9. Absolutely Mortified

Nine

Absolutely Mortified

Elena

I stare down at the dress I'm wearing that I bought during my lunch break. It's a far cry from what I usually wear, with spaghetti straps and a hem that falls above my knees. It's no minidress but look out—I'm living life on the edge. I chuckle to myself.

I'm not sure if a dress is appropriate to wear. In my determination to look good for Axle, I didn't consider that a dress may not be practical on the back of a bike. But I can't ask anyone now, and anyway, I want to look and feel sexy. I'm sure he's used to glamorous women. I can't remember a time when I ever felt sexy. Henry made me feel pretty, but never sexy. I slip my sandals on, then stand up straight.

"Oh crap! Oh crap!" I grasp my racing heart. What if Axle wants me to stay the night? I didn't ask about my ride home. I pace. I didn't think this through. The rumble of a motorcycle makes me shriek in panic. I grab a bag and throw in some pajamas. I rush out to the bathroom and grab my toothbrush.

My breathing is out of control as I walk downstairs. Everyone's out, so the house is quiet. I open the front door to go outside. I can do this. I can do this... No, I can't do this . I retreat and start closing the front door.

"Hold up," Axle calls out, pulling the door open wide. "First"—his eyes ravish my body, making me blush—"you look fucking hot, babe. Second, you're not going anywhere. You committed to meeting my friends, so get your sexy self on my bike." He reaches over and takes my hand in his. "I'd never let anyone hurt you." He pulls me in for a brief hug.

I embrace his warmth and feel a sliver of relief. I believe him. He places a gentle kiss on my forehead, making me swoon and smile up at him. My stomach churns with mixed emotions.

When he sees the bag on my shoulder, he asks, with a wicked glint in his eyes, "Staying the night, are you?"

"I didn't know," I stutter out. "We didn't talk about when or how I was getting home."

He chuckles. "It's okay—I get it. You're keen to see me naked."

I scoff and choke at the same time. "That thought never came to my mind. I told you I'm not having sex with you."

He points to the corner of my mouth. "You're drooling just at the thought of it."

I'm tongue-tied before I can even contemplate a response. He lifts his shirt, displaying his fit body. My mouth drops open at the display of muscles. He pulls my hand to the top of his abs and slowly drags it down his torso. His skin is warm and taut. I yank my hand back before it reaches the top of his jeans. It felt so good, but I glare at him while I scold myself. Before I can utter a word, he tips his chin and says, "You loved it," and then kisses the air.

I blow out a breath, puffing out my cheeks. I take a slow step outside, trying to gather my wits about me. I turn and lock the door before we walk to his bike. He's out of control, but I always end up smiling or laughing at him. He's not the typical broody, intimidating biker. With his playful and flirty nature, it's no surprise he's popular with the ladies.

"Excited for your first club party, babe?"

"Hmm... party?" I ask, hoping I misheard him.

"It's just a quiet one, chill out... breathe..."

My heart is in my throat. I feel a storm of emotions swirling inside me. Am I anxious about the party or irritated by his condescending tone? Maybe it's both. My hands tremble slightly, and I catch myself clenching my jaw, trying to mask the frustration that's creeping onto my face. All I wanted to do was casually meet his friends, not be surrounded by drunk people. I don't do parties... ever .

After he gets on his bike, I stay standing. I look at him, his bike, and then the ground. "You're going to keep me safe, aren't you?"

"I've got you," he says soothingly. "I'll be with you the whole night. My friends are good people. You'll see."

I decide to have an exit plan just in case. "I'm only going if I drive my car."

He shrugs. "All good. You can follow me."

I appreciate that he didn't argue the point. He turns the ignition on and the bike roars to life. While I walk toward my car, he calls out, "I knew you wanted to see me naked."

I chuckle as I walk to the car. He's impossible.

As we drive through town, it's mostly quiet. Past the residential area and the shops, he speeds up before veering off on a dirt road. They must live on an acreage. He slows when we reach a huge two-story farmhouse. He leads me through the gate and drives off to the side and into an open shed. When he turns the bike off, there's loud music coming from the house.

There's a light on in the shed, so I can see a line of motorcycles, a big black truck, and a van. I remain in my car just outside the doors. "Where do I park?" I ask as he walks toward me.

