” Curdy’s eyes darkened as he glanced down at the rose I held, and the vein in his neck bulged. “He deserves it.”

“No, he doesn’t! What is wrong with you? Korth is?—”

“Sure, tell me more about Prince Perfect,” Curdy snarled. “You want to think that you’re actually a princess he loves, but he would hate you if he knew the truth about you, and you know it.”

“Stop it.”

“It’s true though,” he went on venomously. “All this time, when I’ve known the truth about you and was there for you, you wouldn’t give me the time of day, and now you’re throwing yourself at some rich snob. I guess you only ever cared about money.”

“Where is all this coming from?” I asked in frustration, trying to keep my voice low and glancing around to ensure that no gardeners were nearby.

“You were kissing him during the Night of Masks festival,” Curdy spat, sounding much more accusatory than was necessary.

“I was. The whole point of me coming here was to get him to fall in love with me, remember? For just about any man, that will involve a certain amount of kissing. I’m just not sure why you felt compelled to watch.”

“You didn’t have to do it so enthusiastically,” he snapped. His cheeks burned bright red and his eyebrows were so contracted that they formed a solid line.

“Curdy, why are you so jealous? There has never been anything between us.”

“Jealous? I’m not jealous!” Curdy’s voice rose higher with every word he spoke. He cleared his throat. “Why would I be jealous? I just don’t like you cozying up to him, that’s all. He’s the enemy , remember?”

“No, he’s not. Korth is?—”

“Ooh, it’s still just Korth, is it? You haven’t given each other revolting nicknames yet?”

“You’re being ridiculous.”

“At least I’m not being a hypocrite,” he snarled. “More than you can say.”

“What are you talking about?” I couldn’t prevent my temper getting the better of me. My blood pressure was rising every second we prolonged our conversation.

“Here the rest of us are, carrying out all the dirty work while you lounge about, sitting on cushions and being the exact kind of royal scum you swore to overthrow. You haven’t done anything but play kissy face with that prince from the moment you got here.”

“That was the entire point of me being in this position,” I hissed. “I’m the one who knows enough about Odette’s duties and habits that I can impersonate her without arousing suspicion. I’m the one?—”

“You’re the one whose father is leading the rebellion, and he wanted to give you an easy job. Nepotism at its finest.”

“That had nothing to do with it. I was the best person for the job, and I’m doing it well.”

“I bet you are. I’m sure your oh-so-noble prince has you right where he wants you. What else do you do when you sneak off in the dead of night? I’m sure he gets lots of extra privileges from you when you are closeted together, doesn’t he?”

“Korth has been a perfect gentleman this whole time, and that’s more than you can say.”

“No wonder he can’t tell you apart from the real princess. You’re exactly like Odette.”

Smack! Before I could stop myself, I struck Curdy across the face. I hadn’t thought his face could get any redder than it had been, but a deep maroon in the shape of my hand rose on his cheek.

The moment after I hit him, I put my hand up to my mouth, horrified by what I’d done. Curdy grabbed my wrist and slammed it up against a stone statue. He made no effort to be gentle. It hurt.

“Let go!” I tried to wrench my hand away, but Curdy held fast. His face had transformed into an ugly expression.

“No. I’m done taking orders from you.”

“Stop!”

“You can’t tell me what to do anymore.”

A tiny thimble bounced off Curdy’s head as a thin voice shouted, “Hey, you big bully! You leave her alone!”

I didn’t think my stomach could have sunk any lower, but the sound of that voice tore at my heart. Sure enough, when I turned, I spotted Tess, her fists on her hips and feet splayed out as if she stood seven feet tall instead of her tiny, youthful frame.

“Tess, it’s fine, I can handle this,” I said, forcing calm into my voice. “My friend and I are having a little disagreement is all.”

“If he’s being mean to you, he isn’t a friend at all.” She glared at Curdy for all she was worth. “You leave Odette alone!”

“I think I shall,” Curdy crooned, shifting his focus back to me, and I matched his glare. “I won’t lay a finger on Odette. You have my word. Now run along, little girl. I want to talk to my friend .”

I heard Tess’s feet scamper away. I was glad. Whatever came next, I didn’t want her witnessing it.

Curdy flung my wrist down. I massaged it, taking several steps back to distance myself from him, but he followed me, crowding me up against a wall. Though I flung a hand between us to shove him away, I wasn’t strong enough to force him back.

“Curdy, don’t. We’re on the same team here. You don’t understand. I’ve been doing my part.”

“Oh, I understand better than you think I do. All this time, I’ve wondered if you’ve intentionally been slow about getting him to send the ships. This was never about maintaining our cover or going through the proper channels or waiting for the right moment, was it? You’re in love with him, aren’t you? You don’t want to go through with the plan anymore.”

“Curdy, I?—”

“See? You aren’t even denying it! Here I was, thinking that the daughter of the rebellion’s leader could be trusted, but no. You’re just like the rest of them, aren’t you?” He leaned down to hiss in my ear. “I wonder what would happen if I told Odette how to access that dumbwaiter you love so much and let her give me the slip. I’m sure she’d love to pay you a visit.”

