20. Phaedra

PHAEDRA

I woke the next morning with Asher and that kiss still burning in my mind.

It was the first time I'd woke feeling rested. The mere thought of him energized me. Taking a seat at the vanity, I brushed my hair. The extent of his injuries worried me. Just before he'd shifted, I'd seen the bruises on his skin, both fresh and dark, as well as old and yellowing.

I wanted to touch each bruise, kiss them, as if my touch could heal him simply because I willed it. I wanted my hands on him, and I wanted to rip Connor's head off his body for hurting him.

My fierceness surprised even me, but my wolf was pacing and panting with the desire to kill Connor. I guess I was taking a cue from her, but I had no intention of acting on it. At least not right now. He would get his just desserts soon. I would make sure of it.

I washed up and got dressed to meet Penny at her study. This energy needed to be put to good use. As I stepped out of my room, I nearly bumped into a maid who was walking quickly with her head down.

"O—oh, pardon me, ma'am," she stammered.

"It's fine," I said. "Are you all right?"

She looked up at me, and my eyes fell to the red imprint of a hand on her cheek.. She quickly looked away. "I'm fine. Thank you for asking. I—I need to get going." Before I could ask her anything else, she went around me and kept going.

For a moment, I was sure she'd tell me what was wrong, but something closed her off again. I wasn't sure why until I stepped out into the corridor and spotted Connor, Kestrel, and Randall walking to the main entrance. Randall took up the rear and walked a few feet behind them, giving the two of them the illusion that they were able to talk without being reminded of his presence.

Almost as one, the three of them looked at me, but I only locked eyes with Kestrel. The darkness in her eyes made me want to shiver, but then I remembered the fear in that maid's eyes and the mark on her cheek. I was banking on her presence making a stir, but I wouldn't let it stand if she was terrorizing the servants.

I strode toward the three of them. I wanted to jump right into asking what had been done to that maid, but for the sake of appearances, I curtsied to Connor first.

"I met a maid when I was coming out of my room," I said. "She looked like she had been slapped."

"That was—" Connor stared to respond, but Kestrel interrupted.

"She very nearly spilled hot tea on me."

Indignation flared in my chest. "If it was an accident, why punish her?"

"To ensure the accident didn't happen again." Her lips curled into a smile. "I could never let that kind of disrespect stand, could you?"

"I wouldn't punish someone for making a mistake."

"You wouldn't?" She shook her head in faux sympathy. "Not very becoming of the alpha's future mate. Letting things like that go."

What I wanted to say was not something I could get away with saying in front of Connor. So, instead I said, "It's not very becoming of an advisor to the alpha to let every perceived threat push her to violence. I would expect you to maintain some sense of decorum." Before I could stop myself, I added, "Maybe spending so much time on the outskirts of Isle Royale made you forget your manners."

Her cruel smile disappeared as her lips flattened into a straight, unamused line. I'd struck a nerve

"Ladies, please," Connor said as if he was part of the conversation. "I'm flattered, but you shouldn't be arguing like this in front of me. What if the staff were to see?"

Kestrel and I broke eye contact to look at him. What was he flattered about? Did he think somehow that the argument had anything to do with him? Was he imagining us vying for his approval? The slight smirk on his lips told me he did. His arrogance ought to be studied by psychologists around the world. Even Randall couldn't keep the bafflement off his face.

"I do have some work to do," I said, deciding it was in everyone's best interest for me to ignore that. "If you'll excuse me?—"

"Randall, go with her," Connor said. "Make sure that what the two of them are doing is in the best interest of the pack."

"That's not necessary?—"

"Why not spend the entire day shadowing her?" Kestrel said, speaking over my protest. "I doubt Connor has much need for you today."

Randall and I looked at Connor, who shrugged. "You heard her, Randall. Keep an eye on my future mate today."

I resisted the urge to sigh as Randall peeled away from Connor's shadow to become mine. He bowed to Connor, and I curtsied again before we walked to Penny's quarters.

"I have a question."

I turned my head to look up at Randall. I'd expected him to be his usual, quiet and stoic self during the walk, but apparently not. What would he want to know from me? Connor had to have him doing recon.

"What is it?" I asked, more clipped than was polite.

He must have noticed my tone, but if it bothered him, he didn't let it show. "I wanted to ask about Theodora."

"Theo?" I repeated.

He nodded. "I haven't seen her around the manor today. Did you send her on an errand."

"Oh." His question alleviated some of the darkness that hung over me from speaking with Connor and Kestrel. He just missed Theo. "No, she's off for the next few days," I said. "She's visiting family in Den City."

"Ah, so that's what it was." He straightened again and nodded at me, smiling gratefully at me. "Thank you. I know it was a sudden question."