"Park it in the shed next to the van."

I give him a cautious glance. Park ... I cringe. Not that there are any lines, but still. "My car won't fit in there."

He walks around the car and opens my door. "Move over."

I take my seat belt off and shuffle over to the passenger seat. When he gets in, I fight back a laugh because he's doing me a favor. He has to just about fold himself in half to fit in my small car and is nearly kissing the dashboard.

He adjusts the seat, closes the door, and shoots me a look that says not to say a word. I press my lips together to hold back my laughter. I relax in my seat as he smoothly maneuvers the car into the parking spot. And there's something sexy about a man who's a confident driver.

"Trust you to have the world's smallest car... and what's this crap?" He gestures toward the speakers.

I huff. "It is not crap. It's Cardi B."

He turns the car off. "It's crap. You listening to rap is funny as hell, though."

Outside the shed, he puts an arm around my shoulders, pulling me to his side, and ushers me toward the house. My pulse skyrockets, and I'm seriously questioning my life choices.

"Tell me if you're going to faint and I'll catch you."

I tsk. He laughs.

"I'm not going to faint." I don't think I am... Well, I hope not.

"I'm just teasing you," he replies with the devilish grin he wears so well.

I peer up at the farmhouse. I'm walking into the lion's den. I lower my head as we walk through the front door. He leads me through a hallway that opens into an open-plan space. I pause, unsure of where to direct my gaze. My heart beats in sync with the heavy beat of the music.

My eyes bounce from one man to another. These guys are not what I'm used to... They're all tall, masculine men wearing similar clothes: jeans, a shirt, and the club vest. I'm not used to this much testosterone. Two intimidating men are playing pool. Further behind them, at the bar, sits a man with black hair, his back to us. A few people are playing darts.

One wall is adorned with a large black flag that bears the same logo that's on the club vests: a skull set over two crossed guns, with "War Brothers MC" written above it. At the rear of the room, a literal motorcycle is recessed in the wall... they really love their motorcycles. My eyes wander further. I squint. Is that...? I squeal and turn on my heel so damn fast.

Axle gently holds my face and raises my head to make eye contact. "What's wrong?"

I blush furiously. "Two people are having sex on the couch." I never imagined I'd say this, but here I am.

"Fuuuck." He looks over to them. "I'll be right back."

"Viper, put your dick back into your pants," he yells over the music.

I wince. I've never wished to fade into the background as much as I do at this moment. The music quietens, and I hear the hum of conversation.

Axle is by my side again. "All good now—he's got his pants on," he says casually, as if having sex in public is normal.

We turn around to face his friends. I keep my eyes closed for a moment before chancing a look.

"I told them to calm it down a bit, but"—he looks up, his eyes fixed on his friend—"it looks like Viper didn't hear me," he says loudly.

"Sorry, man," his friend calls out. The apology sounds half-hearted, more teasing than sincere. I can't even look at his friend Viper now.

Axle drags me over to his friends at the pool table. They both pause and glance between us. Since my body is frozen, all I can manage is a stupid stare. I thought Axle was tall, but the man closest to me is enormous—I'm shorter than his shoulders. "This is Reaper, our president. We call him Reaper or Pres."

Reaper tips his head to me in greeting. "You sure you know what you're getting yourself into with him?" he asks in a deep, rough voice, tilting his head in Axle's direction.

My gaze shifts from Axle to Reaper.

Axle just laughs. "Oh, Pres has got jokes." But Reaper's not laughing.

I kind of wished I'd stayed home. Meeting Axle's friends is a car crash of embarrassment.

The other man has made his way to us. He's good looking, with dark features. His warm smile puts me at ease somewhat. "My name's Cash."

I smile back. "Oh... you're Axle's friend he went to the military with. My name's Elena," I say enthusiastically as I put my hand out. I put my freaking hand out to shake a biker's hand. I could hit my forehead right about now. Cash shakes my hand and I'm grateful he didn't embarrass me, but I don't miss the odd look and raised brow he gives Axle.

"I bet he's keeping you on your toes," Cash says.

"What does that mean?" Axle asks, the accusation clear in his tone.

"That he is," I answer Cash, and he chuckles.

