11. First Date Jitters

Chapter 11

First Date Jitters

Noah

Gabriel wasn’t going to like that I was throwing caution to the wind, but I decided that I didn’t care. I’d had every intention of using the gifts to get into Jade’s good graces, so we could discuss our exit strategy, but that flew right out the car window on my drive home.

LA traffic was at least good for something.

I wasn’t planning on breaking Jade’s heart, so William Dalton dropping Badden Apparel was a non-issue. If anything, I was more nervous about her breaking my heart. Not that my heart had any involvement... yet.

But, then, why was I so nervous to go on a date?

I’d been on plenty of dates before, but never with a woman I wanted to impress. It was rare that I had to put in any effort, but Jade had her guard up, and I needed to bring my A-game.

I ran a hand through my hair one last time, making sure it was perfectly tousled. My beard was trimmed close to my face after a solid thirty minutes of contemplating the clean-shaven look. Since my chin scratch was completely healed now, there was really no reason for me to keep it long. I wanted to look more mature but not like a mountain man. Well, unless Jade dug the mountain-man look.

Maybe I was overthinking this.

Climbing out of my car, I smoothed my hand down my gray short-sleeved Henley and brushed off some random cat hairs on my dark jean-clad thighs. How the hell did cat hair get on my jeans?

After grabbing the bouquet of different hues of pink carnations, I walked to Jade’s door. Were the flowers too much? I’d gotten her flowers before, but those weren’t date flowers. Date flowers meant something.

Shaking my head, I rang her doorbell and rocked back on my heels. When she opened the door a moment later, I nearly forgot how to breathe.

She looked powerful and confident with her curve-hugging, black high-waisted jeans, red top, and heels. They were definitely “fuck me” heels and brought her almost to my height. She wasn’t short, by any means, but they gave her three or four inches. Her hair was down in soft waves, and her green eyes popped from whatever she’d done with her eye makeup.

“Wow.” There were really no other words .

She bit her lip and looked me up and down. “You don’t look so bad yourself, Badden.”

I grinned and held out the bouquet. “These are for you.”

Surprise flickered across her face as she took them, a smile tugging at her lips. “Thank you, they’re beautiful. Let me put them in water really quick. You can come in if you want.”

She turned and headed into the kitchen, disappearing into what I assumed was the pantry. I stepped inside her house, shutting the door so Captain, who was sitting on the couch staring at me, didn’t make a run for it.

I took a moment to take a few calming breaths. I really could have used a pep talk from my brothers, but Gabriel would have just laid into me, and Lex never took anything seriously. My other friends were all just like Lex, so there was no way in hell I was telling them.

My dad was always an option, but he would tell my mom, and then she’d make a big deal out of it. Probably would start asking about grandbabies before I even went on a second date.

Captain stood and stretched before jumping off the couch. He headed straight for me, and I couldn’t tell if he was coming to be petted or to warn me off his mom.

I squatted down, hoping he didn’t decide to swipe at my face again. “How’s my best bud?”

Surprisingly, when I held out my hand, he went right under it, letting it run down his body. He meowed and rubbed up against my knee.

“I think he forgot that you chased him and called him an asshole.” Jade placed her flowers in the center of her island and grabbed her purse. “How did you know carnations were my favorite?”

I stood, leaving Captain to rub against my leg. “I saw them at the farmer’s market this morning and thought of you.”

“It’s been a while since I’ve been. Do you sell your vegetables there?” She followed me out the front door and locked it behind her.

“No, I give most of my extras to my brothers and people at work. You should come with me next weekend. They have some great breakfast stalls.” My stomach growled at the mere thought of food.

“Maybe.” Her arm brushed mine as we walked to my car.

I opened the passenger door and gestured for her to get in. “Tell me, Jade. Are you a keyboard?” Before she could answer, I shut her door and jogged around to my side and got in.

“Uh... a keyboard?” She looked confused as I buckled up and started the engine. “Are you going to tell me you want to pound me? Because if so, I’m out of here.”

She reached to unbuckle her seat belt, and I put my hand over hers. Her eyes met mine, and she sucked in a breath. I was glad to see I wasn’t the only one affected.

“You’re just my type.” I brought her hand up to my lips, kissing the back of it. “But pounding you is a good line too.”

