Chapter 22

Rosabel La Rouge

Like I said before, I had a plan, and it might not have been the best of plans, but at least it gave me direction.

That’s why I found myself in a town called Dackston a little past nine a.m. the next morning.

Sleeping in the car was not ideal, and not just because it was uncomfortable, either. I had to sleep sitting up, forehead to the wheel, because I wanted to be able to start driving right away if I needed to.

I went back to the safe house once more last night, just to make sure Taland hadn’t returned and was looking for me. He hadn’t. The house was still as empty as I’d left it. Then I parked the car right inside the ward that shielded the narrow street from the main road, and I forced myself to sleep for about four hours because I needed the energy. If I was going to remain focused on my search, I would need food and sleep, so I gave myself no other choice.

It had been the right call because when I arrived in Dackston, I was wide awake, my muscles rested, my stomach full with the snacks Taland had bought for us two days ago. I was ready to fight if it came to it, even though my spell would hold for a few more hours. Still, you never really knew what the IDD had up their sleeve—or even my grandmother. She’d found me in the basement of the Tivoux bothers somehow. Maybe she could find me in this town now in the same way.

I left my car just past the big blue sign that welcomed me to Dackston, and I continued on foot. This town was bigger than the last one, with a lot more people coming and going, and a lot more buildings and shops and houses, too. My eyes were wide open, my ears strained, and I scanned the faces of every single person that passed me by to make sure I didn’t miss Taland.

He said he had a safe in this place, money and keys to a car, so it would make sense that he’d come here. It would make sense that he’d be here if he was trying to run away.

Or…maybe he’d just told me about it— everything , with specific details—because he knew he’d be gone?

Maybe he had planned to disappear all along for whatever reason, and he’d given me the name of the safe and the password and the town, all these details so I could find my way here on my own.

I stopped in the middle of a wide street lined with shops on the right, and small houses on the left. I breathed in deeply, tried to imagine a reason, any reason at all why Taland would want to leave me like that and disappear without a word. Without a note.

I came up empty-handed, and that old voice in my head, my nemesis, was back at it like it had been waiting for this moment for years, to remind me that I did not know Taland at all.

Of course, you can’t think of a reason—you don’t know who he is.

Of course, he ran away without a word or a note—he doesn’t owe you anything.

What did you think, that just because you fucked and you hugged and you kissed, you were really going to be together forever now? He probably ran from you because he knows what’s coming for you…

On and on and on it went, that voice, and it laughed and mocked me, and I almost— almost believed everything it said. But then I’d been here so many times before, battling it. I’d fought it with my everything in the endless nights I’d spent in my room without Taland and being aware of what it was had changed everything for me— a liar.

That voice of doubt was a fucking liar, and it only had power over me when I believed it.

So, I didn’t, or I pretended that I didn’t until I actually rolled my internal eyes at everything that stupid voice said.

Even so, I didn’t feel any better as I continued to walk down the wide street, hoping against hope that I saw Taland sitting somewhere, smiling at me, waving—and I wouldn’t even care. At this point I wouldn’t care that he left without a word, just that I found him.

I didn’t, though.

Instead, I found the shop he told me about, the one I came to this town for— Annie’s Antiques. I doubted they had two antique shops in a single town, so I went straight for it, breath held and hands fisted, hoping. Always hoping.

No Taland in the shop, either.

It was a big space almost half empty, with shelves upon shelves on all sides, and things bundled together on the floor everywhere—rocking chairs and old grandfather clocks and record players and comic books and magazines, so many things my head was spinning ten seconds in when I tried to see everything at once.

“Hey, there, stranger. Welcome to Dackston. It’s a small town, but it has the biggest heart!”

I turned to the left, to what was probably a reception desk, but it was so full of things that I had missed it. It looked just like all the other piles around the wide space.

The woman who’d spoken was standing behind it, with a bright pink sweater on and light blonde hair pulled up in a bun. Her nails were all painted in different colors, and her blush was so orange that it made her skin look kind of grayish, and I almost asked her, why don’t you put all this stuff on the shelves? There’s plenty of space. You don’t have to keep them on the floor like this.

