Chapter 4

Chapter Four Scar

Laughter tumbles from my lips.

Of all the things I expected him to ask, that was not one of them. For the first time, maybe ever, I break. My mask slips off my face as I throw my head back and laugh at his request. It’s not even an intimidation tactic, or calculated in any way. My true reaction just broke through with how fucking surprised I am.

I shake my head, trying to ground myself in order to continue this conversation.

“You want your father dead?” I ask to clarify.

He nods slowly, thrown back by my reaction. Once more, his eyes trail over all the weapons in the room. “I get the feeling you’re more than capable of it now.”

I lift a shoulder casually. “You’re not wrong,” I concede. “What if I told you that’s why I came back?”

“To kill my father?” he stammers with wide eyes.

“He did rape me after all.”

He nods along with my words, horror written in his expression. It’s nothing he didn’t know, but apparently he doesn’t like hearing it. “Revenge,” he whispers. “You came back for revenge.”

“I think I deserve it after what happened in my father’s office,” I drawl slowly. “And everything afterwards.”

His body slumps forward, guilt overwhelming him now.

“Charlotte,” he whispers, almost pleadingly.

“Everyone out,” I cut him off. The guys start to protest, but I throw them a look that promises retribution if they continue to push me. They walk out silently, throwing menacing glares at Charles the whole way.

Joe stops just inside the door and closes it after the others. I open my mouth to question him, but he shuts me down in a way only he can. “I understand why you don’t want them in here, but Scarlett, if you think I’m leaving you alone with a man we do not know or trust, you’re stupider than you look.”

I hold my tongue. Not wanting to argue with him in front of Charles. “Fine,” I agree, if a bit petulantly. A slight tremor runs through my fingers and I know I’m not as strong as I’m pretending to be. I didn’t want the guys to see my weakness. Not here. I don’t want to break in front of Charles, and having them here makes it all the much harder to stay strong. When all I really want to do is collapse in their arms and cry for the girl that used to love the boy in front of me.

I won’t admit it aloud, but I’m thankful for Joe’s silent presence behind me.

“It’s Scar now,” I remind Charles. “Any single one of those guys will kill you if you use that name again.”

“I understand,” he murmurs. “Scar,” he says slowly, like tasting my name to get the feel of it. I watch as he tries to reconcile who I am now with the girl he remembers.

“What do you know about that night?” I ask, changing the subject. I aim to maintain my perfect calm. Not give anything away. But fuck, it’s a lot harder than it ever has been before. I keep my trembling hand out of Charles’ sight.

“I know it wasn’t as the news made it out to be,” he starts. “My father was there.” He closes his eyes, lost in his own memories. “He wasn’t the only one there.” There’s anguish lining every word. It makes me mad. Pisses me off that he feels pain over my trauma when he didn’t help me.

But it also makes me sad. For some inexplicable reason, sadness weighs me down at the thought of the kids we were who were dealt a hand we had no hope of being capable of handling. We were always helpless against the wishes of our parents. I wonder what his father pulled behind the scenes to turn even Charles against me back then.

“Do you know who the others were?” I ask, trying to shake off the grips of melancholy holding me down. I don’t want to feel sympathy for him. Not when he hurt me too. I’m not ready to analyze those emotions yet. For now, I just want to use him.

He shakes his head and a bitterness fills me. “My father never told me what happened. He doesn’t even know I know.” He opens his eyes, searching me out. “I put some of the pieces together myself, but I only knew those couple things for certain,” he whispers. “Scar,” he starts again, but I shake my head.

“I don’t want to hear your excuses or your reasons.”

He looks shattered, but for some reason I feel the same way. Tears rise in my eyes, blurring my vision and I hate him for it. “I’m not ready to forgive you,” I admit, swallowing my emotions. I hate that I get the feeling I will be forgiving him, but not today. Not right now.

“Then use me,” he replies. “Use me to get your revenge. Use me however you need to.” He hangs his head. “I failed you once, Tootsie Roll. I won’t fail you again.”

The nickname is a brand of regret over my already sensitive heart. I open my mouth to respond, but snap it shut almost as quickly. No. Charles will be nothing but another tool to get my revenge. Nothing more.

* * *

I pullthe cover over my head as I hear the door open and close. I can take a guess on who just walked into the room, but I’m not ready to talk about it yet. So I hide. I burrow myself under the blankets and sheets. Just like I left Charles and hid in here.

I only waited long enough to give Joe instructions on getting him settled. I know I’ll need to pull myself from this hole and go out there to make plans. I still have so many questions for Charles. Have to figure out exactly how I can use him.

A moment was needed before I could do all that though. A moment to wallow in my own despair and confusion before putting on the brave face to push forward.

