Chapter 16

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

C olson

Can a kiss unlock a new level of anger like some kind of twisted adult version video game with sucky graphics and depths of emotional despair a human would never want to feel? Because that’s where I was at, lying in my bed, trying to pretend like kissing Tully hadn’t rocked my world in the worst way.

I spent literal years trying to get over that woman. And I succeeded. I mean, it took a move to another town to start a whole new life and almost two decades, but she was finally out of my head. Then Dad had forced my move back to Blueball and fate decided to fuck me over again by sending Tully home too.

And now I’d invited her into my mother’s home and she was standing in the hallway outside my door. Doing what? I didn’t fucking know. The woman was insane. She’d managed to wedge herself back into my head, even while I was so pissed at her I couldn’t see straight. There seriously had to be something wrong with me. Who covets their ex-wife, then kisses them up against their locker, and invites more drama back into their life?

I rolled my eyes and huffed out a frustrated breath. My dick was tenting the sheets, paying zero mind to the fact I wanted to take this pillow and shove it into Tully’s face for a long minute or two.

“You just gonna fuckin’ breathe on my door all night?” I called out into the silence.

The breathing noises cut off immediately, but then the hinges on the door creaked and a sliver of light spilled into the room.

“You awake?” Tully whispered.

I rolled my eyes again, this time to the heavens to beg for some goddamn patience to deal with this woman. “No. I just talk in my sleep, Tully.”

She crept in, a short shadow until she stood right next to my bed. I could just make out her face, hair piled messily on top of her head. “I can’t sleep.”

My hand lifted to swipe down my mustache but hit bare skin. “Count sheep or put on some white noise playlist. Do what normal people do when they can’t sleep.”

Tully snorted. “What? Normal people don’t creep into their ex-husband’s bedroom?”

I pushed upright and slid so that my back was resting against the headboard. My hands did their best to stack on my lap and hide the erection that hadn’t gone away since kissing Tully. “What do you want?”

She winced and I felt an arrow of regret for my sharp tone. “You’re getting better at being mean to me.”

She wasn’t wrong. Back when we divorced, I hadn’t been angry. I’d been devastated. The anger came later, after she’d already left for greener pastures. I never said mean things to her during our divorce because I was just so emotionally spun out. I’d tried to desperately hold on to her, which in hindsight had probably made her more determined to leave me.

“Still not telling me why you’re here.”

Tully nodded, the tips of her fingers messing with the sheet where it touched her legs. “You know how you said chemistry was never our problem?” I didn’t answer, but I nodded my agreement. “Well, I was thinking that maybe that’s where we went wrong. We were highly attracted to each other as teens. We took that attraction and forced a marriage on it. Maybe we should have just fucked each other’s brains out.”

I choked and had to clear my throat. Young Tully would never have spoken so clearly. I also wholeheartedly disagreed with her. Sure, there was heavy attraction, but I’d also loved her with every fiber of my being. There was no forcing when it came time to get married. It had been as natural as breathing to want to tie myself to this woman until I took that last breath. But Tully began to wave her hands through the air, latching on to this theory of hers.

“And clearly the attraction is still there, even after all this time. So, I got to thinking. We’re both single and adults. Maybe we should do things differently this time. We should just be fuck buddies.”

I felt a little like Cleveland, Mom’s most ornery goat that she was trying to train to do tricks. Poised to jump up and snatch that treat out of Mom’s hand, he knew there’d be other hoops to jump through but he wanted that snack so badly he’d accept all the other bullshit he’d have to do later.

Folding my arms across my chest to keep from grabbing her and throwing her down on this bed, I evaluated what she was offering. “You want a sex-only relationship.”

Tully shook her head. “No. Not a relationship at all. No feelings, no commitments, just sex.”

She was basically offering what every man dreams of.

And I didn’t fucking want it.

Okay. Wait. Yes, I did.

“Fuck!” I muttered, hands scrubbing over my face.

Tully must have lost patience watching me wrestle with myself about this issue because she stripped her T-shirt over her head and stood there at my bedside with a pair of flimsy shorts on and nothing else. My gaze dropped to her boobs because it was physically impossible not to. They’d gotten slightly bigger over the years, though still small by most women’s standards. They were fucking perfect. Especially without being covered in mud this time.

“Tully,” I groaned.

She hooked her thumbs in her shorts, ready to strip out of those too. If she did that, there’d be no going back. No decision to be made. She’d have made my decision for me. Again.

“Wait!”

She froze, looking so gorgeous and eager I was going to punch myself in the face later for stopping her.

“My mother’s sleeping right across the way. This doesn’t feel right.” Maybe it was from all those years dating her when we were teenagers and having to sneak around. Or maybe it was just the fact that if I ever got inside that pussy again, I wasn’t going to stop until Tully was screaming my name to the high heavens. Mom didn’t need to be witness to that.

“Where, then?” Tully asked, rubbing her thighs together like she just couldn’t wait. Not gonna lie, I liked seeing her hot and bothered for me. Liked it very much.