"It's all right."

His hard features returned to its usual stony, blank expression. He seemed content to just walk, but now I was starting to feel bad about how clipped I was with him.

"Randall? I'm sorry for being so rude. I thought you were going to ask me something Connor wanted to know."

"He does have questions, but I won't ask them."

I raised a brow. "No? Why not?"

"There's no point. I doubt you'd tell me what he wanted to know, right?" The corner of his mouth quirked up just slightly. Randall? Joking?

I smiled. "That's true. But I will answer your questions about Theo. She's a safe topic of conversation."

"I thought you were worried I was dangerous?"

"You are," I said. "Undeniably so. But Theo doesn't seem worried about you. I trust her judgment."

Randall took a breath, held it, then slowly let it out. For the first time, I didn't have any trouble reading him. He wanted to ask what I meant by that, but that would mean revealing his feelings.

I smiled, content to let him sit in those feelings for a while.

As we approached Penny's door, I heard laughter on the other side. It was Penny's voice, and… Selene's? I opened the door without knocking, as I usually did, and the two women looked up. Selene was standing behind Penny, leaning over her, pointing out something on the paper in front of her. It was obvious they'd both been laughing—especially from Penny's end. Her normally pale cheeks were flushed.

My mouth had fallen open with shock, and I quickly snapped it shut. "So," I began slowly. "What's going on here?"

Selene cleared her throat and took a step back from Penny. "Nothing," she said.

"Nothing?" I repeated, looking at Penny.

The redness in the apples of her cheeks quickly spread to the rest of her face. "Selene was…" Penny hesitated, glancing at Randall. "Selene was helping me balance some wages."

I raised a brow. "Since when have you needed help with accounting?"

Penny and I were speaking in code. She wasn't sure what she could say around Randall, and I wasn't sure what I could say around Selene. Somehow, we'd each taken strangers into our folds, but where Randall was forced on me, it seemed Penny wanted Selene here.

"I think I'm going to step out," Selene said. "Randall, maybe you would also like to…?"

Randall took the cue and nodded. "We'll be back in a few minutes."

When the door clicked shut, I rushed to Penny's side so we could speak quietly.

"What the hell was that?" I asked.

"It's kind of a long story," Penny said, still blushing.

"Sum it up for me, Pen. I thought you hated her for betraying Asher."

"I thought I did, too, but we talked, and?—"

"You talked to her?" I demanded, my whisper rising in pitch. "When?"

"Yesterday, after you went to Den City with Theodora." Penny sighed. "She was waiting for Connor when I was taking some documents to the guards to take into Den City. I can't remember exactly what I said—something snarky about her looking like she didn't belong in this huge manor, and she agreed. Then she told me I looked like I didn't belong here either.

"I was offended at first, but she wasn't being mean. She was so calm and genuine. I don't know, something about her just… took the fight out of me. I wanted to listen to what she had to say. She said it like she understood some of the hell I was going through. I didn't need to confirm that or tell her that Connor had left us to do the real work of managing a pack. She could just tell. She told me she'd had to take over her pack at a young age, and that if I needed any help I could consider her a resource."

I stared at my friend. It was like she'd been put under a spell. How had that conversation led to her liking Selene so much that she would let her touch Wilcox pack documents?

"And you took her up on her offer?" Incredulity and a bit of my frustration seeped into my question.

"Yes, I did. She wants to help, and she was helpful at the luncheon. Selene genuinely wants to do better, so I invited her here. And to be honest, I'm glad I did. She's actually… really nice to have around. It's less stressful dealing with paperwork when I have someone with experience to bounce my thoughts off of."

I continued to frown at her. "You didn't think that maybe you should talk to me about that first?"

"I… I thought it would be fine," she faltered. "We need more people on our side, and Selene wants to make amends." I saw the moment the realization hit her. "Okay, I understand where you're coming from, Phae, and you're right, I should have talked to you about it. But I made an executive decision. I'm sorry."

I wanted to rage at her and at the fact that such an important choice had been made completely independent of me… but I knew Penny, and I knew she wasn't lying. She really did believe she'd made the correct decision. She hated her brother for what he'd done to her father. She wouldn't throw that away just because she was attracted to Selene.

I sighed. "So, you trust her?"

"Yes, she came to me with information yesterday, and—" She cut herself off with another quick sigh. "Goddess, I can hardly speak. I'll just let Selene tell you herself when she comes back in. In the meantime, you can tell me what Randall is doing with you."

"Connor made him join me," I explained briefly what went on in the hallway. "He and Theodora definitely have a thing for each other," I concluded.

