Chapter 42

Things move smoothly the next few days. By the fourth day, all the ranchers have joined in and we’re nearly ten thousand cattle strong. I’ve never seen so many cows in one place before. Between eleven ranches, there are at least fifty cowboys, but I can’t exactly keep track. Cattle dogs are everywhere, doing their jobs as expected. Apparently, despite so many cattle, the majority of the cowboys will still go home each night since we’re not too far away. It’s an amazing sight while we drive them though. I take at least a hundred pictures with Levi’s phone. He doesn’t complain once.

Our days are spent busy keeping the cattle moving and making sure none of them wander off, which turns out to be a huge feat with so many cows. Still, everyone seems to know their role and exactly what to do when a cow wanders off. I stay along the back with Wiley, Dakota, and Levi, making sure they keep going forward. It’s slow-moving but considering we only have to go about five miles a day, it’s not a huge problem.

Each night, once the cattle graze and settle down for the night, most of the cowboys head back to their own beds to get some sleep. They always come back before the sun rises. Each morning starts with the bustle of horse trailers and activity as each ranch has their people bring back horses and supplies. I don’t know how everyone organizes things so fluidly. There are very few hiccups to worry about and when something happens, one of the other ranchers step in. One ranch didn’t have enough food, but another had extra. The next day, the one who hadn’t had enough brought extra. Things like that. Everyone is friendly. It makes it easy to settle into things.

By the fourth day, the ache in my thighs has dulled a bit, most likely because I’m just getting used to the ache. Maple has been given the day to rest so instead, I’m atop a different horse today, a pretty spotted gray one named Hermioneigh. Dakota and Wiley both ride different horses as well so their normal mounts could get some rest. I appreciate that they take them into consideration. I also appreciate how I’m able to clean up each evening when they bring the small camper around for the bathroom and shower and I know William enjoys sleeping in there as opposed to my tent in the heat. Wiley told me I could sleep in it if I prefer but the camper has to stay on the road. I don’t want to be too far from them if someone comes looking for me.

“We’re crossing the river today,” Wiley comments as he tilts his head back to the sky. The sun shines across his face and highlights his scruff. There isn’t time for shaving, so his normally clean-shaven face is scruffy now. It only ends up making him more attractive.

“Is that bad?” I ask, glancing over at him. So far, we’ve only crossed land and followed the river. We haven’t had to cross it before now. The way Wiley says it though doesn’t sound good.

“It can be,” he admits, glancing over at me. “The cows aren’t too fond of going into the water and if they panic, they could stampede.”

I grimace. “That does sound bad.”

“It’s not,” he backpedals when he sees my expression. “We’re all well-trained in this. The dogs know their jobs and we have plenty of cowboys with us. It’ll be fine.”

But I know he’s just saying that to appease me. I don’t doubt that everyone knows their tasks or that they know what they’re doing. This is a lot of cattle, and mistakes are bound to happen. I just hope whatever danger comes with crossing a river is minimal. It isn’t until we come up beside the river behind the cattle that I understand the true danger.

We’ve had a lot of rain lately.

The Green River is choppy and rough today because of the rain washing down the mountains. Where we need to cross, the water is brown from being churned up and the levels are a little higher than we expect. We can’t wait for it to calm down because there’s only so long we can keep the cattle in one spot. We can’t go further down the river because it only gets deeper. We’re gonna have to cross now whether we like it or not.

And Dakota really doesn’t like it.

“There’ll be no walking across,” he says, looking at the cowboys around us. “The river’s too rough. We stay on our horses. I don’t want anyone gettin’ swept away. Levi and John will help the dogs across on their side-by-sides.”

“Wouldn’t it be best to wait?” a cowboy whose name I don’t know asks.

“You go try and tell those heifers and cows to wait,” Dakota teases, but his expression is serious when he adds, “we take things nice and slow. The river isn’t kind today and I don’t want any mistakes. Anyone got any questions?” When no one speaks up, he nods. “Alright. Same formation we’ve been in. Steele Mountain’ll bring up the rear and get them pushed across. Send your cattle dogs to the back. Let’s get this herd moving.”