But then again, what did I know about antique shops?

“Hello,” I said, surprised for a second that I had to speak to another being, like I’d expected this place to be empty. I cleared my throat. “Hello, hi.”

“Hello, hi,” the woman repeated, then laughed. She was older than me, but there was a youthfulness to her blue eyes that her wrinkles hadn’t faded. Her smile was fake, but it wasn’t malicious. “What can I do you for? We have a lot of stuff, but if you tell me what you need, I can help you find it.” She walked around the desk and the two big piles next to it. “And please excuse my hair—I just opened!”

Her hair was actually perfect, but I didn’t comment. “Thank you,” I forced myself to say. “I’m actually looking for something else. Something…” I pointed my finger down toward the floor. “Something that’s down there.”

The way the smile on her face dropped could have been funny, and she looked surprised, which beat me. She was Iridian, and she could probably feel the magic that clung to the air about me, just like I felt hers.

“Oh. You’re a mage,” she said, and again, she sounded surprised. I’d have asked her why if I’d cared. “You own a safe?”

Her voice had changed, too, and I hated when people did this. When they were nice and fake and polite one second, then changed completely the next. Erfes in Night City had done the same. Vuvu, too, now that I thought about it.

And I was probably sick in the head or something because I actually missed Night City. Not I wish I could go back to it miss, but I’m sad that it exists and that I’ll never get to see it again miss, which made no sense whatsoever.

“I, uh…yes, I do.” Because if I said that somebody else owned it, there was a small chance she’d refuse to show me, so I just pretended. I lied—and so what? “It’s in my name, actually. Rosabel Tivoux.”

The name I’m going to have when I marry Taland was what I thought—what I had thought two days ago when he told me this in bed.

And I’d felt so special. I’d been so damn happy it was ridiculous.

Look at me now.

The woman raised her brows. “Well, Rosabel Tivoux, you’re gonna have to wait till I have half my coffee. That’s the rules.”

She turned around and went back to that messy desk, then sat down somewhere behind it and disappeared from my view completely. I said nothing, a part of me sure that she was joking, but she wasn’t.

No—she made me wait almost ten whole minutes while she drank her coffee and scrolled through the apps of her phone—I heard the sound of the videos—before she stood up again.

By then I was about ready to grow claws and cut her to pieces, but I reminded myself that I needed her still. I needed to see in the basement, to find out whether Taland had taken the car keys he said would be here somewhere, and the money he’d stashed. I needed her, and so I bit my tongue until I tasted blood and forced a smile on my face.

Strangely, the woman didn’t look so grey anymore. That coffee had worked—she looked more alive, her eyes brighter, her smile more genuine.

She went and locked the door of the shop, turned the sign to Closed, and sighed. “Follow me—and better make it quick. I have customers, believe it or not.”

Then she went for the right side of the shop to a door half hidden by a shelf. She pushed it back without much effort and unlocked it without ever looking back to see if I was still there.

The corridor she took us to was narrow and dark, and it smelled of dust and old things and magic. A lot of magic.

I followed her to the other end and down a spiral stairway made of metal that drove me nearly mad every time our feet fell on the steps. Downstairs was another door, and near it a small lamp mounted on the old, cracked wall. The woman pulled her wand from below her pink sweater and began to whisper furiously as blue flames spread from the tip of her wand and onto the surface of the door.

The spell was over a minute long, and when she was done, she took in a deep breath and turned to look at me.

“If you touch anything that isn’t yours behind this door, you will die.”

Without waiting for a reply, she stepped back and pulled the door open.

It was heavy, almost as thick as the width of my shoulders, and the room inside was divided into two. The first part was an empty space with a wooden tabletop extending a few inches from the yellow walls. Across from us was a glass partition with an opening in the middle, and on the other side of it were the safes built into the walls, about forty of them with metal doors and these small glass spheres hovering in front of them.

When she stepped through the threshold to the other side, the woman turned to me and raised her wand.

I stopped and my heart stopped, and my lungs held the air in them tightly as well.

“If you are here to steal or to take something that wasn’t specifically meant for you or if you weren’t given permission to see into this safe you claim as yours and if you’re trying to trick me in any way, you will die as soon as you step through this door.”

