Chapter 18

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

C olson

“I swear to God I’ll look up how to make goat cheese, you hillbilly.”

I held my finger out to Cleveland in warning. We were locked in a death-stare battle after he’d rammed my thigh once already this afternoon. Cleveland’s tongue flapped in the air like an ornery child before disappearing again, like he did it just to piss me off. Pretty much everything this stupid goat did pissed me off. Here I was, feeding the animals for Mom, and this one had to give me a bruise for my troubles.

I was already in a bad mood from Tully sneaking out of my bed this morning like I was some kind of dirty secret. I’d spent the day splitting logs just to have something to do with my anger. Mom had run out of the house, hollering about being late for her sewing club. She asked me to feed the animals right as she hopped in her car and left. I didn’t have a chance to say no before I was eating her dust.

Thistle leaned into my leg like a cat rubbing herself alongside me. She was the polar opposite of her penmate. If I sat down, she’d sit right on my lap and beg for some scratches behind her ears. Bessie shifted closer on the other side of the fence, wanting a front-row seat to the drama. I’d already worked my charm on her this morning and milked her. It was just a bonus that Warrick couldn’t get near her when I could. Little brothers always wanted to beat their big bullies—I mean, brothers.

My phone rang loudly from my back pocket, startling all of us. Cleveland jumped in the air and then fell to his side, legs locked stiff like the dead. Bessie mooed and shifted away from the fence. I barely dodged getting a load of fertilizer on my boots as Thistle startled.

I grabbed the call from my little brother and backed out of the pen, keeping a close eye on Cleveland until the gate was locked shut behind me. He moved fast for a goat, and I’d put nothing past him.

“Hey, Boon.”

“’Sup, man. What are you up to?”

I rolled my eyes as the chickens all started running for me. They knew they were next for their feeding time. Mom thought all these critters were cute. I thought they were mostly a nuisance. Hayes was all the pet I needed.

“Feeding these damn animals for our mother. You know, the woman you ignore?”

Boon made a loud noise in my ear. “I call my mommy plenty, loser. Unlike you, who didn’t return my last two voicemails.”

I dug my hand into the feed bag and threw out the kernels in a broad arc. The chickens diverted from heading my direction and scattered to peck at the ground. “Yeah, I didn’t have a chance to call you back. Been working a real man’s job, not playing with my balls and spittin’ chew.”

“Fuck off,” Boon scoffed, like I knew he would. We all gave him shit for playing the game of baseball when we all knew he’d worked his ass off to get to the majors. “I heard you’re sniffing around Tully Cassio again, following her around like a puppy dog.”

Brothers can be brutal. No matter how old we got, we still liked to press each other’s buttons. Boon knew what button to push since it was the only button I’d ever had. “I better never hear her name out of your mouth, brother, or you won’t have a mouth to say anything ever again.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. I was just giving you shit.” Boon was quick to take a few giant steps back. “Seriously, I heard from Warrick that she’s back in Blueball, and I wanted to check in with you. I know she had you in a dark place for awhile. Just making sure you’re keeping your distance.”

The red haze cleared a bit from my vision. “Well, she’s living at Mom’s house with me right now.”

Boon cursed under his breath before shouting at me. “Why the fuck would you do that?”

I left the chicken coop and headed for the house. “Well, I saved her and her mama from a house fire and she needed somewhere to stay.”

“Oh great, so you played the hero and now you’re living with her again?” Boon blew out a breath. “At least Mom’s there to keep you two in line.”

Visions of Tully on her knees last night choking on my dick wasn’t exactly what Boon meant by keeping in line.

“Hello?” When I didn’t answer fast enough, he continued. “Oh shit. You’re already head over ass for her again, aren’t you?”

I blinked away the memories and had a seat in the rocker on the porch. “She offered up a no-strings, sex-only situationship.”

Boon sounded like he was choking. “Damn. I’m the professional athlete and yet these things happen to you. Well, shit, Col, you better take her up on that.”

“You just said to stay away from her!”

“Well, that’s when I was worried you’d fall in love with her again. This is far better. Fuck her brains out, but don’t catch feelings.”

That red haze was coming back. “Watch what you say about her, fucker.”

Boon whistled into my ear. “Listen, who cares if you do catch feelings. If you’re together, who needs a piece of paper like a marriage license? That’s where you went wrong before. So intent on putting a ring on it when you didn’t need all that bullshit. Fuck her good enough and she’ll stay with you.”

I rolled my eyes. “Taking relationship advice from my little brother who’s never been married? Sounds like a terrible idea.”

“I’m exactly who you should take advice from! I’ve managed to stay single my whole life, a skill you could use, by the way.”

I scoffed. “You think Kinsley would agree that’s a valuable skill?”

Now it was Boon’s turn to throw the threats around. “Leave my daughter out of this.”

“You’ve done a good enough job leaving her out of things all on your own, brother."