It sounds easy enough at least. Dakota makes everything sound like a cakewalk, but looking out at the churned up river, I’m not so sure. Still, I do what he says and move to the back of the herd just as we’ve been doing.

“Make sure you guide your horse into the water slowly,” Wiley instructs as he mounts his own horse beside me. “You don’t wanna rush her, but you also don’t want her to dictate where to go.” He reaches over me to pluck William from my saddle. He meows in annoyance. “I’ll take William across. I’d rather me suffer the scratches than you since I know what I’m doing. This way you can focus just on you.”

“Firm hand. Gentle guide,” I say, nodding. “Got it.” I shake my finger at William. “Behave.” But he’s already clinging to Wiley for dear life when he sees the water in front of us.

Wiley whistles and the sound is repeated throughout the line, every cowboy giving the signal for those that may not hear. There’s a whole herd of cattle dogs that come to the back and help us to start pushing the herd forward. It’s slow, and at one point, we completely stop when the cattle hesitate to step into the rushing river.

“What about the babies?” I ask, worried for them.

“Their mamas will guide them,” Wiley reassures me. “And we have plenty of cowhands up there to make sure they get across if not.”

The calves aren’t nearly tall enough. They’ll have to swim across while their mothers keep them from rushing down river. Despite Wiley’s reassurance, I worry about it the entire time as we push the herd forward. It takes a few hours before we even start seeing the edge of the river. Having so many cattle means things move far slower, and along the way, the calves just don’t want to get into the water. I don’t blame them. The closer we get, the more intimidating it looks. The water rushes past at a far faster rate than any of the river we’ve travelled along so far. Sticks and logs rush by, catching on the edge every now and then, coming down from the mountain. The water isn’t blue anymore. It’s a deep and mottled brown. And the cows are walking across it like it’s nothing.

Well, not nothing. Many of them look distressed once in the water, but the cowboys keep them moving. They follow each other, mooing in protest, rushing to get across. At least it seems like smooth sailing so far.

“Kate,” Dakota calls to me from where he’s pushing the cows forward. “You go on across, so we don’t have to worry about you.”

Wiley whips his head toward Dakota. “It’d be better to wait until the end?—”

“She goes across now,” Dakota interrupts, his voice hard. “Go on, Kate. In front of Levi.”

There are still at least hundreds of cattle waiting to cross. I assumed I would cross once they were all on the other side, but Dakota’s face leaves no room for argument.

“Okay,” I answer, not wanting to prove I don’t know what I’m doing. I direct Hermioneigh down river to where Levi sits on the side-by-side waiting to take the dogs across. I know his side-by-side is fit with snorkel gear so it can drive across, but part of me worries about him just the same.

Hermioneigh prances nervously at the river edge so I pat her neck. “It’s okay, girl,” I coo. “We’ll be in and out before you know it.”

“Slow and easy,” Levi instructs. “Give the cattle plenty of room.”

I nod and take a deep breath. “Got it.”

“Kate,” he says, and I look over at him. “Be careful.”

“I will be,” I reassure him and then gently start to guide Hermioneigh into the river.

We move slowly, her legs taking small sure steps. “That’a girl,” I murmur, guiding her in. “That’s it.”

I give the cattle a wide berth, putting about ten feet between where they cross and where we do, making sure to follow all the instructions I’ve been given. Levi watches on the side. The water comes up around Hermioneigh’s legs and then up mine, until it’s rushing around my hips and only Hermioneigh’s head is sticking out. Thankfully, we aren’t going much further today once we’re across the river. I’ll chafe like a motherfucker otherwise.

I try not to think about the things that must be in the water as it rushes by us. I can feel the pull to the right downriver, but Hermioneigh takes slow sure steps, her hooves moving along the rocks on the river bed.

“Good girl,” I tell her. “We’ve got this. Halfway there now.”

And that’s where our good luck ends.

“Fuck!” Dakota shouts. “Log! Split the cows! Get out of the water!”

My eyes widen. What the fuck does that mean? Where do I go?

“Kate! Get out of the water!” Levi shouts. “Get out now!”

I move the reins, ready to usher us out of the water, but I never get the chance. Whatever splitting the cows means, the herd I’d given so much space too suddenly swells toward me. They moo in distress, trying to put distance between themselves and whatever’s coming. They split just in time for me to see it. It’s not just a log tumbling along the water.