Axle tugs me to the back of the room. "Cash is our treasurer. He's really smart. Manages all our stuff and does whatever a finance person does."

"What's with all the unusual names?" I ask. I watch the man by himself at the bar finish his drink, slam the glass on the counter, and leave. He does not seem happy.

Axle snorts. "Everyone calls each other by their road name, not by their actual name."

I pause. "So your real name's not Axle?"

He chuckles. "That's right."

I'm about to ask what it is, but we reach the dart players. A man wearing a cap that's been turned backward throws a dart and nearly hits the bullseye. "Hell yeah," he chants. When he sees us, he gives us a cheery smile. "Hey, I'm Twitch."

Another player, an attractive woman with long, dark hair, puts an arm around his waist. She gives me a quick up and down glance. "I'm Mercedez."

"Twitch is our security and IT expert," Axle says.

Before I can reply, a heavily tattooed man makes his way over to us. He has a mohawk and an eerie aura that makes me take a step back. I gasp when I see the shine of a blade and watch in horror as he throws his knife at the dartboard, hitting the bullseye.

"And that's Demon, our enforcer," Axle says.

I don't know what that means, and I'm pretty sure I don't want to find out.

Twitch scowls at Demon. "You're a cheat!"

Demon smirks and walks away.

I'm at a loss for words as I stare wide-eyed at the dartboard. Who in their right mind throws a knife near people? He's insane! I plan to keep all my limbs, so I'm staying far away from him.

"My girl here is mute," says Axle, amused.

I playfully shove him. "I am not." I turn to Twitch and Mercedez, say, "Hi," and give them an awkward wave and a tight smile. Why am I incapable of being normal?

Two women off to the side are giving me the death stare. One, her hair in a bob, is dressed classier than her red-haired companion, who is wearing similar clothing—or a lack of clothing—as the other women. I lean closer to Axle. "Who are they?" I ask.

He turns his head, then his eyes narrow. His arm around my shoulder tightens. "They're no one... Come on, let's go get you a drink." He pauses. "You do drink, right, or are you all work and no play?"

"Just one drink," I mutter. I peer back to see both women still glaring at me, looks of disgust on their faces. I exhale noisily. I have no desire to get involved in any drama. Do they not like me or is it because I came here with Axle?

Axle leads me deeper into the house, to the back, where there's a large kitchen. He pulls open the fridge door, leans in, and grabs two small bottles, one with a brightly colored label. He takes the lid off one and hands it to me. The drink is purple. I take a mouthful to ease my nerves.

"See?" Axle's smile is goofy. "I told you it would be fine meeting my friends."

"How was that fine?" I'm mortified. Public sex, knife throwing... not to mention my incessant need to embarrass myself. "This is a quiet night?" What would a big party be then? I don't think I want to be here to find out.

"Don't you give me those judgy eyes."

I cross my arms over my chest and pout. "They are not judgy."

He raises a brow. "Is your cross burning you right now?"

I peer down at my necklace. "What are you talking about?"

"Is it burning you from all your lies?"

I crack a smile at his playfulness. He's got a smart mouth on him. The couple that was shamelessly having sex walk in. They are smiling as they walk toward me. No embarrassment whatsoever. I'm blushing enough for the two of them.

"This is Viper, our vice president," Axle points out.

Viper is handsome and has a beard. He wears the same devilish grin Axle wears. The girl is short and petite like me, sporting the same long blond hair. I thought I was showing a lot of skin in my new dress, but she's wearing short shorts that are undone at the front and a bikini top that barely covers her nipples.

"It's good to meet you. I've heard all about you," Viper says, his voice heavy with inuendo. His eyes slowly drift over me.

The woman steps closer to me with a bright smile. "I'm Candy. You've been the topic of conversation around here."

I peer at Axle. He's waving his fingers in front of his throat, gesturing for her to stop talking. That's rude of him. I bring the bottle to my lips and take another gulp to hide my discomfort. I hate being the topic of conversation.

"You alright?" Viper asks me.

I stiffen, surprised at how observant he is. "Yes, I'm just getting a little tired." Minor lie for the greater good. I need a break. Being with them... it's overwhelming. My introverted self can handle only so much.

