11. Chapter 11

"You're officially done with the Army, so explain to me again why you can't come home. Your mother is worried sick."

"Dad, I told you that the police department here recruited me before the ink was even dry on my discharge. Thanks to my background in the military, I've been given the opportunity to take the exam and become a detective."

"Son." Dad sighed that one word like my decision was the end of the world. "We have a police department here," he finally mentioned as an alternative.

"I understand that, but they're not going to offer me the same deal. They'll want me to start from scratch as a beat cop. I've already done that and put in the work to move up. Taking a step backward isn't what I want. Maybe, after I get some time in here, I can move closer to home and not have to worry about backsliding in my career."

"Are you at least ever going to come home to visit?" He asked, sounding worn down by our conversation already, even though we'd only been on the phone for five minutes.

"I'm starting a new job right away. That means building up time off before I can come home. It'll be a while, but I promise to get back as soon as I can."

My father sighed. The fact that I hadn't been back since leaving for the Army was a point of contention for my family. I missed them, and I know they missed me. The problem was that going home didn't feel like an option. Maybe it was fear holding me back, or the fact that I'd simply outgrown the small town, but it felt as though I'd be trapped there forever the minute I set foot in town again. I didn't want anything to keep me bound there, and my family would try their best to do just that.

There was also the issue of the other person who might make me want to stay. It was one thing to communicate with her through our letters and e-mails, but I didn't think I'd be able to walk away if I saw Posie in person. She would never agree to come back here with me, considering she worked so closely with my brother.

That was yet another reason I couldn't get home. I didn't know if I could handle seeing them so close and chummy. Pops swore up and down that there was nothing between them, but I knew firsthand what happened to people who were attracted to one another and worked closely together. My brother looked enough like me that I knew he was physically desirable to women. And Posie, well, even back when I first noticed her in that barn, there had been something about her.

She'd been waifish, in that she was a tiny thing, but there was a beauty to her features too. I often imagined how she looked now. I purposely avoided pictures of her because I didn't need that kind of temptation.

Pops and Dad were both two very big trees who cast wide shadows. It was hard to step out from under them and make a mark on the world that was my own. I didn't feel like I could do that while living so close to them and Posie was just type who would make it okay to never feel the sun firsthand again.

"Max, I wish you'd talk to me about whatever is keeping you from coming home. Your mom is beginning to worry that we did something to upset you."

"I swear, you guys are fine. I'm just trying to establish a career. She didn't want me in the service any longer, and I listened."

Dad chuckled. "You went from the boiling pot to the frying pan full of scalding oil, son. Being a cop isn't any easier on her nerves, and she thought it meant you'd at least be home to watch her chewing her fingernails off."

It was my turn to chuckle. "I promise, as soon as I have time in my position, I'll start looking for an opening over your way and come closer to home."

"Famous last words, Son. Don't put it off too long," Dad warned. "You never know what you'll be missing out on by hiding out away from home."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Guess if you want to know, you'll have to make an appearance and find out," he teased.

"Guilt doesn't work, so you think you're going to bait me back home with intrigue?" I asked.

"Did it work?"

"Almost."