The bed dips on both sides of me. I don’t move, waiting for them to pull me to one of them. The covers are removed from over my head and I find Noah giving me a soft smile as he pulls me on top of his chest.

I rest my cheek against his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat. Declan lays on his side, resting his hand on my back. I figured it would be one of them that came in to check on me, I didn’t expect it to be both of them. I give Declan a small smile that he returns, rubbing circles into my back.

“Want to talk about it?”

My smile falls off my face and I turn my head away from D and bury it in Noah’s chest. It rumbles under me with his laughter. It might bring a small little smirk back to my face, but I’ll deny it.

“I’ll take that as a no then,” D teases, lightly tickling my sides. I humph in response, not lifting my head at all.

“How about telling us what you want us to do?” Noah encourages, squeezing my hips.

I sigh, if I had an answer for any of them, I wouldn’t be hiding in here. I don’t want to admit that though. “I just needed a moment,” I deflect, lifting my head to meet his eyes. I catch them trading looks and know I’m not getting off that easily.

“And what do you plan on doing after your moment?” Noah prods.

I roll my lips back as I think about it. Plans have been my happy place for a long time. Meticulously figuring out the next steps to take to maximize our outcomes and minimize the risks. Maybe focusing on a list of what I need to do will help my head stop spinning.

Who said I have to figure out the convoluted feelings Charles dredged up right now?

“Charles is going to help us,” I start. Noah tenses under me, but I push forward. I know none of the guys are going to love his presence, especially Kade, but there’s no denying this is the best move forward. He has access to everything we need to get my revenge. He said to use him, and regardless of what my feelings are, I plan to use him for everything I can. “I need to figure out just how helpful he’s going to be.”

Noah opens his mouth but Declan speaks first. “What do you need to know to figure that out?” I release the breath I didn’t realize I was holding. I knew these two would be the two most likely to see my side of things.

Sticking to only the facts and keeping all emotions out of it is the only way to come up with the best plans.

“How involved he is with his father’s business. How close they are. What he knows about his associates. If he has any thoughts or leads about who else was there.” I pause, reflecting on our own conversation. “Just what pieces he has from that night.” I shake my head, clearing it. “But more importantly, what he knows now. What connections we can use. If Romano did run to his father. If he knows who Romano is.”

“Do you think he will tell you the truth?” Noah asks.

I nod my head, climbing off him. “He has no reason to lie.” If nothing else, I believe that. Charles hates his father, maybe almost as much as I do.

“Then let’s go get your answers, baby girl. Anything he gives us will give me more to work with. I’ll be able to fill in any gaps and catch him if he does try to deceive us.” He looks to Declan, before turning back to me hesitantly.

I tense, knowing he wants to move away from the practical part of our conversation. I’m still not ready to admit just how I’m feeling about it all right now. There’s a mess of writhing demons in my chest, clamoring for different things. Too many things to even attempt to put into words. How can wanting to forgive someone make you hate them even more?

“Can we ask about him being your ex?”

I force myself to take deep breaths. They have reason to want to know more about that, especially since I plan on keeping him around. I give a short nod. “He’s my ex-fiance.”

Noah rises up on his knees and catches hold of my hands, pulling me back to the bed. “We won’t make you talk about it if you’re not ready,” he assures me. Guilt prickles at my conscience. They’re always so willing to roll with all the punches I throw their way.

I let myself lean into his arms, resting against the bed. “We were engaged before I was even born,” I explain. “Our fathers were as close as monsters can be. We grew up together. Grew up knowing we would always be together. One day we would merge businesses. Charles would lead our families into new and greater wealth. The engagement ended the same day my family did. I lost all status, all power, even my beauty was marred. That’s all I was worth to them. There was no reason to continue the engagement.”

Declan nods along even as Noah looks appalled. He didn’t grow up in our world, doesn’t understand how these things work. People from our circles didn’t marry for love. Only for money and power. I scoff. “I guess I should be thankful his father didn’t think to use Charles to steal my wealth from me too. It was the last thing I had.”

“He probably didn’t want to risk drawing any eyes his way. Better to cut all ties,” Declan muses, an angry glint in his eyes, making his cool blue eyes burn hotter than I’ve ever seen them.

“Do you want to share why Kade seemed like he was struggling not to kill him?”

I shake my head. I’d rather not get into all that.

Noah huffs an exasperated laugh. “And why is that?”

“His anger is justified,” I explain. “I don’t really want both of you reacting the same way to him.”

Declan pulls me further onto the bed and cages me under him. “Are you going to forgive him for whatever it is he did to you?”

I should have known that D would never be able to leave a thread unraveled. Not when it has to do with my emotions. He will push as far as he thinks I can stand. Somehow, he always knows exactly when to back off though. Understands me better than I know myself sometimes.

“I don’t know yet,” I admit in a whisper. “But maybe I want to.”