"I guess if anyone would be able to tame someone like Randall, it would have to be someone as gentle and good-natured as Theo," she said. "But what do you think? Can we trust him?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. Theodora likes him, and I think it's pretty obvious that he doesn't like what Connor's doing to the Dagger pack… but it's not like she's giving him every detail of what we're doing."

"True. Then again, that might be out of loyalty to us and not because she's worried he would sell us out."

Penny chewed on her lower lip. "Since he's Connor's right-hand, we should keep him as out of the loop as possible. Who knows if Randall is a good liar?"

"I think that's a good idea, but how much do we tell him?"

Penny shrugged, and we sighed in unison. We were back to square one. We were still deliberating when Selene and Randall returned, talking softly together. That set me and my wolf on edge.

"… and I think we're seeing results already," Selene was saying. She stopped when she saw my stony expression.

"What were you talking about?" I demanded, looking from one to the other.

"I was telling Randall about the plan," Selene replied. If she or Randall minded the suspicion in my question, they didn't show it. "I briefed him on where you all are so far."

"You did?" Penny asked, and we exchanged a worried look.

Shit. Yet another decision had been taken out of my hands. I felt like control was rapidly slipping away from me. The version of me that had lived and worked in Den City might have cut her losses and gotten the hell out of here. But I couldn't do that. Even though it was scary, even though it made me want to run out of the room, I had faith in both Theo and Penny. If she trusted Selene, then I could try and trust her, too. But could we trust Randall? He could very well go running to Connor the minute he left here.

I needed to see where we were at as far as this plan went. If there was a leak from either of them, were there any secrets I could still keep? Secrets that could be useful to securing Asher and his pack's freedom?

"We all need to talk," I said. "Right now."

Penny and I cleared the table so the four of us could sit. It wasn't like either of us could get work done right now anyway. The Wilcox pack would hardly suffer if we slacked off for a day.

"So, Randall, now you know our plan, what are you going to do?" Penny asked. "Are you going to sell us out?"

"There's no use in being dishonest," I added. I would know, just like I always knew.

He was quiet, his gaze landing on each of us before he spoke. "I think," he began, "it would be one of the greatest dishonors for the alpha's right-hand to conspire against him."

He wasn't wrong. It would be difficult for someone in his position to go down in history as a traitor.

He drummed his fingers on the table. "That said, I won't stop you, either. I don't think I can participate directly, and it's probably not wise for me to try, considering my position, but I will not tell Connor about any of this."

My eyebrows shot up. I couldn't mask my shock at how matter of fact he was being about this.

"Isn't that still treason?" Penny asked, pinning him with an intense stare.

"There's enough plausible deniability there for me," Randall said. "I'm not getting my hands in it directly."

I still sensed no lies in what he was saying. If he wanted to keep himself a bit distant from this, I didn't care, as long as he didn't run his mouth. But Penny leaned forward, her mood shifting from surprised to annoyed within seconds.

"Are you sure you don't want to get involved?" she asked. "You sure you'll be happy keeping your hands clean? Don't you know what he did to my father?"

I looked from the intensity on Penny's expression to Randall. His careful mask had slipped into one of confusion. Penny looked from him to Selene.

"I didn't think it was my place to tell him about that," Selene said gently.

"You witnessed it," Penny pointed out. "You and Phaedra."

"Yes, but I wasn't sure whether you would want Randall to know."

I started to tense up. We were about to reveal something to Randall that would be absolutely devastating to him: the truth about Edgar's death.

Randall had been orphaned when he was a young boy. He grew up without a den or family to call his own, so he used to get into all sorts of trouble with guards in the marketplace. I didn't know the details of how Edgar and Randall met, but Edgar had seen the potential in Randall as a fighter and took him in with the intention of introducing him to Connor. Randall went on to become Connor's personal guard, and ever since, he had served loyally at Connor's side.

Edgar was the closest thing to a guardian Randall had had growing up, and was, from the story I knew, the only person who had any faith in Randall. Without Edgar intervening in his life, Randall would probably have nothing.

"What isn't your place?" Randall asked cautiously. "What about Edgar?"

"Penny," I began, wanting to advise caution. "Maybe we should?—"

But she ignored me.

"Connor killed him," she said. "In cold blood. Without trial or even a conversation, he killed my father. Stabbed him in the back, and then he sliced his neck. Connor killed him."

Randall stared at her, then looked from me to Selene and back again. "This can't be true."

"It is true," I said gently. "Exactly as Penny said, I was there when it happened. I—" For the first time since we started planning to revolt, I was taken back to those moments and the sting of fresh, hot blood hitting my face. "I saw all of it. Everything."