My skin crawled. Curdy had me all the way up against the wall; I had nowhere else to go. “Get back,” I commanded, trying again to shove him away and failing again. He pinned my shoulder against the wall. I curled inward and shut my eyes, trying to shield myself from Curdy’s wrath.

“There you go, giving orders again. You really do love power, don’t you? You preach about how power corrupts, and yet here you are demanding people cater to your every desire. You are just as shallow and self-absorbed as?—”

Suddenly, he was wrenched off me and the ugly sound of knuckles meeting flesh rang through the air. I looked up, daring to hope.

There stood Korth, chest heaving and hair disheveled while he shook out his hand. Tess trailed him, panting as she ran and held her skirts up to her knees.

I sagged in relief. I was saved.

“Tess, get the guards,” Korth called, but I pulled on his arm.

“No! No, please let him go.” I really would be like Odette if I punished a comrade who had been loyal to the rebellion for a year over a bout of jealousy. If he was arrested, he was sure to be questioned. How much could I trust that Curdy would stay faithful to maintaining my cover?

Korth glowered at Curdy. “He never should have put his hands on you,” he rumbled, keeping his voice surprisingly level considering that he had just punched someone.

“No, he shouldn’t have,” I agreed.

“Give me one reason I shouldn’t have him thrown into prison.” Korth still hadn’t taken his eyes off Curdy, and under my fingers, his muscles were trembling and tense.

“Because I asked,” I said softly. “Please. I don’t want to see him imprisoned. It was just a misunderstanding is all.”

Tess looked questioningly at Korth, still poised to run to fetch the guards.

Korth blew out a long stream of air. “I’ll only tell you this once,” he told Curdy coldly. “If I ever see you near my fiancée again, I’ll have you arrested on the spot, and even she won’t be able to save you. Leave, now .”

Sighing in relief, I shrank against Korth’s side. The moment his arm closed around me, I was able to breathe again. I was safe. I had no question in my mind that Korth wouldn’t hesitate to put himself in front of me, no matter how many or few weapons Curdy had. Even Tess, armed with the miniscule seam ripper taken from her sewing kit, looked ready to stab Curdy’s thigh with the tiny needle if he attempted to threaten me again.

Curdy’s face, which still bore my hand mark and was swelling rapidly, tightened. He inclined his head slightly. “I see how it is,” he said stiffly, then marched off.

Korth folded me into an embrace so that my face pressed into his shoulder while his arms locked protectively around me. I felt Tess wrap her thin arms around my waist from behind, squeezing me so tightly that she could have been a python, but I didn’t care, nor did I want either of them to stop. Korth rested his chin on the top of my head as he watched Curdy’s continued retreat, ensuring that he left for good.

What would Curdy tell Garrik? Would he believe him?

“Who was that?”

I rested my head against Korth’s chest, finding it much easier to listen to his heartbeat than to meet his eye. “He came with us from Ebora and has been tending the geese. Remember the family I told you about who wanted to stay together? He’s the son. I thought he was a friend, but it seems that he was jealous of the time I’ve been spending with you.”

Tess let out a small squeak, like a mouse being trodden on. “He likes you even though you’re engaged to Korth? But that’s wrong!” She searched the ground for her lucky thimble she’d thrown at Curdy and stooped to retrieve it.

“It was a surprise to me, too. He had teased me before, but I never thought he was serious.”

“It doesn’t surprise me,” Korth said slowly. “I think most men would be attracted to you. What surprises me is that you didn’t catch on before now.”

“He made a few remarks, but he always said them like he was teasing, and since we worked—since he worked for me I didn’t think he was actually serious.”

“I must admit I’m astonished that a servant would make such remarks to royalty.”

My stomach clenched painfully. “He was my handmaiden’s…cousin. I suppose he felt more familiar with me since his cousin and I were friends. I swear I never gave him any indication that I wanted?—”

“I believe you,” he said simply. “I wasn’t accusing you in any way. Anyone who saw you two when I found you could vouch for your innocence. He was at fault, not you.”

I clung to Korth, still shaken, as my mind whirled. I needed to talk to Garrik before Curdy got a hold of him. I’d been so focused on Korth that I hadn’t paid any attention to Garrik or Curdy or Odette. I wanted to trust that Garrik was still loyal, but what stories had Curdy cooked up about me in my absence? The one small benefit was that most rebellion members had been satisfied with my work when they went back to Ebora. If it was only Curdy and possibly Garrik who mistrusted me now, it wasn’t the worst thing. If I asked him, Korth would have Curdy thrown in prison without hesitation. If I did, I knew Curdy would never forgive me. He would rat me out.

Surely, Curdy would know that I wished him no ill since I’d let him go. Korth rubbed my back, and I closed my eyes at his touch, resting my cheek against his firm chest and sighing.

My allegiance to my country and mission had a fierce competitor, and I wasn’t sure where my loyalty lay anymore.