It’s a whole ass tree trunk.

Hermioneigh rears up at the sight of it as it approaches us too fast to do much of anything.

“Go!” I cry, shaking the reins, but the moment she stands on her hind legs, I start to slide. The leather of my saddle is wet. I’m wet. There’s not much grip. I try my best to hold onto the reins, but my grip isn’t nearly as good as it should be. I slide off right into the river.

I scream just before my head goes under and I feel the full pull of the Green River. Water goes up my nose, but I try my best not to inhale water. I kick my legs, my boots heavy on my feet. It’s just deep enough that I can’t stand with my head above water, and even if I could, the strength of the river itself would sweep me off my feet.

The surface breaks for a split second and I drag in a great gulp of air and scream, hoping someone can see me.

“Kate!” I hear just before I go back under.

Beneath the water, it’s a different world. You’d think it would be silent, but the river is rushing so fast, all I hear is the roar of that in my ears. I struggle to get back above surface, knowing no one can save me if they can’t see me. My lungs start to ache, and I know I’m dangerously close to passing out if I don’t get above the water now. I kick and my boot connects against something large. I don’t know what it is, but it propels me up and above the surface where I can drag in a large breath. Only to lose it when I slam against a large log along the side.

I cry out at the pain, but latch onto the tree trunk barely hanging on the bank in the river. It’s caught a lot of different debris, all clinging to the log and making it shake with the force of the current. I loop my elbow around it and hang on for dear life, the water pulling at my clothes and threatening to sweep me away. I don’t know how far I’ve gone, but it must have been pretty far because it takes Levi a minute more to appear up on the bank on his side-by-side, his expression more panicked than I’ve ever seen him. I’m at the end of the log, out at the furthest point in the water, and I know it won’t be easy to get to me.

“Hang on, Kate!” he growls as he jumps from his side-by-side and rushes to the river bank, his eyes tracing the details, searching for a way to come out to me. “I’m gonna come get you.”

“Be careful,” I croak, my voice raw from when I swallowed some of the river water. “The log’s unsteady.”

Sure enough, when Levi tries to take a step onto the log, it wobbles in the water, so he backs off. He’s too heavy.

“Can you make your way to me along the log?” he asks, his eyes searching for a solution.

I shake my head, my wet hair plastered against my scalp. “The water’s too strong. It’ll rip me away if I let go.”

He hesitates, his eyes on me. For a second, it feels like he’s not gonna help me, like he can’t see a way to save me. I don’t want to die. Fuck, I don’t want to die.

“Please,” I rasp, thinking he needs more convincing. “Please.”

He looks behind him, as if searching for Wiley and Dakota but they’re probably still coming. The side-by-side is faster than the horses and they likely will need to make sure the cows are taken care of first. His face twists before he jerks off his hat and tosses it to the side. He kicks off his boots and pulls his shirt over his head, leaving himself in only his jeans.

“I’m gonna come get you,” he says, before easing up to the side of the river. “Don’t let go.”

“I won’t,” I croak, holding on tightly. My arms are starting to ache, and I don’t know how much longer I can hold on, but I’ll be damned if I give up now.

He eases into the water and hooks his arms around the log. It wobbles dangerously and he pauses for a second to make sure it doesn’t loosen. When it stays where it’s at, he eases in deeper, the water shoving him against the trunk. Only once he’s about halfway out do Wiley and Dakota appear on their horses, their expressions as panicked as Levi’s is.

“What the fuck are you doin’?” Dakota snarls. “You idiot! You’re gonna get you both killed!”

“Rope!” Wiley says, leaping off his horse. “Grab the rope just in case.”

I don’t know if they plan on lassoing us, but I remain focused on Levi as he comes out slowly toward me.

“Hermioneigh?” I ask over the thundering water, worried she got swept down the river, too.

“Safe,” Wiley yells, quickly unraveling his rope and getting it ready.

My feet aren’t touching the bottom and when Levi gets about three quarters of the way to me, I know his aren’t either. If the log gives away now, we’ll both be swept down the river. I cling tighter even if my hands are starting to slip, even if my grip is starting to fail.

“I’ve got you,” Levi pants, dragging himself along the log. “Just hold on.”