She rolled her eyes and pulled her hand away. “You’re ridiculous.”

I backed down her driveway. “I can stop if you really don’t like it. Just say the word.”

“You don’t have to stop; I wasn’t really going to leave.” She ran her hands over her thighs, the movement drawing my eyes to her legs.

Focus.

As we pulled out of our neighborhood, I glanced over at her. “How’s the new house treating you?”

Jade leaned her head back against the seat. “It’s good, for the most part. It’s just a lot of space.”

“I thought that too when I moved into my house a few years ago, but you’ll grow into it. Keeping it clean is the hardest part.” Even though I had someone come once a week, I still didn’t like to leave messes everywhere.

“Don’t get me wrong, I love it, but it can feel a little isolating sometimes. I’m farther from work, farther from Noelle... It’s not even like I had friends in my apartment building or have much of a life outside of work, but there were always people around, you know?” She fiddled with the strap of her purse. “Sorry, I’m rambling.”

“I get it. Moving is a big transition, but for what it’s worth, I think it’s awesome that you bought your own house by yourself.”

“Thanks. It’s been a goal for a while. I just wasn’t sure if I was ready until recently.”

“Well, I’m really glad you did. It has some pretty great amenities, like a hot neighbor who will give you all the zucchini you could ever want.” I wiggled my eyebrows suggestively.

Jade smacked my arm, but she was laughing. “I don’t even really like zucchini all that much.”

I gasped, clutching my chest in mock horror. “I think you just broke my heart. How can you not like zucchini? It’s like the chicken of the vegetable world. It deserves its own museum or maybe even a tasteful oil painting in the dining room... or my bedroom.”

“The ladies will love that. Nothing like staring at a giant zucchini while you’re getting railed by one.” Her eyes widened, and she clapped her hand over her mouth like she hadn’t meant for that to come out.

I laughed. “There’s my girl.” I rested my arm on the console with my palm facing up.

Was this dating thing with someone you really liked supposed to be so damn awkward yet not at the same time? She made me feel completely at ease and free to be myself, but while I waited to see if she took my hand, I felt like a kid waiting for his girlfriend to show up at the monkey bars.

Jade stared at my hand for a few seconds before taking it. Inwardly I whooped with joy, but outwardly I had to play it cool—I didn’t want to scare her with my excitement.

The rest of the drive to the restaurant, we held hands and talked about our weeks. She didn’t seem to do much besides work, and I wondered if that was normal for her. She had a CEO to run her business, but she spoke like she was in that role and had to be there twelve hours a day. Maybe she just didn’t trust anyone to do a good enough job.

Being the owner, or even part owner, of a company came with a lot of responsibility but also a lot of freedom. Though my brother Gabriel had spent a lot of time working before his daughter lived with him, now he worked normal hours like the rest of us.

I pulled into the restaurant parking lot, and we held hands as we walked to the entrance. Whatever had changed between her ignoring me all week and today was welcomed. Was it the sex toys? Was she wearing one or both of them?

A man could dream.

The restaurant I picked was a nice steakhouse that Gabriel always talked about. The tables and booths were far enough apart for privacy, and the dim lighting and flameless candles on the tables added a touch of romance.

As we followed the hostess, I rested my hand on the small of Jade’s back, unable to resist the urge to touch her. She didn’t seem to mind, so I kept it there until I pulled her chair out for her.

“I’ve heard about this place but have never been.” Jade took her menu from the hostess as I sat across from her. “It’s pretty nice.”

I opened my menu, my mouth already watering. “You do like steak, right?”

“I’m actually a vegetarian.” She was staring at her menu, but I caught her lips fighting a smile.

“A vegetarian who only eats bacon?”

She looked up, a bit surprised. “You remember what I had for brunch?”

“French toast with two eggs over easy, hash browns, and bacon, crispy but not burnt. Oh, and bottomless mimosas. Can’t forget those.” I winked, and she gave me a sheepish look, as if she was remembering last weekend too.

Her gaze dropped briefly to my lips. “I can’t believe you remember my exact order.” She looked back down at her menu, her cheeks appearing a little pinker.

“Why not? You don’t remember mine?” If she said she didn’t, I was going to be gutted .

