Chapter nine

One week.

One week, since I last saw Donnie.

I grab my phone to check for any new messages, but there aren't any. With a frustrated sigh, I turn the phone over and toss it near my feet on the bed.

"You're an idiot," Tia says from where she sits beside me swallowing her food. Tia has fully recovered from her injuries and cried with me for days when she found out about Josiah.

"What?"

"I said—"

"I heard what you said, but why?"

"You keep pushing him away, yet you check your phone every fifteen minutes to see if he's called. Why don't you just call him."

"I can't, Tia." I rest my head against the pillow.

"Yes, you can. That boy has been there for you even before all this shit went down. He's been sleeping outside your door on those hard ass chairs for you. He's been missing sleep, for you. He hasn't eaten because of you. You get where I'm going with this?"

God, I hate it when she's right. A few days after my meltdown, Donnie and his family arranged to meet with the funeral director to plan Josiah's funeral. I couldn't handle being in the same room with the funeral director as he explained the burial process, the number of styles and colors of coffins to choose from, and which of his favorite outfits to wear.

It was too much to handle.

I swallow a big lump of regret.

"God, I'm such a bitch."

"Yes, you are," Tia agrees.

FLASHBACK

Donovan age 8, and Sadie age 7

"You were wonderful!" Mom said excitedly when Ash and I ran toward our parents.

It was our last game before school let out. I was, excited to see Shorty's face light up with pride after each game, but a wave of disappointment hit me.

"Where's Shorty?" I ask Mom, looking over her shoulder, hoping she is hiding and will jump out and say, "boo!"

But she wasn't.

"Oh, I'm sorry, honey. Her mom said she was sick and couldn't attend the game."

"But she never misses a game," I say quietly, shoulders slumped.

"Can we get pizza now?" Ash asks as we follow Mom to the car.

"Yeah, baby. We can get pizza."

"What about Shorty? She likes pizza." Her favorite pizza is barbeque, and mine is pepperoni with sausage. The only food we both like is hot dogs and ice cream.

"It's ok, Donnie. We can bring her a slice," Ash says as we climb into Mom's car.

"Yeah, okay," I say sadly, buckling up.

I feel relieved when we pulled up to our house after the pizza shop. I jumped out of the car before Mom can put it in park.

I ran to Shorty's house, but Mom's voice pulled me back. "Donnie!" she yelled.

I turned around to face her.

"What?" I asked impatiently.

"Why don't you wait until tomorrow to see her?" Mom grabbed the pizza box out of the car and shut her door with her hip.

"No, Mom. I need to see her now." Irritation surged inside me.

"Donovan Jacob Reeves," Mom warned. "You get in the house, take off your uniform, and shower."

"But Mom!" I threw my hands in the air in frustration.

"Don't make me tell you again. Get in the house," she scolded, gesturing toward the house.

With a huff, I stomped up the stairs and down the hall to my bedroom.

After taking a shower, I stood in front of my bedroom window, looking out into Shorty's window, but her shades were shut.

That's weird. She never closed them, knowing it made me worry when I couldn't see her—to know she was okay.

I try to keep myself busy by playing Mario Brothers with Ash, working on my 3-D Superman puzzle, and watching TV, but nothing works.

I'm getting more and more nervous.

Not able to wait any longer, I jumped off the couch and went into the kitchen. Mom was busy baking for the bake sale we're having at school.

"Mom, can I go to Shorty's?" I asked, trying to stay calm. Every second, minute, and hour felt like torture without being able to check on her.

Why couldn't Mom see that?

"Sweetheart, it's getting late." She wiped her flour-covered hands on her apron.

"But Mom, I haven't seen her all day," I whined, annoyed that my mother wouldn't listen.

Mom sighed loudly and said, "You'll see her at school tomorrow."

"Mom, please?" I begged.

She shook her head and opened her mouth to say something, so I interrupted her before she could.

"What if something happened to her, Mom? Please!" I stomped my foot.

She turned around to wash her hands. When Mom turned back to face me, she sighed, "How about I call her mother to make sure she's okay."

That's not going to work for me.

I shook my head. "No, I want to see her, Mom."

"Donnie, it's called a compromise." She left no room for argument with her tone, and I had no choice but to agree.

I nodded and pulled the kitchen chair out to sit.

My knees bounced nervously as I wait to hear what Shorty's mom had to say.

After Mom dials the number, she puts the cordless house phone to her ear.

Waiting.

Still waiting.

"Hi, Claudia, this is Jacquie."

Finally.

"I wanted to see how Sadie was doing. We missed her at the game."

"What did she say?" I mouthed.

"Uh-huh. Okay, please give her a hug from me, and I hope she feels better."

Mom hung up the phone.

"So, can I see her?"

"Not today, sweetheart. Shorty is very sick. Just wait until tomorrow, okay?"

I don't want to wait until tomorrow! I want to yell and throw things. Why won't they let me see her?

I slide out of the chair and run to my room, ignoring Mom calling for me. Once I made it to my bedroom, I slammed the door shut. I moved toward the window and peeked through the blinds.

Shorty's shades are still closed.

No light.

No movement.

A few minutes later, there's a knock at my door.

"Go away," I called, but the door opened anyway.

"Is Shorty okay?" Ash asked with concern.

"I don't know."

Ash sat on the bed and grabbed my walkie-talkie.

"Shorty, this is Ash. Can you hear me? Over."

Static is the only sound we hear.

"Curly Sue, tell us you're okay. Over," Ash tries again.

Nothing.