I grinned. I might just die from lack of blood flow to the rest of my body, but at least I’d have this in my memory: Tully standing half naked before me, begging me to have sex with her. It somehow soothed some of the pride that had been ripped to shreds when she left me.

“Where we used to always sneak out to, I guess.” I didn’t have a house and neither did she, but we’d find a way to make it work.

Tully’s bottom lip rolled, a familiar pout that used to have me jumping to attention to solve whatever had made her upset. I was done jumping.

“Are you sure? I can be quiet.” Her hand lifted, fingertips trailing up her stomach and under one breast to cup herself.

I shook my head, even as I pushed down on my straining erection. “Nah. You’re gonna have to work for me this time, Cassio.”

I’d been the one to pursue her all those years ago. I’d pursued her hard and it had worked. Until it didn’t. If she wanted me now, even just for sex, she’d have to pursue me . The shift in the power dynamic between us felt damn good.

Tully’s hand dropped to stroke my thigh on top of the sheet that still covered me. “At least let me have a little taste. You gave me a good idea back there at the station.”

Well, fuck. If she put it that way…

My eyelids drooped and every single drop of blood in my body headed to my dick. “I won’t be nice, princess.”

Tully held my gaze, then dropped to her knees right there on the cold floor. I’d never jumped to my feet faster than that moment, not even when responding to a house fire. The sheet was gone and my dick was bopping her in the face. She grinned and dashed out her hot tongue to swipe across the tip. My groan was out before I could pull it back, loud and alarming in the silence of the night. I gritted my teeth and tried to retain some sense of reality so I wouldn’t make noise no matter what Tully did in the next few minutes.

Her hand wrapped around my dick in a tight sleeve, her other hand gently cupping my balls. She didn’t waste a single second. She slid my length inside her lips and swallowed me down until her nose was buried in the hair I kept trimmed. She hummed as she slid back up and I felt that vibration all the way to my toes. Shivers wracked my body and I gritted my teeth to the point of pain in my jaw. My dick was shiny with her spit and suddenly cold. She laved the tip with her tongue, over and over, teasing me while also not giving me what I need.

Some tiny voice in the back of my head that wasn’t just stuttering and shaking over a blowjob out of nowhere yelled at me that I was supposed to be mean to her. My fingers speared into her thick hair and I cupped the back of her skull. More than anything I wanted my dick back in that heat box of a mouth, not toyed with like she was currently doing.

“Hold on,” I warned her.

Her hands dropped away from my body and I took the path of no resistance and dove back into her mouth. She opened her jaw wide and greeted me with her rough tongue. I pulled back and instantly slammed back in, further this time. I felt her throat convulse, and while part of me winced at what was probably uncomfortable for her, the other part of me fucking loved it. So I kept abusing her mouth, in and out, pushing further down her throat each time. She let me, her head back, mouth open and her throat welcoming me.

Tears gathered in the corner of her eyes and I focused on them. How many tears did I shed when she left me behind? She groaned as I pulled out of her mouth, her nostrils flaring as she sucked in air. Then I noticed her hand going beneath the waistband of her shorts. No. There would be no pleasure for this woman tonight. I wasn’t joking. She’d have to work to get anything from me this time around.

I thrusted back into her mouth, harder than before. Her throat worked around me, gagging on me as darts of pleasure climbed up my back and into my balls. I took in the dishevelment of her hair, her face, the track of a tear that leaked out of the corner of her eye. I shot my load. Down her throat and spilling into her mouth, wave after wave of hot liquid. My eyes squeezed shut and every muscle in my body locked up in a pleasure so great I wasn’t sure I could stay on my feet. She swallowed me down repeatedly without a single grunt of displeasure.

Stepping back, I pulled from her mouth and opened my eyes. Cum and saliva coated her chin while she swayed on her knees. Her hair looked like the rat’s nest I teased her about. Suddenly I felt terrible for treating her that way. She didn’t deserve to be on her knees with any kind of anger in my heart, not when our divorce was a long time ago and I was partly to blame.

I reached down, pulled her up to her feet, and swept her into my arms. Laying her down on my bed, I held up a finger before spinning around and exiting the room. There was a hand towel on the rack in the bathroom, which I put under the faucet and then wrung out. Back in the bedroom, I gently wiped her face and then tossed the towel into the corner of the room as I sat on the edge of the bed.

She watched me, big brown eyes holding no contempt for how I just treated her. I slid a pair of sweats on and came back to the bed. I handed her her T-shirt, which she put on.

“Sorry, Tully,” I started.

She put her hand on my forearm and sat up. “Don’t be sorry. I told you to be mean to me.” Her reddened lips tilted up into a smile. “And I kind of liked it.”

I rolled my eyes, instantly feeling better about my behavior, but not willing to touch that statement with a ten-foot pole. Tully had been gone for nineteen years. There was a lot about her and about me that had changed over the years. Tonight I was too tired to sort through it all, so I climbed into bed, pulled her into my arms, and kissed the back of her head.

“Good night.”

“’Night, Colson,” she whispered back.