He searches me out, as if he can read my every inner thought just by focusing on my face. After several heavy moments of silence a pained expression takes over his face. “You think he’s like us,” he says.

I can still see Noah in my peripheral trying to follow along with the conversation, but I can’t tear my eyes away from D to see if he’s confused. “I think he might be,” I whisper.

With that small admission I know I have Declan’s full support and understanding. No matter how deep my wounds run from Charles’ betrayal, can I still hate him if he was just as helpless as I was in the whole situation?

The power our parents wield over us is unlike any normal familial relationship. It surpasses that of a typical parent-child dynamic. We never had the ability to say no. If we tried we faced abuse and even the possibility of death. Like I came all too close to myself.

Declan presses a sweet kiss against my forehead. “We will figure it all out, pretty girl.”

He moves away from me, letting me climb off the bed for a second time. “Let’s do this,” I say, fortifying my walls.

I can’t let anyone see just how weak I feel on the inside. How unsure I still am about this path. I believe Charles won’t betray me. I just don’t know what I’ll be putting myself through the more I talk to him. He was one ghost I had intended on leaving in the past. I never thought I would be picking at those old wounds, but here we are. Now it’s too late to turn back. The scab has fallen off and the blood is already flowing. I won’t be able to stop until I know everything. Until I forgive him or forget him permanently.

I lead the two of them out into the hallway just as the door at the other end of the hall opens. Joe leads a freshly showered and changed Charles out of the room. I meet his eyes and nod. “Follow me,” I direct, my voice already stronger. Sounding more like myself.

I don’t look back again as I head back to the living room where I can hear the others arguing. They must hear us coming because the commotion quietens before we even reach the large room. I didn’t overhear enough to even try and guess what they were arguing about, but it’s clear the matter wasn’t settled.

All four of them stand at different points of the room, their bodies tense, arms crossed over their chests as they glare daggers at each other. The living room looks different than when I briefly saw it before. The guys must have moved the furniture around to create a circle around the coffee table that almost mimics the setup we have in our office. Not that any of them are using the setup while they argue back and forth. Probably shouldn’t have left all of the hotheads unattended for so long.

The only one I’m really surprised about is Ian. He normally takes direction well even if he’s an ass. The only time he’s ever popped off to one of us in a way that could get him in trouble has been directly related to Jade. So what is it now?

We should have brought Holden too. I didn’t think we would need another cool head to help keep the others in check.

“Am I interrupting?” I taunt as I walk further into the room.

Kade relaxes for a moment before he spots Charles behind me and is immediately back on guard. Practically vibrating with his anger. I sigh to myself. I knew this was coming. I study Luca to find him only marginally more composed.

All of a sudden, I’m thankful Declan and Noah both came into the room to check on me. I’m going to need all the backup I can get on this.

“Scar,” Ryder calls my name with relief. A smile gracing his face. I know they are all worried about me and tensions are running high but we need to continue forward. We can’t afford to get entangled in our pasts. Our mission hasn’t changed.

Romano first.

Then the four men who broke me.

All five of them will be erased from this planet and the world will be a better place for it.

As everyone spreads out around the room, Charles stays just behind me, almost not even in the room. Joe leaves his side to move across from me, while Declan and Noah flank my sides.

No one bothers taking a seat. Too revved up to even consider it.

Might as well jump into the thick of it.

“From this day forward, we will be working with Charles.”

As expected Kade opens his mouth to yell his opposition. “Scar!”

I hold my hand up. “No.” My stance is firm. There will be no changing my mind on this. We have a golden opportunity and while I may not fully trust Charles, I trust myself enough to know this has more pros than cons. Any trouble he may try to start wouldn’t come close to being enough to bring us down.

“Letty.” Luca tries next, his voice no more than a threatening growl.

“I said no,” I repeat, my voice harder. Rolling off my tongue with the grit of my agitation.

I turn to where Charles stands in the shadows. “Time to give me all of the information you can. But I’ll have you know, I’m not the girl you once knew.”

“I know,” he says almost silently.

“No, you really don’t,” I laugh. “You think you do. But I’ve spent the last eight years dealing with monsters just like your father. Turning into a monster of my own brand. I have my own claws, my own fangs now. Dripping with poison and ready to kill at a moment’s notice. You have no idea what I’m capable of. The blood I’ve spilt. The blood I crave. Just how creative I can get when someone even thinks about betraying me. Don’t make me provide a demonstration. Okay?”

Charles moves forward from the shadows, yet still the man shows no fear. It’s something I just can’t understand. He’s had guns trained on him, been kidnapped, threatened, and none of it has made him even blink.

Though, he isn’t wholly unaffected by my little speech. No, his demeanor shifted with each word out of my mouth. Just not the reaction I anticipated. He seems weighed down in his grief. It sparks tears in my eyes and anger in my veins all at the same time.