I could hear Boon breathing into the phone, so pissed he couldn’t even speak. Boon’s button to push was always his daughter. He’d had her with a girl who’d chased him after he made the big leagues. They’d broken up while she was still pregnant, and his daughter had lived full-time with her mother ever since. It was a sore spot with him that he’d never been more of a father to Kinsley. Mom and Dad had pushed him to take a more active role in Kinsley’s life, but he’d insisted she was better off with her mother.

“Get your ass to Blueball already,” I finally said, breaking the angry silence.

“I’m in the middle of my season, douchebag. I haven’t even announced my retirement yet.”

I shrugged, though he couldn’t see me. I watched all his games, though I’d never tell him that. “They haven’t been playing you much this season.”

Boon sounded deflated. “It’s this stupid shoulder. Can’t take another hit at third or I’ll be out for good.”

I rocked back and forth. “I know the feeling. I’m not sure I can take another hit either.”

We both knew I was talking about Tully.

“Remember what I said about catching feelings, man. Don’t do that shit.”

“I’ll try.”

We hung up, neither of us any wiser than when he’d called me. He’d identified the underlying problem though. I didn’t feel good enough for Tully. She was a Hollywood celebrity with plenty of money in the bank. I was some small-town firefighter putting on a fundraiser just to keep his job. I wasn’t enough to keep her back when we were young and had our whole lives ahead of us. What did I possibly have now to keep her?

Fuckin’ nothing, that’s what.

I stood up, letting the rocker hit the siding of the house with a bang. I hated feeling sorry for myself. I’d done enough of that the first year after Tully left me. Digging my keys out of my pocket, I headed for my truck. I cruised through town, letting my brain wander. Then I made a U-turn, coming back through town and stopping at Sophia’s driveway. Tully’s white Range Rover was parked out front, along with a work truck. I wasn’t ready to see her just yet, so I headed for the dirt road around back that led to the river. I parked and climbed out, heading for that flat rock that probably had an indentation of my ass in it by now. It’s where I always went to think. Couldn’t tell you how many times Sofia would find me out here over the years, a bottle of ice-cold water in her hands for me.

The jingle of Hayes’s collar brought me out of my musings sometime later. I twisted my neck to see him ambling next to Tully as they headed for the rock where I currently sat. Tully raised her hand and smiled, looking pleased to see me. I wasn’t sure if she’d be pissed at me for how I handled her so roughly last night. Thought that might be why she snuck out before I woke up.

“Hey,” she said pleasantly, plopping down next to me on the rock. She smelled like wood and paint with her work clothes on and her hair in an all-business ponytail. Hayes took the other side of me, laying his head on my leg.

“You stealing my dog now?” I responded, feeling a bit jealous that Hayes had clearly been with her all day.

Tully laughed. “No, but he’s a sweetheart. And a good conversationalist.”

I frowned. “You’re telling me he talks to you?”

Tully only laughed harder, looking younger with her eyes dancing like that. “No, but he listens real well.”

I could stare at her all day. Then I remembered what Boon had said and forced myself to look back at the water trickling lazily down the river. “I, uh, wanted to apologize for?—”

“I swear, if you apologize for last night, I might push you in that water,” Tully snapped, all sass and attitude.

I gaped at her.

Her cheeks were pink, but she didn’t drop my gaze. “I liked it, Colson. And if you agree to my offer, we can do that more often.”

I’d come here to think, but Tully referring to more sex just made every drop of blood flow to my dick instead of my brain. I was nodding before I’d fully formed a thought. Tully’s face lit up.

“Is that a yes?”

“Yeah.” My voice squeaked like a pre-teen boy. I cleared my throat and tried again. “Yes.”

Tully hopped to her feet and whipped her shirt over her head, leaving her in work boots, jeans, and a pink satin bra. I looked down at Hayes and then around us, surveying the trees for signs of life.

“Here?” My dick leaped in my jeans, making things a bit more snug than comfortable in there.

Tully shrugged and whipped off the bra. My mouth went dry looking at her pert little boobs, nipples puckered already. “You said we had to sneak it, right? What better place than where we used to make out for hours?”

I mean, her logic was sound. Who was I to argue? I pulled my shirt from my body and got up to spread it out in the grass a couple trees over. I made a noise with my mouth and Hayes reluctantly got up, walking over and flopping back down on the makeshift bed I’d made him.

“Good boy,” I purred. “Now take a nap and don’t worry if you hear things.”

He huffed out his nose like he was barely tolerating me, but he did close his eyes. Good enough for me. I headed back over to Tully. She’d gotten her boots and socks off, leaving just her skintight jeans. Then a thought hit me.

“Wait, I don’t have a condom on me.”

Tully tilted her head. “I have an IUD. Never failed me before. And I’m clean. You?”

I nodded, excitement clouding over any little voices telling me that this was a bad idea. We hadn’t even had sex without a condom when we were married. She’d been too scared she’d get pregnant before we were ready for that step. “Clean.”

“Then we’re good.” Tully shoved her jeans and panties down, kicking them off her feet. She stood before me, naked as the day she was born, but with a whole lot more curves and valleys. “How do you want me?”