Chapter 16

Chase

I swing the door open and frown when I find a red-in-the-face Liam on my front porch, his eyes wide and his lips a tight line. He briefly eyes my loose bathrobe and my mussed hair before squinting and shaking his head like I've shocked him with my disheveled appearance. "Prepare to defend yourself, mother fucker."

I step back, and it's my turn to be confused. "What?" I ask, running my hand down day-old scruff.

"Let's go," he says with a shrug. "We have business."

"I can't deal with any work shit now. I've had a rough couple of days."

"This is personal." Liam gestures to my yard. "Outside. Now. "

I look behind me like there may be someone in my living room that he's talking to. When I face him again, I find him tapping his foot, his jaw set.

"What is this?" I ask again. "Why are you pissed at me?"

"I'm here to kick your ass into next Tuesday." He holds up his hands. "Don't get me wrong. I still owe you for saving my life, you're my best friend, and you're my partner who's always had my back. But I have to kick your ass because you did a shitty thing to my girl's best friend, and if I don't kick your ass, I'm going to have to explain why I didn't beat the shit out of you to Lorelei. It was either me coming to handle business or she was going to come over and disconnect your balls from your body." He makes a come here motion with his fingers. "Just take your pounding so I can tell her it's done and she won't hurt either of us."

"Should I be scared of her?"

"Terrified, man. She will take your balls."

"She's taken yours," I mumble, bracing my arms on my doorframe.

Liam turns his head like he wants me to speak louder. "What the fuck did you say?"

"Nothing, nothing. I didn't say anything about your new girlfriend carrying your balls around in her purse." I take two steps off my front porch. "Alright. Let's get this over with. I deserve it. "

"You know you did a shitty thing?" Liam asks, putting his fists up like we're going to box.

"Yeah," I say. I look around at the grass and nod. "What I did was shitty, and I don't know how to fix it. I was shocked, to say the least. Go ahead and hit me. Hell, man, pound me into the dirt."

"You're taking the fun right out of this." He raises his fists again and steps toward me. "Where do you want it?"

"Thank you for asking me what part of my face I want you to fuck up. Very charitable of you." I sigh and point to my chin. "Here, but don't bust any teeth because I want veneers, and it will be a good chance to make you pay for them. Since we're best friends, I feel like I should tell you that."

Liam gives a short nod and then swings. I squint before his fist connects with my chin, but not looking at him when he throws a punch doesn't dull the pain that floods my face. My jaw clicks, and I move it around for a second to make sure it's not broken as I stumble into my mailbox.

"What the fuck? You actually hit me!" I yell, spit dripping out of my mouth because I really wasn't ready for the punch.

"I wasn't fucking kidding!" he yells back.

He offers me his hand to help me stand upright, but I slap it away. "Fuck off. I'm going through some shit right now, and my best friend comes over and hits me?"

"I warned you first and asked you where you wanted it! You think I was going to give you a love tap? And why the fuck is Kailee at my house right now and crying about you getting her pregnant and acting like a complete shithead?"

"Because I got her pregnant and then acted like a complete shithead!" I yell.

The neighbor across the street, Edna Glasgow, opens her screen door. She's carrying her little, white dog, and she shuffles onto her porch, adjusting her glasses and holding an old flip phone from the turn of the century. I wave at her and turn Liam so he sees we have an audience.

He gives an awkward wave when he sees her on the porch. "Good afternoon, ma'am," he says. He gestures between us. "Just having a conversation with Chase."

"I saw you hit that young man!" she yells with a shaky voice from across the street. She crooks a gnarled finger at Liam and shakes it. "I'm going to call the police on you."

Liam reaches into his back pocket and pulls out his badge. He casually flips it open. "I am the police, ma'am." He points to me. "He is, too. He's just acting like an idiot, so I had to knock some sense into him. Partner stuff. You understand?"

"Partner stuff, huh?" She sniffs and clutches her dog closer. "Didn't know he was like that. He doesn't put that rainbow flag out in June or anything."

"Shit," I whisper under my breath. I pinch my nose in irritation and immediately grunt from the pain. My whole face hurts.

"You don't be abusive to your partner, now. I don't care which way your bologna is buttered. I know the rate of domestic violence with police officers and their lovers. I saw it on the news." Edna wags her fingers at Liam like she's scolding a toddler. "You watch it, son. If there's a bruise on him, I'll call your superior."

She backs into her house and glares at us from behind the screen door as Liam and I stare at her.

I don't know what to say to the fact that Liam and I were just accused of being two gay police officers involved in a violent domestic dispute, and Liam's silence tells me he doesn't either. Finally, I blow Edna a kiss. "Thank you, queen! You've always been my favorite neighbor."

"What the fuck are you doing?" Liam asks under his breath, his eyes wide and staring at the lawn near his feet.