Holy shit. “Oh.”

“Yes— oh. ” She blinked her eyes at me rapidly with a big fake smile on. “So, think well—the spell cannot be cheated. It strips you of any magics you might have on your person. This is not the place to steal stuff, Iridian. If that’s what you’re after, I suggest you try someplace else.”

Now I was sweating.

“What if the person who bought this safe only told me about it, and I’m not sure if they specifically gave me permission to see inside it?” I just wanted to see if Taland had been here, if he had taken the damn car!

The woman shrugged. “Do you have the password?”

I swallowed hard. “Yes.”

“Then maybe they did give you permission—who knows? You coming in or not?” She actually looked bored .

“Fuck.” The word slipped from me involuntarily.

I took a step forward and went right through the threshold because I knew that if I stopped to think about it, I’d just be wasting time. In the end it didn’t matter how much I feared death-by-safe-room—I was going to see if Taland had been here one way or the other. Might as well get it over with quickly, and if I died, well…

“ Oh, my goddess. ”

The woman gasped.

I looked at her and expected to not be able to see her at all because I supposed I was dead already if she gasped like that.

Except I wasn’t.

I was still standing, still breathing, and my heart was beating—all in my ears, which was why I was so sure. While the woman took a step back and looked at me with her mouth open and eyes wide like I really was a fucking ghost.

“ What?!” I said, panicked myself— why the hell is she looking at me like that? I didn’t die, damn it. I was ninety-nine percent sure that I was still alive!

Then…

“It’s you ,” the woman said. “You’re the winner of the Iris Roe.”

Oh, hell.

Every inch of my skin raised in goose bumps and my stomach threatened to relieve me of everything I’d eaten in the car before coming to this fucking town.

You’re the winner of the Iris Roe, Rora!

How the hell had I forgotten that? How could I even go around with this face that had been all over the tabloids and on TV and social media— how the fuck did you forget?!

Seriously, my own stupidity astounded me sometimes.

“I-I-I?—”

The woman burst out laughing. “Are you serious? It’s really you ?!”

Fuck, I was sweating worse than when I thought I was going to die. I would have rather died than to be in my skin right now—seriously, I just wanted to go back. To the other side of the door, upstairs where I hadn’t been the winner of the Iris Roe, when I’d?—

Wait a minute.

My ears rang and I looked at the woman who had both hands to her chest and actual tears in her eyes as she looked at me, no longer laughing but smiling ear to ear.

And she said, “How in the world did you do that?!”

But what I was thinking was, “Why didn’t you recognize me upstairs?” When I first entered the store, there was far more light up there than down here.

The woman shook her head and narrowed her brows. “The spell!” she told me. “Whatever spell you’re using—you didn’t look like you at all!”

Holy shit.

“I told you this room strips away all spells. I’ll admit, though, whatever you are using was good. So good—I could have never guessed in a billion years!”

Again, she laughed. Again, I felt like I might throw up all that I’d eaten.

Instead, I reached for my pocket and the little charm I’d put in there—Taland’s charm. The one his mother had made him. The one he’d used to alter his appearance and to remain hidden from the IDD.

He hadn’t just left it there or forgot it.

Fuck, he’d given it to me.

Tears in my eyes as I spun the charm between my fingers right there in the pocket because I didn’t want this woman to see. He’d given me his charm, his mother’s charm. He’d given it to me, just like that.

“You’ve got to take a selfie with me. I left my phone upstairs, but we can do it on the way out— wow! Rosabel La Rouge!”

I had never hated being me more than I did in those moments, not even when in Madeline’s presence.

“Actually, it’s against the rules,” I choked, the lie coming to me out of nowhere. Or maybe out of my desire to survive —who knew? “I, uh…I signed an NDA with the IDD. They forbade me from taking selfies and from appearing anywhere without their knowledge.”

Her smile faltered. “Oh,” the woman said. “Is that why you’re using a disguise?”

Goddess, it was so hot in here, and the only thing keeping me grounded was that charm between my fingers.