When the sun went down, Ash retreated to his bedroom after another failed attempt to reach Shorty through the walkie-talkie. My stomach was tied up in knots, worried something terrible happened to Shorty.

What if her dad hurt her again?

What if I never see her again?

My eyes filled with tears, and I wiped them away.

After brushing my teeth and putting on my pajamas, Mom kissed me goodnight and turned the lights off.

I was lying in my bed when a loud crack of thunder roared in the air. The rain poured down, each drop beating against the window. I rolled on my side, so I faced Shorty's window. Suddenly, a light flickered through the window.

And it wasn't lightning!

I yanked the covers off and sprung out of bed like a pogo stick. I quickly slipped on my Nikes and jacket and climbed out the window. I don't even care that my pajamas will get soaked from the rain.

I land on the muddy ground with an oomph. I grabbed the step stool that was kept in front of my bedroom window and ran across to Shorty's window.

Setting the stool down, I raised my foot onto the step and gently knocked on her window. I used our secret knock: one, three, two, and two.

I waited.

The rain continued to pour from the night sky.

And waited.

Finally, the curtains are pulled back, and I can finally breathe. Shorty pushed the window up but stopped midway when she cringes like she ate a lemon. I pushed the window up the rest of the way and climbed into her window, landing on my feet.

I closed her window to keep the rain once I'm finally in her room. I removed my wet shoes and jacket, tossing them onto the floor.

"Are you okay?" I quietly asked Shorty.

"Yeah," she said in a whisper.

She turned away without looking at me. Her small steps look like all she can manage as she walks toward her bed. Why is she walking funny?

"Shorty, what's wrong?"

When she climbed into her bed, she whimpered in pain. I get to her quickly and helped her under the covers. I sat beside her, waiting for her to either ask me to lie with her or leave.

I hope she doesn't want me to go. I hadn't seen her all day, and I was dying inside.

After sitting in silence for a while, Shorty says, "Did you win?"

I hid my smile and ignored the flip in my stomach, knowing I was on her mind.

"Yeah, we won. I missed you."

"I'm sorry, Doni. I—I wasn't feeling good," she said without meeting my eyes.

If anyone knows Shorty well, it's me.

And I know she's lying.

Why is she lying? Doesn't she trust me?

"Shorty, what happened?"

She pulled the covers up her chest…

"Come on. We don't hide from one another." I reached for her hands to pause her movement forcing her to look at me.

She didn't respond and a lonely tear escaped her eye. I reached to wipe it away, but she flinched.

I stop with my hand in midair.

"Shorty—why did you move away from me? You know I would never hurt you, right?"

Shorty shakes her head but still won't look at me.

I took a deep breath and tried to relax, but it was hard when all I felt was panic bubbling inside me.

Then it clicked.

"Shorty, di-did your fa-father hurt you?" I swallowed a lump of fear.

One.

Two.

Three.

"Yes."

Three seconds.

One word.

My chest cracked in half, and I wanted to turn into the Hulk.

Smash!

"Doni, I hurt." Her voice cracked.

"Where do you hurt, Shorty? Where did he hurt you?"

She shoved the covers off and pulled her pajama legs up.

I couldn't move or speak. Purple and blue bruises that looked like splattered paint covered both legs, one bruise the size of a baseball on her upper right thigh, and scrapes on both knees.

"Oh, no." I tried to hide the pain in my voice, but I couldn't hold it in any longer.

I cried.

Boys don't cry.

But I did.

"It's okay, don't be sad for me, Doni," she softly said.

I shook my head, not believing her. She's in pain but doesn't want to show me because she wants to be like Wonder Woman.

"Is your dad home?"

She shook her head.

"Can I stay with you?" I asked, not wanting to leave her alone.

She nodded.

I pulled her pajama legs down and climbed into bed with her. She cuddled to my side and cried.

She cried until she fell asleep.

PRESENT- SADIE

After my talk with Tia, she made me realize that Donnie has been there for me through this whole mess, and I'd be stupid to throw it all away by letting him go. Basically, she told me to get over my shit already.

Speaking of Donnie… He stands by the doorway, taking up the whole frame. Just the sight of him brings my body to life, him standing there looking all…hot.

"You came back," I say softly.

He nods. "I did. I will always come back for you, Shorty."

"I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you." I lower my head, staring at the IV in my hand.

"I know," is all he says in a flat tone.

There's that tightening in my chest again.

Have I lost him? I wouldn't blame him.

I can no longer bear the silence. I open my mouth to speak, but he beats me to it.

"I will do everything and anything for you. Don't you get that?"

I look up to see him inch forward until he sits beside me on the bed. He takes my face into his hands and stares at me intensely. "When you're hurting, so am I. When you feel like giving up, I'll be there to remind you how strong you are. When the pain becomes too heavy for you, I'll carry that weight for you. I'll be your rock. I'll never abandon you, no matter how much you try to push me away."

My lips quiver.

I don't know what to do. I think back to all the times Donnie was there for me. It's true —he never gave up on me, and he never will. He will always find me, and he will always save me.

"It wasn't supposed to be like this. This wasn't supposed to be his ending." My lips tremble and a sob forces its way out. "I just want to be numb. I don't want to feel anything. It's to-too much."

Suddenly, I'm wrapped up in Donnie's strong arms. I cry on his shoulder. He holds me tight and lets me fall apart.

"It's too much," I repeat, my throat thickening.

"I know. I got you. It doesn't feel like it now, but It's going to be okay. You are going to be okay," Donnie reassures me while rubbing my back.

After my meltdown, I fall asleep in his arms. The only place I need to be, where I want to be.