So I do. Because he asks me to. Despite the river dragging at me and threatening to suck me under the log, I hold on. More cowboys arrive to help, each trying to find a way to get us back to land without putting anyone else in danger, but I don’t focus on them. I focus on Levi as he pulls himself along the log, as he grunts against the force of the river. His muscles bulge as he pulls himself, his body tense.

He grabs onto the log right next to me and hauls himself to me. “I’m gonna wrap my arm around you,” he grunts. “You gotta let go of the log and wrap around me.”

“You’re sure?” I rasp, nervous to let go.

“I’m not going to let you go anywhere,” he reassures me. “I’ve got you, princess.”

He loops one arm around the branch I’d been clinging to and locks his grip there before he wraps his other around my waist. Beneath the water, his legs wrap around my legs as an added safety net for the transition.

“Okay,” he breaths. “On three, let go and wrap your arms around me.” At my nod, he tightens his grip. “One. . . two. . . three.”

I let go and immediately the river pulls at me. Despite being fast, it tries its best to sweep me away. Instead, I rely on Levi’s strength and wrap around him like a spider monkey, my arms wrapping around his neck and my legs around his waist when he moves his legs. He only moves once he’s sure I have a good hold of his neck.

“Good,” he growls. “Now don’t you dare let go.”

And then he turns and starts to drag us back along the log slowly. For a second, I think things are going to be okay, that we’re gonna make it. He’d grabbed me. I’m wrapped around him so tightly, I’m probably bruising him. He saved me. We’re gonna be okay.

“Log!” someone shouts and Levi curses. “Get them out!”

Those along the bank start to panic and that’s what has me panicked.

“Don’t look at them,” Levi says as he positions me with my back to the log we’re holding onto. “Look at me. I’ve got you. Good girl.”

I wrap myself tighter around him and focus on his face, on the way his brows furrow as he uses pure strength to drag us along the log, but we’re too far from the bank.

“Levi!” Wiley shouts. “There’s a log!”

We have all of three seconds before it reaches us.

There’s nowhere to go, nowhere to run to. Levi instead positions me against the log we’re clinging to with his back against the rushing river. He tells me to unwrap my legs from his waist and instead wrap them around one of his legs.

“Look at me, princess,” he says, but with the river rushing around us, it sounds like his whispers.

Our eyes meet and hold. We’re both wet, our hair hanging around us in wet strands, the river pulling at us. And then movement behind him draws my gaze away.

The log coming for us isn’t a small one. It’s just as big as the one we cling to.

“Levi,” I rasp, my eyes wide.

“Look at me,” he growls. “And don’t look away.”

So I do. I meet his eyes and hold and try not to focus on the log coming for us.

“I’ve got you,” he says, just before the log reaches us.

It slams into Levi’s back, and he grunts in pain, his hold around me weakening so suddenly, I have to scramble to hold on tighter, so I don’t get pulled away.

“Levi!” I cry as he starts to slip.

His pained eyes meet mine, his muscles spasming as he’s shoved against me and the log we’re on starts to violently shake. It’s going to give way. I know it. Levi knows it. The log at his back may be slowly turning, but it hit just hard enough to break more of our log’s hold. And Levi’s back! He’d taken the hit in the same spot from his accident!

He suddenly shoves me up and out of the water despite his failing strength. He grimaces in pain and I know the log must have hit something bad in his back, but he still shoves me up and out of the water, onto the log. I don’t know where the strength comes from now. I can feel his weakness in his hands as he shoves at me, as if he’s using what’s left to get me out.

“Get to the side,” he growls. “You’re light enough.”

“But what about you?” I cry, clinging to him. “I’m not leaving you!”

“Kate, go!”

“Fuck you! I’m not going!” I snarl, before looking over at the bank. “Wiley! The rope!”

He hadn’t been able to throw it before while we were mostly in the water. The river would have swept it away, but now that I’m up on the log, we should be able to reach it before it gets tangled in all the branches. Wiley spins his lasso and tosses it out to me. My fingers nearly miss it as it slips into the water, but I manage to grab it before it gets sucked under completely or tangled. I loop it around Levi’s shoulders quickly, trying not to fall from the log.