She pushed her hair behind her ear. “Eggs Benedict.”

“See? Completely normal to remember your crush’s order.”

She closed her menu and gave me a serious look, her eyes the color of emeralds in the flickering candlelight. “You make me nervous.”

I really hoped she meant that in the “butterflies in the stomach” way and not the “he might be a serial killer” way. “How so?”

“I can’t tell if you’re serious or if you’re just trying to get me into bed. Honestly, it’s been so much of the latter that my head automatically goes there.” She had tears in her eyes, and I wanted to go punch all the men who had caused her to feel like that.

Thankfully, the waiter appeared, giving me a minute to choose my words carefully. I could see how she might think I only wanted her body, but I wanted so much more. It was completely uncharted territory for me.

After ordering, we sat in silence for a few moments before I reached my hand across the table. When she took it, I blew out a relieved breath.

“I know it might seem like that’s the only thing I’m after, but I’m not. Am I incredibly attracted to you? I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t, but from the second you took your cat’s side over mine…” I smiled. “While infuriating, it also demonstrated how far you’re willing to go to protect someone you love. And then there’s your feistiness, the silliness you try to hide, the way you speak from your heart about your passion.”

She hesitated, her lips twisting to the side. “Then why did you buy those gifts for me? ”

Damn it. I’d never even considered how the gifts might be misconstrued.

I rubbed my thumb over her knuckles, hoping she could read my sincerity. “You were ignoring me, and I needed to get your attention. Since I saw your toy collection and witnessed the pleasure it brought you, I just thought it would be a nice gift. It worked, didn’t it?”

“It did.” Her head tilted to the side as she stared at me, looking like she was trying to read my mind. “What now? You want to date me for real?”

“If that’s something you also want.” I didn’t think my heart could take it if she rejected me after holding my hand in the car, walking into the restaurant, and now at the table. Not that I was keeping track.

“I’m not entirely sure what I want,” she whispered, the vulnerability in her voice louder than her words.

“Then we just have fun. Sex or no sex. Date or no date.” What the hell was I saying? I wanted to date this woman. And, as much as I respected the business she’d built from the ground up, I longed to bring her the type of pleasure and intimacy only another person could bring. “We go at your pace. You want to be celibate? I can be celibate.”

I could handle this, right? If I wanted her, I was going to have to let her run the show. I’d regret it if I didn’t do all I could to see where things would take us.

She snorted. “When was the last time you had sex?”

“A few months ago, unless you count what we did last weekend. When was the last time you had sex?”

“A year ago.” She sighed and pulled her hand away, her shoulders slumping, like the mere thought of it was too heavy. “He was cheating on me.”

“Ah.” Now things were starting to make sense. Between the asshole at the gala and her ex, she didn’t have any reasons to put her trust in a man. “That’s his loss and my gain. I’d cut my balls off before doing that to a woman. In fact, give me his name and address, and I’ll cut off his balls.”

She was taking a sip of her water and nearly spit it out. “Enough about that. Tell me something no one else knows about you.”

There were so many things... Sometimes I did Zumba for my cardio, I was the only Badden brother who sucked at sports, and I once ate so many hot Cheetos that I ended up in urgent care. “I love to bake.”

Jade’s brows lifted. “I didn’t peg you as a baker. Then again, I would have never guessed you loved to garden, either.”

“It’s a hobby I picked up in college to de-stress. It’s not something I advertise, because my brothers would give me a lot of shit if they knew the extent of it. I’m talking seven-layer cakes, fully decorated with homemade frosting.”

“Who gets to enjoy your baked creations then?”

I shrugged. “Simple things I’ll take into work, but usually I just take what I don’t eat to that assisted living facility that’s right outside our community.”

“You’re making it hard not to like you. And your secret is safe with me. I’ll be expecting baked goods now, though.”

“I tried to give you chocolate zucchini bread. It was damn good too, even if you don’t like zucchini. What’s your favorite dessert? ”

“I’m not big on desserts, but if I had to choose, it would be a chocolate chip cookie right out of the oven. What’s yours?”

“Chocolate zucchini bread.”

She threw her head back and laughed. “I should have seen that coming.”

It was taking all my willpower not to lean across the table and kiss her senseless.