Axle takes my drink and sets it on the kitchen counter. "Come on, let's go upstairs."

Viper laughs. "You're going to bed now? The party hasn't even started yet."

In that case, I'm glad we're leaving.

"Whatever my girl wants, she gets."

Axle is smiling down at me with warm eyes, and I melt into a puddle by his feet.

"Your girl..." Viper's voice is loud with disbelief. "So you're together?"

"No," I reply. I like Axle, but I just got out of a relationship and I don't know if Axle could commit.

Axle clicks his tongue. "Not yet," he says, then gives me a wink.

Axle's charm... his humor... his looks... deadly combination. He's trouble with a capital T . It both scares and excites me.

As we pass by the couple, Candy says, "Good night."

I pick up on Viper muttering something about money as we walk by. Axle kisses my temple, looks over his shoulder, and says, "Yeah, you will."

As we leave the kitchen by the opposite door, we pass by a wall decorated with mug shots. I try to look at them, but Axle pulls me closer, encouraging me to walk faster. But then I spot Axle's photo. Even in the picture there's a smugness in his eyes and the slight tilt of his lips.

"Why is your mug shot on the wall? What did you do?"

He lowers his head. "Nothing. Stress less, babe. Keep walking."

As we make our way up the staircase, I gaze down at everyone. Being here is like being in another universe, though I'm not sure what I expected. I spot the motorcycle recessed into the wall again. I shift my eyes to Axle. "Why do you have a motorcycle inside the clubhouse?" It makes no sense.

His shoulders tense and he falls silent. When we reach the top of the stairs, he says, "It was Victor's."

The solemnity of his reply startles me. In a rare moment of vulnerability, his face softens and a frown tugs at his lips. Guilt hits me.

We walk to the end of a hall that's lined with bedroom doors, most of them closed. As he opens one, I say, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry."

He ushers me into the room, closes the door, and gives me a smile that doesn't reach his eyes. "No need to say sorry."

His answer doesn't ease my guilt. He might be all smiles, but when it comes to losing his father figure, he can't mask the hurt in his eyes.

I look around. His room has a navy-blue feature wall. Against it stands his black bed frame, and his bed is made with black bedding. Another War Brothers MC flag hangs on the wall opposite the bed.

Axle is observing me closely. He slips off his leather vest and sets it down on the cabinet below the TV.

My breathing is erratic as he walks toward me. "I'm not having sex with you," I say again, not quite sure who I'm trying to convince at this point.

He laughs. "I know," he says, then grabs his chest as if someone shot him. "No need to keep reminding me, you're going to hurt my feelings."

I scoff. "I highly doubt that."

He fights a smile and sits down. He pulls off his boots, then shuffles over and lies down on his side. I admire his face. That square jaw... those full lips. It's criminal how attractive he is.

He pats the bed beside him. I give him a cautious stare.

"I'm not going to have sex with you," he says, his grin mischievous as he throws my words back at me in the same tone I use. "Unless you want me to," he purrs.

I struggle to hide my smile, but I stay standing. His bed looks daunting... lying down... next to him. After that kiss we shared, I question my self-control. He's watching me, but he's not forcing the issue, so I take a deep breath, though my heart is pounding, and slowly sit, then lie beside him. My breath catches in my throat when he shuffles over, closing the space between us. A blend of anticipation and nervousness ripples through me.

"You're too trusting."

I become rigid and try to sit up, but he pulls me back down.

"You came back to the clubhouse with me... you're in my bedroom. I wouldn't do anything if you didn't want to, but if I was someone different, you could have put yourself in a bad situation."

I turn away and stare at the wall. Am I so desperate for attention and a friendship or connection with someone that I'd trust so blindly?

Axle grasps my chin and turns my face toward his until our eyes meet. "What are you thinking about?"

"Everything is new to me..." I never had the chance to make poor choices. I surrounded myself with like-minded friends and a like-minded boyfriend. We were the quiet, studious group that did well at school and kept to ourselves. "I've never had reason not to trust someone."

Something flashes across his face, then his brow furrows. "Promise me you'll be more careful." He's serious.

"So I should be more careful around you?"