"That was nice of her to look out for me like that. Maybe you'll think twice about hitting me again. And there's nothing wrong with being in love with me, Liam. You could do worse. Hell, we used to pick up women together. You have done worse. Lorelei excluded."

"Get in the house so we can talk without neighbor interruption."

I hold up my hands and walk back to the door. "Fine. You're the one who called me to the front yard anyway."

I march into the house and cringe at the sight of my own filth. Liam's never seen my house like this, and he gasps behind me as he steps through the door .

Two pizza boxes are on the floor, pistachio ice cream drips down the paper container onto my coffee table, and three beer cans are on their sides on my couch. Tissues are everywhere. This place either looks like a woman was just dumped and then watched Beaches on repeat or a teenage boy ran out of socks.

"Have you been crying?"

I put my hands on my hips and jut out my freshly bruised chin. "Wouldn't you?"

"If I found out I was going to be a father? No."

"Just out of curiosity, what would your reaction be if Lorelei told you she's pregnant?" I ask.

He smiles a wry grin and flushes. "I would pick her up and kiss every inch I could reach. I would run around the room crying tears of joy and then probably go over to my work lover's house with cigars and a bottle of whiskey."

I throw a pillow at him and plop on my couch. He sits in the leather chair across from me and props his chin in his hands. "Why did you react that way?" he asks.

"I'm scared, Liam. It was like an out-of-body experience. I've been shot at, almost lost you, and we've dealt with some bad mother fuckers, but I've never felt as shocked and scared as I did when she said she's pregnant. I was literally floating above my body and watching everything. I waited while my brain tried to catch up with my balls because my balls immediately knew something was wrong, but I couldn't handle it. I was still frozen in so much fear that I opened my mouth and said stupid shit. Then, my legs wanted to run, and I'm not just talking about going for a jog. They wanted away. I felt like I could run a marathon just from fear."

"So, you left her there without saying a fucking word?"

"I think I said I couldn't handle it." I look at Liam, pleading. "But I didn't mean the baby. I meant the conversation right then, but my brain…" I trail off and wave my hand near my head. "My brain shut down, and all my words came out wrong." I inhale a deep breath. "Is she OK? Is she still bleeding?"

"It's stopped. She seems to be OK. No pain and no more blood." He looks around the room and wipes his face. "You have to fix this."

I lean back and cross my arms over my chest. "I know, but I don't want to fuck it up again." I look at my feet propped on my coffee table. "She's pretty upset, huh?"

Liam tilts his head, studying me. "Can you handle the baby?"

"I don't know, and I don't know if she wants me to."

"Are you going to be there for her?"

I grit my teeth. "What in our friendship would make you think I would leave her to this by herself? But she'd have to let me help, Liam. Fuck, I've done nothing but want to be with her since I met her. She ran out on me after we fucked – after I got her pregnant, I guess – and now I'm wondering if she's only been nice to me the last couple of weeks because she felt guilty and needed to tell me she's carrying my baby. I'd like to sit and talk with her about it. I've tried texting her a hundred times today but pussed out every time. Would she even talk to me?"

"Want my advice?" he asks.

"What? No more ass kicking?"

He shakes his head and smirks. "I'd never do anything to hurt you, sweetheart." I glare at him, and his smile slides off his face. "You need to fix it, and you need to find your balls. Those are the hairy things under your dick."

"My balls are smooth and pretty," I whisper. I idly pick up my melting ice cream and swish green liquid around the container as I think. "The thing is, Liam, I'm scared."

"I know. It's a big deal to become someone's father."

"But I'd suck it up for her. Want to know why I'm scared?"

"Tell me."

"Because I'm powerless. It's like being put into a runaway train car, and you're not sure whether to do a tuck and roll out the caboose or hold on tight and hope everything turns out OK."

"Funny that you've figured out this father thing already."

"I can't do anything for her right now, you know? No matter what I think or feel, she's the one who is sick and scared and going to have to push something the size of a watermelon out of something the width of the average churro, and I don't know the right thing to say to support her."

"How about, ‘Hey, Kailee. I'm here.' Then, you hug her tight, stroke her hair, and tell her you'll support whatever choice she makes." He stops and stares at the wall behind me, probably thinking of more advice. "You should also throw in a forehead kiss. Women love those."

"I would do all those things for her. But then I'll wait on pins and needles to see what she decides."

Liam wipes his forehead like he's annoyed at me. He leans back and stretches his long legs out on my coffee table. "So wait on pins and needles until she tells you what to do. But you need to apologize first and tell her you will wait for her direction."

"I know. I'll tell her at work tomorrow."

"She won't be there."

I lift my head. "Did she quit?"

Liam coughs out a laugh. "Yeah, a single pregnant woman is going to quit the job she needs." He shakes his head. "She's got a doctor's appointment. She needed one anyway, so she's going tomorrow."

I look at the floor again and chew on my cheek, thinking. "Where's the doctor's appointment?"