“Let me put it underneath your arms.”

“I can’t,” he grunts, his arms shaking. “I can’t hold on. If I move now, I’ll be swept away.”

“You can and you will!” I order, reaching into the water to work the roper further down. “Pull one arm out.”

“Kate—”

“Do it!” I snarl, working it down under one arm. The log shakes violently as I move, and I have to hold on tightly with my other hand. “Now the other one.”

“Get to the side!” he snarls, but he still does what I say, working the rope down despite his loss of strength. “The log, Kate!”

Something cracks and we both look toward the bank where the log is starting to come away. I have just enough time to throw myself at Levi and wrap around him before the log gives way completely and the river sweeps it further out. The rope goes loose and then snaps tightly, tightening around Levi’s rip cage. He yells out in pain, but he doesn’t let me go. He wraps his arms and legs around me as those on the bank start to pull us in. It takes all of them and every bit of muscle they have, but they get us to the side of the bank before they reach in for us. Someone wraps under my armpits and lifts me up and out. They pull out Levi next, dragging him. He shouts again in pain as they position him on the side.

“Your back!” I cry, scrambling over to him. “Levi!”

“I’m fine,” he growls, but it’s not in anger. It’s because he’s clenching his teeth against the pain. “I’m just going to be in a bind for a few days. That log hit me right in my sweet spot.”

I trace my fingers over the scars along his abdomen. “Medicine? Do you have medicine with you?”

He nods. “In the cooler of the side-by-side.”

I rush over to the side-by-side as Wiley and Dakota take over. I flip open the first cooler and find drinks, so I close it and open the other one, rummaging through it until I find a Ziploc bag with medicine bottles in it. I rush back over and open it, falling to my knees beside him.

“Which one?”

Levi grimaces. “The one with a blank lid. Give me two.”

“Do we need to call an ambulance?” someone asks.

“Not for me,” Levi growls. “Check Kate over.”

“I’m fine,” I argue. “Just a bunch of bruises.”

“You’re bleeding on your arm,” Wiley points out.

I look down and blink in surprise to find I am actually bleeding from a deep scratch there. “It’s just a scratch,” I counter. “I’ll be okay.”

“Come on,” Dakota growls. “Let’s get you two up.”

Everyone fuses over us as they help us up and get us into the side-by-side. Levi is worse off than I am, his limp more pronounced than ever as they help him into the seat. He winces in pain as they move him, but he doesn’t complain. Dakota forces me into the side-by-side with him.

“You ride in there with him,” he orders, his voice serious, but I can still see the panic in his eyes.

“We’re okay,” I remind him and touch his forearm.

He leans in and presses his forehead against mine, his eyes closing for a moment. I can feel his pain, his anxiety, the horror he doesn’t show anyone. From anyone on the outside, he looks as stoic and in control as ever.

“We’re okay,” I whisper again, and he nods before pulling back.

“Come on, everyone. Excitement’s over. We’ve got a drive to tend to,” he says, but his eyes linger on me and Levi as Levi adjusts himself and starts the side-by-side.

“You good?” I whisper, not wanting Dakota to hear. After all, I’d just told him we were fine, no matter if my body is screaming at me and my boots are still full of water.

“No,” he whispers back honestly. “But I will be.”

“I’m sorry about your back,” I murmur, guilt starting to eat its way into me. “Thank you for saving me.”

He glances at me. “You didn’t think I’d let you die, did you?”

“I just. . . I saw your hesitation,” I murmur, looking down so I don’t have to see it in his eyes.

He grabs my chin so roughly, it surprises me. He jerks my face toward him, forcing me to look him in the eyes.

“I’m not the man I once was, princess,” he growls. “I’m broken in many ways, but my physical state gets in the way of many things. The hesitation wasn’t for you. It was for me because I wasn’t sure how capable I was of saving you.” He presses his lips roughly against mine in a kiss that feels more desperate than sweet. “If it means you get to live, I’ll break my back a thousand times over, again and again. Remember that.”

And then he releases my chin and puts the side-by-side in gear, dismissing the emotions that had been flowing from his eyes.

I sit there, surprised, awe struck, and a little terrified of what Levi will do to keep me safe.

How can I ever protect him the same in return?