His lip lifts. "Around everyone." His gaze quickly shifts to my lips, then back to my eyes. "But especially around me," he says before he leans down and presses a soft kiss to my shoulder, muting the voices inside my head. He plants a trail of kisses from my collarbone up my neck. A moan slips from my mouth as shivers rack my body.

His lips meet mine, and I'm helpless under his voodoo. I can't fight my attraction to him. My body flares to life, every part of me awakening. He slides his tongue into my mouth, shooting searing need through my body.

He pulls back an inch. "I'm obsessed with the way you taste," he growls, then his mouth is on mine again.

I lift my hand and gently run my fingers through his hair. He leans closer, pressing his weight against me, and an overwhelming need fills my mind. Bliss blankets me, while a deep longing pulses within. Our tongues dance together, and his grip on my hip becomes more insistent, pulling me closer.

He groans and eases back, dragging his teeth over my bottom lip. It's new to me, but the seductive way he did it... I liked it. I'm watching as his head falls back.

We both gasp for oxygen.

"Fuuuck. You can't kiss me like that," he murmurs, though his gaze lingers on my lips, betraying his words. He leans forward slightly, caught between resistance and desire.

I touch my tingling lips. The warmth of his kiss lingers, leaving behind a sensation of longing. I've never felt such desire for anyone... And I've never been kissed so passionately.

His eyes search mine, then his face softens. "I'm poison. You're going to regret meeting me."

Maybe... maybe not. "I'll make up my own mind." He never forced me into anything against my will. I wanted—no, I craved—his lips on mine. "I've enjoyed getting to know you." He's so different.

He lets out a sigh, leans down, and pulls the blanket up over us. "Turn around," he says, his voice still rough.

I roll over and he lies back down, pressing his body against mine. His chest is against my back, his arm encircling my body, cradling me against him. Warm and content, I smile. I shouldn't feel safe, but I do. I should be running away from him with what everyone else is saying, but I can't. I promised myself I'd make up my own mind about everyone I meet. In the short time I've known him, he's evoked emotions in me that I've never experienced before, which only compels me to spend more time with him.

The music from downstairs gets louder. I feel the vibrations from the bass. The voices have risen too. Maybe more people have arrived. My mind goes back to the motorcycle. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure, babe."

"Why is Victor's motorcycle inside?"

He's silent. I wait patiently.

"It's rare. Victor built it himself. I've never been able to bring myself to ride it—it's too important to me. So I asked the club if it could remain in the clubhouse, where it would be close by and I could always keep an eye on it."

He may wear a joker mask, but there's a loving man behind it. He isn't this horrible criminal and player everyone labels him as.

"What's your real name?" I ask.

"Jake."

"Jake," I say, tasting his name on my tongue. "Tell me more about yourself."

"Eh... what do you want to know?"

I pause. "Anything... Why did you steal parts from Victor, and what made you stick around and not go back to what you were doing before he caught you?"

"No one ever cared enough to teach me something. He helped me find something I was good at, and he looked after me."

Oh, my aching heart.

"I stole from him because I needed the money to eat and to help my parents pay the bills, but if I hadn't stolen from Victor, God knows where I would have ended up."

My parents may be unbearable, but I always had a roof over my head, clean clothes, and all the basic necessities. "What do you mean by not knowing where you may have ended up?"

"I was a menace to society." He chuckles. "I broke into people's houses and stole things. When the police found me with the stolen goods, I hopped on my motorbike and they had to chase me around in their vehicle. I loved the chase. To see how long it took them to get me. It happened a few times. I'd go to juvie, then get let back out."

Well, I see nothing has changed apart from the stealing. "And then you went into the military and met Cash?"

"I was angry when Victor died and hated the world, so yeah, I went into the military. Cash was my lifeline and just like me. We weren't in the military for long, though. We went overseas, served, and did our time, and that was enough for us. I think we're lucky that we left when we did. I see some of the others struggle with what they saw and experienced... especially Reaper. That shit haunts him."

Tears prick my eyes. "That's horrible."

"Awww, babe." He places a soft kiss on my shoulder that warms my heart. "Don't get upset. Life happens. Every club member has a shitty life story, but that's also what brought us together. Family is who you choose it to be." He hugs me tighter. "Now get some sleep."

"Bossy," I mutter.

"Damn straight. Night, babe."