“Yes, exactly,” I said. “Exactly that. So, you can’t tell anybody that?—”

“Oh, I most certainly will!” the woman cut me off. “The IDD can’t stop me from talking— I can’t wait to tell everybody that you were here!” She giggled and jumped up and down like a little girl, and I died of embarrassment and came alive with anger again.

Fuck, fuck, fuck, I couldn’t believe I’d forgotten that everybody knew my face.

And I also couldn’t believe that Taland had forgotten.

Of course, he didn’t forget. Of course, he left me his mother’s charm. Of course, he looked after me even when he wasn’t there. Which made the question of why he’d disappeared even worse.

What the hell could have possibly taken him from that safe house? Why would he leave me like this? Why-why-why ?

“I’ll pay you,” I choked, and the woman stopped clapping. “If the IDD finds out I’m here, I will be in a lot of trouble. I need a week—can you do that? Keep it to yourself for one week, and I’ll pay you.” I reached in my inside pocket for my wallet and gave her all the cash I had, over a thousand dollars. I couldn’t use my card to draw out more without alerting the IDD. Standard procedure to keep an eye on bank account activity when hunting down a fugitive.

The woman wrinkled her nose. “You’re going to have to do better than that. A thousand bucks ain’t gonna cut it. Try… ten .”

Goddess, I wanted to murder her with my own hands right now. Rage like the magically induced one I’d felt in the Redfire challenge of the Iris Roe took over me, and I even saw red. But I’d come here for a reason, and I’d had no idea that I was even wearing a different face, so I couldn’t have been prepared for this. Not with a hat or a wig or makeup. I hadn’t thought anything through because I was completely consumed by thoughts of where Taland was and why he’d disappeared.

So, I forced that anger down, took in a deep breath, and said, “Sure. Let me through to my safe first, and I’ll give you ten grand.”

The greed in her eyes was disgusting. “For a week,” she said.

“For a week.” A week would be more than enough time for me to get to the other side of the world if I had to—just as soon as I found Taland.

“Deal, Miss La Rouge.” She offered me her hand. “Let’s shake on it.”

When I touched her hand, she squealed. Actually squealed and it was awkward as fuck and now I wanted to do anything but stay here. Anything at all.

Instead, I just stood my ground and focused on my breathing and allowed her to shake my hand a million times before she let go, stepped back, and said, “Password?”

“Tallarose.” I was actually surprised that I didn’t scream it at her face.

Then she curtsied. “Be right with ya.”

She turned around and walked into the safe room, and I waited there, hands fisted and tongue between my teeth—anything at all to keep myself under control. Patience had never really been my strong suit and right now what little of it I had was being tested, but I managed to not follow her to the safes, at least. All I did was watch.

The woman walked around the room, searching the safes as she hummed a melody I didn’t recognize. She read the names on the safe doors in order. The letters were tiny so I couldn’t see them from here, but then she would turn to look at me and smile every few seconds, and my stomach would twist and turn in anger, yet I somehow didn’t scream at her to hurry the fuck up.

Eventually, she found the safe she was looking for, the second row from the ground on the left side. She squatted in front of it and announced, “We have a winner!”

She produced her wand again, waved it at the glass sphere hovering in front of the safe door, and began to whisper. I didn’t hear nor understand any other word of what she said, just that password at the end— Tallarose.

Me and Taland. Together—like we were just two days ago.

The sphere began to glow blue all of a sudden, and the woman laughed again.

“Correct.” The glowing sphere moved away while she pulled a box from the safe and brought it to me, still smiling.

It was like a large drawer with no lid or cover over it, just a black bag inside. The woman put it on the tabletop extending from the wall and stepped back, waving both hands toward it.

“Here you go. Your safe is ready for ya! Do you need me to leave, or can I?—”

“Yes, please.” The words left my mouth so fast it could have been funny.

Her smile faltered. “All righty, then. I’ll be right outside, waiting for the rest of my moooneeey,” she sang, rubbing her hands together while she gave me a sweet, innocent smile—or she tried to.

I said nothing, just turned to the safe and waited until she walked out, whispering, Rosabel La Rouge, goddess, what a morning!

Fuck, this woman was going to drive me mad.