"But…" He paused, searching for words. The open shock and dismay on his face nearly broke my heart. "Why would he do something like that to his own father?"

"Because Edgar had the ability to get rid of the Dagger pack from the moment he killed Asher's father, but he didn't do it," Selene said.

"Why not?" he asked.

I shook my head, and Selene shrugged.

"Connor didn't give him the chance to explain why," I said.

Randall stared down at the table. Confusion and uncertainty warred for its place on his face. "That doesn't make sense. I admit I've never fully understood Connor or his motives, but he can't have killed Edgar. He wouldn't do that."

I looked at Penny. She didn't look angry anymore, only sad. Having to admit something like that about your family couldn't be easy.

"If you need to take a minute to yourself, you can do that," she said. "You can tell us how you feel about everything later."

For several seconds, Randall didn't move, not even to breathe. And then he gathered himself up and silently walked out of the room.

I released a long breath once the door closed behind him. I hoped he didn't run into Connor while he collected himself. I'd never seen Randall go all out with anger, but if anyone could take him there right now, it'd be his alpha.

"While he's collecting himself," I said, looking at Selene, "I want to know why you decided to come to our side, Selene."

"Oh." She blinked and looked at Penny, who was dabbing her eyes with a handkerchief. "I'm surprised Penny didn't tell you."

"I thought it'd be best for you to explain," she replied with a sniffle.

"I see. Well, that's fair." Selene smiled a little at Penny, but the smile dropped as she started speaking. "A couple of days before that banquet, I overheard Connor speaking to his advisors. They were trying to convince him to get rid of that old crone. He told them the real reason he had her on his side was so that she would help him take over Isle Royale. All of Isle Royal—every pack, every wolf—all under his control."

I raised an eyebrow. Now that made some sense. "Did he say how she planned to help him do that?"

She shook her head with a sigh. "No. They asked him about that, but all he said was to trust that the plan was already in the works."

I nodded. So, that was the reason Connor was so keen on bringing Kestrel in. The witch had promised to make him a king. And Connor, wanting to be a better alpha than his father, couldn't resist something like that. Did Kestrel have the power to do that? My gut said no, but we'd given her that book. Who knew what other things were in there?

I rubbed my temples to stave off the brewing headache. "So, you're on our side because your pack is in danger."

Selene winced. "Well, yes, but it's not just that. It's also because I regret the way I treated Asher back then. I was…" She hesitated, then shook her head. "After he broke my heart, I was furious. I felt like he had chosen his own desires— you ," she clarified, "over both of our packs.

"I thought I was in love with him, and I couldn't accept that he'd altered our agreement without discussing it with me. He tried to make amends with me, but I refused to let him. I let my pain get in the way of my decision-making and ended up betraying him and allying myself with an asshole." Selene rubbed her hands over her face. "What I've done has gone far beyond what Asher did. I am racked with guilt for the way I behaved. I want to make things right."

I studied her closely. "I hope you're serious about that. We're working directly with Asher and the Dagger pack. If you're on our side, that means you'll have to meet with them face to face. Do you think you can handle that?"

She gave a firm nod. "Even though I'll be carrying the weight of my betrayal for the rest of my life, I want to see Asher and his people again. I have to apologize in person, and when this is over, if they want to punish me, I will gladly accept it. Whatever it is."

"Do you intend to give them their land back?"

Again, she nodded. "Of course. It was never mine to begin with."

I sensed no lies in what she was saying, so I took that to mean she was serious. She was telling the truth about wanting to make amends.

I nodded slowly. "All right."

"‘All right?' Really?" Her brow furrowed. "You're seriously okay with me being on your side? Just like that?"

"As long as you understand the risks as well as the rewards of what we're trying to do…"

Following my prompt, she nodded. "Of course I do."

"Then, yes. Connor thinks you're one of his lackeys, and you're an alpha. You're an asset to us."

Selene sagged back against the chair. Huh. I hadn't expected that she would be terrified of what I'd say to her. How could I have said no? We could always use more people on our side, and she had a pack on hers. It was a small pack, true, but I was sure they were as well trained as Asher's. An added bonus was that they were the only people not under Connor's control. No curse and no alpha command could prevent them from doing what needed to be done.

"I think it's probably best we do not meet during the daytime. We want to minimize the chance of being seen."

"That's what Penny and I have been doing. We just wanted to let you know where I stand."

I glanced at Penny, who was using the handkerchief to hide the pink in her cheeks. I smiled and reached across the table to shake her hand.

"Well, welcome to the team. We're glad to have you."

"I'm glad, too. From what I've seen, I think there's a good chance we'll win."

I smiled, but deep down was a twinge of something that felt too close to doubt. I hoped she was right.