I don’t want him to be sad about who I became.

And yet… I can’t stop being sad for the kids we used to be either.

No matter how happy I am in my life now, with the family I built for myself, it will never change the fact that my current happiness was born from the tragedies that destroyed me. I’ll never stop being sad about everything I lost in that fire eight years ago.

“You should believe her,” Ryder adds cheerfully, breaking up the emotional atmosphere. “She threatened to cut off my dick and make me choke on it when she thought I might be lying to her.”

A surprised laugh eddies up out of me. I’m not the only one either. I look at Ry and know he did it on purpose. It makes my smile all that much more genuine.

He looks around the room and shrugs. “What? Felt like he needed a nice and clear picture.”

I shake my head as I wave to everyone to sit down so we can get to planning. I can’t help but notice that Charles does look just a bit paler than before. I should have known. Even a man who isn’t afraid of death is afraid of losing his dick.

Just about everyone follows my direction, except for Kade and Luca of course. Charles hesitates, but only for a moment before taking a chair directly on the other side of the coffee table from where I sit on the couch. Joe takes a seat at his side and after a quick look in my direction, Ian takes the one at his other side.

Noah falls onto the cushion on my right side while Ry steals the one on the left. Declan places his hand on my shoulder and stays standing at my back. His eyes roving over the others, a silent threat to all of them not to push me. The silent warning wafts off him in palpable waves.

Charles is the first to break the silence. “What do you need from me?”

Straight to the point. I like it. Makes it easier to know where to start.

“Where is your father staying currently and where has he been recently?” Start with something easy. Just because he was there that night, doesn’t mean he was the one Romano turned to.

“We’re staying at the Fairmore house for the next month or so. We came a week before the gala but Father had business he wanted to stay in the area for.”

“Do you know what?” I interject but he’s already shaking his head.

“I’m running most of the meetings on our legitimate business while we are in town.” He doesn’t have to verbalize what he means. Whatever his father is here for, it isn’t legal. Sure, they have their businesses here that do need their attention and in-person meetings, but Charles is taking care of it on his own.

“I wasn’t supposed to stay longer than a week here though,” he continues. “I met him in Cherry Hill and we flew out here together. That was when he asked for me to take over his meetings that he had set up because he had other important matters to attend to. He did say he wouldn’t be traveling far from Fairmore so I know he will be around.”

I hesitate to ask my next question. It’s important but even saying the name of my hometown after so long feels wrong.

Charles doesn’t miss a beat even as I struggle to ask. “Our base is still Eastvale,” he answers without making me ask. I can’t suppress the shudder at hearing that name. I don’t think I ever will. “He spends most of the year there, with only brief trips here and there. A trip of this length is unusual.”

I look at Declan to get his thoughts on the matter before turning to Luca. I think the two of them would have the same line of thought that I’m thinking. If his father changed his plans after being in Cherry Hill, there’s a good chance it’s because of Romano.

“Do you know Arthur Romano?”

“The name Romano,” he stops. “I’ve heard it over the years, but I couldn’t even begin to point you in the right direction. He’s connected to my father, but I don’t know how.”

I continue to ask him questions, trying to find out if he’s heard the name recently but we don’t get far. It seems his father really does keep him out of the shady dwellings he likes to reside in. I have to wonder why. He must believe he has Charles firmly under his thumb, yet never has tried to bring him into the seedier aspects of where their money and power really comes from.

“Have you ever met him?” I ask, more on a whim than anything. Maybe he’s seen him recently and didn’t even realize it.

“I can’t put a face to the name, no,” he answers readily.

Noah is already handing a tablet over to me, a picture of Romano already enlarged on the screen. I hand it to Charles who takes his time studying it.

“I’ve seen this man before.” He says the words slowly, like he isn’t entirely sure of them even as they come out of his mouth. “I can’t place him though.” His frustration starts to burn through. “I feel like I should know.”

“Recently?” Noah asks as he takes the tablet back. Charles hands it back with one last begrudging look towards the photo.

“No. Definitely not recent.”

I sigh, we could have been so close. I guess it doesn’t matter anyways. I still believe we are on the right track. I lean back against the couch and close my eyes as I think over the implications of the information I have now.

Noah takes over interrogating Charles for any bit of seemingly useless information that can point us in the right direction. I continue to listen as they compile a list of properties, aliases, bank accounts, associates, businesses, and every other possible thread that Noah and I will be able to pick at until we unravel his entire life.

Charles is as forthcoming with the information as he can be. Even giving details Noah hadn’t gotten around to asking yet.

I need to decide just how much to tell him before sending him back. If we can find where Romano is staying, wiping him off the board will be as easy as breathing. I just need to be careful to not give anything else away when I give Charles his instructions.