“Remember—if you try to get close to the other safes or touch something you’re not supposed to, you’ll die on the spo-ot! ” She pushed the door closed all the way, and I successfully held back a scream of frustration.

Instead, I grabbed that bag inside the safe and opened it right away.

Money. Stacks of twenty grand were inside, a lot of them, and at first, I didn’t see the key. It was buried deep at the bottom, and I had to empty the bag onto the table just to reach it.

A single key to a Range Rover attached to a keychain with the name Graveyard Junk printed on both sides. The key he’d told me about.

Taland had not been here to pick up money or the car.

Closing my eyes, I held onto the edge of the table and let out a deep breath. It was okay—this didn’t mean anything. Even if he’d have taken his car, I wouldn’t have known where he drove it, so it was perfectly fine. I hadn’t expected to find him here, anyway, but it was still disappointing as hell. It still hurt, cut me wide open, because the more time passed, the heavier the reality of the situation was getting on my shoulders.

Taland is gone and I am all alone. No explanation, no nothing—just alone.

I took my time, cried a few tears there in that room, and when I was ready to leave, I took the keys, took as much money as I could fit in my clothes, and returned the rest to the bag and the safe.

The woman was waiting for me right outside, just like she promised, and I handed her another nine grand to keep her mouth shut for a week.

It wasn’t often that I hated people I’d just met, but for her I made an exception.

She led me upstairs to her antique shop again, and on the way to the exit, I saw this little figure craved out of wood and my heart all but beat right out of my chest.

It was a vulcera. A tiny vulcera with the paint chipped around the edges, and the eyes were white, not green, but the antennas on her back were painted in all the colors of the rainbow.

My heart squeezed and I wished with all my being that she was here with me. To keep me company, to give me strength, to let me pet her.

“How much for this?” I asked the woman, but she waved me off.

“It’s on the house.” she told me. “It doesn’t do anything, if that’s what you’re thinking. None of this stuff has any magic in it. It’s for humans only.”

“I know.” I didn’t know, but I didn’t want her to keep going about it, either.

“Can you tell me if there’s a Graveyard Junk around here somewhere?” I asked when she unlocked the door and turned the sign over again, then stepped to the side, smiling genuinely now. Her cheeks were flushed which made them look extra orange. She was radiating happiness with that ten grand in her pockets.

“There sure is. Just walk straight ahead and take two lefts. You can’t miss it,” the woman said. “Won’t you tell me a little something about the Roe? Something nobody else knows? Pretty please?”

I swallowed hard. “Can’t do that. The NDA agreement forbids it,” I lied.

She frowned. “Just a little something.” She leaned closer and whispered, “You weren’t really Mud, were you? I mean, I saw you on TV but a girl’s curious.”

“If you saw me then you have your answer,” I forced myself to say—it was the best I could do because I didn’t want to lie about that again, at least. Not to anyone.

The woman nodded reluctantly. “And the challenges? What about the one in that city? What about the dragons and?—”

“I really have to go now,” I cut her off and walked outside.

“Of course, of course” she said, holding the door open. “It was such a pleasure to meet you, Rosabel. I will be holding my secret for a week, but then I’m telling everyone how delightful you are!”

I almost started running.

But when I was on the sidewalk, she remained there with her arms crossed, watching me still, and I could see my reflection in the glass perfectly fine. I looked just like me , which made me curious—too curious not to ask.

“What do I look like to you now?” I asked, knowing that I might regret it later, but I’d regret it more if I didn’t ask.

“Oh, very…plain,” she said with a shrug. “Brown eyes, short brown hair, chubby cheeks and a smaller mouth. Different from your real self.”

I nodded.

“But pretty still, of course!”

She must have really thought I cared. “Thanks a lot,” I said and turned around to walk away, go find Graveyard Junk and get the hell out of this place already.

“You’re very welcome. Come back again—any time,” she called. “Thank you for your purchase!”

Don’t look back, don’t look back, don’t look back, I whispered to myself, because it wasn’t okay to attack someone just for being annoying. Not okay, Rora. Keep walking.

I did. By some miracle, even after she called after me to tell me that we would make just the greatest friends in the world if I came back, I walked away without a word.